SAAFE forum
General Category => Questions and Answers => Topic started by: StockingFillerXL on 24 May 2019, 04:05:36 pm
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Hey all, I wanted to know if anyone works from home for incalls? Is it a good or bad idea/experience?
I’ve been having a really tough time with anxiety the last few weeks to the point that I’m afraid to work and no longer want to do outcalls.
Initially I didn’t want to do incalls to my home out of fear for the safety of myself and my son, but now I’m so riddled with anxiety, that I feel that working comfort of my own home will be best for me...
Thoughts please ladies x
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Personally working from my own home would fill me with way more anxiety. Fear for the safety of my own possessions and space invasion. Clients knowing where you are all the time. No thanks.
Hotels work perfectly for me. Usually. Have you tried hotels before ?
Hope you feel more yourself soon x anxiety kicks my arse too. X
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I worked from home for a long time and it was less anxiety-making than paying out for hotels all the time. I had my regs. I had my routine of "Park here, OK I see you, walk across the road." I knew where everything was - my exit route, my totally legal hairspray into his eyes, my asshole cat who would totally claw the shit out of him.
I made sure anything personal was hidden away. I had a cleaner once a week to make sure everything looked nice.
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I've worked at home, then mostly outcalls with occasional hotel incalls, now I have a second property to which I can accept a few incalls.
When I worked incalls at home I never thought I'd ever have a separate place, or bother with many outcalls. When I made the change due to personal circumstances and opportunities, stopped incalls from home and moved I noticed a huge sense of relief. Some of this was security always checking, and constantly picking up things conscious of the next incall bookings.
Now I have a separate incall place some of the old anxiety has returned, however it's not as bad and I don't find either worse or better than the other. There are pros and cons to all ways of working. What I have found is that time running the separate incall maintenance, setting up, cleaning up afterwards can often be as much as travelling to an outcall and returning.
So definitely swings and roundabouts in my experience.
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I've worked from home throughout .I've turned down callers who I felt were really distrespecful weird or just making me feel uncomfortable.
I don't want them in my home .
I've not had stalkers yet with my current profile .
It is very useful as often I'm struggling financially and can't afford to tour .
I can understand people's anxieties about possible outcomes i.e. problem clients
It's not all bad ...
I won't do outcalls as I feel too worried about what could go wrong
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I couldn't really do this job without working from home, because I fit in the odd booking around my civvy job. I'd hate to tour and I wouldn't fancy being out-call only, so it works for me. In 4.5 years, I've only ever had a couple of nutters and one turning up unannounced.
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I couldn't really do this job without working from home, because I fit in the odd booking around my civvy job. I'd hate to tour and I wouldn't fancy being out-call only, so it works for me. In 4.5 years, I've only ever had a couple of nutters and one turning up unannounced.
How did you manage those rare situations, Kay?
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How did you manage those rare situations, Kay?
They weren't too bad, and I managed to get rid of them fairly easily, though one (a young lad with learning disabilities) did make a tiny bit of a scene at my front door on the way out. The other was one of the Islamist nutters who was targeting escorts around London a couple of years ago - he asked for a pen to pay by cheque but luckily left and just sent me a couple of abusive texts afterwards. The bloke who turned up unannounced actually did it twice. He was a wrong 'un as he also tried for CIM (knowing I don't do it) in both his bookings (the first was arranged normally). The first time I let him in and did a quickie booking, the second time I told him to fuck off and how inappropriate it was to turn up out of the blue - which I'd also said the previous time. ::)
I wouldn't downplay the risks of working from home, but as said, I couldn't really do otherwise, and I've found the few times I've worked from hotels remarkably stressful, especially if you get a no show after telling someone which hotel you're in, or even worse, your room number. I couldn't hack that regularly.
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Anxiety affects people in different ways. For me personally I wouldnt feel comfy working from my 'safe space' but then there are others who suffer with mental health and feel less anxious working in their safe space because they are at home and know where everything is.
The only way you're going to truly know what works best for you is if you test the waters. Trial it for a week to a month and see how you feel ie if it makes you feel more or less anxious. All the best x
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I work from home, and also have anxiety, and depression.
If I can't work one day due to this, I'm not losing money which I love.
I'm not sure I'd do it if I had a child here though.
I have my workroom and my bedroom so the spaces are separate and when I finish work, I can just shut the door until my next appointment.
It works really well for me.
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It can be less expenses and decide to work at last minute plus convenience of luxuries at home.
But also if you get found out could be a nightmare from neighbours you cannot escape it unless you move and if you get robbed by robbers which happens a lot all over UK they probably would take all possessions of value that might not be in hotel like all your jewelry, all laptops, game consoles anything they want and the robbers will then know where you live.
Also you say you live with your son if he is of a young age that would not be considered a good idea to do incalls there stalkers and weirdos have been known to come back with no appointment at strange times. If he is older and knows what you do then that it different.
Think very carefully of all potential situations that could happen.
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doing incall since years in my place and i got anxiety in the past! now it is gone! depend why you get anxiety! ask why!
always done fine! still a bit stressed but the good one! i think that every one has! (opinion)
do not overthink, screening well and have fun! for me was just mindset and i was too slim! but it is personal!
when you are a bit fat ahah you overcome stress better!
:D
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My mate has an alarm system and CCTV set up throughout her house and outside the front door.
You can make the cameras not so visible but she chose to make her CCTV very obvious to put off potential bad behaviour.
It didn't cost the earth. I think it's well worth it.
She also has heavy 'Japanese' folding partitions...to cut off access to corridors or views of the rest of the flat.
I have two and they discourage nosey parkerness.
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I have also been suffering with some anxiety recently and have made the decision to move in a few months to a new flat which I can also work from regularly :). I have a lot of friends who do the same and prefer it that way! it's certainly worth a try :) xxx
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doing incall since years in my place and i got anxiety in the past! now it is gone! depend why you get anxiety! ask why!
always done fine! still a bit stressed but the good one! i think that every one has! (opinion)
do not overthink, screening well and have fun! for me was just mindset and i was too slim! but it is personal!
when you are a bit fat ahah you overcome stress better!
:D
What has being fat or slim got to do with stress/anxiety?
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I work from home, and also have anxiety, and depression.
If I can't work one day due to this, I'm not losing money which I love.
I'm not sure I'd do it if I had a child here though.
I have my workroom and my bedroom so the spaces are separate and when I finish work, I can just shut the door until my next appointment.
It works really well for me.
Yes, me too! The battle of anxiety and depression is real 😩 I imagine it would be best for me to work from my comfort zone x
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Thank you all so much for the advice, I’ve deffo taken everything into consideration and I’m veering more towards working from home, so think as suggested, I’ll trial it for a week and see how it goes.
My son is a teen and knows everything as I’m extremely open with him.
CCTV is a great idea, will def look into getting something gor my peace of mind.
Thank you all ❤️
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It can be less expenses and decide to work at last minute plus convenience of luxuries at home.
But also if you get found out could be a nightmare from neighbours you cannot escape it unless you move and if you get robbed by robbers which happens a lot all over UK they probably would take all possessions of value that might not be in hotel like all your jewelry, all laptops, game consoles anything they want and the robbers will then know where you live.
Also you say you live with your son if he is of a young age that would not be considered a good idea to do incalls there stalkers and weirdos have been known to come back with no appointment at strange times. If he is older and knows what you do then that it different.
Think very carefully of all potential situations that could happen.
This lady makes a very good point. I have worked from home for 2 years only once has it happened but I had a guy who I had seen before show up as he "lost my number" (even though he found me on aw) anyway my clients know I only play during school hours for obvious reasons. Well he showed up at 4pm when in shed getting washing and my 6 year old answered door ( he knows he's not spose to). Luckily he had a Clio board and made it look like he was trying to sell me something but I did not appreciate it. I prefer to work from home as I feel safer and don't want to worry about hotel finding out and kicking me out and trying to go for fags. Or the anxiety of having to do a booking just to pay for room before any profit. I would advise against cctv unless you can really hide it. You won't have any clients seeing you if they see cctv except the ones that don't mind advertising publicly what they are doing. And then they will put a warning on [a punting forum] to say you have cctv then you'll be black listed by everybody! Also may I ask how you want about being that open with your son as it's something I will have to approach in years to come if I'm still at it
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Just my experience. I worked from a building on which we installed a prominent CCTV over the door.
We also had a feed inside other private areas where we could observe the clients entering and leaving.
No clients ever mentioned it, were bothered or ran away off. Most of these guys were very prominent people who you would think would be shit scared off, by being identified on film. But no, they couldn't give a piss.
The only person who objected was a known, convicted criminal and escort beater who we didn't let in.