I tried searching the boards but couldn't find anything specific. Sorry if that's due to my useless forum skills!

How often does this happen to you ladies?

I 'only' ever met a few clients when I had just turned 18. Big mistake for me - I was too young and naive. Escorting (or whatever you wish to call it) was definitely not right for me at the time so I didn't pursue it any further.

One of those clients asked me for my real name. I never thought I'd be asked that question! (Naivety right there).

I don't understand the psychology behind it... I wish I could. Why on Earth do you think he asked for my real name? I realise there could be a number of possibilities and my first thought is he just wanted to feel 'extra special' by knowing if that makes any sense. I don't believe he intended to do anything malicious with my personal information but I also don't believe he was genuinely called John - I never asked though!

I didn't give him my real name but did tell him my middle name instead. I was put on the spot and it was literally the only name that would of rolled off my tongue effectively.

Anyway, I'm depriving myself of sex at the moment. It's been a couple years since I escorted but still, all I fantasise about is older men... I'm a lot more confident now so it's most definitely the best moonlighting option for me. Oh and getting told 'your gorgeous', having sex and receiving money for it isn't bad either! (Don't worry I'm not deluded I know I may will most probably come across some unsavoury characters/dangerous people).

But I can't help dreading that question. Of course I can give someone a 'real false name' should they ask, but I am a terrible liar and I hate being put on the spot. I know it's probably not the best profession to be in if you can't tell a little 'white lie' or two but I thought there were certain unwritten rules that common sense determined and not asking for real names was one of them. Of course AdultWork isn't exactly the land of common sense...

I wish that man had respected I chose a 'working name' because that's what I wanted to be called. If I had wanted him to call me by my 'real name' I would of asked him to.

Anyway ladies, how often are you asked this question and how do you deal with it?

If I had known said client for a while, if I was sure I wanted to continue escorting, if I was quite certain of his intentions I wouldn't of had such a problem with it. But it was only the 3rd time we had met and he said 'now that we know each other a little better why don't you tell me your real name?'. 

Sorry, I don't want to rant too much (I realise I'm heading that way) but shortly after this meeting I decided it wasn't for me. This client started to email me referring to me by my middle name, while I continued to reply with my working name. He still called himself John (this, to me, is the most/only amusing part of the 'name situation') and didn't take the hint that I would prefer to be called '***'.

So yes, how often have you been asked this question? Would you consider them to be 'crossing the boundaries' (unless you'd known them for quite a while, built up mutual trust, both knew the real name of each other)? If it wasn't someone you consider a regular would you just give them a false name and think nothing of it? Would you refuse to see them again? I literally ended up 'quitting' after that email correspondence.

I have a lot of questions I know, I'm sorry. I just wonder how often you're asked this as I generally just don't want to be asked for/called by my 'real name'. It's not a common name and besides the fact people will think I'm joking/lying anyway - I've never really liked it.

Thank you lovely ladies,

WAWW x

What she said.

I do sometimes tell clients my real name - but that's because I've seen them a number of times, feel comfortable with them, and say... you can call me (Hadley) if you like. I would never give my real name out to someone that asked for it - that's just weird and creepy. Why would someone insist on getting that kind of detail from you? It's not right.

I would also add that my real name is a very common one, and my location is a large anonymous city. So for me, there's a limit to the real harm anyone could do just by knowing my very popular first name.

But in your situation... I would definitely say that you should come up with a fake first name - your middle name is fine if it's not what you're commonly known by. Practice it... you've learned to respond to your work name and you can do that, so learn to believably give your fake name as your real name. You're not doing anything wrong... it's important to protect your identity. The only person doing anything wrong is the client pressing you for your real name in the first place.

Alternatively of course you can just say you don't give your real name out, but that risks the client feeing alienated / rejected, and possibly maybe not booking again if they're the sensitive sort.

Anyway, good luck and let us know what you decide to do!

 

I have rehearsed my fake real name as much as the working name although when I first started I did blurt out my real name in conversation a couple of times when giving anecdotes. 

Omg tell me about it, thank spagbol I only have done that with the good ones

Quote from: happyhappyjoyjoy on 08 January 2014, 11:47:12 pm

I have rehearsed my fake real name as much as the working name although when I first started I did blurt out my real name in conversation a couple of times when giving anecdotes. 

Omg tell me about it, thank spagbol I only have done that with the good ones

Haha, I did this with one of my first ever clients (nerves I think..) and he bloody added me on FB!

EVEN WORSE than that, we had friends in common!!! I could have died lol I deleted my facebook for months

xx

Some of my regulars know my real name. The reason being that if they are overheard greeting me then that immediately flags in peoples minds if the name is different to your real one. It's a difficult one, because I have had to stop seeing a couple of guys that do know my name. I don't tell anyone that asks though. That flags to me as invasive and is sometimes a good reason to stop seeing someone who is like that.

It's not just clients who can be unhealthily interested in this. Two escorts I know fell out when one tried to discover the other's 'real' name by some very naughty method.

I gave a few a fake real name (in my early days).   They kept insisting and were regulars so in the end I gave them whatever came out of my head! 

Funny thing is one of them said to me, oh yes, that really suits you...........

I wouldn't do that anymore though and still get those that want to know but I refuse.  I am not me when I am working, I am the other woman and hate the thought of people trying to invade my personal life. 

The annoying thing is that one client kept telling me other girls' real names - whether they were real or not I don't know - but it was like he felt he had some sort of exclusive membership to a club and was almost smug about it..... he's probably going around bleating my supposed real name too!  I just wish now I had not even given him that as I sort of feel he got one over me in a sense, and if that makes sense? 

The other one is are you married?  To which I say, I may be I may not, what difference does it make...............

You won't believe the nonsense I have been asked recently, it beggars belief but it's a long boring story on another thread soon! 

Stay safe and good ladies.

Jenny