Author Topic: What's the most difficult about being a prostitute? (Read 14690 times)

Carolynfeline · « **on:** 08 February 2015, 02:17:09 pm »

Seriously, I am wondering how many of you feel they have to do this job simply because of the financial gain?
Yes, it is difficult for a man to accept a woman who does this job.
But to me it seems, it is mainly because of the social stigma.
Th disrespect of some men who think they can take advantage of you because you aren't a worthy member of our society.

My burn out always uses to start as soon people begin to judge and you feel that everyone wants to "get you out" of that terrible occupation that is damaging your mental health?while I was clearly more miserable before but not just because of the money but sexual experience which I enjoy.
What do you think?
What is really damaging to you about being a prostitute?

Midsstudent · « **Reply #1 on:** 08 February 2015, 02:28:14 pm »

I don't really associate with people that would have a problem with it as I have no desire to be read the riot act over my life choices.

I don't find it damaging. I think one day if it comes out it may be an issue but it's no illegal etc so there is no legal ground for it to effect my career.

The job has it's downsides but that is why we're compensated so greatly for it. I would be miserable in a minimum wage job, I am in this out of choice, because it's a pretty awesome job with good hours and great pay. Take the good with the bad I say!

Treetop · « **Reply #2 on:** 08 February 2015, 02:38:08 pm »

I almost had a major burn out recently (pulled myself back, thank god.) The only thing I find damaging is the stigma attached to the job. I was recently run out of my own town, paint thrown at me, beheaded xmas snowman, disowned by family etc. So It does get me down sometimes to know that people view sex workers as either Whores or victims, but I'm not sure what we can do to change such a deeply rooted view. I've had civvie jobs and hated them!

Except one major burn out where I had to take a office job (never again until I have my house) I really do love this job, I do it partly for the huge financial gains, and think any of us who said we didn't would just be kidding ourselves, but also because aside from my rants about timewasters and getting lonely sometimes I really do love the job and the sort of lifestyle being self employed gives me.

At the end of the day, its been 6years, I wouldn't be in any other line of work because I love it!

TheLittleMatchGirl · « **Reply #3 on:** 08 February 2015, 03:11:00 pm »

I don't get bothered by the stigma, I'm not really faced with any as those who know know me and it's been a while now they see I'm fine, even my dad who was distraught and worried sees I'm ok now.
Anyway I find some clients' attitudes difficult I guess, I find some can have more of a bad attitude towards hookers than civvies

Midsstudent · « **Reply #4 on:** 08 February 2015, 03:21:28 pm »

I agree with you Little Match, some of the attitudes of guys on punter forums amaze me, like we're lesser human beings for offering services they use. And the attitude of they pay us so we should shut up and do as we're told. Lucky for me none of my clients are like that, my screening is fairly vigorous and I guess I'm lucky $:-\$

The_Lynx · « **Reply #5 on:** 08 February 2015, 03:31:55 pm »

Same as Midsstudent, I don't associate with people who'd take an issue with this. Not just to avoid unnecessary badgering but also due to ideological reasons. I voluntarily cut off a significant part of my family after they found out and started being a pain. All my close friends are aware and okay with it, and I'd readily "shed" anyone who'd start giving me grief.

Generally, I don't find the job damaging at all. Frustrating? Every now and then, certainly, but not any more than all the other service industry jobs I've worked. Bottom line is, dealing with other people is a pain in the ass at times.

Midsstudent · « **Reply #6 on:** 08 February 2015, 03:42:08 pm »

Lynx - My favourite reaction to me sharing my job with a new friend was "That's so cool!".

We even discussed living together and she couldn't care less about me working from our home. I have nothing in common with the type of personality that would judge or take issue with my job, especially as I am quite open about it.

alice842 · « **Reply #7 on:** 08 February 2015, 04:21:09 pm »

I'm quite lucky because I live in London and have sex worker's breakfasts to go to and go to a sex worker's only sexual health clinic where I can talk openly about my job and ask for advice about anything that's bothering me. Similar to others on this thread, I don't associate with people who have bad attitudes towards SW.

One of the things that bothers me most is reading things that people who are against sex workers say - things like we are all abused and should all be shot for contributing towards abuse against women and just people's general lack of understanding and inability to listen to SWers and what we want/need in order to make working safer. Also not being able to talk about bad experiences at work openly for fear of it being used against me. - Not sure if that counts as stigma or not.

I have a partner who understands completely that this is a job to me and it's just what I do for money. He does worry about me though, especially when I was pretty burnt out last year from seeing too many clients and has helped me with applications for other jobs and volunteering. I found I just detested clients (and men) last year and was just fed up with seeing hobbyist type clients who spent about 30seconds saying hello before throwing themselves on me. I started to have almost out-of-body type moments where my body was doing one thing (what it was paid to) and I was thinking 'I hate this, this guy is a dickhead, I wish I could get up and leave' I feel a lot better now, just trying to avoid short in-and-out bookings.

Lastly I find it difficult talking to people who don't understand that I do this for money and don't have other options right now - hearing 'maybe you'd be better off doing another job' isn't really very helpful.

Midsstudent · « **Reply #8 on:** 08 February 2015, 04:28:04 pm »

Alice - I detest that kind of attitude because it also implies that there is no 'choice' in doing the job... there is the widely held consensus that we have to be desperate or forced to do SW.

Siorse · « **Reply #9 on:** 08 February 2015, 05:08:16 pm »

One of the things I hate is when I get recognised in my neighbourhood by young guys and they start shouting things at me

Another one is when I don't feel sexy, I'm not in the mood for sex, but got a long booking..
But I suppose you get that in every job, that you just can't be bothered with it some days, no matter what you do
or how much you love your job...

alice842 · « **Reply #10 on:** 08 February 2015, 05:24:25 pm »

Quote from: Midsstudent on 08 February 2015, 04:28:04 pm

Alice - I detest that kind of attitude because it also implies that there is no 'choice' in doing the job... there is the widely held consensus that we have to be desperate or forced to do SW.

Yeh, I mean it was still my choice to do this, I needed money but wouldn't say I was desperate or forced. I only feel 'forced' in terms of most people being forced to work under capitalism. Most of the time I prefer sex work to the idea of a minimum wage job

Dani · « **Reply #11 on:** 08 February 2015, 06:20:50 pm »

I don't find anything difficult as I don't mix with the type of people who are judgemental. I find people like that toxic and stay far away from toxic people. Its a job. Its not who I am. Any work stresses like difficult clients etc I just forget about. I don't get stresses over it. after all I cant change their behaviour so stressing is just going to harm me and not them and it wont change anything.
I also only see clients again if they are nice. If not they go straight into my block function on my phone. Again I wont see toxic people. Men who try to belittle me soon find out that I am not the one who ends up belittled. After all they chose me and paid me for sex not the other way around.

I don't see the stigma anymore as everyone knows what I do and now its just normal. when I got outed it was difficult to start with but again I ignored those who chose to try and judge me (normally those who have never worked and feel morally able to judge everyone else as they have nothing to do with their lives and are bored and skint being on the dole for all their lives). Not people whos opinion I really care about

For me the most difficult thing is getting ready for a booking as I hate wearing make up and I don't really like wearing lingerie either as prefer my PJs but they are not sexy

Carolynfeline · « **Reply #12 on:** 08 February 2015, 06:27:54 pm »

My only problem with this job is the social stigma which is getting thrown at me from many parts again after only 3 months I got back to escorting. I decided for the first time in my life to do it full-time because of the financial gain but also because I have a lot of fun and I'm enjoying it.
My parents know what I do but I believe they have a completely different idea of this because they watch so much crap on TV and it is hard to explain it to them.
I am lucky they don't judge me (too much). I would so love to speak openly about what I do, to finally feel that it is accepted as a normal occupation. The man I am seeing now I met through this occupation but he is already pushing me to "find something else" although he says he understands and somehow seems to try to accept it.
It puts so much stress on me and isn't really good for my confidence.

Erotic flower · « **Reply #13 on:** 09 February 2015, 08:48:48 am »

The way that I have been treated by so called friends about my choice of work that has absolutely no effect on them at all.I was made to feel wrong &dirty and just snubbed .
I like working and will not ever regret my choice just regret trusting the wrong people and I'd certainly not give it up for anyone.

victoryrose · « **Reply #14 on:** 09 February 2015, 05:41:35 pm »

The social stigma, having to cover it up even when telling the person you're speaking to might really help them understand your situation (I'm specifically thinking of therapists that I fear telling as the last one got me kicked out of school because of it), and certain punter attitudes. Also, the fact that we don't have proper worker rights, that it's ridiculously hard to find a premise that you can rent and work from without the owner minding, and that rape, violence and even murder are considered an "occupational hazard" by some.

See also the main SAAFE.info site for more Support And Advice For Escorts

Author Topic: What's the most difficult about being a prostitute? (Read 14690 times)

Carolynfeline

What's the most difficult about being a prostitute?

Midsstudent

Re: What's the most difficult about being a prostitute?

Treetop

Re: What's the most difficult about being a prostitute?

TheLittleMatchGirl

Re: What's the most difficult about being a prostitute?

Midsstudent

Re: What's the most difficult about being a prostitute?

The_Lynx

Re: What's the most difficult about being a prostitute?

Midsstudent

Re: What's the most difficult about being a prostitute?

alice842

Re: What's the most difficult about being a prostitute?

Midsstudent

Re: What's the most difficult about being a prostitute?

Siorse

Re: What's the most difficult about being a prostitute?

alice842

Re: What's the most difficult about being a prostitute?

Dani

Re: What's the most difficult about being a prostitute?

Carolynfeline

Re: What's the most difficult about being a prostitute?

Erotic flower

Re: What's the most difficult about being a prostitute?

victoryrose

Re: What's the most difficult about being a prostitute?