I definitely win the big prize for the most gross client EVER!
So, I've been a bit skint lately, having given this up at my mother"s insistence..she may feel that she has a point!
OK, OK, OK... where do I begin?
The prized gentleman in question first pestered me to meet him in a car. No problem if that's what you do, I don't... we are all making a living.
I saved his number in my phone as a "nuisance" because he wouldn't drop it.
Anyway, some months later and me skint, I responded to him again.
It didn't smell right and I shouldn't have but I had no money and actually needed to.
Fast forward, he gave me taxi money, my top outcall rate and sent the cash over in advance. I checked him on G@@gle Maps and it looked like it wasn't a dump. (set up an alternative Payplal or bank account for privacy ladies, keep yourself safe!!!!)
Anyway, I rock up, the place is in disarray, I mean, gross, disgusting, filthy. Kids toys everywhere and just crap, all over the place.
I needed the money, I really did. I asked if he had showered, he said that he had but when I went into his bathroom to change I could see that the shower was dry.
He then wanted to do stuff downstairs, amongst the kids toys and I suggested that we move upstairs.
He told me that he had not slept and had been "on it" all night,
The bed was badly unmade and when I got onto it there were dirty baby wipes on top of it.
Obviously I didn't do much for him, a covered BJ and a hand shandy before I left.
If it hadn't been for desperation Id've walked but it was £200.
He just called again yesterday and asked me to come over again and I said that I would need him to promise that he would change the bedding, have a shower and brush his teeth.
He tried to kiss me in the last meeting and I literally gagged, I was definitely not going down below as he was clearly lying about the shower.
So, he said that he was sorry about last time, he had been a bit worse for wear and would be showered and have minty fresh teeth and a clean bed.... I said, "ok" we have all had our moments..... and here's the punchline..
He asked if I would be COOL with his sons being in the next room as they are really heavy sleepers!!!!!
What utter disrespect, mostly to his family but to me also.
It wasn't a hard decision, I'd rather starve.