This thread is a bit of an eye opener as it would seem that some people are perhaps not well suited to this job.
If your only differentiation between love and work is being paid for it then I think you are heading for trouble. Saying I'm not enjoying it I am being paid to do it so it is not helpful. Admittedly a majority of clients are not exactly a big turn on but what happens when you get the occasional hot guy who does make it enjoyable, are you then full of guilt afterward as you have crossed the line and enjoyed yourself ?
Does the sneaky climax you have with your vibrator while your boyfriend is away count as doing it for pleasure? How about looking at the hot guy in a magazine and saying 'oh yes, I would' is that wrong ? The fact is both of these things are done for your own pleasure but that doesn't make it wrong. You don't love your vibrator (well most of us don't) or they guy in the magazine. Using the same argument when you go out on a girls night out and have a great time, shouldn't you be having that good time with your boyfriend ? I don't think anyone would say you love him any less just because you have fun with the girls.
To do this job you have to be able to separate love from sex. Yes of corse sex is an intimate thing but it is an activity that both men and women can enjoy without attaching love to it. The very fact that people have to cheat is due to the way we have been conditioned in such a way (mainly due to historic religious influence) that sex is something that is exclusive. If you believe that sex is an exclusive activity between people who love each other then selling it doesn't change that. Weather you do it for pleasure or are paid for it if you have sex with someone who is not your partner it is still sex outside your relationship.
I don't see how you can be ok selling sex but not ok with people having recreational sex. Most of the men who come to see us don't have feelings for us they just enjoy sex. So what is the problem if your boyfriend wants to have sex with other people ? If you can't face the idea that your partner might like to have sex with someone else I think you are perhaps a little insecure. We expect them to be happy with us having sex with other men but can't cope with them doing the same, that is very one sided.
Where I would have a problem is with partner doing things in secret, be it having a secret bank account or cheating behind my back that would be a betrayal. Much better to be up front and honest. As a woman married for 20 years I might not be an expert but I can claim to have some experience in this matter. My husband and I still love each other as much as we ever did despite me doing this job, how can that be ?
1. We still make the effort we did when we were first dating, for example he still buys me flowers at random times not just on anniversaries. I got back from a weekend away the other day to find a loveheart sweet attached to the front door saying 'Forever yours', you get the idea.
2. We have an enormous amount of trust, he knows that even if the hottest guy of my dreams walks through the door as a client that I still love him. He accepts that sometimes I might enjoy myself and is happy about that. He is not worried that I will run off with the guy.
Perhaps there is also some realisation that we are both in our 40's and fairly average looking people so we both know we are not supermodels so neither of us would be hurt by the other saying he/she is pretty hot. In fact my husband has been known to say things along the lines of 'that poor guy being married to her' when he has met a stunning young woman. He says that the woman you would take home for the night and and a woman you could live with are two entirely different things. You could get away with taking home pretty much any woman as long as she looked nice but to live with someone you have to find them both physically and emotionally attractive, if she doesn't have the right personality it would be hell.
To do this job I really do think you have to be able to separate love and sex and have realistic expectations for your partner. I would let my husband have sex with someone for pleasure and he would let me do the same because we are confident about our relationship.
Topic: Do you find since you been a escort you have more trust issues with men? (Read 10592 times)