aaaaaaaaaaaaa..... hillarious !!!

guys who have a shower and you walk in afterwards to find your shower covered in pubes, towels all over the floor and water also all over the floor..did they shower or have a fight with the appliances?

When the subject line of an email starts "Re:" when it's their first email. I feel like they're trying to trick me into opening the email. (or maybe it's just me)

Silliest-

When I've just started cooking dinner, like the chicken has literally just hit the skillet, then I get a request for booking within the hour. Happens frequently!

Clients putting their clothes/used towels on upholstery and not on the dressing table - So gross and rude!

Having to do laundry everyday is a pain since I don't have a washer/dryer inside my apartment. There's a security camera in the complex's laundry room & by now the staff must figure I have a obsessive compulsion to bleach the fckk out of my linens once a day!

When a client wants to stare into your eyes while you're f**king. There's only so much pretending I can do...

Quote from: DarleneDreams on 11 May 2014, 06:54:50 am

Silliest-

When I've just started cooking dinner, like the chicken has literally just hit the skillet, then I get a request for booking within the hour. Happens frequently!

Clients putting their clothes/used towels on upholstery and not on the dressing table - So gross and rude!

Having to do laundry everyday is a pain since I don't have a washer/dryer inside my apartment. There's a security camera in the complex laundry room & by now the staff must figure I have a obsessive compulsion to bleach the fckk out of my linens once a day!

You could get like a weeks worth of linen to change everyday then do one massive load once a week?

I could do that and I used to. Since it's now super hot where I live (heatwave last week hit triple digits) all the massage oil and ejaculate would ferment in the hamper. Ferment and stain!

Heres's a silly gripe: my morning poops are regularly timed in such a way that taking a slightly earlier booking is problematic.

When clients in parlours decline OWO for extra? but immediately upon putting a condom on they say 'i like my balls being licked/suck my balls'. I have found it's the men with hairy balls that do this, I wouldn't suck those kind of jungle balls if they had paid extra for OWO.

Over excited men in quicky brothel bookings grind my gears too. As soon as you finish covered oral, they want you to climb on top and have no patience to wait 10 secs while I change the condom.

Similarly, clients who think its possible to put a condom on a limp penis the size of my little finger (smaller even) and then get on top. Mission penetration impossible.

Not so much a silly gripe, I'm mostly irritated by the things that could have an impact on my health. As such, I can't believe how many grown, adult men think it's okay to try and rub their bare penis over my genitals.

I've just realised, I need to try being an independent escort again. I'm clearly p'd off with parlour punting.

I saw a butcher who I kid you not even after the preliminary shower still brought in the smell of raw meat,

Also clients who are so hairy down below that they can't quite rinse the shower gel out or dry properly and I end up with a tongue full of leftover suds