I wonder whether there aren't just some inherent 'double-thinks' in our line of work for clients that just make it really tricky for some of them to get their heads around?

Like how, while our job can be wonderful, it's like any other job in that not many prossies would be doing it for free (even considering that many women out there have sex plentifully and freely, it's still only with partners of their choosing so our industry still thrives). And more particularly, the fact that while we may have absolutely no problem seeing a guy as a great client, we would probably choose not to be having sex with him were he suddenly to mention he forgot to bring any money with him. So, for some clients, they have to put almost as much work in as we do to submerge these ideas somewhere in the back of their minds in order to enjoy a booking. Of course, plenty of clients are more like "I'm boinking a hottie so I'm going to enjoy this sex and not be pondering what it means to pay a partner to consent to physical intimacy" or "my wife is mean so I deserve a paid shag" and I actually do rather like these guys cos they definitely don't bring any emotional hang-ups to bookings (as long as they don't talk about their wives)!

But I think it's understandable that maybe the more 'anxious thinkers' of the world struggle even as they go through with appointments. As a 25-year-old woman, I can't imagine what it must be like to be a 35- or 45- or 55-year-old bloke considering paying for sex so honestly, I think it's fair that it's a sometimes-confusing time for them and that can result in saying odd things during bookings. While I've no truck with trying to make someone else feel bad just because you do (in the case of clients who bring a foul mood to bookings and to their best to transmit it to you - not nice!), I suppose really the only thing that annoys me about the odd 'compliments' is that they come from a place of likely total confusion which cannot really be helped because I can't change the nature of the situation we're in, can I?

I got told I was 'better than this' today, and I immediately thought of this thread  

I know I go on about it a lot, but I think the stereotypical image of streetwalkers has a lot to do with things. As you grow up and learn about the world, that's the image you have when you think of prostitutes, so it's ingrained.

Although then a man might get into the punting scene (I don't like the term punting, dunno why, but that's a separate thread! I use it, because it fits, but I find it weird and a bit creepy. Anyhoo...) and find out about parlours, agencies and independents etc, the image of the prostitute shivering on the street corner, Band-Of-Gold-style, occasionally being murdered and scrapping with pimps is still with them.

A strange PS - the guy who told me I was better than this did so on AW directIM, I've taken to logging in on that when I'm doing something on my computer. Bugger all money in it, but every little helps. Anyway, it was hours ago he said it, and he's just popped back up as I am typing this. Ooooh, spooky  

I got told I was 'better than this' today, and I immediately thought of this thread  

I know I go on about it a lot, but I think the stereotypical image of streetwalkers has a lot to do with things. As you grow up and learn about the world, that's the image you have when you think of prostitutes, so it's ingrained.

Although then a man might get into the punting scene (I don't like the term punting, dunno why, but that's a separate thread! I use it, because it fits, but I find it weird and a bit creepy. Anyhoo...) and find out about parlours, agencies and independents etc, the image of the prostitute shivering on the street corner, Band-Of-Gold-style, occasionally being murdered and scrapping with pimps is still with them.

A strange PS - the guy who told me I was better than this did so on AW directIM, I've taken to logging in on that when I'm doing something on my computer. Bugger all money in it, but every little helps. Anyway, it was hours ago he said it, and he's just popped back up as I am typing this. Ooooh, spooky  

I loved that series, I can remeber the scene with Samantha morten saying,
"?5 for a wank"
to a kerb crawler.

I agree it's how society has portrayed prostitution. I think it also relates to their own feelings of guilt & denial at having to pay for sex. They are saying it outwardly to us, that we are too good to do it but really it's directed at themselves in most circumstances.

Most of my clients are city boys and I've been told, more often than I'd like to remember, that I don't need to do this job because I could easily get a nice banker to look after me 
*sigh*

It makes me laugh. Is it wrong for an intelligent woman to do this? No. I'd say quite the opposite. Intellect is a crucial part of it

Lol!  I've had all of this!

You'd make a nice wife: I hope you're looking for a rich man to look after you: Are you putting away for retirement: You're not going to do this for too long are you: You're better than this: You could do much better than this: Why are you doing this: Don't you want to get married and have kids: (hee hee, they don't know I'm already married!).  I've also had men apologise to me (for seeing me?): Tell me they feel guilty: Assure me they love their wives: Tell me that they're normally resolutely monogamous: and complain that hookers are ruining their life

It's all soo offensive but I've learned to zone it out.

I agree that a lot of these comments can be offensive - but to a degree I feel that I can choose whether I am offended or not. As far as is possible I just try to take the compliment that they are trying to make in their bumbling, inarticulate way and let the rest bound off the thick skin I wear when I'm working. Occasionally I crack though and 'You are better than this!' gets a big smile and a reply of 'Thank you! Do you think I should put my prices up?' which hasn't worked yet, but you never know

I agree  - I think it depends what general frame of mind you are in - if you are feeling great about life everything bad just bounces off you and if you get a compliment......woohoo.   If however you've had a horrible stressful time of it for months (aka me last year) then you take things to heart more.

This year I'm going to try NOT to take things personally (in general not just my escorting life)

I might copy your idea of commenting about putting my price up if anyone says that to me again!

It seems to me that most of the negative perceptions are based on how we are portrayed in the media which polarizes the entire industry into either 'street walking crack whores' or '?500 per hour Belle du Jour' - but then men who pay for sex are also judged harshly as inadequate perverts or potential sex offenders.  There is a huge middle ground for both sex workers and clients which is full of people who are either making a living or spending their own money as they see fit. The problem is, there's just no headline in 'Happy normal people express freedom of choice'...

R xx

Yup too true, think I've said as much elsewhere.

Had one on webcam the other night - "Do you really escort? You look above it." My answer was "I don't see it that way because I'm not a self hating moron - are you?" and he left