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Author Topic: Whats the grossest thing that has happened to you.  (Read 139208 times)

cheesypeas

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Re: Whats the grossest thing that has happened to you.
« Reply #195 on: 14 June 2015, 01:57:33 pm »
I agree totally PW..I'd be tempted to do a warning on him here maybe..... ;)

All my rimming guys are scrupulously super-clean, smell like roses.
But I had a two time client who'd have a poo just before we started
and never wiped or washed his ass properly. Despite 'using' the shower.

I'd wash him clean with boiling hot flannel, soap, dettol disnfectant on the bed
like a baby, till I was satisfied. He was totally unconcerned about being bed-washed.
I sussed he did it on purpose as a perve. I overcharged him so hard, I was ok-ish with it.
« Last Edit: 14 June 2015, 04:32:14 pm by cheesypeas »
Random idle thoughs...Can I manage 100 sit ups a day for a year...?

sensualmilf

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Re: Whats the grossest thing that has happened to you.
« Reply #196 on: 14 June 2015, 02:09:56 pm »
Thank fuck I'm a diet; I feel positively ill!!  :-X :-X :-X :-X

If a smelly, shitty bastard comes my way, he's is OUT THE DOOR.

cheesypeas

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Re: Whats the grossest thing that has happened to you.
« Reply #197 on: 14 June 2015, 02:12:09 pm »
SM, I know LOL !....but they catch you out out
sometimes, before you know what's happening ;D
« Last Edit: 14 June 2015, 04:33:33 pm by cheesypeas »
Random idle thoughs...Can I manage 100 sit ups a day for a year...?

LAC-xox

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Re: Whats the grossest thing that has happened to you.
« Reply #198 on: 15 June 2015, 09:15:59 am »
Had a weird one this weekend. It was an overnight and the guy had had a lot to drink.. He got a little over excited and asked me to put my finger down his willy hole (what are they called?!). I told him that it was going to hurt in the morning but no, he was adamant. Apart from feeling a bit weird, nothing too dramatic happened during but OMG after.. Blood spurting out everywhere for nearly 10 minutes!! the bedsheets looked like something out of a horror movie!
Suppose he didn't consider my long pointy acrylic nails  ;D

cheesypeas

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Re: Whats the grossest thing that has happened to you.
« Reply #199 on: 14 July 2015, 04:33:47 pm »
Today....68 yr old client had a shower and I popped
in after to check the bathroom and two little blobs of shit
on the shower floor! :o  ...and a shitty towel  :-\

I asked if he knew he'd shat himself, he wasn't aware
and very embarassed...and offered to clean it up.

I think he was caught short using the shower as
I heard lots of banging around.
« Last Edit: 14 July 2015, 05:38:06 pm by cheesypeas »
Random idle thoughs...Can I manage 100 sit ups a day for a year...?

Erotic flower

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Re: Whats the grossest thing that has happened to you.
« Reply #200 on: 14 July 2015, 06:12:12 pm »
One of my clients asked me to wank him off into a bowl and he wanted to drink it after
when he got to do it , suddenly he couldn't drink it( said he had gone off the idea) I was quite relieved but felt sick anyway  :-X

Siorse

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Re: Whats the grossest thing that has happened to you.
« Reply #201 on: 14 July 2015, 10:23:49 pm »
Definately this really overweight client I had, whose penis had retracted into the skin, so I had to put my finger IN it to reach his knob head.
I swear I'm not makin this up lol, I've mentioned it before in another thread ages ago and I don't know if anyone believed me, but it was definitely the grossest thing I've experienced up to date, that combined with the fact he was so overweight he had all the skinfolds with sores going on, didn't smell too good and his skin was flaking all over my (dark) sheet. Eeeeww.
I don't have to be perfect, but I'm perfect at being me!

Fabulassie

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Re: Whats the grossest thing that has happened to you.
« Reply #202 on: 14 July 2015, 11:15:57 pm »
I've had to probe into the fat to find the Willie before... I believe you!

Naked Chef

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Re: Whats the grossest thing that has happened to you.
« Reply #203 on: 15 July 2015, 03:57:19 am »
This is pure comedy gold. I am in absolute stitches reading these! Of course, it is horrific that you had to experience that, some men have no awareness of their personal hygiene.

I will tell you one of mine: I was using my vibrating egg on a client during anal play and instead of letting me remove it in a clean(er) and (more) hygienic manner, just yanked it out of himself. The smell that hit the room was horrendous. The stink of fresh shit hit me in the face and almost burned my eyes. Despite the smell, there was absolutely no sign of anything to explain in. At first I thought maybe he just farted; an atrocious must-have-a-sick-bowel kind of fart. So I tried to crack on with the booking but the smell had engulphed the entire room and was making me gag. By this point, my client looked embarassed and I could tell something was wrong. He said he just wanted to lie and chat for the rest of the booking, so we did. And so did the smell. At the end of the booking, he got up off the bed and that's when I saw it. A huge streak of shite across the white duvet.   >:( >:(

Siorse

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Re: Whats the grossest thing that has happened to you.
« Reply #204 on: 15 July 2015, 07:45:37 pm »
I've had to probe into the fat to find the Willie before... I believe you!

Phew lol, at last somebody else has came across this Fab!  ;)
I'd posted it in a thread before and I got the impression everybody thought I was talking rubbish lol, but it's a true (and horrible)
story!  ;D
I don't have to be perfect, but I'm perfect at being me!

Siorse

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Re: Whats the grossest thing that has happened to you.
« Reply #205 on: 15 July 2015, 07:49:27 pm »
And hat of to you Naked Chef, there's no way I could've completed that booking, I would most definitely been violently ill.
I can't stand the smell of s***, baby's poo is bad enough, but a grown man's is an entirely different story, don't know HOW
you got through that!!  ;)
I don't have to be perfect, but I'm perfect at being me!

MollyG

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Re: Whats the grossest thing that has happened to you.
« Reply #206 on: 15 July 2015, 11:22:50 pm »
Client with smelly smegma, it left a bad taste literally  :-X

Another with a broken frenulum, the bit that's under the penis tore during sex and blood everywhere. I nearly threw up it was the grossest thing that happened to me

Emma_C

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Re: Whats the grossest thing that has happened to you.
« Reply #207 on: 16 July 2015, 09:02:12 am »
One of my clients asked me to wank him off into a bowl and he wanted to drink it after
when he got to do it , suddenly he couldn't drink it( said he had gone off the idea) I was quite relieved but felt sick anyway  :-X

Yuck! I had a guy contact me once to ask if I could save clients used condoms so he could put all the spunk in a cup & drink it!  :-X needless to say I mentioned the health & safety risks & told him to sod off. I'm just glad it was asked in an email. Vile!

Lucie268

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Re: Whats the grossest thing that has happened to you.
« Reply #208 on: 16 July 2015, 12:39:28 pm »
One of my clients asked me to wank him off into a bowl and he wanted to drink it after
when he got to do it , suddenly he couldn't drink it( said he had gone off the idea) I was quite relieved but felt sick anyway  :-X

Yuck! I had a guy contact me once to ask if I could save clients used condoms so he could put all the spunk in a cup & drink it!  :-X needless to say I mentioned the health & safety risks & told him to sod off. I'm just glad it was asked in an email. Vile!

I've had someone ask that too  :-X so gross

Siorse

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Re: Whats the grossest thing that has happened to you.
« Reply #209 on: 16 July 2015, 12:54:27 pm »
Oh whaaat?! You really do get  strange people..  ???
Why would you want to "drink" other people's (old,stale..) spunk??
That is beyond disgusting.. I'm baffled..
I don't have to be perfect, but I'm perfect at being me!