Hi all.

Was just wondering how 'hard a line' you ladies and gents take when dealing with potential clients who are making your lives rather annoying. Ive only recently started advertising for my own clients so I'm a bit of a newbie to it and its a minefield. Ive managed to find a way to deal with the 'can i have some more details?' question but its the various other annoying behaviours I'm struggling with.

I'm a bit concerned that I'm taking too much of a hard line with clients and maybye i should give them a bit more of a break. For example i had an outcall hotel booking all arranged for last week and a few hours before i was due to go and meet the client he sent me a text saying 'so tell me what you look like' I politely text him back saying he had seen my website which has ample amounts of photos of me on it and that i would see him at 8pm. This guy didn't get the hint and continued to text things like 'go on just describe yourself for me before i see you'. Now i wasn't having a good day to start with and after about 20 minutes i had had enough and the next text he sent i replied too by telling him i was cancelling out booking. Of course he rang me immediately asking why and i just told him straight that his behaviour was irritating me and i had decided i didn't want to spend time with him. He was utterly,utterly gobsmacked! I also suggested to him that the next time he booked an escort he might want to behave in a more appropriate way so that the next lady doesn't to the same thing.

Also yesterday i had to cancel an incall booking (wasn't my fault,hot water went off in my incall flat) the client was fine about it but then about 10 minutes later sent me a text saying 'if you send me a face picture it will encourage me to rebook you'. I didn't respond and a few hours later got another text off him saying was i upset or offended. I still haven't responded to it and frankly i cant be bothered to,hes a client not a cheesed off lover.

So what do you think,am i being too strict or am i right to treat annoying clients like this? as far as i can see a genuine client should ring,make their booking and barring natural disasters etc that should be that. I shouldn't have to bloody 'sell' myself to them,i find it irritating beyond description,why should i be swapping text etc with these people like they are my bessie mates?

Or maybye I'm just a stroppy cow

Both of those situations sound more irritating for being by text. Do you have a no sms rule? If so, don't drop it just because someone's made a booking. I relax mine a bit for people I've arranged a booking with and regulars, but not so far that I'll have conversations by text.

You don't need to put up with annoying behaviour, but I think in both cases you could have given those guys a chance. For #1: "Please stop asking. I'll explain when we meet if you like." For #2: "I'll be happy to see you another time but I don't send face pictures."

They might decide you're a cold bitch and go looking for someone new who'll flirt on the phone, or they might realise your position and behave.

Hi Colette,

I don't think you were being too harsh on either of these IMHO.

My very rough calculations of indie work and answering your own calls: For every fifteen who contact you, there will be nine who fail at the first hurdle (i.e.can't understand a word they are saying, classic TWs, won't give you their address because obviously you want it to come over and tell their wives etc etc)

There will be  five blokes who make it through the first round of initial checks, who then go onto fuck you about by rearranging/cancelling/running away when they arrive.......or who squeeze every last penny out of the booking by contacting you loads before, and also loads after with the promise of another booking that never materialises.....there'll be those turning up half an hour early or late without warning, not realising how both are a problem....... those who hang around when the times up, asking your name and getting moody when you don't tell them.... those who ask to meet for coffee and then getting moody and aggressive when you are polite but decline..... those who try to push your boundaries mid-booking.......

And then, then there is one in the fifteen who is polite, reasonable, fun to spend time with, understands how the transaction works, turns up on time, stays no longer than 5 or ten minutes over, (and you don't even mind that they have), brings a bottle of wine or leaves an extra twenty, and comes again in a few weeks.

You have to deal with the other 14 on the phone and by emails on a daily basis to find this odd one (in the meantime making sporadic dosh from those out of the 5 annoying ones who, despite being irritating as feckery for a multitude of reasons, do actually turn up and pay.)

The first example you gave, although I would have sent a far more blunt text (i.e. I am not a sex chat up line, and also busy at the moment. I will be in touch just before the booking as arranged") I would have probably cancelled if he persisted after I had made myself this clear, especially if I was having a bad day.

The second one- I would have ignored him as you did. First text maybe said "sorry no face pics, you can see my face next time" and ignored him after that unless he booked again, but the second text, would have definitely DEFINITELY ignored because of the reasons you said, and then written him off for not understanding the most basic of client rules.

Sorry to go on for so long- but I know from previous posts all the trouble you have had with agencies and so am delighted for you that going indie is something you are trying out more, as I think you'll benefit so much more from it- and so would hate for you to get disheartened from all of this indie crap that needs sifting through in the beginning, and end up going back to the stupid agencies who seem to fail you so often.

xxx

I would've responded pretty much the same way as you did, Colette, except for being worried after. Sometimes it does seem like maybe you'll NEVER get a good client again, after a day full of odd blokes and texts, and I do sometimes despair for all of a minute until I remember that there really *are* enough good clients out there to keep us all going! And it always (touch wood, LOL) eventually turns out that a bunch of TWs are followed by a spate of polite men with maturity who know what they want and how to deal with escorts properly.

I'm not sure exactly what to do to get rid of silly prats permanently (if I did I'd make a zillion pounds selling the answer ) but I do think the best cure for the annoyance/stress of dealing with them is remembering how recently you /did/ have a good client (because I bet you have!) and how soon you'll probably have the next. Can't tell the future for sure but my work records show that a 'quiet period', annoying/scary as it might be at the time, never lasts more than two/three days.

I'm going off on a massive tangent about stuff that all WGs here know anyway so will stop before anyone dies of boredom! Just wanted to second those who said that you don't sound like you're being too harsh at all. If you feel infuriated by a potential client before you even meet, it's better to cancel (civilly, as you did) and ignore further texts than to risk smacking him one if he's super-annoying when you meet, too! Not every client is an essential client.

Me too - stuff like this drives me mad, but you will get it, and you get more used to it after a while.

 I have a 'Text messages will not be answered' bit on my site, but I agree that the ones who think that by making a booking you are signing the intervening time over to them drive me nuts, and the best thing to do is ignore them for as long as you can. If and when you eventually text back just tell him that you have had bookings all day and are surprised that he would not realise this - I wouldn't even bother doing that, although it isn't easy if you're wound up.

I would have done exactly what you did in terms of cancelling too - why on earth would you need to describe yourself when your photos are on the internet? Idiot.

If they start texting I'll just ask them to call.

America has become so perverted, its just the opposite here. I called 2 guys today, and they ask me to text them. If you start calling, they'll ask you to text them (through a text). You'd think its a lack of conversational abilities, but some are actually good conversationalist. I'm so over the whole text debate, its why I've blocked them on 2 pre-paid phones already. I was about to do it on my personal phone, but feared I'd lose contact of the little bit of social circle I already have  

Ive read everybodies replies with interest,god dealing with clients is a minefield isn't it? Maybye one of us should write an etiquette book for clients as to how they should act when making appointments with escorts.

Thing is that as soon as clients say annoying things like those two did my alarm bells start clanging and i start to strongly suspect I'm being taken for a ride. I have tried polite responses in the past to irritating questions and it hasn't worked. They will STILL keep asking me to 'make an exception' and send a face pic etc etc and i end up being driven barmy by them.

Yesterday i had a client cancel a booking by text 15 minutes before booking was due to start,he had already confirmed he was coming and i had turned away another appointment to see him. His cancelling text said that he was 'very sorry but nerves had gotton the better of him and he would ring me for another booking later in week' I therefore text back that although i appreciated his feelings of being nervous i did not wish him to contact me again for bookings as his actions had led to me loosing work and i would prefer not to deal with him in the future.

He didn't respond funnily enough i thought i was very polite as well!


With regards to text appointments,i actually find i get most of my genuine bookings either through text or email. I would say 9 times out of 10 people who ring me dont make bookings. I get the dreaded 'can i have some more details' and then the even more annoying 'i will ring back later'. Last week i made a booking via phone with a very polite sounding man who then later on proceeded to cancel the booking 20 mins before the appointment by text and not even offer an apology for doing so!

How do you deal with the annoying potential clients you don't want to see or talk too ? Do you outright tell them that you have no wish to see them or make excuses?

I save the numbers of all previously annoying clients (the names i am storing them under are getting very inventive) so if they ring or text from that number i can just ignore them. If its a new client and they ring and are rude/offensive etc i will just tell them I'm not available that day,if they ring back at a later date and are acting in the same way they will get the same story again and they usually get the message. Offensive or irritating texts are best just totally ignored, i think a response is what these guys are praying for so its best not to give them the satisfaction.