SAAFE forum
General Category => Questions and Answers => Topic started by: Savanna on 16 July 2007, 09:41:18 pm
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Hi all,
I am a 49yr old married woman who is considering escorting as an alternative to the 8 to 5 routine, where i work like a slave for very little return in money or gratitude!
My husband and i have been on the swinging scene for about 5 yrs, and both he and i know my appetite for sex is more than he can satisfy, but this doesn't frighten or worry him as he enjoys our time together, and also seeing me with other partners, male and female. We are both very happy and comfortable with our sexual needs and we have discussed the idea of escort work on many occasions.
But..... realisticaly i wonder if i have anything to offer that will attract clients esp when i see the lovey girls on the UK Belles website.
My husband says i look very very sexy and although a BBW, size 16/18, that that shouldn't deter me. I believe he is right in what he says as i never have any probs finding sexy and attractive swinging partners who always want to meet regularly.
I have read the articles on the SAAFE site and was v surprised to find how normal and sensible the girls seemed to be and i know this may sound silly but how normal too, leading an alternative lifestyle in terms of their work but having a typical homelife.
I would like to try it out and i do have my husbands full support, which i know is genuine.
I am open to advice from wiser people, who i hope to find on this site......please offer any advice you think appropriate.
Looking forward to hearing from you all
xxxxx
Paulacat
Oxford area
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Hiya Paula and welcome
of course you have something to offer being a BBW There is a wonderful website www.prettybigescorts.com
that only lists ladies of size 14 or over ,i have been veiwing my stats on my website and after punterlink it is the most popular site for clients to find me ,so there really is a huge (no pun intended) for the more rubenesque lady
there are also a hell of a lot of ladies that escort and also are swingers as well
I am not that far way from you (swindon) so if you need any advice or help please feel free to give me a call or drop me an email or pm via here the best peice of advice I can give you is get a good website done ...it doesnt have to cost ???? and then get listed on some directories , you can also do a free one yourself but some directories wont list free websites ,there is a link via saafe for some website designers ,I can also reccomend a good female webmistress
hope this helps
Lou XXX
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For any attribute you can think of, there is always someone 'better' that clients could chose.
Fortunately, clients are sufficiently numerous and diverse in their tastes that there is (almost) always someone who will chose you, and you fit into one particularly popular niche.
I think that the biggest difference between swinging and escorting is the expectation that money brings. Single men tend to be grateful just to 'score' at a swinging event, and you get to chose them. Clients will moan, in online reviews, about anything and everything, and they get to chose you.
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Hi again
Thanks to both Louise and Richard for your responses, i have taken a look at the prettybigescorts.com website, and have been very pleasantly surprised.
Louise, do you think from your experience, escorting could provide me with a viable financial alternative to the 8-5 routine. I would be happy to send pics to you for your opinion and guidance, they would be the sort of thing i might include on my site, i am very happy to take any advice you can give.
Also, regarding the production of a website i will contact you soon for contact details if all goes well.
Richard, thanks for your comments also, you have a very valid point to make, but we have survived some rather horrendous swinging experiences also, when things didn't turn out as advertised, but understand what you are saying, i can be overly sensitive sometimes about my figure. I suppose you do have to develope a thick skin.
xxx
Savanna
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hiya savanna :)it can provide you with a good income , one of the main reason that i do escort is finacial and also the flexability that it can bring , i dont work every day if i fancy a day off ..i have one :o)in what job can you do that..lol
if you want to send me the pics then drop them into louise38dd@btinternet.com
there is a market for everyone in this biz and most people have a ball doing it ,the main downside is the timewasters
but you soon get to know the signs ;)
let me know how you get on
XXX
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Louise, I have sent pics.
Look fwd to more advice and opinions from you and any one else who looks at this topic, want as many views as i can get before taking the plunge....... but have just spoken with my hubby and feel very positive about taking things further. ;D
Thanks
Savanna
xxx
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You can certainly make a living from escorting. It's not hard to get enough clients, especially if you offer incalls. If I were you I'd ease into it, though. Try a few evening and/or weekend bookings before taking the plunge and quitting your day job.
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Hiya just got your email and ive replied :)
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How much you can earn depends on so many things that there's no easy answer to the question and you also don't say how much a 'living' is for you.
Many people considering doing the work multiply an hourly rate by say 40 and think they'll make that much per week. Alas, it doesn't quite work like that - and not many people could cope if it did.
It can also vary a lot from week to week or month to month. This is where having more than one source of income coming in to the home can be very useful.
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Hi again,
and thank you to all so far who have offered advice.
I am surprised by how much more i have realised i need to know.
I am trying to find out what setting up my site will cost and how best to arrange things at home, where i initialy hope to work from. am i being silly to ask is there a particular way to organise things if you use your own home. We have a spare double beroom which i intend to use for entertaining clients. Are there things i need to consider about how to situate things and what i should have to hand apart from the obvious (condoms and wipes).
Also, the biggest question of all how do you identify the good from the bad with just a phone call to go on?
Please keep the advice coming, i know i shall need it!
Thanks
xxx
Savanna
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how best to arrange things at home, where i initialy hope to work from.
Think very, very carefully before working at home and have a read of http://www.saafe.info/main/index.php?topic=14.0 (http://www.saafe.info/main/index.php?topic=14.0) in particular for some things to think about.
what i should have to hand apart from the obvious (condoms and wipes).
Non-scented condom safe lube? (Similarly, non-scented shower goodies in there.) Toys? Panic alarm? Hidden mobile phone on silent?
Also, the biggest question of all how do you identify the good from the bad with just a phone call to go on?
To an extent, practice. There's some advice on what to ask for (e.g. a landline phone number) elsewhere here I think, and if they mess you about on the phone you can reckon they'll be worse in person. Plus if they ask about your services in great detail, it's a wank call, even if you can't hear the 'fap fap' noises...
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Thanks to SW5,
I looked at the link, read the articles and have just had my plans turned totaly upside down!
That is not to say i shall not work from home, but that i have just learned a great number of valuable things about the do's and dont's of how to go about it.
Truth is that i intend to try eves and w/ends only to start off with and my hubby does know my plans and will be at home to look out for me if probs occur. Regarding neighbours, well, not unusual these days but no one realy takes any interest in anyone else.
But everything else i read and couldn't come up with an answer for i now need to think further about.
Any ideas you can give me about website costs would be v much appreciated....
xxx
Savanna
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Hi Savanna,
Just a few things I can think of before getting started. You need to have your set boundaries ie what services you are willing to offer your clients, will you want to do OWO (oral without a condom) or would you prefer CO (covered oral) CIM (come in mouth) or not, anal watersports etc etc, you obviously know what you would be comfortable with and don't ever feel pressurised into offering something you are not comfortable with.
Some ladies choose to list their "services" on their sites, others don't.
You will need to think about what sort of photographs you want to use to portray yourself, will you want full on nudity, topless etc or more subtle sexiness, either way the guys know what is on offer and all have their different preferences, I would imagine that if you had full on more gynaecological style pics that you would tend to have more "wank" timewaster calls.
A very important consideration is whether you will be showing your face or not in your photographs. If you are unsure then keep your face out of the pics, as once you release your pics onto the www you can guarantee that someone somewhere will store them for posterity. Not showing your face does NOT lose you business.
Your room where you entertain gents can be made as elaborate as you like but along with the obvious things that you mention having to hand, condoms, wipes, massage oils, you would need to consider whether you would want to use toys on clients, if so what would you need ... ie strap ons, cock rings etc etc, not a priority but something to consider. I personally think ambience is important, lighting, candles, smells plus having music quietly playing. You would need to consider whether you would want to begin the "date" with time sitting on your sofa in your sitting room, would you want to incorporate this in a booking, or maybe you would prefer to take them straight to the boudoir if you are uncomfortable with them seeing your personal effects ie family pics etc (these can obviously be hidden though). You will need extra towels, bed linen etc along with unscented shower gels etc .. thats another thing, shower or bath facilites should always be available for your gents.
It all boils down to what you feel comfortable with in the long run, and if you are comfortable your gents will be too.
I initially started out with outcalls only`to get a feel of things and then progressed to incalls.
Sorry rambling away here ... hope everything goes well for you.
Jx
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Thanks to SW5,
I looked at the link, read the articles and have just had my plans turned totaly upside down!
That is not to say i shall not work from home, but that i have just learned a great number of valuable things about the do's and dont's of how to go about it.
Truth is that i intend to try eves and w/ends only to start off with and my hubby does know my plans and will be at home to look out for me if probs occur. Regarding neighbours, well, not unusual these days but no one realy takes any interest in anyone else.
But everything else i read and couldn't come up with an answer for i now need to think further about.
Any ideas you can give me about website costs would be v much appreciated....
xxx
Savanna
Oops sorry I must have been writing my previous post to you while you added your one!
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Regarding neighbours, well, not unusual these days but no one realy takes any interest in anyone else.
While it is true that neighbours can be amused at hearing sounds of passion and go, 'There they are with another couple again...' they tend to be less amused if they find out there's money involved. Prostitution = street work = drugs, as we all know :)
So if someone turns up on the neighbour's doorstep with a bottle of sparkling white wine, going 'Hello, I'm the guy from the swingers site', they'll typically sigh and point them to your house. If someone turns up going, 'Hello, I'm here for the "massage", I've got the cash..." there's a risk they'll call the police. Not only do most of the public think the above, they also think it's illegal.
Any ideas you can give me about website costs would be v much appreciated....
We're into 'how long is a piece of string' territory here. To register a .co.uk domain costs about ?3 a year. You can get free webspace in a variety of places, or pay 'not much' for some. Several great sites are done by the people themselves. Of the people who post here, I can see that Anika Mae, Richard and (I think) Beth fall into that category to pick three, for example.
Or you can pay a pile of money to someone to do it for you. How large a pile of money varies. Sometimes, they'll even do a good job... Just make sure a) you are the person who's listed as registering the domain and b) you can move the site elsewhere if they're rubbish.
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To Louise, Richard, Anika Mae, and SW5,
Thanks to each of you for taking an interest and providing me with some very important advice.
I am going to try and set up a site for myself over the next week or so, or however long it takes and then start off with incalls but only on eves and w/ends.
Dependent on what happens and how much success or lack of it I have then, well who knows.
It might sound silly to you all, but it may be something you may have felt at the outset.........my worst worry is that no one will get in touch, and i won't find any clients.......
My husband thinks that's highly unlikely and frequently explains, as best he can, how men work. He believes a friendly face, open personality and just a suggestion of something, naughty, erotic, but potentialy wild sexualy will beat even the most beautiful girl in the world who can't engage with another person and is distant and cold. His words.
I think he's right but i am also wise enough to know life doesn't follow any rules or guidelines......
I will be looking for a buddy if all goes well, so let me know if you are interested, i live in the oxford area so someone not too far would be best i suppose......just a thought..... does any of you girls want a "work experience" trainee?
Not sure if that last thought was a joke or a genuinely good idea, whatever let me know ;)
xxxx
Savanna
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im not too far away ..I will buddy you ...if you like ?
xx
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I am fairly new to this but I have got lots of guys using adultwork. People slag it off but I think it is a great web-site. It is totally free and you can easily remove yourself for a few days if u want too. Plus some guys have profiles on there so you get to know a bit about them.
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I have got lots of guys using adultwork. People slag it off but I think it is a great web-site.
Ah, I was right. It doesn't matter if it generates lots of work, if it's work you hate doing. (Or rather it does matter, but in a bad way.)
If you are to continue, you can think 'what sort of clients do I want?' Then think 'where would they look for me?' It's probably not AW.
AW has a number of problems, but if I were an abuser, I'd certainly use it. That's one of the problems, of course, how easy it makes it to find vulnerable workers. There's also a definite encouragement to be as down-market as possible. I have a profile on there, but it's written to be as off-putting to the sort of client I don't want as I can make it.
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hmmmm aw is not the best of websites (the bareback option is one reason i dont like it)
it may be free but it has (for me in the past) generated so many idiots and timewasters and potentually lost me money
you can allways set a free website (if you are going to continue)and put it on some sites get some good pics done ( no open wide shots as that can generate the wrong type of bussiness)
they dont have to be professional
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Adultwork is good for getting you attention when you're new, but you should be quite sure about what you're doing and how before you go there. A bit of a catch 22 I suppose, but you can get around it by talking to people with more experience. I don't get much contact from adultwork because of my rates (I used to offer an hour without full service quite cheaply and heard from loads of idiots then), but I've had some really good clients who found me through there. Some like it because of the extensive search facilities, for some it's just the first site they find.
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Hi
ive got to say i agree with Anika regarding AW , as it has also got me a lot of business ( yes a lot of timewasters too but ive worded my profile to deter them as best as i can without sounding too regimented and scaring off all my potentials!!) . I think in a lot of mens cases its just the first thing they find when searching for escorts online. I advertise in a few other places but i do ask my guys where they seen the ad and its adultwork 99% of the time !! X-work could be good as its free to advertise and has a no - bareback advert rule , as well as letting you keep a higher % of your credits if you wanted to cam ect, but just doesnt pull in the traffic !! Rare escorts is something else i set up for free , but ive not had much from this ( you can use your rare escort site to advertise on some punting forums ect though - a lot wont accept adultwork profiles!) , apart from that ive got a small ad on a local punters site which brings in a bit of business , but ive got to say most of my business is generated by AW. Most of the idiots and timewasters are filtered out at the phone/email stage and most guys are good clients despite AWs bad rep !!
To sum up , a lot of websites ( free ones anyway!!) just dont have the pulling power of AW , and it has got a lot of good features for both client and providers , if it didnt sit on the wrong side of the "tackniess" fence it would be so much better , but at the end of the day you do have full control over your ad/profile , so its up to you how to portray yourself !!
Good luck in your escort venture !!
Cleo XXX
Ps = To Savvana == yes theres lots of work for ladies 14/16 , im that size and dont have a prob getting bookings at all !! I also think its very true what your hubby said about guys wanting someone warm , freindly , understanding and sexual instead of a real model type who puts on an act and is in it for the money !!