See also the main SAAFE.info site for more Support And Advice For Escorts

Author Topic: Motivation to escort  (Read 24265 times)

ResearchHER

  • Jr. Member
  • **
  • Posts: 11
Motivation to escort
« on: 27 January 2009, 10:00:14 am »
Hi,

What was the essential motivation for you, or someone you know, into becoming an escort?

Trafford

  • Sr. Member
  • ****
  • Posts: 293
Re: Motivation to escort
« Reply #1 on: 27 January 2009, 10:11:35 am »
What is your motivation for asking given you say you are not a journo, not wanting to become an escort and not an acedemic?

ResearchHER

  • Jr. Member
  • **
  • Posts: 11
Re: Motivation to escort
« Reply #2 on: 27 January 2009, 10:29:02 am »
Well my motivation for asking is that I have had thoughts of using an escort. However, the media tends to portray escorts as victims that are put to it not from choice, that suffer from violence, and use a drug or alcohol to cope with their suffering. So when I think of that, obviously I'd never use one.

But then I see independent escorts, I'm not sure how they operate to be honest, or how escort agencies operate. Maybe I am confusing escorting with street prostitution.

Trafford

  • Sr. Member
  • ****
  • Posts: 293
Re: Motivation to escort
« Reply #3 on: 27 January 2009, 10:46:51 am »
Fair dos.

Well the scene the media portrays does exist but it is no longer the biggest part of the market (it if ever was). There are no real offical figures on what is going on in the business but that doesn't stop the media making wild and unsubstantiated claims such as "80% of hookers are on drugs" or "95% of hookers dont have any other choice" or 75% of hookers were abused as children and are now pimped".

The internet has paved the way for a new brand of working girl. The sort of girl who loves sex or who can look at escorting in pretty much the same way as any job they may choose - a fun/interesting/OK way to earn money.

Lots of independents and agency and parlour girls do this as a part time 'hobby job' to earn a bit of extra cash in a fun and not too testing way. Many are mums who do it so they can earn a good salary without the long and unsociable hours associated with similarly well paid jobs - they prefer to see more of their children than the walls of an office. Some are students funding their way through university. Some are free spirits who dont want a 9 to 5. Some want the cash to send their children to private school and some just want the money to be able to regularly spend ?800 on a handbag.

The motivation is varied. Yes some are pimped or do it becasue their husband is a lazy so and so who doesn't want to work, some have drugs habits to fund (how many City boys are in the a similar position now that coke is such a popular drug?)  and some cant do anything else but if you do your reseach, read the reports on sites like punternet.com, read girls blogs to see what sort of person they come across as and keep an eye on forums then you can make an informed choice quite easily these days - most long time punters will say they have less bad punts these days as there is more information out there than ever before.


« Last Edit: 27 January 2009, 10:48:52 am by Trafford »

brandy@saafe

  • Guest
Re: Motivation to escort
« Reply #4 on: 27 January 2009, 02:47:24 pm »
Hi,

What was the essential motivation for you, or someone you know, into becoming an escort?

A serious question. How would knowing an escort's motivation, or someone they know, make up your mind whether or not you want to see one? I'd like to understand the thought process behind that question.

ResearchHER

  • Jr. Member
  • **
  • Posts: 11
Re: Motivation to escort
« Reply #5 on: 27 January 2009, 03:04:52 pm »
That is a good question.

If we take a look at the suggested motivations offered by Trafford:

- part time hobby for fun to earn cash
- mums to earn more money
- students to fund their learning
- to fund their child's learning
- to buy material goods that bring them joy
- to fund a drug habit
- forced

We can see that some do it for good ends, some do it for bad ends, and some do it without choice.

If I were to use an escort, I'd like it to be with a woman that does not do it regularly (less chance of getting STD) and does it temporarily (however long it takes to fund their learning for example) in order to obtain a good end.

I don't think I need to explain why I would not choose someone who is forced into it, which is such a horrendous thought and would be considered as rape. Nor would I choose to help a woman slowly destroy herself by using drugs. A woman should be free and clear minded, and voluntarily choose to accept a client.

I hope that answers your question.

If you two are escorts, why have you so far chosen not to reveal your motivation?

brandy@saafe

  • Guest
Re: Motivation to escort
« Reply #6 on: 27 January 2009, 03:22:45 pm »
That is a good question.

If we take a look at the suggested motivations offered by Trafford:

- part time hobby for fun to earn cash
- mums to earn more money
- students to fund their learning
- to fund their child's learning
- to buy material goods that bring them joy
- to fund a drug habit
- forced

We can see that some do it for good ends, some do it for bad ends, and some do it without choice.

If I were to use an escort, I'd like it to be with a woman that does not do it regularly (less chance of getting STD) and does it temporarily (however long it takes to fund their learning for example) in order to obtain a good end.

I don't think I need to explain why I would not choose someone who is forced into it, which is such a horrendous thought and would be considered as rape. Nor would I choose to help a woman slowly destroy herself by using drugs. A woman should be free and clear minded, and voluntarily choose to accept a client.

I hope that answers your question.

If you two are escorts, why have you so far chosen not to reveal your motivation?

Thanks for taking the time to explain. Of course you wouldn't want to see anybody that has been coerced into this job. The problem is, you're only going to find one kind of answer on here. Most of us are independents, with a couple of agency ladies thrown in for good measure. Our response to you would more or less be the same. Or we could even lie to you to tell you what you want to hear. How would you know otherwise? You don't.

This industry is made up of all different types of women, who all have different motivations and goals as listed by Trafford. There really is no one answer.

I'm motivated by meringue powder. I sniff it whenever I can. The ones from Marks and Spencer are the best. You get more to the pound too. Probably explains why I'm fat.

LondonEvie

  • Guest
Re: Motivation to escort
« Reply #7 on: 27 January 2009, 04:02:02 pm »

If I were to use an escort, I'd like it to be with a woman that does not do it regularly (less chance of getting STD) and does it temporarily (however long it takes to fund their learning for example) in order to obtain a good end.


In other words, you mean you want to see someone who is diligent and cautious with safer sex precautions and uses them with everyone, and you'd use safer sex methods too! Yes?  :)

ResearchHER

  • Jr. Member
  • **
  • Posts: 11
Re: Motivation to escort
« Reply #8 on: 27 January 2009, 04:38:51 pm »
Yes that is very important. But there could be a woman addicted to drugs that would fit that description, or even a coerced woman, and I wouldn't go with her.

ResearchHER

  • Jr. Member
  • **
  • Posts: 11
Re: Motivation to escort
« Reply #9 on: 27 January 2009, 04:55:11 pm »
That is a good question.

If we take a look at the suggested motivations offered by Trafford:

- part time hobby for fun to earn cash
- mums to earn more money
- students to fund their learning
- to fund their child's learning
- to buy material goods that bring them joy
- to fund a drug habit
- forced

We can see that some do it for good ends, some do it for bad ends, and some do it without choice.

If I were to use an escort, I'd like it to be with a woman that does not do it regularly (less chance of getting STD) and does it temporarily (however long it takes to fund their learning for example) in order to obtain a good end.

I don't think I need to explain why I would not choose someone who is forced into it, which is such a horrendous thought and would be considered as rape. Nor would I choose to help a woman slowly destroy herself by using drugs. A woman should be free and clear minded, and voluntarily choose to accept a client.

I hope that answers your question.

If you two are escorts, why have you so far chosen not to reveal your motivation?

Thanks for taking the time to explain. Of course you wouldn't want to see anybody that has been coerced into this job. The problem is, you're only going to find one kind of answer on here. Most of us are independents, with a couple of agency ladies thrown in for good measure. Our response to you would more or less be the same. Or we could even lie to you to tell you what you want to hear. How would you know otherwise? You don't.

This industry is made up of all different types of women, who all have different motivations and goals as listed by Trafford. There really is no one answer.

I'm motivated by meringue powder. I sniff it whenever I can. The ones from Marks and Spencer are the best. You get more to the pound too. Probably explains why I'm fat.

I assume this forum is anonymous and therefore no one knows your escort identity and real identity, therefore I don't understand why you would lie to me. Generally it could turn off clients if they knew you and you said "I do it for drugs" or "I am forced into it", but considering that nobody knows you I am unsure as to why you would lie or why everyone's response would be the same.

I can only conclude, based on your remark of "telling you what you want to hear", that the motivation is something bad, whether that is what you think is bad or what you think I think is bad.




Sasha

  • Full Member
  • ***
  • Posts: 101
Re: Motivation to escort
« Reply #10 on: 27 January 2009, 05:00:08 pm »
Yes that is very important. But there could be a woman addicted to drugs that would fit that description, or even a coerced woman, and I wouldn't go with her.

I guess that is always a risk? And since the government seem to be intent of pushing the industry further underground, there are no regulations on this kind of thing.

 But I would say it's pretty easy to to tell if a girl doesn't want to be there or not. Particularly if they have their own website and are independent. I'm not an indie, I'm an agency girl, funding my studies, and I'm 100% certain that none of the girls on my agency's books have drug problems, and absolutely non of them are coerced. I have no official statistics, but I think the chances of coming across someone like that would dramatically increase if said girl were a street worker.

I assume this forum is anonymous and therefore no one knows your escort identity and real identity, therefore I don't understand why you would lie to me

Some of the ladies have links to their sites on their saafe profiles. Also , some people may not want you to know, and that is their business, and doesn't necessarily mean they are crack whores.

LondonEvie

  • Guest
Re: Motivation to escort
« Reply #11 on: 27 January 2009, 05:06:24 pm »

I can only conclude, based on your remark of "telling you what you want to hear", that the motivation is something bad, whether that is what you think is bad or what you think I think is bad.


Well, some people might tell you what you want to hear. If you ask anyone why they do any work (Barring those who truly love their careers) they will say they are doing it for money. However this is a very personal and intimate service, and saying 'Because I like handbags, or because I am putting my kids through college' may make the individual paying feel like just a step on a ladder.  So you might then leave that part out. It doesn't make it a fib, it makes it tactful. Also, it is a stock answer because it's not really anyone's business why people do the work they do.

If someone asks me I will be honest and say it is because I am at school and I enjoy it, which is entirely true. If it was however that I was hypothetically, supporting an ill relative and the hours and money suited carrying for that person...Who wants to hear that?! I'd hate hearing that! So you might leave that bit out and say the hours and money suits you, and whats more you damn sure wouldn't want someone inquiring about that situation :) See what I mean?


Edit: Just seen sasha's post- And she is right. I've not yet heard of or seen anyone who has been coerced or have drug problems, and I'd be surprised at it too.  I have a Pastry and Ice Cream problem but we'll let Fitness first and my thighs worry about that one xx
« Last Edit: 27 January 2009, 05:10:03 pm by Evie »

Trafford

  • Sr. Member
  • ****
  • Posts: 293
Re: Motivation to escort
« Reply #12 on: 27 January 2009, 05:34:23 pm »
If you two are escorts, why have you so far chosen not to reveal your motivation?

You want to know mine? A lady I met asked if I'd like to work with her and I thought why not, it looked a lot of fun and the money was all extra as I already had a good full time job. It has paid for a lot of nice holidays for me and my family and I've met some great people. Not much to complain about here. Treat the job, and the clients, right and it treats you well in return.

brandy@saafe

  • Guest
Re: Motivation to escort
« Reply #13 on: 27 January 2009, 06:02:43 pm »

I can only conclude, based on your remark of "telling you what you want to hear", that the motivation is something bad, whether that is what you think is bad or what you think I think is bad.


Feel free. You're welcome to come to any conclusion you like.

amy

  • Administrator
  • Sr. Member
  • *****
  • Posts: 15,493
Re: Motivation to escort
« Reply #14 on: 27 January 2009, 06:13:22 pm »
You missed out an important one:

Some are free spirits who dont want a 9 to 5.

I am pretty much unemployable and loathe being told what to do and where to do it, particularly when it means lining somebodys else's pockets to take home a pittance. I work as a prostitute for the money, of course - just as I did when I worked in a supermarket, a factory and as a cleaner. Unlike those days however, I am now happy, successful, physically and mentally healthy and completely financially independent. I run a legitimate business which has taught me a wider-than-you-might-think variety of skills, which (aside from the obvious ones ;D) include photo editing, basic bookkeeping/accounting and advertising/marketing techiniques (in the writing of my website and blog, which I worked extremely hard on and am proud of, considering I have no qualifications as such, and only went to school for something to do when it was raining). I have also learnt more about human nature than most people get to do in a lifetime, and am heartened to say that the majority of my findings are good.

I work happily, willingly and completely independently, and am categorically not coerced, pimped, managed or in any way under duress. I am not in financial difficulty, addicted to any substance legal or illegal, nor am I a victim of physical or emotional abuse of any kind. I can choose when, and even if I work and have ample opportunities to spend time with my family and friends; I can afford to eat good fresh food and sleep properly each night. There are probably other jobs I could do but I do not intend to find out anytime soon - as far as I am concerned my clients are stuck with me until they nail me in my Y-shaped coffin, and that's a while off yet. I realise that I am in the minority, as my job is not a stopgap as such, but ladies like me do exist!

As far as STDs go, I did have one once - I was twenty two and caught chlamydia off a cheating boyfriend. I have had sex of various kinds with probably well over a thousand men since then and never caught a thing. A prostitute's sexual health is her livelihood - don't you think she will take the utmost care to protect it? And the number of times a woman (or man) has sex is completely irrelevant - I could have 10 clients a day five days a week, take precautions and not catch a thing, or I could go out, get pissed and shag a stranger once without a condom and catch half a dozen different STDs. It might help if you try to think of us as you would any other professional service provider, rather than relying on unsubstantiated media stereotypes.

Apart from anything else, if I was addicted to drugs or alcohol, what business is it of yours? There are plenty of alcoholic plumbers and housewives, drug addicted doctors and so on. I earn my money and will spend it as I see fit, and that includes sticking it down my neck, up my nose or in my arm if I choose to. Likewise bareback - I do not offer it as I believe the health risks to be more than I am prepared to take, but what others choose to do with their bodies is up to them. Whether we like it or not there is clearly demand, or it would not be offered - each participant's sexual health is their own responsibility and it is the individual's prerogative which services he or she chooses to avail themselves of or not.
« Last Edit: 27 January 2009, 06:21:14 pm by amy »