Pmsl. I had one text a few days ago saying 'remember me?' Saw him well over a year ago, I just replied 'sorry mate, slept a few times since then' ego crushed.

I don't even remember them two days later when they come back 

Pmsl. I had one text a few days ago saying 'remember me?' Saw him well over a year ago, I just replied 'sorry mate, slept a few times since then' ego crushed.

Even when they contact me on the same number and I have reference to full sometimes copious hints and tips about them, I still often can't remember them until the follow up booking is well under way 
Saw one a couple of weeks ago. Had visited him several times before in 2018.
 Followed my notes where I should park etc, arrived.. and it was just another bald bloke in his late 50's..Wouldn't have recognised him if I tripped over him. About halfway through, it's usually something technical that rings a distant bell 

Not knowing your rates after they've seen you a number of times.

Just seen one for half hour that said "how much, £70?"

I said err, no it's £90 and he said "oh has it always been £90? Have you had a price increase?"

I told him it has always been £90. Perhaps his memory isn't that great or he's mixing me up with someone else... or just trying it on 

Yes he's trying it on.

Guys who keep emailing afer a booking saying they are planning to visit again on such and such a day but the the email goes on to say " hope you enjoyed when I did such and such last time, hope you could tell how much I enjoyed it" bla bla bla.. I'm not going to be blowing smoke up some guys ass about his performance.. it's not fucking Tinder!
FFS just make the booking already and hand over the cash 
And guess what, the day arrives... and no booking... I just don't have time for their attention seeking shit!
It is totally draining!

Maybe others noticing this more..
Couple regs making comments / hints about price rises and they might not get to see me as much with extra costs etc etc etc.
I just reply with something like ‘don’t worry my prices aren’t going up!’
But regs especially should know better.

Yes I've had this too, they are just trying it on hoping that you will offer a discount due to all the "price rises".
Do they think we are somehow magically exempt from said price rises.
Stick to your guns and your rates, they'll either continue their visits at the same regularity or they wont but in the case that they don't, rest assured others will take their place.

I just saw a guy who literally wanted everything I don't offer which I clearly state on my profile. At first I thought is he taking the piss then started to wander if he's the type that plays games trying to get you to do stuff you don't like.

The booking became a bit uncomfortable in the end and then tried to blame it all on me making sarcastic comments.

Had a guy tell me they were on there way and proceed to show up, even after I told them I had to cancel due to illness. Not sure if they thought I was faking it or something, but I feel like death today and can't even get out of bed! Ended up having to get my hubby to tell them I wasn't in.

I can’t stand when after doing it once, they wait until 5 minutes before the end of the booking to say “can we have a round 2 ?” 
I sometimes accept if the client was nice otherwise I just decline and say that we don’t have time.

Him (new number not saved on my phone) 'oh Hi I saw you last year I was the guy who made you squirt'
Me - 'sorry that doesn't narrow it down at all'.
Worked out who he was, saw almost a year ago...