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Author Topic: The Winning Spam Mail of the weekend!  (Read 3421 times)

LondonEvie

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The Winning Spam Mail of the weekend!
« on: 27 June 2009, 11:28:32 am »

I got a real winner this morning, anyone else have this one? Looks like it was sent to about two dozen escorts if the cc: is anything to go by. I get them so infrequently that it tickles me when I do.

 

Thank you for not deleting this email right away. While you and I may not know each other, what I want to tell you is important enough for me to want to contact you.  But don?t worry, I obtained your email address off of the internet and will not contact you again unless you reply.


I assure you that this is not a solicitation or a scam of any kind. I do not want to sell you anything or sign you up for anything. My hope is that you will continue to read the email. My hope is that, in the end, you will see this letter as so much more than "spam."

 

The reason for the email you see, is that I used to be trapped in sexual addiction. I used to visit with service providers and am familiar with the emotional pain that some of you are in and are trying to fill with sex.  I am also quite aware of some of your financial reasons for doing this.  I am also aware of the dangers that you put yourself into everytime that you see someone, and I don't want anything to happen to you.  Jesus Christ rescued me from a life of sexual sin and depravity and I want to share the Gospel with you. You might have heard it before, but I doubt you've heard it put quite like this.  Keep in mind that I am not judging you.  I am just opening your eyes to what God tells us.

 

The Bible says in Hebrews 9:27 that ?it?s appointed for every man once to die, and then judgment.? What that means is that everyone dies once and is then judged before Almighty God. So, if you are standing before God on Judgment Day, are you going to heaven or hell? Have you been a good person? You might think so but, unfortunately though, we aren?t going to be judged by any human standard of goodness. There is only one standard by which we can all be judged and that standard is God?s Law, also known as the Ten Commandments. The Bible says in Romans 2:15 that God ?has written the law upon the heart of every man in the form of our conscience? so that when we die and face him, we will have no excuse.

I've already admitted to you that I am a sinner, so let?s go through them real quick for you. Have you ever broken the 9th commandment by lying? Of course you have. A person who does that is called a liar. Have you ever broken the 8th commandment and stolen anything (regardless of value)? A person who does that is called a thief. What about the 6th commandment against murder? Jesus also says that whoever hates a person, without cause, has committed murder in his heart. Have you ever hated anyone? If you?re like most people, at this point you are a lying, thieving, murdering adulterer at heart standing before a just and holy God.

At this point, you might be saying to yourself, I don?t believe in God, Heaven, or Hell. I say that it doesn?t matter what you believe. Let?s say that someone held you up at gunpoint, would you laugh at him and say "I don't believe in guns!"?  Of course not! That?s because your disbelief doesn?t negate reality and believe me, GOD IS REAL. Or are you willing to bet your eternal life on it?

Or, you might be saying to yourself, ?I don?t believe that God would judge us so harshly. My god is a god of love and forgiveness and would never send anyone to Hell?. You are right. Your god would not send anyone to Hell because he doesn't exist! What you've just done is broken the 2nd commandment against idolatry. When you create a god in your mind to suit yourself, you are turning your back on the real God. Have you ever broken the 3rd commandment by using our Creator?s name in vain as a four-letter cuss word? That?s called blasphemy and is very serious in God?s eyes.

So, if you are still reading this then you?ve probably said, ?That?s impossible! No one can live up to the standard of the Ten Commandments.? You are right. No one can. Man is not perfect. We were born into sin and have a sinful nature. God is so holy and so perfect that his standard is unattainable to mortal men. You might say, but that?s not fair! What about forgiveness? God is supposed to forgive us of our sins. What about all of the good things that I?ve done in my life?


Well, let?s look at an example. What if you were in a courtroom standing before a judge and you had just been convicted of murder. You did it. You?re guilty and all that's left is for the judge to render his sentence: $500,000 or death. You can?t just say to the judge ?Your honor. I just wanted to say that you are a good man and that I know you will forgive me of my crime. Besides, what about all the other good things I've done in my life?? What?s the judge going to say? If he is a good judge then he?s going to send you to the electric chair. He might want to be merciful, but he can't just set you free, the law demands a penalty. Since God is a good judge and because he is so good and so holy, he has no choice but to send you to Hell.  The law demands a penalty and the Bible says in Romans 6:23 that ?the wages of sin is DEATH?.


But, here?s where your story takes a turn for the good. You are about to be lead away in shackles when all of a sudden, someone comes into the courtroom and pays your $500,000 fine. The judge then sees that the requirement of the law has been fulfilled. And since you?ve met the requirements, you are now free to go! That?s what Jesus Christ did for all of us when he died on the cross 2000 years ago. Jesus Christ came to earth, God in human form, born of a virgin, lived a perfect and blameless life, was crucified on the cross, and then rose from the dead three days later as a payment for our sins. All we have to do is accept the payment and we are free from eternal damnation!

How do we accept the payment? All that is required from us is to ask God for forgiveness, repent (turn away) from our sins, and then trust in the Lord Jesus Christ with all of our hearts (Romans 10:9). When we do that, Jesus Christ washes away all of our sins and we can now stand before God blameless on Judgment Day. Then read your Bible and obey it, join a local church and be baptized. God will make you into a new person with new wants and desires.  He doesn?t want to send you to Hell, He loves you. You've probably heard John 3:16 "For God so loved the world that he gave his only begotten Son, that whosoever believes in Him, will not perish but have eternal life."

Well, that?s it. Thank you for reading all the way through. I thank you for your time and my prayer is that you will consider all that you?ve read and seek Jesus Christ for eternal life today.  Don?t wait for tomorrow because we never know when we will be taken from this earth and now that you've read this email you are without excuse when you stand before God.


cassie

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Re: The Winning Spam Mail of the weekend!
« Reply #1 on: 27 June 2009, 02:36:45 pm »
OMG, have the Jehova's witnesses infiltrated the internet?

hahaha.

You are obviously an evil sinner and need to be saved, Evie!
Live your life in such a way that when your feet hit the ground in the morning, Satan shudders and says: "Oh shit, she's awake!"

Anika Mae

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Re: The Winning Spam Mail of the weekend!
« Reply #2 on: 27 June 2009, 03:25:17 pm »
Boring. He should have put it into an accessible cartoon format.

LondonEvie

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Re: The Winning Spam Mail of the weekend!
« Reply #3 on: 27 June 2009, 04:09:30 pm »
Boring. He should have put it into an accessible cartoon format.

My Braaaaiiiins.  This should be on Kirk Cameron's website, though I suspect ink or possibly cartoons or both are sins.  :D

Lilly1230

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Re: The Winning Spam Mail of the weekend!
« Reply #4 on: 27 June 2009, 05:39:34 pm »
Ah bless them, you got to love this single minded, non questioning approach to Christianity. Let's target the prostitutes and "cure" them without questioning the consequences of riding the world of us "service providers" (I do dislike that term). Let's save sex for procreation and ignore the fact that God gave us beautiful bodies capable of pleasure and pleasuring.

Excuse me, my soap box needs dismantling.

Lilly x

Violette

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Re: The Winning Spam Mail of the weekend!
« Reply #5 on: 28 June 2009, 09:10:47 am »
I am sorry I lost interest after he mentioned Jesus.
Funny story from my window days, there was the Billy Graham Revival Convention in town! I mean of all the cities in the world to come to visit? Amsterdam! Well, guess what load of these bible thumping idiots came out in droves. I mean we were doing a brisk business! One guy, was walking down the street praising god, and just making a nuisance of himself. I had had enough, I yelled to him, "Go get screwed, so you can have something to pray about." I got busy and forgot all about him, until later, a colleague of mine came over for a cup of coffee and a chat, and told me about the nutter she had that kept asking Jesus to forgive him with every stroke!  ???

brandy@saafe

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Re: The Winning Spam Mail of the weekend!
« Reply #6 on: 29 June 2009, 07:49:23 pm »
Yeah, I came home to that one this afternoon. I haven't received a fire and brimstone "I can save you" email in some years now. It brings back memories.

anonymoussw

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Re: The Winning Spam Mail of the weekend!
« Reply #7 on: 29 June 2009, 10:19:08 pm »
What a load of twoddle

Since God is a good judge and because he is so good and so holy, he has no choice but to send you to Hell. 

No choice for an omnipotent god? Surely not...
If you can fill the unforgiving minute
With sixty seconds' worth of distance run,
Yours is the Earth and everything that's in it,
And - which is more - you'll be a Man, my son!
"if" - Rudyard Kipling

Dianomite

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Re: The Winning Spam Mail of the weekend!
« Reply #8 on: 02 July 2009, 09:44:32 pm »
Goes on a bit doesn't it?!!
Oh dear.
I really don't get religion!

Welsh Lass

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Re: The Winning Spam Mail of the weekend!
« Reply #9 on: 03 July 2009, 10:07:07 am »
I am sure there was a guy on the telly the other day going on about how he paid a fortune to an escort and now has found God and is cured. I swear he was on Lorraine on GMTV - Unless it was all a vivid dream!
I was behind the couch at the time looking for my Maynard's ''special edition'' black gum that had fallen out of the ''special edition'' red and black Maynard's gum box and when I realised what I was actually listening to I popped up to take a look but he was gone! Darn it.
I found the black gum covered in dust, the underneath of my couch is like a desert full of tumbleweed! I decided to ignore that, pretend like it was super clean under there, put the gum in bin and continue on with the rest of the box - lovely they were as well!   I can only eat sweets while the children are at school as they scoff the lot normally, that is why I was on the couch eating them so early in the morning! Figured I would then have all day to work off the fat. But then realised there is no fat in a gum sweet, it's all sugar, why am I too old for sugar rushes? If I had given all those sweets the the kids they would be bouncing off the walls, all I did was doze until midday then got up and did some work! It's not fair!  :P
They're working on Viagra for women. Are they crazy? That's been around for hundreds of years - its called cash... Alonzo Boden.