SAAFE forum
General Category => Blather and Babble => Topic started by: Orchid on 07 May 2013, 09:28:09 pm
-
I often feel tempted to say *oh thanks for paying for the road tax, petrol, shopping* as I ride on top, best not though !!!
-
Lol i onced sed ty i can pay my rent now he just looked at me gone out. Then sed after im glad you enjoyed yourself then ! lol
-
I'm forever putting my foot in it....especially with regulars. I get too complacent! I said to one regular, who is very hard work, "I really didn't feel like coming out tonight in this weather, but beggars can't be choosers" He said, "Gee thanks....that's made me feel so special"....oops! We did both burst out laughing though, as I'm always saying the wrong thing with him!
-
I'm forever putting my foot in it....especially with regulars. I get too complacent! I said to one regular, who is very hard work, "I really didn't feel like coming out tonight in this weather, but beggars can't be choosers" He said, "Gee thanks....that's made me feel so special"....oops! We did both burst out laughing though, as I'm always saying the wrong thing with him!
Lol i sometimes do the same but they come bk though ! lol
-
Is it in?
-
Is it in?
lmao
or *pointing* ...Oh look, it's like a willy but smaller!
-
I keep putting my foot in with 'it's weird how some men look like they have small willies and it suddenly looks larger when it's erect. Not that I'm saying you have a small willie to start with but you know what I mean?' :o
-
I'm forever putting my foot in it....especially with regulars. I get too complacent! I said to one regular, who is very hard work, "I really didn't feel like coming out tonight in this weather, but beggars can't be choosers" He said, "Gee thanks....that's made me feel so special"....oops! We did both burst out laughing though, as I'm always saying the wrong thing with him!
Lol i sometimes do the same but they come bk though ! lol
I know what you mean about putting your foot in it with regulars though, I once had one ask me if I enjoyed sex with him, I paused then nothing came out of my mouth lol For once I was speechless.
-
I didnt have to Take that did it for me once, I had a client who was really struggling to come and after a while 'have a little patience by take that' came on the iPod. ;D he did see the funny side tho!
-
I'm forever putting my foot in it....especially with regulars. I get too complacent! I said to one regular, who is very hard work, "I really didn't feel like coming out tonight in this weather, but beggars can't be choosers" He said, "Gee thanks....that's made me feel so special"....oops! We did both burst out laughing though, as I'm always saying the wrong thing with him!
Lol i sometimes do the same but they come bk though ! lol
I know what you mean about putting your foot in it with regulars though, I once had one ask me if I enjoyed sex with him, I paused then nothing came out of my mouth lol For once I was speechless.
I hate that when they ask if you enjoy sex with them, or if they're good in bed. No matter what you say it always comes out sounding fake and conceited
-
"nice arse hair, ever considered dreadlocks"
-
Well one of my clients said to me mid shag that he was in a bit of a rush as his wife was in labour, felt like kicking him up the hole for that! Not for saying what he said but for being with me when clearly there are MUCH MUCH more important things he should have been doing lol. Some guys eh ::)
xx
-
While undressing a client a look at his penis and said "o good I prefer small penis!"
-
When a regular of mine was taking forever to cum and I'd tried everything possible, we started giggling about it and I became a bit too familiar and jokey and said, "Yeah I'm flogging a dead horse here I think." He suddenly stopped laughing and it all went very quiet! lol oops!
-
I have a really, really bad habit of saying "Shall we put something on the little fella then?" ::)
-
Haha! Funny thread guys.
I had a session session earlier with a man who thought dry hard fingering was fun for me.
Just as we were getting dressed he commented that the porn star on the movie we were watching that was being fingered looked and sounded in pain. Without thinking I snorted "Yeah, I have no doubt she is in pain! Some men don't know what they are doing" them it kinda went quiet!
-
I have serious issues with fingering, dry & hard fingering makes me so tense it makes me hyperventilate sometimes. They dig for gold sometimes. It feels like they are fisting me when they are only trying to get the second finger in but that's cause I am so tense and they think girls get wet instantly. I don't get wet at all when I am working I don't think so I use lube. Oh its a hard life but where else would we get this kinda money for the things we want/need in life? Every job has its draw back I guess its just that our draw backs are our health x
-
There are lots of things I would like to say to some clients, but never would as long as I want to remain working lol.
Only once have I ever slipped us when a client asked me what he could do to make me very happy, I told him double my fee and don't touch me. He laughed gave me a lovely tip and became a very good reg.
-
I have serious issues with fingering, dry & hard fingering makes me so tense it makes me hyperventilate sometimes. They dig for gold sometimes. It feels like they are fisting me when they are only trying to get the second finger in but that's cause I am so tense and they think girls get wet instantly. I don't get wet at all when I am working I don't think so I use lube. Oh its a hard life but where else would we get this kinda money for the things we want/need in life? Every job has its draw back I guess its just that our draw backs are our health x
Maybe play with some toys before the client fingers will help.
-
Its more cause I have had accidents with clients slipping and scratching me and cutting me so I tense up, no matter weather I am turned on or not. I just don't like fingering (I love it in real life, makes me squirt and everything but not in work, those numpty's don't have a clue and its not even their fault really, how are they supposed to know what I like when we've only just met? Its a weird one)
xx
-
I have serious issues with fingering, dry & hard fingering makes me so tense it makes me hyperventilate sometimes. They dig for gold sometimes. It feels like they are fisting me when they are only trying to get the second finger in but that's cause I am so tense and they think girls get wet instantly. I don't get wet at all when I am working I don't think so I use lube. Oh its a hard life but where else would we get this kinda money for the things we want/need in life? Every job has its draw back I guess its just that our draw backs are our health x
This has to be the most uncomfortable painful feeling, will not allow fingering ever its like a medical examination, turn on for who? well only them, certainly not some of us .
-
Well I admit that I've slipped into the habit of referring to all cocks as "little" which is fine for the men who loved to be humiliated but not so much for the rest of them.
As for men speaking during sex - perhaps they shouldn't. One man, who seemed happily into the sex with lots of moaning with pleasure, suddenly asked me completely out of the blue what make of telly I had. That put me off my stride. I asked him why he asked and he said it had just popped into his head. I did enquire but apparently he didn't make his living selling/mending tvs.
-
"hold on, just trying to remember which condom colour is the small ones!"
-
Five and 6 o my god, o my god. O MY GOD!!! I've won the fucking lottery. YAY!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
-
"hold on, just trying to remember which condom colour is the small ones!"
:D
-
I have this crazy mass of hair (on my head lol) and I have this regular who has the fullest head of hair I have ever seen, once I said to him 'our babies would have the maddest hair in the play group' he just went quiet lol
-
Well last night to my regular who books me at hotels near the airport, when we were undressing, I am very honest and said wow, you do have a big cock. He then spent the next ten minutes talking about the past and how many of his previous girlfriends have said it was far too big to go in, how they've needed lube, and then went on about the pros and cons of having a big penis! As I said in a previous post somewhere, this regular is quite happy to receive a handjob and come quickly, and spend the rest of the time talking about his problems! He even refuses any other sexual act after he's had his handjob lol!
-
Well last night to my regular who books me at hotels near the airport, when we were undressing, I am very honest and said wow, you do have a big cock. He then spent the next ten minutes talking about the past and how many of his previous girlfriends have said it was far too big to go in, how they've needed lube, and then went on about the pros and cons of having a big penis! As I said in a previous post somewhere, this regular is quite happy to receive a handjob and come quickly, and spend the rest of the time talking about his problems! He even refuses any other sexual act after he's had his handjob lol!
Maybe I shouldn't tell the big cock ones that they're gifted but can't help myself.
-
I was once camming with a client who asked me to fuck him on webcam with my with duo girl partner. She was sat on his face so he couldnt see the screen and the comments and one cheeky viewer said "He has got a dick like a chipolata" but I read it out loud before I realised what i was saying. My duo girl partner just burst out laughing, I don't think the client was best pleased lol..... ;D
-
I hate that when they ask if you enjoy sex with them, or if they're good in bed. No matter what you say it always comes out sounding fake and conceited
That's why if they ask I always reply, "euw no, it was horrible. I'm not doing that again" (but only with those who I think share my sense of humour and in a way they know I'm joking) ;D
-
Just after they've cum in me (anally in a condom), I usually say:
"We just made a baby"
Gets a smile, every time.
-
"nice arse hair, ever considered dreadlocks"
Haha! Brilliant x
-
'Was that your stomach or mine?', seems to happen a lot during bookings!
-
A guy just wanted anal. I spent a few minutes explaining how I had just eaten and how I need to pooh and douch, then told him a bit about my diet, opposition to all package foods and fear of pooh on a condom . AND he kept his dick hard, LOL thats viagra or pure lust at work. Plus I got another booking out of him. Going to be more honest and tell every one about my body functions. It must be dead sexy :) Time for a pooh, chow chow :) :) x x x
-
I love the way you spell poo lol x
-
Lol you ladies do make me laugh! I love this forum :D
-
is it in yet .....
-
I have a really, really bad habit of saying "Shall we put something on the little fella then?" ::)
I laughed so much at this I nearly fell out of bed!
Thank you for cheering up an old lady! x
-
A few times have said is it in. Then realised shouldn't have said.