See also the main SAAFE.info site for more Support And Advice For Escorts

Author Topic: being propositioned in a bar  (Read 3775 times)

Cass

  • Full Member
  • ***
  • Posts: 105
being propositioned in a bar
« on: 15 February 2013, 09:56:29 pm »
I've never looked for business in bars so I'm a bit out of my depth with this one. I'm passing through London (not working) and while waiting for a sleeper train (late on friday night) I'm in a bar and got chatting to an older guy.  We were talking for about an hour actually and I had told him that I was waiting for the train, eventually he asks how much it would cost if I were to go back tomorrow & he would pay. Its worth mentioning that I wasn't flirting in the slightest, there was just something in the way he asked which made me think he was asking for a rate, so I told him. He then said he wouldn't earn that in a month (btw my rates are not that high!)He did seem keen to bargain though & didn't look shocked.
So I'm now thinking that;
A) I read the situation completely wrong and the poor guy was just looking for a one night stand
B) I'm not worth my rates
C) I read the situation completely wrong and the poor guy was just chatting!

Is it usual for guys looking for escorts in bars to ask for a price in a round-a-bout way? Or have I just made a complete hash of a social situation & embarrassed us both?

Nobody Interesting

  • Sr. Member
  • ****
  • Posts: 513
Re: being propositioned in a bar
« Reply #1 on: 15 February 2013, 10:00:48 pm »
Hi,

It seemed he was asking. If he has not used an escort before he would no doubt feel it was a huge amount, though of course he may have known damn well what the price is.

I really would not worry yourself or feel awkward about it. Seriously.

As for not being worth your rates....that is being daft xxx

Holly x
Someone's been a bad girl

Cass

  • Full Member
  • ***
  • Posts: 105
Re: being propositioned in a bar
« Reply #2 on: 15 February 2013, 11:18:06 pm »
Thanks Holly, you're quite right, I am being daft! With hindsight when I'm not working I should behave exactly like I'm not working I suppose & not give out rates, even when I think they're asking!

Nobody Interesting

  • Sr. Member
  • ****
  • Posts: 513
Re: being propositioned in a bar
« Reply #3 on: 15 February 2013, 11:33:51 pm »
Hi,

Only daft regarding thinking you are not worth your rates!

I do not know, I would have no doubt gone along with the conversation as you did. I believe there are more than a few members who used to work the bars! I'm too much of a wimp though and could not tout for biz! But would I be tempted by a random offer of biz, despite doing no safety checks? Probably! Would that be wise? Probably not!

xxx
Someone's been a bad girl

ana30

  • Sr. Member
  • ****
  • Posts: 3,702
Re: being propositioned in a bar
« Reply #4 on: 15 February 2013, 11:37:31 pm »
Quote
We were talking for about an hour actually and I had told him that I was waiting for the train, eventually he asks how much it would cost if I were to go back tomorrow & he would pay.

Hi Cass,
I find that a veeeery awkward question -specially because you said you were not flirting the slightest-. Had I been in your shoes i would have played dumb, and asked him: "I'm sorry,but  I'm not understanding, what exactly are you asking and what cost are you refering too?" and let him explain himself before assuming "anything"  ;) As you say he may just wanted to continue talking to you as he was enjoying your company/convesration, or maybe he wanted a free one night stand or maybe he was propositioning or maybe...god knows...
"Sex work is real work, being a landlord isn't" - Graffitti seen on a wall.

Jan10

  • Sr. Member
  • ****
  • Posts: 499
Re: being propositioned in a bar
« Reply #5 on: 16 February 2013, 12:23:22 pm »
Just because there was a misunderstanding it doesn't mean you are not worth what you charge.Some men are happy to pay for sex some aren't don't worry about it. It's suprising how if you play it calmly you can end up being paid more or slightly less if you let them do the most talking rather than you tell them what you charge,especially if you act shocked at them suggesting they will pay you for sex they seem to like that.
Hello nice to meet you :)

TeenKylie

  • Guest
Re: being propositioned in a bar
« Reply #6 on: 16 February 2013, 08:17:33 pm »
Well I don't know why he would think it was too high unless it was something like 5k then that obviously would be quite extortionate.

Lady_Lust_XXX

  • Sr. Member
  • ****
  • Posts: 6,700
  • 'nil carborundum illegitimi'
Re: being propositioned in a bar
« Reply #7 on: 16 February 2013, 08:33:58 pm »

Is it usual for guys looking for escorts in bars to ask for a price in a round-a-bout way? Or have I just made a complete hash of a social situation & embarrassed us both?

I think it is quite a normal thing Cass though I wouldnt give it a second thought.  You obviously feel you are worth what you charge or you wouldnt charge it.  If he thought it was too expensive, that was his problem.  Maybe he thought he was in for a cheap night or a freebie.  You saved yourself the grief of that, so I wouldnt worry.

When Im touring I go out for meals on my own a lot and get chatting to guys and get propositioned but I would never take them up on it, once Im out for the night Im out, Im not going back with anyone for a shag. 
Beauty is nothing to do with having a pretty face.
It is about having a pretty mind, a pretty heart,
And most importantly a beautiful soul.

Rooby

  • Sr. Member
  • ****
  • Posts: 737
Re: being propositioned in a bar
« Reply #8 on: 17 February 2013, 12:18:16 am »
I suspect he knew exactly what he was doing, and he would have looked shocked at how 'high' your rates were even if you'd offered full service overnight for a tenner. Like you said, he was keen to bargain...

Forget him babe, all your other Clients prove you are worth what you charge!
R xx

Lady_Lust_XXX

  • Sr. Member
  • ****
  • Posts: 6,700
  • 'nil carborundum illegitimi'
Re: being propositioned in a bar
« Reply #9 on: 17 February 2013, 10:22:51 am »
I've never looked for business in bars so I'm a bit out of my depth with this one. I'm passing through London (not working) and while waiting for a sleeper train (late on friday night) I'm in a bar and got chatting to an older guy. We were talking for about an hour actually and I had told him that I was waiting for the train, eventually he asks how much it would cost if I were to go back tomorrow & he would pay. Its worth mentioning that I wasn't flirting in the slightest, there was just something in the way he asked which made me think he was asking for a rate, so I told him. He then said he wouldn't earn that in a month (btw my rates are not that high!)He did seem keen to bargain though & didn't look shocked.
So I'm now thinking that;
A) I read the situation completely wrong and the poor guy was just looking for a one night stand
B) I'm not worth my rates
C) I read the situation completely wrong and the poor guy was just chatting!

Is it usual for guys looking for escorts in bars to ask for a price in a round-a-bout way? Or have I just made a complete hash of a social situation & embarrassed us both?


Just a thought Cass re the bit in red.  Perhaps he didnt realise you were an escort and was meaning that he would pay for your transport home the next day.  On re reading your post it does come over like that.  Just a thought though.
Beauty is nothing to do with having a pretty face.
It is about having a pretty mind, a pretty heart,
And most importantly a beautiful soul.

Sav

  • Full Member
  • ***
  • Posts: 160
Re: being propositioned in a bar
« Reply #10 on: 17 February 2013, 12:48:06 pm »
I read it as Lady Lust has mentioned. He probably didn't know or think you were an escort.

Roxychu

  • Guest
Re: being propositioned in a bar
« Reply #11 on: 19 February 2013, 06:07:32 pm »
If he was just expecting to pay for transport then it's fair dos you mistook him for a client, any man who expects something for buying a drink or paying a taxi isn't someone you'd want to sleep on a non work basis. It's fine if someone wants to buy you a drink or you them to be nice, but if they make something sexual about exchange, then they've moved from flirting to purchasing in which case they should be browsing adult-work and doing things in an honest way. Sorry it really gets up my tree when people try and make you feel obligated to sleep with them. I never understand it like they think buying a drink for you will make you guilted into sleeping with them, surely they'd rather you came to that conclusion by yourself.

Lady_Lust_XXX

  • Sr. Member
  • ****
  • Posts: 6,700
  • 'nil carborundum illegitimi'
Re: being propositioned in a bar
« Reply #12 on: 19 February 2013, 06:12:08 pm »
If he was just expecting to pay for transport then it's fair dos you mistook him for a client, any man who expects something for buying a drink or paying a taxi isn't someone you'd want to sleep on a non work basis. It's fine if someone wants to buy you a drink or you them to be nice, but if they make something sexual about exchange, then they've moved from flirting to purchasing in which case they should be browsing adult-work and doing things in an honest way. Sorry it really gets up my tree when people try and make you feel obligated to sleep with them. I never understand it like they think buying a drink for you will make you guilted into sleeping with them, surely they'd rather you came to that conclusion by yourself.


Roxy, unfortunately there are so many cheap, shallow and dillusional guys out there. 

Look at all the girls that give out each weekend behind the back of a club/pub just because they are bladdered. 

It makes paying clients look quite normal ... even when they are not.  :(
Beauty is nothing to do with having a pretty face.
It is about having a pretty mind, a pretty heart,
And most importantly a beautiful soul.