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Author Topic: Are you working to fund your studies or future career?  (Read 11466 times)

sadie x

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Re: Are you working to fund your studies or future career?
« Reply #30 on: 19 March 2012, 09:40:57 pm »
sorry :-X

amy

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Re: Are you working to fund your studies or future career?
« Reply #31 on: 19 March 2012, 09:53:33 pm »
sorry :-X

Sadie, you don't have to apologise :).

All I was basically saying was that if somebody posts a question here we can either answer it if it's relevant to us and we want to, or we can ignore it if it isn't and we don't. What I'm heartily sick of is the constant jumping on of the person who asked it for things which are nothing to do with that question.

At risk of going even further off topic, if it wasn't for the slack jawed, scabrous bottom feeders who lap this shite up, the media would have turned it's attentions elsewhere years ago. Laying all the blame at the door of the folk who are making a living by flogging it is like blaming Cadbury's because people have bad teeth.

sadie x

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Re: Are you working to fund your studies or future career?
« Reply #32 on: 19 March 2012, 10:11:58 pm »
I know everyone did kind of jump on the poor guy!i think people just get really caught up in the subject..
I have found it really intresting,I am new to any kind of forum like this..so probably found it fresh critism.
Iwould like you,probably be having a totally different view..if it become monotomas..

Cat_BBW

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Re: Are you working to fund your studies or future career?
« Reply #33 on: 19 March 2012, 11:04:11 pm »
In my other ('real life') job, I was asked if I was interested in being interviewed for a rag mag about my weight (I'm a BIG GAL). So I said yes, it was a paid piece, they were offering almost ?1,000 for a double page spread and photo shoot, GAWD YES I jumped at it...!!!

Then the journalist (or rather, his editor) moved the goalposts. They wanted a twist on the story, a different angle rather than "fat bird gets on with her life". They asked me if I would be happy with making the the story saying I was a fat pin-up girl, or a kissagram, or roly-poly stripper.....!!!

I turned it all down. I can lie/act/elaborate, but this was too far, I wasn't prepared to feed the hand that bites us...

Dani

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Re: Are you working to fund your studies or future career?
« Reply #34 on: 20 March 2012, 01:36:32 pm »
I have to agree with Amy on this one.  Most reporters are told what story to go after.  They are never going to write about the real mundane lives many of us have as we are far from headline grabbing.  At the moment there is a lot fo stories going around about students 'having' to turn to sex work to fund their studies so this is what people are going to write about as it is newsworthy.

Students forced into sex work by course fee hikes, makes a far better story than Married mum chooses sex work to buy luxuries.

Most of us will never be headline news so why flame someone for just doing their job.

Truth is far more important than what one wants to hear. With truth there is no us and them or colour or religion there is just fact

Mellow

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Re: Are you working to fund your studies or future career?
« Reply #35 on: 20 March 2012, 01:57:18 pm »
I for one wasn't having a go at Jack, and I think most posters on the thread were not.  And I totally agree with Emily on this; she says it far better than I could.

If we don't tell the journos who approach us that there is a more interesting story out there than just repeating prossie stereotypes, who are we going to tell? How is anything ever going to change? Is someone going to make a quick call to Murdoch and announce that us prossies are bored of being asked the same old questions repeatedly?

(I've been using escorting to pay for my education and to support me while I attempt to launch a freelance career, for the record, but Jack still ain't interested in hearing what I tell him and it's not my fault if his boss has told him to write something boring and silly. In fact, Jack's probably had more excitement here with all the grumbling and ranting than he ever has when going out to research his other articles which are probably about people seeing Jesus' face on their toast ;D or z-list celebs doing tedious things, if it's that sorta rag! And I'm not disparaging his work - but if he's doing this particular article and has been instructed to stick to the most boring of tropes then, well, you know.)

Sorry to move it away from the topic; but I do think that is why so many women have posted here.  Its a chicken and egg situation - if no journalist is brave enough to move away from the strereotype nothing will change.

(Not a dig at you Jack; just a general obsservation)

Now I'd best leave the thread to its own devices before I start repeating myself!


Jackman

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Re: Are you working to fund your studies or future career?
« Reply #36 on: 20 March 2012, 03:49:59 pm »
Hi, once again many thanks for all the opinions and advice. If only everyone I contacted was as opinionated and forthright (in the best possible way) as you lot. And I have been doing this for too long to be put off or offended by cirticism and rebuttal (not that anything that has been said is overly-hostile).
What I would love to add, though, is that although some of you have offered me direction and insights into what might make a better article, none of the recomendations seem to have come with a real willingness to participate (which is fine). But I WOULD gladly take you up on the offer, if the story is interesting enough - editor's cloying demands aside. However, it seems that although happy to put me straight, fewer are happy to actually speak (which again is fine, but not my fault for not communicating it to the world).

"If we don't tell the journos who approach us that there is a more interesting story out there than just repeating prossie stereotypes, who are we going to tell? How is anything ever going to change?"

I don't want to perpetuate boring stereotypes, so give me something to work with!   

"Students forced into sex work by course fee hikes, makes a far better story than Married mum chooses sex work to buy luxuries." - NOT TRUE!
I would LOVE to speak to someone who is willing to talk to me about this lifetstyle choice and why it works for them. And I guarantee it would be a great article.

And after reading some other threads, I would like to finally lay it on the table about payment. A reporter would generally not pay you your hourly rate for an interview, if ever. In the same way a solicitor or waitress wouldn't be paid by the hour when they are interviewed by the press. The BBC certainly doesn't have money to pay for interviews. They rely on people speaking because they want to. For my purposes I would pay on publication, and the amount would depend on the story. ?5,000 is not an unreasonable amount - but you'd have to be sitting on a pretty amazing story!

(I'm pretty thrilling at the amount of responses this thread has - I never expected it for a minute)

EmilyJones

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Re: Are you working to fund your studies or future career?
« Reply #37 on: 21 March 2012, 10:36:05 am »
And after reading some other threads, I would like to finally lay it on the table about payment. A reporter would generally not pay you your hourly rate for an interview, if ever. In the same way a solicitor or waitress wouldn't be paid by the hour when they are interviewed by the press. The BBC certainly doesn't have money to pay for interviews. They rely on people speaking because they want to. For my purposes I would pay on publication, and the amount would depend on the story. ?5,000 is not an unreasonable amount - but you'd have to be sitting on a pretty amazing story!

The thing is, does a solicitor or waitress risk having their kids or the opportunity to work in certain fields in the future taken away if they talk openly about their work? You must see why we prossies do not want to come forward to risk our futures just to titillate readers while they read our article over their toast'n'eggs in the morning? Especially not for zero financial reward! Sure, some people do chase fame at any cost but the vast majority of us have two eyes and a brain so we see the scorn that's poured onto women who dare to speak openly about sex work, and the devastation that can occur in their lives post-'fame'. Even the bravest of activists have to be really careful about who they speak to. And let's not even begin to think of the barrage of hatred that poor girl who went on x-factor (or something?) got; she's still trying to work but it must be a bloody nightmare. Not that she didn't bring it on herself, but still! Any fleeting fancies I might've had of being a famous artist/politician/campaigner-for-things-I-care-about while casually being open about my sex work past became even more squished.

Sorry - I'm not tempering my words with a thousand smiley faces here so they probably sound much more angry/ranty than I actually intend. But I'm just stating the facts here. From what I've heard (I've had dozens of clients who work in TV/media, plus of course all prossies are contacted by journalists regularly), it's really hard to put a whole article - let alone TV show - together about prostitution because the men and women involved won't come forwards to talk about it. So I understand your possible frustration there, Jack. But you must understand why we don't want to take a huge personal risk for no reward! I suppose it's a bit of an impossible circle, really, but you could try contacting sex work activists directly if you want a higher likelihood of getting quotable responses.

I just put "sex work activism london" into Google and saw mentions of x:talk and Sex Worker Open University, amongst plenty of other possibly-useful stuff. You've probably already been in touch with them but, if not, you'll have a much better chance with men and women who've decided to already be open about doing sex work than with those of us who usually spend time here for the specific reason that we do not feel personally able to be or comfortable with being public about our work. Again, women who have children or who want to do nursing or midwifery or certain other professions are extremely vulnerable when it comes to revealing their work, even though they are also much more likely to be unable to do long enough hours (due to child-raising and/or training commitments) in any other job to earn enough to support themselves and potentially also their families, which is just a very unfair situation. Probably another good focus for an article but you'd definitely have to offer some major compensation and total anonymity to any women who might be prepared to take a huge risk by talking to you.

(I'm pretty thrilling at the amount of responses this thread has - I never expected it for a minute)

See, I thought you'd be enjoying it. ;D I did get the impression you weren't going to scream and/or cry in surprise even when being argued with by ladies who are supposed to be super-obliging! Honestly, you should see some of the people we get around here thinking we're all going to go "yes sir" when they - a random person on the internet - make a bunch of demands. *goes off into a long tangental rant*
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blondieMK

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Re: Are you working to fund your studies or future career?
« Reply #38 on: 31 May 2012, 04:13:15 pm »
I plan to save up enough money to take over the world  ::)
When I first started in the industry I was indeed in full time education but actually decided to pursue a career in the sex trade. Whilst a lot of Uni students work to support themselves I don't think it has a lot of relevance.
Many women may do this because they enjoy it. Maybe they are doing it because they have a mortgage or possibly they have debt to pay off.
I think there's a lot more women that go into this industry Before they go into/back to education.
« Last Edit: 31 May 2012, 04:18:00 pm by blondieMK »
"Ain?t no tellin when I?ll go, so there ain?t sh*t that I?ma wait for. I?m the type to say a prayer and then go get what I just prayed for." - Drake.

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Kimmy

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Re: Are you working to fund your studies or future career?
« Reply #39 on: 05 June 2012, 02:55:56 pm »
Hi improbablecats,

Yes, that would be interesting. I've often heard/ read equal rights campaigners saying there's little chance a woman would go into prostitution of their own volition and that there must always be a certain amount of coercion involved. I always wondered if this was the case. Now that some of the stigma around sex work is beginning to wane I think a more complex picture of those industries and its workers is beginning to emerge. No doubt there are as many reasons for entering into it as there are people doing it. However, like in any industry there will be certain broad truths and common experiences that form a general experience. I'm not looking to generalise or categorise with my feature, however, I know the area which interests me and hope to find someone who can shed more light on it.

What about escorts who are doing it because there is no other employment available that doesnt take away your whole life time for a minimal amount?

I plan on studying but in reality I started at age 18 because escorting and webcamming is the most financially viable career for me, in a no-job zone in the NW as a young woman, in order to enjoy my youth and save money to travel etc.

On the other hand, I'm well interested in talking to the press and even being on telly, my whole family knows about my profession and I have nothing to hide  :o ;D

amy

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Re: Are you working to fund your studies or future career?
« Reply #40 on: 05 June 2012, 02:59:35 pm »
Folks, this thread has been dead for nearly three months. I would strongly suggest addressing any further responses directly to the OP, since I doubt very much he's going to see them now.

emz

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Re: Are you working to fund your studies or future career?
« Reply #41 on: 27 June 2012, 08:16:38 am »
I doubt that you will get anyone who is willing to publicly admit that they became escorts to pay for school because they would not be able to find employment after graduation when they try to purse the career they went to school for. My experience around getting into to escorting was to pay for school. I did not qualify for student loans and had no other way to pay (my parents refused to help), so I needed to find something that would make me enough money to cover tuition. The only thing that paid enough was escorting.  I won an appeal part-way through school and was granted student loans at which point I quit escorting. I only worked for a bit over a year. I am now about to begin a Masters in social work with the assistance of student loans. Although I would love to say that I went into escorting because I wanted to, this is not the case for everyone. Escorting for me was not fun, and it has left me with a lot of struggles and guilt. Everyone has a different experience I guess. Unfortunately, I am a bit like the stereotypical escort that these women are talking about; but many of the women who I worked with were not and made the decision to work as escorts and were very happy, were not drug addicts, and were not forced into working. I hope this helps.

amy

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Re: Are you working to fund your studies or future career?
« Reply #42 on: 27 June 2012, 10:08:13 am »
Emz, did you read the post directly above yours?

I give up. Locked.