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Author Topic: Cosmopolitan article on sex surrogates  (Read 8076 times)

Julia

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Cosmopolitan article on sex surrogates
« on: 16 April 2007, 06:29:09 pm »
Hi,

I really hope no one minds me posting on here.

I wondered if anyone in this forum would be interested in being featured in an article I'm working on for Cosmopolitan magazine.

I'm aiming to write a sensitive piece dealing, in the first person, with the experiences of two people, a man and a woman, who work as sex surrogates, helping clients overcome sexual problems. Hopefully it'll be a good opportunity for someone involved in sexual surrogacy to bust a few misconceptions and to speak out about what a rewarding occupation it can be.
 
I'm really looking for people of a similar age to the typical readers of the magazine - so early twenties to late thirties. It would be ideal if they worked in conjunction with a relationship therapist or had some training in relationship therapy. And they'd also need to be happy for the magazine to photograph them for the piece.

If you think you'd be suitable and you're interested in being profiled in Cosmopolitan, could you please drop me an email telling me a bit about yourself along with a photo?

Thanks,
Julia

julia@juliabuckley.co.uk

SJ

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Re: Cosmopolitan article on sex surrogates
« Reply #1 on: 16 April 2007, 10:29:12 pm »
Hi and happy for you to post.

I'm not sure you will find many takers though as us working girls tend to be sceptical of media portrayal and protective over our privacy.

I look forward to reading the article though. Please come back and let us know when its published.

Thanks

Richard

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Re: Cosmopolitan article on sex surrogates
« Reply #2 on: 17 April 2007, 05:59:15 pm »
Some of this has been pointed out (extracts from an email sent about a fortnight ago to her below). A friend said that, while the media are happy to agonise in print about exploitation of sex workers, they're also happy to exploit us themselves... Perhaps there should be a piece on the main site about media requests?

"For me, the two big issues are a) the photo and b) the question of payment.

"Privacy is a huge issue, both for sex workers and their clients. You may find someone willing to be photographed in this context, but it's not something I'd ever suggest someone do without a great deal of thought. It's not just them you'd be outing, but everyone connected to them, professionally or privately.

"I've long thought that people who are wanted in such media requests should only give their time and expertise freely when the journalist, editor, and manager of the newspaper / magazine / programme do :)"

Louise

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Re: Cosmopolitan article on sex surrogates
« Reply #3 on: 17 April 2007, 09:10:46 pm »
very interesting thoughts richard and i agree with you
also me thinks that it may take a lot of the persons time who has decided to help and could in theory interfere with her(or his) business
a lot of people who do this job (and i do stress that this occupation is a job) like to stay annoynomous and wouldnt fancy a 2 page spread in cosmo ....hence they dont show faces on websites
i do hope your venture goes well

dont know how you will get on though
good idea about the media requests though ;)

SJ

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Re: Cosmopolitan article on sex surrogates
« Reply #4 on: 18 April 2007, 09:11:33 am »
Some of this has been pointed out (extracts from an email sent about a fortnight ago to her below). A friend said that, while the media are happy to agonise in print about exploitation of sex workers, they're also happy to exploit us themselves... Perhaps there should be a piece on the main site about media requests?

"For me, the two big issues are a) the photo and b) the question of payment.

"Privacy is a huge issue, both for sex workers and their clients. You may find someone willing to be photographed in this context, but it's not something I'd ever suggest someone do without a great deal of thought. It's not just them you'd be outing, but everyone connected to them, professionally or privately.

"I've long thought that people who are wanted in such media requests should only give their time and expertise freely when the journalist, editor, and manager of the newspaper / magazine / programme do :)"


Good idea. We will get something written up to give peeps a bit of food for thought.

This sort of issue came up on one of the forums a while ago when an ex working girl tried to move into mainstream acting/modelling. On one of her first assignments she wore the same outfit for which she had posed in for photos on her escorting website where she had shown her face.  There was a long discussion about the rights and wrongs of all sorts but the general concensus seemed to be that once you have done this job, you have to accept that it always has the potential to follow you. Ladies commented that they would like to do programmes such as 'Who wants to be a Millionare' but accepted that they couldn't because of the potential outing consequences to those nearest and dearest and also their clients. Its a shame that it is that way, but it is.

I've known of a couple of ladies who thought they would enjoy the exposure from media interviews but the reality was awful for them and their families and they wish they had not participated. Hindsight is a wonderful thing. 

Julia

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Re: Cosmopolitan article on sex surrogates
« Reply #5 on: 26 August 2007, 04:00:35 pm »
Hi everyone,
Sorry, I?ve only just seen the replies to my post or I would?ve come back sooner.

The feature appeared in the August issue of Cosmopolitan and I?m happy to say that both the escorts who took part in it where pleased with the finished article. If anyone missed it and would like to see it drop me an email and I?ll send you a scan of it.

It wasn?t my intention to exploit anyone, merely to offer an opportunity to speak out. I can totally understand why people would be wary though, and I too would advise caution when speaking to the press. Having said that, I think articles like my Cosmo one can help sex workers to be seen by readers a more positive light, so it?d be shame if it became impossible for journalists, like me, who are trying to produce positive articles were unable to do so.

Sometimes magazines offer fees to interviewees, but some have a policy of not offering anything because they don?t want to get into cheque-book journalism (or because they?re stingy if you want to be cynical!). There?s not much someone like me can do about this, but I feel it can often be better to find people who are keen to speak out or promote their cause, than to coax them with a cash inducement into an interview they wouldn?t otherwise do.

The interviews took very little of the participants? time ? about 30 mins, one over the phone and the other at  a time a place specified by them. So hopefully they didn?t lose any business as a result.

This was a really interesting and enlightening article to work on and, I?m delighted to say, so far I?ve had universally positive feedback, so I do hope this will show some of you that not all journalists are bad!  :)

I hope to write more articles which show sex workers as people who readers can relate to, so do please get in touch if this is something that interests you and we can discuss the options.

Or, if you just need some general advice about speaking to the media, feel free to drop me an email and I?ll help if I can.

Julia

SJ

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Re: Cosmopolitan article on sex surrogates
« Reply #6 on: 26 August 2007, 05:36:38 pm »
Hi and thanks for coming back to us Julia - was this the article with Ariana Chevallier and/or Anika Mae?

I'd love a scan of it if poss as I missed it.

Thanks

Julia

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Re: Cosmopolitan article on sex surrogates
« Reply #7 on: 27 August 2007, 10:08:29 am »
Hi,
It was Ariana Chevalier and Chris Student. I'll email it to you now...
J

Anika Mae

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Re: Cosmopolitan article on sex surrogates
« Reply #8 on: 27 August 2007, 01:59:51 pm »
It wasn't the one I appeared in. I was most definitely not happy with the way I was treated or the quality of the journalism in general, and it lowered my already low opinion of Cosmo.

Richard

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Re: Cosmopolitan article on sex surrogates
« Reply #9 on: 07 September 2007, 08:57:54 pm »
When was that one?

Anika Mae

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Re: Cosmopolitan article on sex surrogates
« Reply #10 on: 07 September 2007, 10:29:41 pm »
July. It went around the boards a bit, I posted about it in my blog.

aging hooker

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Re: Cosmopolitan article on sex surrogates
« Reply #11 on: 10 September 2007, 06:15:50 am »
Julia if you have such confidence in your article why not just cut and paste into this forum now that issue is off the shelves and let us judge for ourselves.

Beth
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