So yesterday I had an outcall. I turn up and chat to this dorky mild manners man.

We get chatting and he says he has something to tell me and asks me not to laugh, I politely reassure him I won't laugh and he suddenly starts undressing and is wearing a red lacy bra and thong. As I was in a bit of shock I didn't laugh although found it a tiny bit amusing. He was actually a very nice client and respectful but it just took me by surprise as it was my first cross depressing client and I had no prior warning.

So as just a bit of fun what's been your weirdest client? 

I had a client turn up once where he went in for a shower but took ages and ages in the bathroom, I was getting quite annoyed at this point as I offer the shower time before and after on MY TIME so I was wondering what the heck he was doing, he was making a lot of noise too and he had a rucksack with him.

Well........he came out the bathroom with a full face of make up (drag queen make up) a wig, women's clothes with these massive big heels and of course he was walking like he'd shat himself in the heels on his way up the hall to come back to my bedroom.

I'd like to say he was a nice client but he wasn't, if he was a nice client and I had no issues with him them I wouldn't be discussing him here but he was quite rude towards me, was a total boundary pusher and didn't prepare me in the slightest for him being a cross dresser so I was completely taken by surprise too.

xx

Haha I know a well established escort in Glasgow where that happened to her, she's pretty open minded and that one I am sure make her spew over his cock, serves him right lol x

The weirdest client I've met so far was quite an energetic lover and when he climaxed he actually would break into hysterics. Imagine a guy is on top of you, still in side you and he is crying with uncontralable laughter right by you face. Really loudly he sounded like the laughing policeman. He eventually rolled off but he was laughing for a good 5 minutes. This happened again the second round. It was the weirdest thing!

How odd, i wouldn't of been able to stop myself laughing too if he'd of done that with me. It's contagious is laughter especially when you're not supposed to lol.

Mine is a really weird one. I kid you not, this is the gospel truth. He came in as quiet as a mouse looking as awkward as anything, when he sat down i asked him what he liked to do and he half whispered to me "I like to be touched" Ok i thought, "How do you like to be touched?" I asked him and you'll never guess what he wanted me to do.. He wanted me to fist him up the bum wearing a marigold glove! Did i do it? Yup, and he took it easily right up to the wrist. Ouch.

I remember thinking "Fucking hell, this guy is off his rocker how can he enjoy this" but he did, and when his time was up he quietly got dressed and left. Definitely my strangest client to date.

I love the nice but weird clients. I like to play with peoples fetishes its so interesting! well within reason.

The weirdest client I've met so far was quite an energetic lover and when he climaxed he actually would break into hysterics. Imagine a guy is on top of you, still in side you and he is crying with uncontralable laughter right by you face. Really loudly he sounded like the laughing policeman. He eventually rolled off but he was laughing for a good 5 minutes. This happened again the second round. It was the weirdest thing!

Yeah I used to see a guy in Glasgow who did that before I stopped seeing him for becoming a bit too familiar and boundary pushing, trying to tell me that just licking and sucking the head of his cock WASNT OWO and then he started talking about me to other escorts cause I told him to DO ONE! Always used to try to get me to dress from head to toe in leather too which totally isn't me at all but no matter how many times I told him, he wouldn't take it in and he was really loud in bed too, majorly loud x

I once had a xd with bigger boobs than me and considering I'm an M cup thats saying something 

I also had a guy ask if he could wear leather trousers, he came out the bathroom in the trousers as well as like a cream pirate style top and a deep purple ruffled open shirt over that and leather gloves. He just looked like a pantomime bad guy.

I think because my services are so vanilla, I don't get anywhere near as many weird ones but I did have a guy last year want to drink the contents of my old used condoms from other clients. Obviously I told him no chance and never seen him again x

I have done that for clients! They ask for used condoms and drink the contents, yuk! I do lot of domination though so is not weird to me, x

I have one client who when he climaxes he bursts into tears which is a bit weird

The weirdest was frog/toad man though that on the phone asked me if he brings some new white knickers (big granny ones) would I wear them for him.  I said yes.  he forgot to tell me he would be bringing live frogs/toads with him and wanted to put them in the knickers and me to squash them with my bum on the floor.

Kicked straight back out minus the frogs as I let them go near the local pond and blocked his number

*enter vomiting emoticon here*

Oh no, what a vile creature.   I'm so glad you rescued those little souls.  God only knows what he's done with countless others though