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Author Topic: This Job and Dating Sites.  (Read 7051 times)

Gypsy

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Re: This Job and Dating Sites.
« Reply #15 on: 30 August 2018, 05:12:21 pm »
Match.com has a strange policy: allows men with sun glasses but want women to show their faces fully.  Strange site packed with guys who simply want to sleep with you and ask you with a straight face even after a glass, so I gave it a miss.  Not worth it.

Really? I did not know this. I've seen men wear crash helmets in their profile pictures. What's the point in that then? May as well not bother with a pic at all. Half of them are just down right awful though. What must go on in their heads to think this shows them in a positive light?

I am speaking to someone who seems normal and decent in his photo and in personality. He lives reasonably close-ish, but not in the same town. We haven't spoke about meeting yet. I haven't even spoken to him over the phone. But if it doesn't go anywhere I ain't going to bump in to him all the time  :)
These days there are no Prince Charmings. A girl just has to be her own hero

Gypsy

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Re: This Job and Dating Sites.
« Reply #16 on: 31 August 2018, 10:41:44 pm »
Urgh. Had an email yesterday to say that he's doesn't have any free time until after New Year.

That's okay in my book IF that's genuine. But it's a big if and I just get the feeling he's trying to let me down gently whilst sparing my feelings. I haven't told him about the job - so that's not the reason  ::)

I don't want anyone who wants to live in my pocket though, so maybe this is a huge red flag  ???
These days there are no Prince Charmings. A girl just has to be her own hero

Gypsy

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Re: This Job and Dating Sites.
« Reply #17 on: 12 September 2018, 12:43:42 pm »
Well, the first guy seemed nice at first but then came across as severely depressed. And the funniest thing was he said he was after a girl who was fun to be around. He was no where near fun. Good job he ended it after only a week of speaking.

The second man suffers from anxiety. Which is fair enough as so do I, but it's how you deal with it that matters and he doesn't deal with it very well. Way to sell oneself, by the way, disclosing all this in your second email  ::)

I have to end all communication with him as it's a chore writing emails.

The plus side of this site, however, is it's entertainment value. It's not supposed to be even mildly humorous, but some of the photos these men put up I have to say that honestly I've seen better police mug shots! And the stuff they say about themselves as well is hilarious. Unintentional hilarity, mind, but hilarious none the less  ;D
These days there are no Prince Charmings. A girl just has to be her own hero

seraphine

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Re: This Job and Dating Sites.
« Reply #18 on: 12 September 2018, 12:46:57 pm »
.
« Last Edit: 22 January 2019, 07:50:02 pm by 80s synthetic »

Gypsy

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Re: This Job and Dating Sites.
« Reply #19 on: 25 September 2018, 06:47:06 am »
'Match.com has a strange policy: allows men with sun glasses but want women to show their faces fully.  Strange site packed with guys who simply want to sleep with you and ask you with a straight face even after a glass, so I gave it a miss.  Not worth it.'

Talking of which I met a guy recently who seemed nice. The date went okay, not brilliant, but okay.

But he then text me to say he couldn't see me again because 1, My hair was a different colour and style to the one in my photo which he knew BEFORE we met and 2, I used a different username on Match to that of my real name. I told him this when we met.

He was keen to reassure me that this was the ONLY reason he didn't want to see me again. (I didn't tell him about my job, seemed like he had enough to cope with the different hair and the name  ::))

Another guy called Ajamdonut has viewed my profile. Yeah, sure, of course that's his real name.

Honestly, I'm laughing as I type. It's so ridiculous!

'She's a fake,
Sure, but she's a real fake,
On the make,
Making up for lost time ...
Just you wait,
Hey, give the girl a break ...
And a fifty dollar bill.'

 ;D ;D ;D

« Last Edit: 25 September 2018, 07:02:50 am by Gypsy »
These days there are no Prince Charmings. A girl just has to be her own hero

Mirror

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Re: This Job and Dating Sites.
« Reply #20 on: 25 September 2018, 08:58:27 am »
'Match.com has a strange policy: allows men with sun glasses but want women to show their faces fully.  Strange site packed with guys who simply want to sleep with you and ask you with a straight face even after a glass, so I gave it a miss.  Not worth it.'

Talking of which I met a guy recently who seemed nice. The date went okay, not brilliant, but okay.

But he then text me to say he couldn't see me again because 1, My hair was a different colour and style to the one in my photo which he knew BEFORE we met and 2, I used a different username on Match to that of my real name. I told him this when we met.

He was keen to reassure me that this was the ONLY reason he didn't want to see me again. (I didn't tell him about my job, seemed like he had enough to cope with the different hair and the name  ::))

Another guy called Ajamdonut has viewed my profile. Yeah, sure, of course that's his real name.

Honestly, I'm laughing as I type. It's so ridiculous!

'She's a fake,
Sure, but she's a real fake,
On the make,
Making up for lost time ...
Just you wait,
Hey, give the girl a break ...
And a fifty dollar bill.'

 ;D ;D ;D

Might not be a good idea to write his username here.

Gypsy

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Re: This Job and Dating Sites.
« Reply #21 on: 25 September 2018, 05:59:35 pm »
Might not be a good idea to write his username here.

I made that username up and it wasn't the same person I met anyway  :)
These days there are no Prince Charmings. A girl just has to be her own hero

Rosesugar

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Re: This Job and Dating Sites.
« Reply #22 on: 28 September 2018, 04:49:52 pm »
I joined pof some years ago and  went on a date with a guy who clearly wasn't the one in the photo
I stood at Bond street tube  looking at this guy who kept looking at me.eventually he asked if I was  x .. then said I looked bigger in size , I was on one of my diet weeks so it didn't go down well .I cleared off went home and worked next day at least with clients  they don't insult me  !

Gypsy

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Re: This Job and Dating Sites.
« Reply #23 on: 28 September 2018, 06:18:17 pm »
I joined pof some years ago and  went on a date with a guy who clearly wasn't the one in the photo
I stood at Bond street tube  looking at this guy who kept looking at me.eventually he asked if I was  x .. then said I looked bigger in size , I was on one of my diet weeks so it didn't go down well .I cleared off went home and worked next day at least with clients  they don't insult me  !

Yeah, they'll use any excuse sometimes won't they?

I think my date's reaction was a bit OTT. He pushed and pushed to meet up before I had chance to tell him anything. Then I was honest about my name straight away on the first meeting. I could have understood his reaction more if it had been the sixth date in when I say - Oh, by the way, my name isn't this ... it's that. But apparently he doesn't have any flaws himself   ::)

The real reason ... I think I intimidate men. I'm strong, confident, have done loads for my age and I'm self sufficient. And there are loads of men who find this a turn off. I just wish I could find someone secure.
These days there are no Prince Charmings. A girl just has to be her own hero

VoluptuousCurves

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Re: This Job and Dating Sites.
« Reply #24 on: 29 September 2018, 03:38:01 pm »
The real reason ... I think I intimidate men. I'm strong, confident, have done loads for my age and I'm self sufficient. And there are loads of men who find this a turn off. I just wish I could find someone secure.

I have this problem also. (Although I'm not looking to date anyone so it's not really a problem right now, but you know what I mean.)

My last LTR he even said to me "I don't know what I can do for you, you don't seem to need me for anything!"
I said "Well no I don't NEED anything from you, I'm with you because I like you"  ???

My marriage broke down with similar issues. When I met my husband I was very confused, frightened of pretty much everything, very depressed and anxious, very needy emotionally, constantly seeking validation. My husband helped me so much in building up my confidence. But once my confidence was at a certain point, he started feeling insecure because I no longer NEEDED him. It was all downhill from there. During one argument he said "This always happens to me, I get with someone when they're weak and I help them be strong, then as soon as they are, they fuck off!" I said "So maybe you should ask yourself why you're attracted to women you perceive as weak, and threatened by women who are strong."

Anyway back on topic.
I currently have a FWB who is a former client. This works really well for me. We get on as people and he understands that I work and doesn't push me for more than I want to give. It's nice to have unpaid sex once a month or so!

I have considered getting on Tinder or similar but every time I think about the sheer amount of TIME involved in the whole messaging, meeting, checking boundaries, etc before even getting to the sex, I just go "nah".
And me, I am not a mess, I am a wilderness, yes
The undiscovered continent for you to undress

MWM

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Re: This Job and Dating Sites.
« Reply #25 on: 02 October 2019, 11:32:08 am »
Hello!

In a world where now it seems you find relationships & such via app’s, I was wondering what everyone’s thoughts are on using a dating app & being in this line of work? I mean, being recognised by a client, or recognising them, they’d see your real name, what you look like outside of work, etc.. Doesnt seem a great option really, in my opinion.

Although  I’m not really “looking” for a relationship, I had decided I was curious to try out a dating app for the first time (first and last, I’d say!)
I think the concept is very shallow and definitely not for me, which I already sort of knew before signing up, but anyway.
I did see a few of my clients on there which prompted me to remove myself immediately and wonder if they’d seen me on it. My real name, my real age, how far away from them I live, just really freaked me out and I actually - stupidly - hadn’t thought about that happening before signing up.

Does anyone here feel comfortable using one of these dating sites knowing that they could be spotted by a client? Has that ever happened? Or, for you, are these sites completely out of the question because of your job?

Kay

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Re: This Job and Dating Sites.
« Reply #26 on: 02 October 2019, 11:55:33 am »
I've got old but live profiles on two dating sites (though more of the sexual than hearts and flowers type) and one bloke has contacted me saying he's worked out I'm also an escort. I kept them going in case I was tempted to look for someone after relocating up north, but 18 months I still can't find the time or inclination to do so!
"There is no sin except stupidity" - Oscar Wilde

Mirror

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Re: This Job and Dating Sites.
« Reply #27 on: 02 October 2019, 05:54:48 pm »
I've got old but live profiles on two dating sites (though more of the sexual than hearts and flowers type) and one bloke has contacted me saying he's worked out I'm also an escort. I kept them going in case I was tempted to look for someone after relocating up north, but 18 months I still can't find the time or inclination to do so!

My experience 10 years ago is that quite a few punters/clients have dating site profiles.  One chatted me up knowing my job, then when I disclosed he told me he had been aware just playing a game.

I did have a couple of dates all of which were informed before we met, in the end I realised partners were right in front of my nose in real life. I didn't need the sites, and yes they took up a lot of time.

CurlsnCurves

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Re: This Job and Dating Sites.
« Reply #28 on: 04 October 2019, 09:21:23 pm »
I have had guys say oh I recognise you from aw, you escort. Then try it on. Of course no way they were my type and I ignored them.

Not on those sites now but maybe have extremely old profiles on one or two I have long forgotten login details to.

Never found men who wanted anything other than sex whilst I always wanted a proper romantic relationship so I gave up. It was the same as escorting but for no pay, no point in that. I don't like being used.

I think the only two I did end up dating turned out to be a porn addict with ED so that didnt last long (cuddles n couples stuff but no sex at all....how ironic, we ate instead, no damn good when you want to lose weight) and a guy who wasnt capable of keeping his dick in his pants n cheated, and in fact was a serial cheater even throughout his later marriage, some guys never change. The rest have all been hook ups backs in the days I was happy fucking for a bit of fun and ex punters. Although one relationship that did work well for 6 months was with a guy I met through aw by putting up a blog saying I was after someone to take me swinging that weekend. He responded and was okay and became my boyfriend. We had lots of fun, it was mainly me doing the swinging, he knew I escorted n was fine with it but ultimately I didnt love him and decided I wanted to not have restrictions put on me when we swung (no full sex, only oral), so I ended it. And ironically that ended me swinging too as I could never get to the clubs as I don't drive! I was bored of him though so it didnt matter.

I wish I had had the 'problem' of guys who were looking for serious relationships and marriage.....although not the kids thank you very much. They never wanted more than a fuck for the night or a fuck buddy though worse luck and more to the point the more recent guys frequently catfished me or went quiet when the day of the first meet came around. I never even got to leave my front door and go on a date the last time I tried. Fucking useless and a massive waste of time. I have no idea why men lead women down the garden path and then do that?

I do think punters definitely are on those sites though, in fact I know they are. Why they think they have the right to contact a girl and tell her theyve seen her on aw though pisses me off. I have even been thrown off sites cos they were told I was soliciting....I was looking for a bloody partner, nothing to do with work and that was clear in my profile too. That really angered me. Like I am not allowed to have or want a partner because of my work? Its terrible how some men think.

So I would just be aware of the pitfalls of online dating.

Harriet_Lille

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Re: This Job and Dating Sites.
« Reply #29 on: 26 October 2019, 10:45:37 pm »
I don't work in the exact area where I live but of course with dating sites you cast quite a wide net when it comes to radius search. I don't really use dating sites at the moment. I go hot and cold with them and at the moment I'm cold. I have seen a few clients that I have seen on some but I managed to block them quickly, otherwise it was a dead end with what I was looking for.

This job and dating isn't entirely compatible unless you get lucky in my opinion.