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Author Topic: Dating a Client  (Read 1644 times)

Rosefleur24

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Dating a Client
« on: 19 March 2021, 09:43:04 pm »
Hey Everyone!

I’ve been escorting for several years now and I’ve met good looking clients this isn’t a first but I’m in a pickle and want some advice on if I’ve made the best decision.

Here goes...last year I had a booking an outcall to a young guys flat, he was my age and my type
of guy that go for, obviously given the situation I didn’t think anything of it then how nice to get paid to be with this guy for an hour...several months passed and he booked me this week. We had a great time and he said afterwards he was really bummed we had met this way, and I said me too.
He asked if I would go on a date with him and I said no because of the escort thing, my view being if
a guy knows this side it will be thrown back in my face further down the line, I just didn’t see anything serious being able to form from this. Anyway he sent me several messages the following day and convinced me to come over for dinner, so I did and I said this isn’t a booking we are hanging out..anyway we had sex as we both knew we would. Here is where the lines have blurred, it obviously wasn’t a booking and the rest of the week he messaged me really nice things but also always with a sexual tone. He wanted to see me again this weekend to which I decided it was best to leave things, I said this to him and was like I couldn’t be sure he isn’t just a good
Looking guy trying to get an escort for free and he argued it was me that didn’t want to pursue or date. Anyway I just said I think it’s to blurred as ultimately there is no outcome and at least before I was getting paid. I’m quite sad as I felt a really strong connection with him but I know the situation is messed up and it wouldn’t have been a long term thing and I also couldn’t trust if he generally liked me
Or was trying his luck.

Would you have done the same? I think I’m going to see if he try’s to chase further this week but now it ended he said he would respect my wishes if I didn’t want to hang anymore. But part of me thinks
If he wants to see me so bad he could just book? Thoughts?

Miffy

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Re: Dating a Client
« Reply #1 on: 20 March 2021, 03:49:08 am »
Not quite sure what his looks have to do with it, a client is a client. He might genuinely like you, or he might just be looking for free sex. Who knows.

You say you have a good connection with him. What does that mean? Usually, when we fancy someone, our feelings make us certain it's a 'connection' when it is often just lust. You say the lines have been blurred. Yes, they have, because he did not pay you for your time.

As an escort, you know that money ensures everyone knows where the lines are. However, the line has well and truly been crossed. 'Don't shit where you eat' as the saying goes.

If he wanted to see you again, yes, he could book. But, given you've already had sex with him for free, what is to say he is not going to manipulate the fact you have feelings for him into giving him a freebie? This is telling:

Quote
he messaged me really nice things but also always with a sexual tone

Personally I would just block him and not give this any further thought; it is the best thing to do.

This is just my opinion though, others might feel differently.

Jessiegirl

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Re: Dating a Client
« Reply #2 on: 20 March 2021, 08:27:27 am »
It seems pretty obvious he is after free sex and just using you in my opinion. I have great connections with a lot of my clients and great sex too but i have never accepted any dates from them. I get asked out a lot.

Also giving him free sex after just one booking I bet he couldn't believe his luck.

ana30

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Re: Dating a Client
« Reply #3 on: 20 March 2021, 08:49:10 am »
Here is where the lines have blurred, it obviously wasn’t a booking and the rest of the week he messaged me really nice things but also always with a sexual tone. He wanted to see me again this weekend to which I decided it was best to leave things, I said this to him and was like I couldn’t be sure he isn’t just a good
Looking guy trying to get an escort for free

He wants a free shag. He wants to fuck for free because it's great for his ego. He obviously likes you and finds you hot. I believe you showed a lot of restrain here and did what was right. Kuddos. This might have been fun at the begining but it was not going to end well because it was based on sex only and sounds like he just wanted to add to his curriculum "shagging an escort for free". If he really liked you he would have met you on a non sexual date to get to know you.
« Last Edit: 20 March 2021, 01:58:14 pm by ana30 »
Mornings were made for sleeping, wild sex and bacon.

Petlover29

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Re: Dating a Client
« Reply #4 on: 20 March 2021, 09:13:54 am »
He wants a free shag. He wants you to fuck him for free because it's nice for his ego. He obviously likes you and finds you hot. I believe you showed a lot of restrain here and did what was right. Kuddos. This might have been fun at the begining but it was not going to work out because it was based on sex only and sounds like he just wanted add to his list of experiences "shagging an escort for free". If he really liked you he would have met you on a non sexual date to get to know you.

Hey
I agree with ana.. if he says he wants to just hang out that means free sex.. as he has had it free already , he will expect it free all the time when you go to see him next.. even if he doesn’t expect a free service  it will just be awakard situation for you and him knowing he got the free sex off you.. I would simply block him as these types of men can become  mentally draining..

 I have been there myself in the past, they just see it as a free bang with a escort who is good at sex.. all you be giving him is an ego boost.. he will be feeling on top of the world..  I would save your energy for the paying clients.. i did the same situation once a good few years back when I was new to escorting.. it ended badly  for me as the awful man went  on to put how he got it free of me on one of them punting forums.. he was boasting about it... it really upset me as I felt so used.. it left me in a vulnerable   situation after he was blabbing what he did for (free) all over punting forums..

Just be careful in this game I have grown to learn nothing should be given free.. strictly business

Xx
« Last Edit: 20 March 2021, 09:19:17 am by Petlover29 »

Petlover29

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Re: Dating a Client
« Reply #5 on: 20 March 2021, 09:15:01 am »
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Petlover29

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Re: Dating a Client
« Reply #6 on: 20 March 2021, 09:18:26 am »

Zandie

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Re: Dating a Client
« Reply #7 on: 20 March 2021, 12:37:47 pm »
In my opinion I think he is taking advantage ...if you really have "feelings" for him I would not see him again, as others have said and i agree it will end badly.

If you can control your feelings, i wouldnt lose out on money ( not in these times). I would reply any further messages with "how long do you want to book for?"
so he knows its back to business.

I have given it for free not for feelings but because the client paid for 2hrs and was done in 30mins and didnt want a refund, so I offered a free booking next time.

He booked for his freebie a month later and still brought wine, flowers and perfume. When he tried to book 2 weeks later with soppy talk i asked how long and he understood it was back to business as usual.


TrueVoice

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Re: Dating a Client
« Reply #8 on: 20 March 2021, 01:29:12 pm »
Hi
Just give you my opinion but you may think it is hard:
When he will have enough to fish in the same hole,he will date somebody else, and you you will be miserable.

Be careful,people who pay for sex usually are not capable to be responsible for their relationship that is the reason why they pay,they don t want to be involved.

 Some want to abuse that is why they ask you for free.
 Only consenting victims fall in their trap. You have to distinguish job from personal.

 He will make you very sad and you will end up losing punters as you will become emotionally distress. I can t judge for you and you are an adult but I give you my experience and views.

Best of luck,be wise ,don t listen too much on your emotional side in that business, only count your dollars!!!.

English Green

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Re: Dating a Client
« Reply #9 on: 20 March 2021, 01:38:31 pm »
I find if you start seeing a client and they have no problem with you carrying on doing sex work or say i don't mind it turns me on and want to know details of sex you have with a client that is a big no no for me.

He might genuinely like you it's hard to say as none of us know him but if you say your happy to hand out but no sex as want to get to know you for a while lets see if he is fine with that?

fallen angel

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Re: Dating a Client
« Reply #10 on: 20 March 2021, 02:13:27 pm »


He might genuinely like you it's hard to say as none of us know him but if you say your happy to hand out but no sex as want to get to know you for a while lets see if he is fine with that?

Precisely this ^^  To me hanging out means spending time together with no expectation or obligation of anything sexual.
If he genuinely likes you he will be happy to do this for a few weeks but you will have to show restraint and not give into sex during this time even though you fancy him.
Personally it sounds to me like he is taking advantage now that he knows you fancy him and is just after the free sex but would be interesting to see how long he sticks around if sex is taken off the agenda for a while.

Jessiegirl

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Re: Dating a Client
« Reply #11 on: 20 March 2021, 04:05:31 pm »
It's a good point about him post on punter websites as this could damage your business.

When I was a newbie i used to see a guy i was very keen on and said I would give him a massive discount. He then boasted about it on a website and got loads of complaints from some of my regulars wanting the same.

Rosefleur24

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Re: Dating a Client
« Reply #12 on: 20 March 2021, 05:55:02 pm »
Hi All,

Thanks so much for all your reply’s!

First of I shouldn’t have made the post about him being good looking, i want to make it clear I’ve had attractive clients and I have great connections with all my clients regardless if they have Adonis looks.
I felt we had a good connection on an intellectual level but perhaps I was blinded by love (read 6ft3 frame). 
I should have had restraint and seen if he was happy just hanging with sex off the agenda, as that would have definitely shown whether he was interested in me or not, but agreed I think he was trying his luck. Last time I spoke with him, I told him that I wanted to leave it and if he wanted to see me again it would have to be a booking, so i guess if he books again will be telling. Perhaps lockdown has made me more desperate a connection, but regardless I’ve learnt my lesson even though this is the first time I’ve done something like this, I’ve been in the industry for six years so you’d think I’d know better! If by some miracle he books me again or turns up in a limousine and climbs up my fire escape (sorry terrible pretty women reference), I will keep you up to date and send invites to the wedding. But realistically I think I won’t get a booking from him again, and will just have to take this as a lesson not blur business and pleasure. Thank you again, it’s been reassuring to have all of your input! Xxxx

Snow Whitest

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Re: Dating a Client
« Reply #13 on: 20 March 2021, 06:23:51 pm »
I've learnt the hard way, twice, not even just the once! A client is a client, is a client. Never. Ever. Again  :FF
“Before you diagnose yourself with depression or low self-esteem, first make sure that you are not, in fact, just surrounded by arseholes.” Sigmund Freud”