SAAFE forum
General Category => Questions and Answers => Topic started by: JenJen001 on 02 November 2016, 01:47:52 am
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Hi everyone. I'm just looking for some honest advice really!
I've been considering escorting for years but have never had the courage to just go for it.
I'm worried about not being able to have control over the clients I saw. I expect that the majority are pretty undesirable but I couldn't see dirty or really fat men or someone really creepy...like some of the stories on here! But you only know once you're there right?! I couldn't just go through with it and never see them again, I'd literally have to walk away there and then. And I'm worried that could turn nasty.
The only way I can think of avoid this is to meet with clients in a public place first? Does this sound very realistic? What does everyone else do?
I think maybe I'm looking to do this on my terms which I feel is how it should be but I not sure how realistic that is!
Thanks all
Jen
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I'd be amazed if any/many clients would be willing to meet in a public place.
I screen fairly heavily via phone, and am selective about who I see. I can honestly say that in getting on for 2.5 years I've only had a handful of clients I found physically objectionable, and far more who were lovely in different ways.
I think the only way you could really suss them out beforehand is if you did out-calls to hotels and arranged to meet them in the lobby, but you wouldn't be very popular if you said you'd changed your mind.
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To be honest escorting is most likely not for you, if you place that much importance on appearance. I prefer cleanliness to whether they are fat or ugly. They are all human beings who deserve respect and not your condemnation. Also the ugly guys treat you way better than the I am hot and fit lot.I know I may sound harsh but you cant refuse a booking on the grounds of someone's appearance, if you want to get any work that is lol. And of course clients will be fed up, it has cost them time and money to get to you to be rejected.
I have met many ugly men in my time and I remind myself that they are paying for a service and that everyone I see has some redeeming qualities. Okay I refuse to kiss some if its that bad but your going to have to decide if escorting is for you if you feel that strongly about the matter
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Thanks all. I didn't say anything about ugly men....just very fat or dirty or creepy!
I think its just something I don't know how I'd deal with until I'm in the situation.
Thanks anyway
Jen
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I agree with curvywench in that you need to be sure escorting is something you can do, I believe many women would like to become escorts because of the money and freedom but find it difficult to overcome their aversion to shagging a physically (to them) unattractive man. I think you have to be a certain type of woman to become a good escort where you more value their personality, manners, warmth, gratefulness, generosity, honesty, vulnerability etc.
Fat/old clients are still clients and some of the best Ive had and the vast majority of them are lovely and they deserve the same respect they give me. On the other hand fit handsome younger guys often have a self entitled aura and an ego that need feeding and that I find very unattractive, I much prefer a lovely mild mannered polite fat/thin/ugly/older/lumpy bumpy punter who is gracious and kind.
In the same way you can't be a nurse if you balk at the sight of blood you cant be a good prossie and maintain a stable mental state if sleeping with fat/old/ugly (to you) punters for money is something you find repulsive.
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. I expect that the majority are pretty undesirable but I couldn't see dirty or really fat men or someone really creepy...like some of the stories on here!
The only way I can think of avoid this is to meet with clients in a public place first? Does this sound very realistic? What does everyone else do?
I think maybe I'm looking to do this on my terms which I feel is how it should be but I not sure how realistic that is!
Thanks all
Jen
Your perceived idea of clients is probably very much way off the mark. The examples of smelly or weird men you read about on here are a drop in the ocean compared with the number of lovely clean and respectful clients we meet. Meeting in a public place may seem a good idea to you but think of it, you meet as agreed (if you even got a man to say yes to that) then you think no you do not want to take it further. He thinks you have wasted his time and may cause a scene and embarrass you.
There really is only one way to establish if you are cut out for this work and that is to see a few clients, I can not imagine any other method of putting your mind at rest over this one.
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I agree with Curvywench and Helen - it's the young attractive ones who have the worst attitudes IME.
I'm gonna sound like a hippy here, but part of the job (to me) is seeing through the external factors and finding the client's inner beauty. I have a lovely regular who is very obese and unattractive, but he is a lovely, kind and generous person and really interesting to talk to. He's also really good at oral ;D
Maybe a better route for you might be a sugar daddy arrangement? It's more like dating in that you can suss each other out first before committing to anything. It obviously pays much less than escorting but you can physically screen clients beforehand. If you google "lets talk sugar" you'll get a website with lots of helpful info.
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I was going to suggest the SA site.
You can't be fussy as an escort, after all you are providing a service, it's not funtime for you! I know some escorts put on their profiles that they won't see really obese men, but I'm sure that probably puts some clients who aren't obese off. Quite honestly, I'm 25 and before this I had never slept with anyone more than a couple of years older than me. I have been pleasantly surprised! I really enjoy the company of my older clients, some of them are fantastic at oral and quite honestly, the 40+ guys in my experience seem to know how to treat a woman well and are genuinely really nice!
I think you shouldn't be an escort though if you can't find different types of people attractive. I'm very highly sexed and I don't have a narrow definition of beauty, I think there's only been one or two clients that I couldn't find anything attractive about physically, they are the ones you just do an inward sigh and still give them the best time you can because that's professionalism and remind yourself that this job is very highly paid for a reason and it can't always be sunshine and rainbows. But there are so many really lovely guys out there, inside and out, that will require your services and remind you of what exactly you love about this job. It's not for everyone but it is definately for me.
Lack of cleanliness however - that's a different matter. I make every guy go and freshen up beforehand unless I can tell they are fresh out the shower (and most of them are, they don't want to waste their time during a booking), any guy that refuses, I'm not shy about telling them that they smell or offering to clean them. There's only been one bad experience I have had that way.
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I have to agree that this line of work probably isn't for you.
I mean as has been said the majority of clients are lovely, although they might not be attractive, but they tend to be the best clients.
For dirty clients, well we are well within our rights to not provide the service if they don't go and get washed when asked.
For extremely obese men, you could put something on your ad saying you don't see them, but most dont read ads in full and it probably wouldn't make you look good.
As for creepy clients well that is why you speak to them on the phone before accepting any bookings, you can usually get a good idea by how someone comes across on the phone. If they turn overly creepy during a booking you stop what your doing and tell them not to do that, if they keep doing it you get up and get dressed and stop the booking there and then.
I mean don't get me wrong I do have on my ad that I will only see those between 25 & 65, that I won't see anyone who can't speak or understand fluent English, that I won't see anyone who has an extremely wide body frame, or anyone with either a micro penis or a huge whopper.
Age is because I only do outcalls and found that everyone that was under 25 seemed to either live with parents, or a bunch of flatmates, over 65, personally nothing against them just found they were the ones that would constantly make appointments then forget.
Speaking/Understanding English well that is pretty self explanatory.
Extremely wide body frames (fat or muscle doesn't matter), I don't have a personal aversion to them (being on the big side myself it would be a bit two faced of me), but being 5" 5 I find it very difficult to find positions that don't end up killing me for hours later.
Micro penises/whoopers I just find really difficult to do anything with and don't feel I can provide a good service for the client.
So as you you can see while I do have people I don't see they are not based on my personal preferences but whether or not I can provide a good service to them
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Hi everyone. I'm just looking for some honest advice really!
I've been considering escorting for years but have never had the courage to just go for it.
I'm worried about not being able to have control over the clients I saw. I expect that the majority are pretty undesirable but I couldn't see dirty or really fat men or someone really creepy...like some of the stories on here! But you only know once you're there right?! I couldn't just go through with it and never see them again, I'd literally have to walk away there and then. And I'm worried that could turn nasty.
The only way I can think of avoid this is to meet with clients in a public place first? Does this sound very realistic? What does everyone else do?
I think maybe I'm looking to do this on my terms which I feel is how it should be but I not sure how realistic that is!
Thanks all
Jen
No client is gonna agree to meet you in public so you can decide if they're normal enough, also it wouldn't work if they did agree you'd never be able to plan your bookings/day properly. Go sit in a pub and look at the men in there and seriously ask yourself if you can imagine sucking their dicks if it's really that repugnant of a thought you're not hooker material
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I will disagree on not being allowed to be fussy - we can be as fussy as we like. I turn away clients that others would take. I avoid seeing disabled clients because I have some stupid phobias (that extend to myself. I broke my arm and couldn't look at my own arm until it was in a cast and I never did look at my x-rays.) I don't like to see very elderly clients and will avoid them when I can. If there were a way to avoid the ones I find physically repulsive, I would. Luckily, it's very rare for someone to actually repulse me and the few times one has walked through my door, I have just gritted my teeth and bore it. I would love to screen out the morbidly obese but there's no graceful way to do it. A couple have asked on the phone and I've declined. But if they show up, I deal with it as professionally as possible.
But I am fine with all races and I quite enjoy the young ones (when you're an old, assertive Amazon like me they don't take the piss too much - I find them easier to manage than 55-year-old middle-class white men.) We are all individuals.
But, to specifically address the OP: there's no way to screen for looks in general. Like others have said, you have to look for the good in people. I find a wide variety of men attractive. Christopher Walken, Willem Defoe, Benecio Del Toro, Danny Trejo, Steve Buscemi... these are all "ugly" men and I find them all hot as fuck!
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I'm worried about not being able to have control over the clients I saw. I expect that the majority are pretty undesirable but I couldn't see dirty or really fat men or someone really creepy...like some of the stories on here! But you only know once you're there right?! I couldn't just go through with it and never see them again, I'd literally have to walk away there and then. And I'm worried that could turn nasty.
Hiya
I think when you get going all you'll end up worrying about is whether the client is reliable, friendly, respectful and clean. The weight probably won't bother you :D when you look at them, the ??? will jolt up in your eyes like one of those old fashioned tills.Ka ching!
In relation to creepy men, well, I think you can tell a lot chatting to a man on the phone beforehand and...in relation to dirty men, I have never met one to be totally honest. I've found most adult men to be conscious of their hygiene. I am low key though and have probably been lucky. Wait for it, the next one I see will be a dirty bastard.
xx
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You have to be prepared for who is going to book you. They may be unattractive, they may be fat, they may be really good looking. But regardless of their looks you have to give them a good service providing they are clean and respectful. If you can't do that this isn't for you and I think the advice to try SA is a good one.
I've been booked by very obese men and yes it can be uncomfortable especially with positions but most have been really nice guys. The same with the unattractive ones, I've had some guys I have though "how the hell am I going to go through this" but I have done it. I agree you can tell a lot by chatting to a man on the phone and screening him that way. It works mostly for me!
I also agree you can be fussy in this job. I am and I can afford to be. I hhave a couple restrictions which I didn't have when I started but now do and my experience is much better than it was before.
Try SA, even though there are equally unattractive and creepy men on there you can get away with asking for a picture or just meeting up in a public place to decide if you can go through with it! X
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Choosing clients? :FF As some are aware on here i do not see asians and do very well each week but its rather unrealistic to ask to meet a punter 1st to see if you 'can' see him, infact its rather bonkers
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Choosing clients? :FF As some are aware on here i do not see asians and do very well each week but its rather unrealistic to ask to meet a punter 1st to see if you 'can' see him, infact its rather bonkers
It reminds me about those look and go clients is the way they play. If the Op is very nervous about escorting re clients i will advise not to do. Ever since escorting it has opened my eyes to another world. So approach with caution having a hard think about this because once those memories are made they can't be erased instantly or never ever.
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Well you can do things on your terms. It's your body and you need to find a way to work which is comfortable for you.
If you don't see overweight clients perhaps you can put a disclaimer and you can always insist that everyone who meets you has a wash before they get started and if they fail to then it's completely up to you whether or not you kick them out. And always keep your phone close when meeting clients/have a buddy so that if you want a client to leave and it turns nasty you can call
but the majority of clients are not undesirable, they're just normal looking men with good hygiene and they're nice enough. Looks won't ever come into. Weight only comes into it if they're obese or they're fat in such a way it affects you being able to actually shag them
The majority of the time we're on here we talk about bad clients more than good clients. Its just the way things are in the world but the bad clients that are on here are not representative of ALL clients. Don't let us scare you/give you an impression of clients that isn't true. I can honestly count on one hand the number of creepy/smelly clients I've had but I do moan about the bad ones a lot.
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Doing this job isn't an easy thing to do, you need to remember you are being paid though this is a job and sometimes doing work there are things you don't enjoy it's not all having sex with men you find attractive (though sometimes there are some nice surprises!) and you have to be able to get into work mode where doing the booking takes priority over your own feelings about how they look, I've had sex with lots of guys I wouldn't ever consider dating in real life but they pay well and they are just normal nice people so it's easy really, the ones you have to worry about are the idiots and time wasters you encounter I've had one scary encounter but for the most part I've avoided anything too bad, guys who are fat or not good looking are the least of my problems.
If you're not a people person, can't enjoy the company of different kinds of people and be able to push through spending time with people you aren't attracted to while acting like you are enjoying yourself then it's probably not something you should do, it can be mentally draining even if you can handle it and have enthusiasm for what you do. Remember you are being paid to provide a fantasy to your client it's not really supposed to revolve around your own tastes.
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A great piece of advice I've read here is to go into a bar and look around. See if you can have sex with everyone there. If you can't imagine doing it with 80% of the men there, then escorting wouldn't be right for you
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It is weird when you first start out. I remember it well. Does take a while to get used to having sex with strangers who you wouldn't look twice at in the street. We're not programmed to screw guys we're not attracted to are we.
I still have flinching sessions afterwards sometimes, especially if I see a guy in the street when I'm not working, & I think he may call me when I'm back at work.
The creepy ones, I find, will generally let something slip before they arrive. If they don't & do something offensive when they arrive then just tell them to leave. With the smelly, if they turn up & refuse to wash then ask them to leave. Obese guys will sometimes say on the phone "I'm a larger guy". I find the overweight guys are really respectful & quite shy types who are easily pleased. Don't recall having a bad one.The smelly ones I'll avoid, just wont see again. Sometimes they come out of the shower & still smell. Pheromones or something. Get some Badger balm for under your nose. :P
You can put whatever you like on your adverts. I've read some women wanting a photo before they'll see someone. (Hopefully they'll not send not send a dick pic :P)
I put watsapp on my work phone to see what guys look like.
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Undesireable?
Clients come in all shapes, sizes and looks.
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Thanks everyone you've all been so helpful, I couldn't have asked for more genuine honest answers!