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Author Topic: Finding out your real name  (Read 2204 times)

Jessiegirl

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Finding out your real name
« on: 28 April 2021, 04:44:32 pm »
One of my friends who is an escort told one of her regulars my real name. He sees me too sometimes. At first I was livid with her but she said it just slipped out. She thinks I'm overreacting as she told him her name ages ago.

He's a lovely guy so I doubt anything bad will happen or change between us.

I just wondered how everyone else feels if they find out your real name.
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EvelynWho

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Re: Finding out your real name
« Reply #1 on: 28 April 2021, 05:13:09 pm »
Just your first name?
Not sure they can do much with just that.
The thought makes me shudder but from a safety aspect I think knowing just your first name isn’t too bad??
You could also try denying it? Haha.
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saltysweet

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Re: Finding out your real name
« Reply #2 on: 28 April 2021, 05:58:21 pm »
'Friend' seems a bit of a blabbermouth. Makes you wonder what else she may let slip. First or both? I'd be unholy cross if it was both.
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thickthighs

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Re: Finding out your real name
« Reply #3 on: 28 April 2021, 06:11:06 pm »
I signed an email off with my real name once :FFI, But that was my own fault not a so-called friend disclosing that information
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Welshchick86

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Re: Finding out your real name
« Reply #4 on: 28 April 2021, 07:07:11 pm »
Quote from: Jessiegirl on 28 April 2021, 04:44:32 pm
One of my friends who is an escort told one of her regulars my real name. He sees me too sometimes. At first I was livid with her but she said it just slipped out. She thinks I'm overreacting as she told him her name ages ago.

He's a lovely guy so I doubt anything bad will happen or change between us.

I just wondered how everyone else feels if they find out your real name.

I can understand why you’d be upset, but if it was just an accident and only your first name, I’d forgive her and let it gooooo (Elsa style). I’ve let slip my own name numerous times - I’m such a crap actress haha  :-[ ::)

However, if she’s told him your full name I’d be livid too!

(Modified as I put the genders the wrong way round haha  :FF )
« Last Edit: 28 April 2021, 09:24:20 pm by Welshchick86 »
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English Green

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Re: Finding out your real name
« Reply #5 on: 28 April 2021, 09:13:32 pm »
That is annoying but it happened to me once too.

As long as big mouth do not tell clients your surname or where you live the street etc then hopefully no harm done.
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Jessiegirl

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Re: Finding out your real name
« Reply #6 on: 28 April 2021, 11:34:50 pm »
It was only my first name. I've calmed down now and happy it was a genuine mistake.
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amy

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Re: Finding out your real name
« Reply #7 on: 29 April 2021, 01:24:12 am »
Quote from: Jessiegirl on 28 April 2021, 11:34:50 pm
It was only my first name. I've calmed down now and happy it was a genuine mistake.

I had similar happen a few years ago, and the punter concerned then kept calling me by the name I'd given the woman who told him (it wasn't my legal name - she told me hers immediately when I met her so I made one up on the spot) despite my asking him not to every time he did - I blocked him in the end because it was infuriating.

She denied it, but she was the only person I'd given that name to so I knew it was her and I made sure to never trust her with anything I didn't want broadcast to the entire town ::).
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Kay

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Re: Finding out your real name
« Reply #8 on: 29 April 2021, 02:59:34 am »
Personally, I'd want to punch her lights out. It might be OK if you have a common first name, but if not it can be enough for someone to find out a lot more info about you.
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"There is no sin except stupidity" - Oscar Wilde

Rosie13

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Re: Finding out your real name
« Reply #9 on: 30 April 2021, 10:45:51 pm »
Whether she told him her name or not is irrelevant, it’s crossing a line and exposing info about you that he doesn’t need to know, particularly without your consent.

Having been burnt and aware of people with a grudge who like to talk about other providers exposing information not meant for my ears or anyone else, I’d certainly address it on a serious note and be very careful about what else is shared with this person. Might be irrelevant to her but it could be costly to you. If your name slips out, what else could be shared?

I’ve had a client find my name from picking up my post in the hall on his way for a shower, he used my real name in AW feedback and would use it in comms which I hated as I never wanted him to know. I did address it and say it made me uncomfortable and I wanted to stick only with my work name but my name kept slipping out his mouth so let’s just say he’s no longer a client.

The key thing here is, this was done without your consent and if it makes you uncomfortable, you’re more than entitled to be annoyed or to not see this client or “friend” again.
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TantricTease

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Re: Finding out your real name
« Reply #10 on: 01 May 2021, 12:08:22 pm »
When some of them find out your real name then they purposely use it to annoy you because they use it more than necessary and they would never use your working name that much, for example they say “Hi <insert real name here> are you available today/Goodbye real name/Have you been busy real name” and so on, when it’s only the 2 of you in the room then it’s pretty damn obvious that he is talking to you and so there is no need to keep addressing you by name, they obviously get pissed off that we don’t use our real names because then it’s even more proof to them that this is just a job to us, and they don’t want to think of it like a job, or they won’t ever tell you their name, for discretion issues of course, yet we’ve to tell them ours? Some of them really think our only purpose is to serve them!
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TantricTease

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Re: Finding out your real name
« Reply #11 on: 01 May 2021, 12:15:59 pm »
Rosie13 I find that shocking that the client picked up your post and no doubt he done it under the guise of being “helpful”, so many creeps in this job and I don’t think I would keep seeing him and to put your real name in AW feedback is a definite sacking offence, what a total cunt.

Your situation reminds me of the time I kept ignoring this particular client when he called and then he texted me and said “Hi REAL NAME IN CAPS, are you busy” and I just knew he was trying to piss me off, and I thought that I wasn’t going to see him anyway prior to that and he had just cemented that by using my name and in caps, but I reckon he already knew this hence him doing it in the first place, if he didn’t finger me (Back when Allowed fingering) for an hour like he was looking for something (and I fucking told him off about 100 times for it) then I wouldn’t have kept ignoring him in the first place but clearly he was a “I’m paying so you’ll do what I wish” sort of punter, and none of us want these ones.
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Rosie13

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Re: Finding out your real name
« Reply #12 on: 01 May 2021, 08:49:01 pm »
Quote from: TantricTease on 01 May 2021, 12:15:59 pm
Rosie13 I find that shocking that the client picked up your post and no doubt he done it under the guise of being “helpful”, so many creeps in this job and I don’t think I would keep seeing him and to put your real name in AW feedback is a definite sacking offence, what a total cunt.

Your situation reminds me of the time I kept ignoring this particular client when he called and then he texted me and said “Hi REAL NAME IN CAPS, are you busy” and I just knew he was trying to piss me off, and I thought that I wasn’t going to see him anyway prior to that and he had just cemented that by using my name and in caps, but I reckon he already knew this hence him doing it in the first place, if he didn’t finger me (Back when Allowed fingering) for an hour like he was looking for something (and I fucking told him off about 100 times for it) then I wouldn’t have kept ignoring him in the first place but clearly he was a “I’m paying so you’ll do what I wish” sort of punter, and none of us want these ones.

I was a relative newbie at the time and didn’t have the support network I do now plus wasn’t aware this site even existed then to think about or consider these things but the feedback thing really pissed me off. I guess I did find him in the most part to be a “nice” guy so continued to see him but every time he used my name I could feel my skin crawling. I do find the name using thing when knowing it’s not appropriate a bit like an attempt to poke the bear.
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oleyoleyWG

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Re: Finding out your real name
« Reply #13 on: 02 May 2021, 11:22:30 am »
Hi this happened to me too. I was dying inside and still am I’ve done everything I can to protect my identity and to have some else blow my cover it was a real kick in the stomach even though it was a mistake. My advice would be to work alone anyways xx
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Not today satan

RB1

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Re: Finding out your real name
« Reply #14 on: 03 May 2021, 02:44:28 pm »
X
« Last Edit: 20 September 2023, 02:11:38 pm by RB1 »
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