SAAFE forum
General Category => Blather and Babble => Topic started by: carmen1988 on 09 June 2013, 04:17:53 am
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do you find this word offensive? i do
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Not at all it is just a word. What you choose to call yourself is all that matters at the end of the day. People don't seem to think there is a difference between sex workers we are all the same receiving payment for sexual services as far as they are concerned, therefore we are all prostitutes.
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Well we are all prostitutes, just as other sex workers are lapdancers, webcammers or porn models or whatever - it's the correct English word for people who exchange sex for money and is no more an offensive term than plumber or trapeze artist.
It does mystify me when people who are perfectly happy to be prostitutes/engage in prostitution get sniffy about the semantics. I'm very happy to be a prostitute - it's been a very rewarding job for me, and since there's nothing wrong with what I do I'd like to think that filters out to those around me and shows there's nothing wrong with being a prostitute :).
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do you find this word offensive?
Why be offended by the truth? I take money for sexual favours therefore I am a prostitute.
Now call me "Hun" "Dear" or "Sweetie" and I WILL be offended.
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do you find this word offensive?
Why be offended by the truth? I take money for sexual favours therefore I am a prostitute.
Now call me "Hun" "Dear" or "Sweetie" and I WILL be offended.
Oh come on babes, I mean really hun, I don't see what's wrong with that at all sweetie!
Sorry, I can't stand it either, or "Darling" for that matter.
As for prostitute, it's what we are.
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do you find this word offensive?
Why be offended by the truth? I take money for sexual favours therefore I am a prostitute.
Now call me "Hun" "Dear" or "Sweetie" and I WILL be offended.
Ha Ha, I feel the same about being called 'babe'. In fact I would prefer it if they referred to me as prostitute!
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Hi,
No, it does not bother me at all. However, I must admit that if it was used in a way caused to offend it may ruffle my feathers briefly, very briefly.
H x
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do you find this word offensive?
Why be offended by the truth? I take money for sexual favours therefore I am a prostitute.
Now call me "Hun" "Dear" or "Sweetie" and I WILL be offended.
Ha Ha, I feel the same about being called 'babe'. In fact I would prefer it if they referred to me as prostitute!
Girl is my hate, no idea why, guess because I am now far from one?
H x
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do you find this word offensive?
Why be offended by the truth? I take money for sexual favours therefore I am a prostitute.
Now call me "Hun" "Dear" or "Sweetie" and I WILL be offended.
Ha Ha, I feel the same about being called 'babe'. In fact I would prefer it if they referred to me as prostitute!
Girl is my hate, no idea why, guess because I am now far from one?
H x
It's patronising, like all the other irritating expressions.
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I think the OP was talking about words used to describe or 'define' us rather than terms used as forms of address, to be fair (and like most people I'd rather just be addressed by my name than some poorly spelt Txt Spk delight).
No, it does not bother me at all. However, I must admit that if it was used in a way caused to offend it may ruffle my feathers briefly, very briefly.
I think this is the key thing - if somebody wants to be derogatory and rude it doesn't really matter which word they choose, and any word can be an insult because it's the context and intent that's causing the offence. That said, I detest being called an 'escort'.
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..................... I detest being called an 'escort'.
Im with you on that one amy.
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Ha Ha, I feel the same about being called 'babe'. In fact I would prefer it if they referred to me as prostitute!
I prefer it to escort. Sometimes I use escort in casual conversation. But if I'm talking to a guy who I think may be a possible client I use prostitute every time. Just so that there is no doubt. I quite enjoy seeing the reaction too. It can be a surprisingly good chat up line.
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A prostitute is someone who works in public places like brothels, an escort who works secretly using internet...
Practically I do not see any difference...
Sometime I would like to shout these words in a supermarket just to see people's reactions:
"People, I am here and I am an escort, a prostitute, a slut, a bitch or whichever of the words you choose.... the truth is that I exchange sex for money and I am very proud of my job" ;D ;D ;D
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A prostitute is someone who works in public places like brothels, an escort who works secretly using internet...
Practically I do not see any difference...
Not at all Pearl.
A prostitute can work ANYWHERE she likes, the definition (meaning) of the word prostitute is "someone who has sex for money/offers sexual favours for money". It has absolutely NOTHING to do with where she has the sex or offers the sexual favours.
As for "works secretly using the internet" well that got to be the best joke on the forum. There aint anything secretive about the way us prostitutes work.
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A prostitute is someone who works in public places like brothels, an escort who works secretly using internet...
Practically I do not see any difference...
An escort is a companion. That's the historic meaning. It's a word that has become a euphemism for prostitute. It has both meanings. That's why I don't like it.
Sometime I would like to shout these words in a supermarket just to see people's reactions:
"People, I am here and I am an escort, a prostitute, a slut, a bitch or whichever of the words you choose....
I don't like slut or Bitch either. Slut is just a woman who is promiscuous, bitch is a female dog.
Prostitute is a useful word to use at the right moment. I've had guys struggle to compose themselves when I've told them. Many times I've had a guy who's taking an obvious shine to me ask what I do at work, and I just tell them straight. I love the reactions which vary from cool to complete surprise. Many's the time it's resulted in an immediate booking.
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Well we are all prostitutes, just as other sex workers are lapdancers, webcammers or porn models or whatever - it's the correct English word for people who exchange sex for money and is no more an offensive term than plumber or trapeze artist.
It does mystify me when people who are perfectly happy to be prostitutes/engage in prostitution get sniffy about the semantics. I'm very happy to be a prostitute - it's been a very rewarding job for me, and since there's nothing wrong with what I do I'd like to think that filters out to those around me and shows there's nothing wrong with being a prostitute :).
I agree. Sometimes you have to laugh when you read comments on some blogs having a paddy about being called a prostitute and snottily reminding clients that they are not a prostitute because they don't do x,y,z so therefore they are better than a prostitute. I think to myself keep telling yourself that. When your neighbour or whoever finds out what you do they are not going to refer to you as an escort or courtesan they are going refer to you as a plain prostitute no matter how you see yourself and want to deny that you are a prostitute.
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do you find this word offensive?
Why be offended by the truth? I take money for sexual favours therefore I am a prostitute.
Now call me "Hun" "Dear" or "Sweetie" and I WILL be offended.
Ha Ha, I feel the same about being called 'babe'. In fact I would prefer it if they referred to me as prostitute!
Girl is my hate, no idea why, guess because I am now far from one?
H x
OMG, I hate being called "baby girl", it makes me want to poke them in the eye with a sharp stick, and point out that it's been over 40 years since I resembled anything like a "baby".
GRRR!
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I don't mind "prostitute", or "escort". I even refer to myself as "a prozzie" when talking about my sexy-sex-for-cash job with Mr Cat (even when I'm talking about camming or doing new pics for my profile). It kind of helps strengthen the line beween sex-for-fun and sex-for-work too, for both of us.
Of course, there's a world of difference between someone calling me a "sexy prostitute" and a "dirty prostitute", but then any word can be an insult (or a compliment) in the wrong (or right) hands.
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There is nothing better than watching a range of emotions on someones face when they have just been told that you are a prostitute.... Panfaced , incredulous, outrage, intrigued , but almost all have a grudging admiration!! Ha love it :)
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a prostitute has to have sex i dont have sex unless i fancy the guy i just have drink then go oops
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a prostitute has to have sex i dont have sex unless i fancy the guy i just have drink then go oops
Carmen, as you have had money for sex (whether you fancy the guy or not) makes you a prostitute.
As for the bit of your post that I have not highlighted in red, I would be ashamed to admit that to myself never mind on an open forum.
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At first I wasn't comfortable with the word prostitute, don't know why but I do know my sources of information always used the word 'Escort', and disliked the 'P' word so perhaps that's why along with the media images I had of street workers. I now know prostitute is a name which does apply to me as well as anyone else exchanging money for sex. I also know the time and companionship disclaimer doesn't mean a thing.
Lots of clients and even some of my friends don't like to use what I sometimes refer to as the 'P' word, they find it offensive, or 'don't like to think of you in that way'. I suspect their feelings on this come from a a mixture of things including the fact it's a taboo subject in society. To engage a 'prostitute' :o is considered wrong. When disclosing my occupation I use a mixture of Escort, sex worker and if someone really isn't familiar with what it really entails I'll say I'm a prostitute. The only difference between me and someone on the street or brothel is that clients phone or email to book an appointment, and the sheenanigans goes on indoors.
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Lady Lust i am not a prostitute i have never been paid for sex
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The word prostitute doesn't bother me at all I see it as being ashamed of the word is being ashamed of what you do.
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Just Sussed your profile, apart from giving your tits away for free, how does one perform owo for a fee of ?120 an hour and not be a prostitute, and performing sexual acts on webcam in exchange for cash is what exactly? Don't mean to be harsh but it's little pot calling kettle black don't you think?
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Lots of clients and even some of my friends don't like to use what I sometimes refer to as the 'P' word, they find it offensive, or 'don't like to think of you in that way'. I suspect their feelings on this come from a a mixture of things including the fact it's a taboo subject in society. To engage a 'prostitute' :o is considered wrong.
I've experienced the same. I have no problem with calling myself a prostitute, to me it's not a derogatory term in the slightest, but I have seen people (friends, family and clients) get offended when I refer to myself as such. They'd rather I stick with 'escort'.
I can't say I really understand why anybody would bother too much with the title - courtesan, escort, prostitute, call girl, working girl etc - they all entail the same thing - sucking cock for cash. I know it's about marketing to a certain extent but I also think a part of it is to do with people trying to establish hierarchies - courtesans think they're better than escorts, escorts think their better off than parlour girls and parlour girls look down their noses at street girls. But we all essentially do the same thing.
I find it a bit amusing to be honest and I think if you have to play silly games like that then you're probably not as happy with your chosen occupation as you would like others to think. :)
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do you find this word offensive? i do
Nope - because I'm a High Class Courtesan who's shit don't stink, and my pee is Golden ;D
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well for 25 years i have been a prostitute ...when i was 15 and worked on the streets the law classed me as an under age prostitute and 25 years later its what i still am!!! just in a better place and have had a fantastic life from it :) not ashamed or offended.. look it up in an dictionary and its the same all over...if you sell sex for money then your a prostitute. :)
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So in your previous post you write the following
hello guys im carmen iv always worked for london escort agencies and iv just bnecome 100% independant i do webcamming and escorting on aw i like being independant but i always make sure i have a driver for security reasons luckily i was able to meet a great driver/friend who i worked with at the agencies.................. hello all x
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Lady Lust i am not a prostitute i have never been paid for sex
Im confused Are you a prostitute who is paid for sex or a prostitute who never gets paid for sex If its the latter then i suggest you start asking guys for the money upfront Make life so much easier
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I don't care what I get called, prostitute, escort, whore etc as long as I get paid.
I have to admit when I first started I was confused about what the difference in all the terms meant. Where did I fit in, which one was I. I soon realised that there was no real difference just words that meant the same thing.
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a prostitute has to have sex i dont have sex unless i fancy the guy i just have drink then go oops
No we don't, if that was the case we would all see the guy who turns up under the influence or the guy with only half our fee, or the guy with obvious signs of an sti/std, or the guy giving out danger vibes. Just like anyone we can say NO, we don't HAVE to have sex just because we are prostitutes/escorts/ whores/tarts or whatever else people want to call us.
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I don't care what I get called, prostitute, escort, whore etc as long as I get paid.
I have to admit when I first started I was confused about what the difference in all the terms meant. Where did I fit in, which one was I. I soon realised that there was no real difference just words that meant the same thing.
Exactly!! As long as your paying you can even call me Al if you like. A client called me a hooker the other day, he wanted to marry me (first time I had ever met him) but I had to stop being a hooker first.. ::). I almost laughed as I havent heard that word in years.
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I must admit to disliking it as well. :-[
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If it walks like a duck, quacks like a duck, sure as fk ................... it is a duck ;D ::)
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I am a prostitute and proud of what I do. I work hard, I give a good service so why should I not be proud.
prostitute is just my job title same as hooker, prossie, whore, harlot, lady of the night etc etc etc
It is just the actual name of what we do. I exchange sexual services for cash. That is defined by the word prostitute. An escort is someone who accompanies people to functions but offers no intimacy at all. Not even kissing. So I am not an escort.
I don't see why some women get so upset about their job title. It is what it is. If you are willing to sell sex then you cannot be offended by people using the correct term for what you do.
If people try to use it to upset me in an offensive manner then it doesn't matter what word they use or what they call me it is the tone and intent that pisses me off. Calling me a prostitute even in an offensive way wont upset me though as I am one and I don't find it a dirty or disgusting job so they cannot make the term offensive for me
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do you find this word offensive? i do
I don't especially when clients call me a prostitute because this is what am doing selling a horny time. Not ashamed of what I have become, fully understanding it was my choice to be labelled as one by doing this. I feel good about my position.
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your all right i am a prostitute and i hate my job i feel awful about the word and i camnt accept it i find it very offensive i preferf the word escort ..... i try to avoid having sex because i hate it i only do it for the money also i would just like to confirm to the member who said i show my tits for free on aw carmen1988 is not my aw username its something else....
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i try to avoid having sex because i hate. it i only do it for the money
Then why are you in this business? There are other ways to make money that don't involve having sex when you obviously don't want to. Sooner or later your clients will realise your not into it and go elsewhere.
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I think it is rather unfortunate if you have chosen a user name for SAAFE that someone else has as a profile name on AW. Especially one with the same year after it. Perhaps a slight name change would be a good thing and it may save a lot of confusion, not just for yourself but also for everyone.
If you feel so bad about the job then perhaps it is time for a change or a break. If you cant feel good about yourself with doing the job then it is going to come through in the work that you do and you are going to put clients off.
Perhaps time to re-think things to make yourself happy. There is no fun being in a job that you appear to despise so much.
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lady lust didnt think people would investigate on aw its quite sad,,,,, im definately quitting this year im training to be a dom so hopefully thats better for me
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lady lust didnt think people would investigate on aw its quite sad,,,,, im definately quitting this year im training to be a dom so hopefully thats better for me
I agree with the first bit but it's a fact, and whilst nobody here means any harm it's as well to remember that this forum is public and there are plenty of other people out there with nothing better to do than make mischief. You can easily change your displayed forum name here on your profile if you want to :).
I agree with everybody that it's not an ideal situation to be in any job you don't like, but that doesn't mean there's anything wrong with the job or anything wrong with you for doing it - everybody needs money and you're doing something lots of people wouldn't be prepared to do to feed and support yourself. If you're taking practical steps to learn something related which would suit you better then that's great (although if you're a pro domme the law still says you're a prostitute ;)).
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The term "prostitute" is a very tricky one because the official definition is: "Person who sells sex in exchange for money". That's fine. But if we where to use the term in an literal way what happens with all the ladies who date or marry for money? (A huge amount of them). As far as I know many women sell themselves to one man at a time and the only thing that makes them different to me is said time they spent with each guy. I mean.. I have a "bigger turn over" of guys than the uber Botoxed Belgravia wives who live in my street that for sure but we're both on our knees giving blowjobs in exchange of dough at the end of the day. We're both prostitutes, but somehow society wants to make me believe she's a respectable wife and I'm a hooker.
F*ck.
That.
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Well the law doesn't use the term in the 'literal' way, and since this is a sex work forum and the thread is discussing sex work we'll stick with the original subject.
To say that anybody who benefits financially from an arrangement which includes sex is a prostitute is just silly, and tedious comparisons to greedy civvy women (and one feature difference of actual prostitutes is that we tell you how much it's going to cost in total before anything happens) has nothing to do with the OP's question and isn't helpful, and nor is judging other people because of what some mythical 'society' may or may not think of us and what we do.
Back on topic.
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do you find this word offensive? i do
The OP opened the thread asking if we found this word offensive and I was trying to point out the double morality of such "term". I know the law thinks it's totally fine for a lady to date a guy she would never give the time of the day if he didn't had a ten digit amount of money in his bank account. And yes. this has nothing to do with sex work (I know) but it has to do with the "offensiveness" of the word "prostitute".
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Well that's all very well, but then we're getting into whether your average 40 hour a week wage slave is 'prostituting themselves' to Tesco when they go to stack shelves or whatever, which may or may not be the case but is also nothing to do with the thread topic.
Either way, discussing and speculating about the supposed motivations of people who are nothing to do with sex work and not part of the forum (and therefore cannot contribute to the discussion) is bad form, so we're not going to do it.
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lady lust didnt think people would investigate on aw its quite sad,,,,, im definately quitting this year im training to be a dom so hopefully thats better for me
No, not sad at all, you made a public statement that you are not a prostitute and never have been plus bantered around all sorts of claims that what you do is not prostitution, I was just making a counter claim against your misguided public statement that you have never worked as a prostitute.
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No, not sad at all, you made a public statement that you are not a prostitute and never have been plus bantered around all sorts of claims that what you do is not prostitution, I was just making a counter claim against your misguided public statement that you have never worked as a prostitute.
Claire, the OP has since posted this (http://www.saafe.info/main/index.php?topic=15247.msg119145#msg119145), in case you missed it - I would say that it clears things up more than adequately. Move on, please.
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I think that whichever term is used, depend on how people say it... I do not find the terms offensive because depend on the context. Even the term "stupid" can be either offensive or something lovely.
A thing is: "You are really stupid" + :) ;)"
Another thing is: "You are really stupid" + >:( :FF"
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anybody who refers to themselves as prostitute an has no problem is different from you because they dont have morals i think the term is degrading and should only be used for street walkers
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anybody who refers to themselves as prostitute an has no problem is different from you because they dont have morals i think the term is degrading and should only be used for street walkers
I have morals it's just that some actually don't view it as a horrible thing. Many of society few it as degrading so you will need to either deal with or or get out of this game. It is what it is regardless of one denying it to themselves. I'm not deluded. I am not ashamed of being a prosy and love myself. It was my choice doing this and still is fun. Street workers some don't have a choice, lets clarify that one. Also we are all human beings so no one is better than anybody else. So some one like you just said that we mustn't have morals bla bla. Well you must be narrow minded sound to me like you don't enjoy this. See.... It's not nice playing mystic meg. Only talk for your own circumstances not others especially what they think. Now that is completely messed up.
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Just for the avoidance of any confusion, 'sexystephanie' and the deleted (shortly before reregistering) OP are one and the same.
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anybody who refers to themselves as prostitute an has no problem is different from you because they dont have morals i think the term is degrading and should only be used for street walkers
So you come here and use two different user names to try and accuse the majority of us of having no morals as most of us know that money for sex, be it in a 5* hotel, a private house or on the street is prostitution. That does not mean we have no morals. It means we understand what the word actually means and are sensible and mature enough to understand that is what we do.
Street walkers are called street walkers and most do not do this job for fun or pin money but for need and I am afraid morals do not come into it when it comes down to need.
I have very good morals as do most women here yet we know we are prostitutes. Why is the term degrading? Is being called a Nurse degrading? After all it is just the name of a job.
You seem to forget it is what we do, NOT who we are. We work as prostitutes, we are not defined by that work. To be honest a lot of people would find it degrading to be called a cleaner (no disrespect as I have done that job before) as most people assume if you are a cleaner it is because you are unable to manage any other type of job. Same with working in a fast food place, to most that is degrading but again it is just a job.
You may not call yourself a prostitute but you can be sure that is what everyone else sees your job as, that is if you are even in this line of work
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Just for the avoidance of any confusion, 'sexystephanie' and the deleted (shortly before reregistering) OP are one and the same.
How conniving of the same poster to play these tactics, thanks for that Amy. It looks like we have a hater troll here. How sly the OP was being making a new account with a different name. Well the OP's ISP addressee is logged so silly move. It shows how clever the OP is.
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anybody who refers to themselves as prostitute an has no problem is different from you because they dont have morals i think the term is degrading and should only be used for street walkers
Morals? Anyone who does anything sexual for money is a prostitute. If you are taking money for sexual services, you are a prostitute.
It's not a degrading term, it's a job title. "Public Convenience Cleaner" - that's a job title, is that degrading? "Bin Man", "Street Sweeper", "Politician", "Fast Food Server", "Jounalist"...are these all degrading titles?
It's *just* a job. I have said before, I felt much more degraded (and more USED) in previous civvy employment (offices, shops etc) than I do now, being paid for getting my tits out on cam and sucking cock in 1-star hotels.
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No
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do you find this word offensive? i do
It means a woman who stands up or stands out, particularly a woman who acts out in the public domain.
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anybody who refers to themselves as prostitute an has no problem is different from you because they dont have morals i think the term is degrading and should only be used for street walkers
How do you dare to say that we do not have morals?
I have morals and I am also proud of my choices.
I consider "prostitute" as any other job title in this world... there are people who work as street cleaners, kitchen porters, etc... and despite we all know that behind "accepted" titles of these jobs, the jobs themselves are degrading and back-breacking. Nevertheless, these people work hard and with dignity therefore they deserve all my respect for what they do.
However, just for information, the term of prostitute is as old as the hills and it is derived from the Latin "prostituta".
Prostitutes in the ancient Rome would always work in the Lupanar (brothel) and these buildings can still be visited in Pompeii, Rome etc...
therefore, prostitutes in the Roman Empire were not street walkers
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From a wikipedia article Morality can also be seen as the collection of beliefs as to what constitutes a good life.
Good life to me means;
Supporting and looking after yourself whereever possible(financial, physical and mental/emotional health)
Don't steal
Don't harm others
I suppose accepting money to have sex with men who may have partners could be seen as harming others.
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I actually agree with Strawberry. You can do this job and have morals. Being a prostitute does NOT mean you don't have morals!
I have been one for a few years. I am also (I would like to think!) good and kind to people. I do not harm others. If a client bursts into tears or is upset during the booking, I am compassionate and kind (not that it's happened often thankfully!) I do my best to get through life, like others on here.
As someone else commented, being a "street walker" is the same thing, but most of them do it for different reasons. Sadly, a lot have drug habits to fund. But how do you know, underneath that addiction, they aren't good kind people, who have just got themselves into a bit of trouble and need some help?
I think I am straying off a bit from the post though lol. Personally the term prostitute doesn't bother me. I always think though, it's how it's said. For example, someone could say to someone who works in McDonald's "a fast food worker". That term isn't offensive, but I always think it's HOW you say it e.g. if someone says it in a stuck up way to make themselves sound better than you...
I think I'm really waffling now lol :-X
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I actually agree with Strawberry. You can do this job and have morals. Being a prostitute does NOT mean you don't have morals!
I have been one for a few years. I am also (I would like to think!) good and kind to people. I do not harm others. If a client bursts into tears or is upset during the booking, I am compassionate and kind (not that it's happened often thankfully!) I do my best to get through life, like others on here.
As someone else commented, being a "street walker" is the same thing, but most of them do it for different reasons. Sadly, a lot have drug habits to fund. But how do you know, underneath that addiction, they aren't good kind people, who have just got themselves into a bit of trouble and need some help?
I think I am straying off a bit from the post though lol. Personally the term prostitute doesn't bother me. I always think though, it's how it's said. For example, someone could say to someone who works in McDonald's "a fast food worker". That term isn't offensive, but I always think it's HOW you say it e.g. if someone says it in a stuck up way to make themselves sound better than you...
I think I'm really waffling now lol :-X
so do you want large fries with that... ?
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Inna, what on earth are you talking about
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I think I walked into that one lol ;D
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The word doesn't offend me. But I'd be pretty pissed to be called it in the street - I have a child.
People always think the worst of you and I don't need that kinda drama in our life's.
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The word doesn't offend me. But I'd be pretty pissed to be called it in the street - I have a child.
People always think the worst of you and I don't need that kinda drama in our life's.
I use it when I need to talk about what I do. Talking to a potential client for example. It's very clear and concise to most people, escort is too wishy washy and means different things to different people. I find a lot of men are excited by the word prostitute and it's often a deal maker. Their eyes tell you they are interested even when the rest of them (apart from the obvious) is pretending to be ambivalent. I have another job that I put when I have to fill in application forms and things like that. If I want to avoid embarrassing other people, like at social gatherings, I just say I do counseling as well as my other work. With my friends who know me I just refer to it as my whoring. That often raises a smile and when people overhear they usually think it's a joke.
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i think that alot of punters dont even like the word prostitute. i use it candidly in conversation and love seeing their face drop lol!
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Just for the avoidance of any confusion, 'sexystephanie' and the deleted (shortly before reregistering) OP are one and the same.
i reckon this was the work of a prostitutes ex boyfriend/friend, trying to have a misogynistic dig
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I'm under no illusions. The names all mean the same thing and I know what I am...
- I like the term "escort" or "sex worker" or "working girl"/"WG". I'm fine with "prostitute" though it seems a little clinical. I also really like "whore" for some reason, it kind of gets me off...
- For some reason I don't like the words "Pro$$ie"/"Prossie" or "Hooker", especially from clients (it doesn't bother me so much on here).
- Sometimes I wish for more exotic terms like "lady of the night" or "courtesan" or "scarlet harlot" just for kicks and giggles.
Anyone else have a similar thing or is it just me? If so, what do and don't you like to be called?
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I've merged this with one of the other threads on the topic, although there are more :).
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Thanks amy! Sorry for effectively digging up something that had already died!
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Oh, it's OK! It just saves the people who have already answered from doing so again if they can't be bothered, and if it wasn't for the same dozen or so topics coming up over and over again the whole place would be looking a bit thin :).
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I hated the word prostitute when I first started, now it doesn't bother me as much.
I quite like 'lady of the night', even though I'm usually a lunchtime worker. Service provider makes me giggle, it feels so pink collar!
I had a client call me a dirty slut once, that didn't really sit too well with me, I'm really clean :)
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I don't find the word prozzy offensive as it is what I am doing. I am a proud prozzy, who enjoy others paying for exchange sexual services many do. The odd few only massage. I can call myself it with clients and still feel great about myself. It is what one associates the prozzy with. It is what we are doing seriously. Escorting is a politer word for prozzy but is still the same. Doing some thing society associates prozzys with then dislike getting called one.
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As usual came late to this and did wonder if OP was a punter?..... Anyway. I don't like the word prostitute because of the sound it makes. It's got 3 syllables and sounds a bit clipped and cold to me. Proxie on the other hand sounds quite nice but I prefer the term Whore for myself, it's got a pleasing sound to me and having looked at definitions of the word am quite happy that it describes my behaviour and general ethos to a tee :-)
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I enjoy the word whore. Once got scolded by a client for calling myself it. Don't really care what I'm called. As long as I'm treated with respect. And paid. Being paid is nice.
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I don't mind what people call me. I have no qualms with the word prostitute. In fact I find it good with guys who are pushing boundaries to use that word for some reason it stops them in their tracks haba
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I don't mind what people call me. I have no qualms with the word prostitute. In fact I find it good with guys who are pushing boundaries to use that word for some reason it stops them in their tracks haba
How exactly do you use it to stop them in their tracks? Might be useful to know!
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I honestly think I'd lay an egg if a punter called me a prostitute but if a fellow WG did, I really wouldn't take any offence at all. Ever so strange. Maybe something to do with the context and the way it's directed perhaps
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I enjoy the word whore. Once got scolded by a client for calling myself it. Don't really care what I'm called. As long as I'm treated with respect. And paid. Being paid is nice.
Ha! Yes agree re. The money it's really nice isn't it? Gives me a really warm fuzzy feeling these days. I've been scolded for calling myself a whore too by a client.
The absolute best bit now is when they say 'we'll deal with the paperwork first of course'. Makes me want to skip. I used to find this a bit of a twee phrase but after writing report after bloody report for the day job (No I am not a teacher!!!!!) I love the 'paperwork' we have to deal with - reminds me that although in theory I earn a similar amount from my day job per hour that doesn't account for the bloody tedious paperwork, travel or stress, nor does it allow me quite so much fun when all is going well - although when it doesn't it's the pits.
But best of all I love being paid for going on 'dates' after my chequered past with the dreaded on line dating sites but anyway must stay on point rather than digressing into my favourite gripe so....yes I proudly claim the term Whore, - more Whore for me! It fits me very nicely and prossie comes an acceptable second, although if a nice, clean smelling, respectful punter with money came looking for a prostitute, hey honey, I'm your Girly, Babes, Hun! (Well perhaps not Hun and Hunny doesn't make it better either it just compounds the offence).
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im not aa prostitue as i dont have any sex om a sub and on do hjs. so i do not like being called one xx
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im not aa prostitue as i dont have any sex om a sub and on do hjs. so i do not like being called one xx
Rosaley, anybody who offers a sexual service to in-person paying customers is a prostitute, whether it's BDSM of some type, massage with HR or plain old shagging and blow jobs. A sexual service basically encompasses anything that would be viewed as being intended for somebody to get their rocks off.
This most certainly includes both pro subs and dommes - actual penetrative sex is nothing to do with the legal definition, and whilst if you don't like it you don't like it and it's not important here, it's important you know this should you ever decide to take on a flat share (say) with another person who's working, because it's no less a brothel.
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Ive been called just once fucking whore by a drunk young client, after I refused to service him because he didnt wash proper after 2 showers.
I didnt mind at all, in fact I was amused how a filthy young guy sees me as a whore just because he had a cheesy knob and didnt know how to wash proper at his age.
I use the word prostitute sometimes talking with the clients about myself and I have no problem with that. I tell them I love to be one as I love the freedom, the sex and the money I get for enjoying myself. What they want to call me / us is their bussines, after all they are paying their hard earned cash to a prostitute to get sex or sexual services in return, and I am one and I dont mind to be called that.
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I don't mind what people call me. I have no qualms with the word prostitute. In fact I find it good with guys who are pushing boundaries to use that word for some reason it stops them in their tracks haba
How exactly do you use it to stop them in their tracks? Might be useful to know!
It's more the guys that try to go soft on you takeing the GFE too far wanting to know my real name or the "I thought you had a good time with me" just the sentence "I'm a prostitute." just clarifies to them the relationship we have is professional.
When a guy asks for bareback (only happened once in an appointment he asked if he could "quickly dip it in") I say "You really want to do bareback with a prostitute?" It just adds that dose of reality they clearly need at that point.
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Nope, the word has never offended me as its what we all are regardless of wether we see ourselves that way. I know some women find the word too raw and close to the mark but I dont see how closer to the mark you can get when you have a guys dick in your mouth and his money stashed in your purse. I dont mind the term prossie either, I do get offended when people spell it like this though "pro$$ie" as it implies that the only thing we care about in life is money and that we are greedy and money grabbing when in fact all we are doing is charging for a service and no one spells "plumber$" or "hair $styli$t" do they. OF COURSE we do it for the money, it wouldnt be a job if we didnt, it would be a bloody volunteer service
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I don't mind what people call me. I have no qualms with the word prostitute. In fact I find it good with guys who are pushing boundaries to use that word for some reason it stops them in their tracks haba
How exactly do you use it to stop them in their tracks? Might be useful to know!
It's more the guys that try to go soft on you takeing the GFE too far wanting to know my real name or the "I thought you had a good time with me" just the sentence "I'm a prostitute." just clarifies to them the relationship we have is professional.
When a guy asks for bareback (only happened once in an appointment he asked if he could "quickly dip it in") I say "You really want to do bareback with a prostitute?" It just adds that dose of reality they clearly need at that point.
I agree here, despite the massive amounts of research some guys do and the value for money they demand they still dont like to see themselves as the sort of person who would visit a prostitute so you become the "lady they see" or "the working girl" or "escort" which is all fine with me but if they are pushing it and expecting time for free etc then reminding them that "prostitutes" charge does kind of bring them up short and make them stop in their tracks. Sometimes they stammer a bit too when explaining that they dont see you THAT way as if its an insult?not an insult to me x
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Yeah it actually makes me cringe when they say 'I don't think of you that way'.Why not I am a prossie and proud of it. Its like any word can be awful if it is said in the wrong way.But truth is men pay to fuck me...ergo I am a prostitute.
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I don't like the word 'prostitute' at all to be honest, i do use the term to describe myself on rare occasions but it'd irritate me somewhat if a client began saying something like "ooh that's it you dirty little prostitute" - i'd be very annoyed. Silly really because that's exactly what i am!
I'd prefer to be referred to as a "whore" which amounts to the same thing anyway, i actually quite like being called a whore..
But prostitute? However contradictory and silly i may sound to some - i just don't like being called one either ;D
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My boyfriend laughs at me when I say "oh, it's my whorephone... I've got whoremail..." :') I very much consider myself a whore! ;D
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Happy to be a whore, prostitute etc as the rest are saying, it comes with positives not negatives for me :)
I mean i see where it sounds negative as most the time it's used as hateful slur, but at the end of the day that is what we do. I always find it funny when time wasters call me whore, i'm like thanks for stating the obvious...
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My boyfriend laughs at me when I say "oh, it's my whorephone... I've got whoremail..." :') I very much consider myself a whore! ;D
I call it the whorephone too it makes me feel like a super hero like batman has the bat phone :)
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My boyfriend laughs at me when I say "oh, it's my whorephone... I've got whoremail..." :') I very much consider myself a whore! ;D
I call it the whorephone too it makes me feel like a super hero like batman has the bat phone :)
I also like whoremail, as when typing hotmail.co.uk it is easily mis-typed as hormail.co.uk (one letter away, adjacent on the keyboard) so gives me chuckles all the time :')
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We ARE prostitutes. I am not shamed of it.
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Out of all fairness it would be like a banker denying being a banker. It makes no sense at all other than indenial. If that word 'indenial' is looked up for the definition. If one doesn't like to be branded then surly wouldn't be doing. This is my opinion. It is just a word being a prozzie to me but know made that choice living that life style. So am prepared being stereo typed by the public. It doesn't upset me I just feel sorry for those trying to bring me down with their talking down to me like a prozzy. At the end of the day just they need to pay to get laid where I don't. This usually makes them quiet.
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Yes I am happy with the word prostitute and accept that is what I am when selling sex for money. Unfortunately, many people do not accept that the word is not suited to those that are sex workers like webcammers, lap dancers etc... I also heard a woman on a radio chat show saying that she thought it was disgusting that sex shops (places that people can go to have sex) were allowed to be licensed.
Sarah x x x
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i hate the word prossie :FF
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i hate the word prossie :FF
I don't mind it at all.
Slag is probably my current least fave word for a working or civvy lady who enjoys sex. Sounds like a dirty nasty thing.
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That's what we are though x
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i hate the word prossie :FF
I don't mind it at all.
Slag is probably my current least fave word for a working or civvy lady who enjoys sex. Sounds like a dirty nasty thing.
I agree, x
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i hate the word prossie :FF
I don't mind it at all.
Slag is probably my current least fave word for a working or civvy lady who enjoys sex. Sounds like a dirty nasty thing.
I agree, x
Just to add an afterthought to my post, "slag" can't be dressed up as anything positive, it's always derogatory. Slut, whore, tart <<< all can be sexy and positive and norty, but "slag" just sounds like an insult however it's said in whatever context.
Anyway, back to the topic: "prossie" is just a contraction of "prostitute" and I don't mind it at all as that is what I am.
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Whenever I hear the word, "Prostitute," I just hear the South Park song by Chef. Look it up on YouTube if you don't know what I'm talking about!
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Whenever I hear the word, "Prostitute," I just hear the South Park song by Chef. Look it up on YouTube if you don't know what I'm talking about!
Will do! :D
(I LOVED the song "Chocolate Salty Balls" at the time)
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I love the "Chocolate Salty Balls" song too.
Especially as the recipe (which makes up the verses) has no salt in it!!! ;D
xxx
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I am a prostitute it is the term for my profession although I prefer to call myself a Working Girl or a Sex Worker, I will not sugarcoat it by using the term Escort because we are not just escorting someone we are also providing a personal service.
As for chocolate salty balls I guess that is my kink but fresh sweaty balls ;D :P
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Am not bothered by being referred to as a prostitute, that's what I am ..
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It doesn't really matter what word we use to describe what we do. Prostitute/prossie, whore, working girl, harlot, lady of the night, escort, courtesan, hooker, call girl, ho. We have sex for money they all mean the same thing. I for one embrace them all. It is who we are and what we do.
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That consoncious decision was made as soon as one began accepting cash for a horny time. The term slag whore prostute goes over my head like a breath of fresh air. Doing a prozzying thing associated with. as soon as the clients leave am back to doing my own thing but accept all the stigmas attached to prozzying.the thing is even if didn't accept the stigma things would still be. So becoming angry all the time because of the stigma isnt going to improve. If anything become worse. Making peace like this enables things to run smoothly for me.
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whore, prostitute, trollop... its all fine, but i really REALLY hate the word slag. i agree with the poster who said there no good connotation from it at all.
i do love trollop though
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whore, prostitute, trollop... its all fine, but i really REALLY hate the word slag. i agree with the poster who said there no good connotation from it at all.
i do love trollop though
ahhh, trollop's a great word, sounds delicious :D
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It doesn't really matter what word we use to describe what we do. Prostitute/prossie, whore, working girl, harlot, lady of the night, escort, courtesan, hooker, call girl, ho. We have sex for money they all mean the same thing. I for one embrace them all. It is who we are and what we do.
Ditto! I'm proud of the service I offer and how I market myself(courtesan) which is all PR anyway, I am a prostitute.
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I wouldn't say I'm proud to be a prostitute, I'm not ashamed either but I think you can only really be proud of an achievement and I don't see prossying as that
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I wouldn't say I'm proud to be a prostitute, I'm not ashamed either but I think you can only really be proud of an achievement and I don't see prossying as that
same here! I'd be proud if I'd studied and worked hard in a career! I'm not disgusted with myself but not proud of myself, I'm proud I've brought my daughter up alone and am financing her nursing degree, not proud I've slept with countless men to do so! X
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Doesn't offend me in the slightest. I am what I am, and I'm a prostitute.
I don't think it's even a derogatory term, and I also think there's a difference between a prostitute and an escort,
but at the end of the day, they're all just words...
Some words make more money than others lol ;)
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I wouldn't say I'm proud to be a prostitute, I'm not ashamed either but I think you can only really be proud of an achievement and I don't see prossying as that
same here! I'd be proud if I'd studied and worked hard in a career! I'm not disgusted with myself but not proud of myself, I'm proud I've brought my daughter up alone and am financing her nursing degree, not proud I've slept with countless men to do so! X
Yes same for me, I'm proud of my academic achievements, and glad for the sex industry that's given me the opportunity to pursue them.
Making men shoot their load isn't my idea of achievement!
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I wouldn't say I'm proud to be a prostitute, I'm not ashamed either but I think you can only really be proud of an achievement and I don't see prossying as that
same here! I'd be proud if I'd studied and worked hard in a career! I'm not disgusted with myself but not proud of myself, I'm proud I've brought my daughter up alone and am financing her nursing degree, not proud I've slept with countless men to do so! X
Yes same for me, I'm proud of my academic achievements, and glad for the sex industry that's given me the opportunity to pursue them.
Making men shoot their load isn't my idea of achievement!
I think you're being a bit hard on yourselves, folks - you'll have made plenty of said mens days along the way! Think of the people who've finally got to try out things they'd always wanted to thanks to you or who would probably never get any intimate or sexual contact without you, maybe even any physical contact at all (or just a chance to look at real boobs and fannies :D).
There aren't many jobs which exist to make somebody else's day a bit more pleasant and plenty that do the opposite, and you have the first one :).
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I wouldn't say I'm proud to be a prostitute, I'm not ashamed either but I think you can only really be proud of an achievement and I don't see prossying as that
same here! I'd be proud if I'd studied and worked hard in a career! I'm not disgusted with myself but not proud of myself, I'm proud I've brought my daughter up alone and am financing her nursing degree, not proud I've slept with countless men to do so! X
Yes same for me, I'm proud of my academic achievements, and glad for the sex industry that's given me the opportunity to pursue them.
Making men shoot their load isn't my idea of achievement!
I think you're being a bit hard on yourselves, folks - you'll have made plenty of said mens days along the way! Think of the people who've finally got to try out things they'd always wanted to thanks to you or who would probably never get any intimate or sexual contact without you, maybe even any physical contact at all (or just a chance to look at real boobs and fannies :D).
There aren't many jobs which exist to make somebody else's day a bit more pleasant and plenty that do the opposite, and you have the first one :).
I agree. I am bloody proud of being able to pay my rent and put food on my table (and sometimes the table of my children, who - as most of us mums know - never really leave home ever) and clothe myself and pay my taxes and all the rest of the stuff that comes with holding down a job. We're self-employed, and freelance/running a biz isn't always easy, keeping your head above water can be stressful.
I may not hold that degree or be in a job that people look up to, but whoring is no better or worse in the pride stakes than toilet cleaning, shelf stacking, till scanning, cold calling, child minding, proof reading, car boot selling, all of which are jobs that I have done (while my children were little/growing up) and am proud to have done to feed my kids and put shoes on their feet and send them to school and tuck them in bed under the roof that *I* paid for. I'm like Amy - I pre-date the minimum wage, and have done some not very pleasant jobs for 50p an hour. Still proud of doing them though :)
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It doesn't offend me. I'd rather be a prostitute than a slut or a whore. Escort is kind of misleading & idl plauong pretend
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I'd be offended if somebody outside of the sex industry called me a prostitute purely because it has a lot of negative connotations. Some antis also use the phrase 'prostituting your body' which I hate as that's not what I do. I don't rent out my body for sex which is what some people think prostitution is - I have the right to decline services, choose who I see and work when and where I like. Yes, I know technically that is still prostitution but some people have this idea that prostitutes don't have the right to say no when they're working. I don't mind calling myself a whore, prostitute, hooker etc. but as those words are commonly thrown around as insults in the UK I won't put up with anyone outside the industry calling me them.
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Iv got older teenage boys, recently they watched watched a british gangter move where they all tend to spend a lot of time calling each other "you slaaaaaag" in a cockney accent and gravelly voice. Consequently the boys are now greeting each other each day with "hi YOU SLAAAAAAG" as they think its hilarious. I think ill have it lodged in the back of my brain so that if any punter or person does turn around and call me a name referring to my job I shall just "oh shut up YOU SLAAAAAAAG" them. I shall never be able to take that word seriously again ;D
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I sometimes make a point of using the word "prostitute" when defining boundaries with a client who seems to have gotten a bit confused. As in, "Oh, no, I don't think going for lunch sometime would be a very good idea. Most prostitutes tend to prefer to keep work and business separate."
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Prostitute doesn't bother me either, I tend to address myself as an escort to clients etc, and when I'm with my sister or someone I'm close with who knows about my job, then I use the term hooker in a light hearted comedy way, for eg. I shall soon be coming out of my hooker closet to my mum. Or something like that.
I've noticed a lot of women on here don't like hun, darling, my dear, sweetie etc. They don't bother me at all, maybe it's because of where I'm from. Here in Somerset these terms are commonly used, in shops, between friends, in the pubs, the list goes on. When I've worked in local pubs, it's just force of habbit to go, "you alright hun, what may I get you?". I don't batter an eyelid at it. The one thing I don't like is being called babe by someone I've never met before, that rufflesmy feathers, but only a bit, then I just let go of it. These clients aren't doing it out of disrespect, it's most likely because where they come from, it's common lingo and just a force of habbit, it just comes out without a thought. xox
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I think of "prostitute" as the technical term for what we are and do. While it's still a loaded term - if you call the school head teacher a prostitute she'll be just as offended as if you'd called her a whore - it's the one that newspapers will use. "Escort" is a euphemism, which I think is OK and I understand why people use it. It's probably the friendliest term to use, except maybe "working girl." But I don't object to being called a "prostitute."
I have had people call me my nationality in a sneering tone of voice. I mean, you can say ANYTHING in a nasty tone of voice and make it an insult. "Oh, well! Aren't you the head teacher!!!"
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Yeah, I take no issue with the word. I do take issue with how it is used at times, but when someone is that disrespectful it doesnt matter which words they choose, they are an arse no matter what.
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I'm calling myself prostitute. I prefer this than "working girl" which for me is just very nice euphemism. I'm not ashamed of this work. Until you start doing this you won't have idea how hard it can be, so when I think about time when I was working in retail I don't feel bad about myself.
It's just a word - we are giving it actual meaning. For me prostitute must be smart, detail oriented and well organised lady who runs her own business. It's something to be proud about.
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I like the term 'sex worker' myself. If I watch a news report on, for example, Peter Sutcliffe or Steve Wright, I feel uncomfortable when the victims are referred to as 'Prostitutes' as opposed to sex workers. It feels 'different' when you hear it said on Civvy street somehow.
I find that Clients really dislike the word also. :-\
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'Working girl' or 'Sex worker' would be less sensational and more respectful. After all, we're just doing a job like everyone else. I do think the word is used in the media intentionally to put us in a negative light. If a shop worker gets murdered etc they don't put 'SHOP WORKER KILLED' on the front page.
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I prefer 'sex worker' Most clients seem to prefer 'escort'. I'm not offended by much though and frequently refer to myself with my friends as a 'Ho' or 'Whoooere' (insert northern accent) not through lack of respect for myself but in much the same way that homosexuals and ethnic minorities might take an offensive term and turn it round to use for themselves. Language is just that - language. I'm mainly offended when I detect that offence or lack of respect is intended but then we are all different xxxx :)
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I sometimes make a point of using the word "prostitute" when defining boundaries with a client who seems to have gotten a bit confused. As in, "Oh, no, I don't think going for lunch sometime would be a very good idea. Most prostitutes tend to prefer to keep work and business separate."
I say this to lol
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I find that Clients really dislike the word also. :-\
Some do, but some men are excited by it and I use it a lot for that reason.
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Id prefer any version of sex worker than traffic warden !
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Hi,
I work with some other girls and the other day made a joke about prostitutes. They got all funny saying we are not prostitutes. Well we are by definition.
Just wondered if anyone else feels this way and does not like being called a prostitute.
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I dont find it offensive in the slightest.
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Not bothered at all.I sell my fanny for a living ergo I'm a prostitute.I prefer sex worker overall but no I don't find prossie or prostitute offensive.
I don't really like the word whore but that's because I find when people use that term they spit it out as a term of offense.
I think some women get upset about it because they associate the word prostitute with street workers,they don't get that just because you may call yourself an escort and you charge more it's still the same thing at the end of the day! ::)
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If you do admin and type letters in an office you are a secretary. If you work in a store you are a sales assistant. If you sell or rent out your body for cash you are a prostitute. I know what I am but agree there are some people even in this job who hate the word.
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It is like builders are builders and sex workers are labled prostitutes. It doesn't bother me as am for real. Now if I gave this up and was called it would bother me.
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Since it's been done before I've merged it, even though the existing thread is quite old :).
As I've said further up, I'm baffled at the idea anybody who is a prostitute would object to being called a prostitute. I can understand objecting to somebody's tone or intention if they were deliberately being rude or derogatory, but that's nothing to do with the word and everything to do with the context.
I hate 'escort' but probably because I associate it with deluded punters who don't like thinking of themselves as punters. And twee, 'fun' euphemisms like 'floozy' and 'harlot' give me the fucking rage :D.
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Not bothered at all.I sell my fanny for a living ergo I'm a prostitute.I prefer sex worker overall but no I don't find prossie or prostitute offensive.
I don't really like the word whore but that's because I find when people use that term they spit it out as a term of offense.
I think some women get upset about it because they associate the word prostitute with street workers,they don't get that just because you may call yourself an escort and you charge more it's still the same thing at the end of the day! ::)
I like your style. :)
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Some people are just deluded sensitive little flowers, like the sugar baby types.
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I prefer "whore" as it's so flexible. It can be a noun ("I'm a whore") or a verb ("Can't go to Aunty Ethel's party on Sunday, I'm out whoring.")
It also allows me to talk about having a "whoredrobe" of lingerie and skimpy dresses :D
I don't mind "prostitute" but it feels like a really technical term to me, I suppose because it's derived from "Prostitution" which is a legal term.
I think for some sex workers, if they are carrying shame (consciously or otherwise) about what they do, they are more likely to be uncomfortable with terms which have historically been pejorative.
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I prefer "whore" as it's so flexible. It can be a noun ("I'm a whore") or a verb ("Can't go to Aunty Ethel's party on Sunday, I'm out whoring.")
It also allows me to talk about having a "whoredrobe" of lingerie and skimpy dresses :D
I don't mind "prostitute" but it feels like a really technical term to me, I suppose because it's derived from "Prostitution" which is a legal term.
I think for some sex workers, if they are carrying shame (consciously or otherwise) about what they do, they are more likely to be uncomfortable with terms which have historically been pejorative.
Ha ha, I love 'whoredrobe'!!
Whore is an excellent word. There's a really good Twitter account called Whores of Yore which posts old photos of historical sex workers and vintage porn. The woman who runs it describes the word 'whore' as something which means a strong woman in control of her sexuality. It's a bit like reclaiming a word which has always been meant to insult us.
I personally don't like 'prostitute' because like VC says it sounds a bit clinical. Prossy, on the ther hand is OK! :)
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I think for some sex workers, if they are carrying shame (consciously or otherwise) about what they do, they are more likely to be uncomfortable with terms which have historically been pejorative.
Agree. I mentioned whoring in front of another girl, she burst into tears. I felt awful. Turned out her dad had been pimping her :(
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...It also allows me to talk about having a "whoredrobe" of lingerie and skimpy dresses...
"Whoredrobe" ya ha ha!!
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I feel the same as all the ladies who have mentioned disliking being called 'babe, hun, etc', and it often highlights an enquiry from a timewaster in my experience.
I do not mind at all being called a prostitute as the definition of 'prostitute' is someone who engages in sexual activity for payment. That is what we do, so there's no denying the term.
I don't allow myself to be 'offended' by any word. That would just be allowing other people control over the thoughts in my mind.
And I actually like the word 'whore' as it sounds deep, sexy and a little more daring. ;D
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I am terrible for using the word hun or hen lol, think it's just the area I grew up in.
Personally none of the words used offend me. Now if someone used a certain 4 letter word starting with S ending in G then I would be pissed.
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As men come to see me and get their wallets lightened in exchange for sexual services, that means I am a prostitute. Whatever terminology is used, the job of lightening their wallets and balls is still the same. Haha
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I have no issue with it. It is what it is!
The only time I have a problem with it is if people try to use it as an insult or as a derogatory term. But then again, I think a lot of the time those people just don't understand it.
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I wonder how they feel about the term 'Punter' a seeker of Prostitutes ..... one rule huh lol ;)
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...the job of lightening their wallets and balls is still the same. Haha
Ya ha ha!!
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If you get offended by the word "prostitute" then you shouldnt be doing this job! xxxx
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I am providing sex for money like we all are and sex worker or escorts are posh names for prositutes but still the same thing.The prozzy word goes over my head especially when clients try and offend me. I find it so amuzing.
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I don't mind being called a prostitute. I'm not confident in myself to feel good about being called a whore. I have been called a "Lady Whore". I don't think of myself as being innocence on top and dirty in bed so a little shy of this. Being called a "slut" is off limits and will get a client blocked or thrown out as will "fucktoy". I hate being called "hun".
I have sold my body for sex. I don't know whether to be amazed or baffled. ;D
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Met people who get upset by the term but don't really no why, "escort" is just another way to say the same thing it doesn't really mean anything different, when people read that they know it means you're a prostitute and you sell sex so why it upsets them who knows. I've referred to myself as both an escort and prostitute interchangeably and occasionally used hooker which I guess is more of an American word. It's just a job description nothing more than that.
Do strippers get offended by being called strippers?
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I honestly don't care myself - I'm too old, got far more pressing issues like planning for touring. But I don't call you or anyone a prostitute in case it offends!
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I honestly don't care myself - I'm too old, got far more pressing issues like planning for touring. But I don't call you or anyone a prostitute in case it offends!
I'm the same. It's not the word prostitute escort or hooker but how you use it.
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The only reason I can think why they get offended is maybe they think of streetwise as such and just being snobby.
A bit like people who like to dress up their job title e.g toilet attendant as a sanitation administrator.
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The word "Prostitute" carries a negative connotation, I don't like the vibe around it... and i find it quite "reductive"...
I don't know... this is my feeling.
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The word "Prostitute" carries a negative connotation, I don't like the vibe around it... and i find it quite "reductive"...
I don't know... this is my feeling.
I agree, I find it an exposing word & it means just that interestingly, from Latin prostitut- ?exposed publicly, offered for sale?, from the verb prostituere.
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At an outcall Friday night I could tell the client was struggling how to phrase me like prostitute but stopped short and said escort. I told him I am a prostitute and am aware with what I am doing in flirtatious way smiling.
To me I think if a banker doesn't want to be called a banker but still wants to be a banker. It doesn't make sense to me where is the logic in that?.
We are in our actions we are not when actionless.
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Amongst us, I don't mind the term because it is what it is :-*
The word "Prostitute" carries a negative connotation, I don't like the vibe around it... and i find it quite "reductive"...
I don't know... this is my feeling.
^^^^^^^^ I agree ^^^^^^^^
Call me petty, or a snowflake, or whatever but in general I prefer the terms escort / call girl / sex worker as I feel they takes away the stigma. Being a prostitute has always been portrayed like it's the worst thing you could ever do. Prostitution is a crime in many countries and when many people use the term, they do it with the intention of 'hurting' you. They say it with contempt, and use it as a slur. They want to make you feel as if you're a criminal and are somebody who is beneath them. There is a lot of social stigma around the term. Just because one person doesn't like it doesn't make them a snowflake. Everybody is different.
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The word "Prostitute" carries a negative connotation, I don't like the vibe around it... and i find it quite "reductive"...
I don't know... this is my feeling.
Like exactly this. I'd actually prefer to be called a whore, prostitute just has too many connotations with poverty/disease/drug addiction because of how the media have portrayed the word but call girl/escort (for whatever reason) are portrayed like they're higher class
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Like exactly this. I'd actually prefer to be called a whore, prostitute just has too many connotations with poverty/disease/drug addiction because of how the media have portrayed the word but call girl/escort (for whatever reason) are portrayed like they're higher class
We are defined by society with what we do. I should try calling the bank manager a toilet cleaner to see how he takes it probably with not well.
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I agree, I find it an exposing word & it means just that interestingly, from Latin prostitut- ?exposed publicly, offered for sale?, from the verb prostituere.
I agree I don't like it at all, makes me think of girls walking the streets, none of my clients would ever refer to me as such. For me I am a 'Sex Therapist' and honestly from all the men I see I think that is the best term to describe what I do .... it is not all about the physical act.
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If you have sex for cash, you're a prostitute. Makes no difference whether it's on a street corner or in a five-star hotel. It's just a word.
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Better than the word whore, not that I mind that either, or rather I am a hoor.
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Better than the word whore
I agree, but mostly because whore has been commandeered by tedious shouty folk who spend a lot of time making up stupid portmanteau words with it and using it to describe themselves at every possible opportunity on Twitter and suchlike, because They're Soooo Edgy! Aren't You Shocked? Pleeeeease Be A Bit Shocked!
Oh, do fuck off.
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I'm not a huge fan of it but it's factual. I think of myself as more a professional bill payer cause I spend more time doing that than anything else ;D I pride myself on being self sufficient, I provide for my family, we live very well and I contribute towards my country. For that alone, I reckon I could cope with any label that's put on it.
As someone else has stated though, if my children ever heard me and prostitute in the same sentence I think I would die on the spot.
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The word "Prostitute" carries a negative connotation, I don't like the vibe around it... and i find it quite "reductive"...
I don't know... this is my feeling.
Totally agree
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It's a word to describe what we are, along with all the other words. They all refer to someone who sells sexual favours for money. It doesn't bother me in the slightest. It's who we are. One word that bugs me a little is, escort. What the hell is that all about, trying to make it sound something it isn't. Although courtesan is frowned upon it is slightly more honest than escort.
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It's a word to describe what we are, along with all the other words. They all refer to someone who sells sexual favours for money. It doesn't bother me in the slightest. It's who we are. One word that bugs me a little is, escort. What the hell is that all about, trying to make it sound something it isn't. Although courtesan is frowned upon it is slightly more honest than escort.
I don't like the word escort much either although I use it in my advertising.
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It's a word to describe what we are, along with all the other words. They all refer to someone who sells sexual favours for money. It doesn't bother me in the slightest. It's who we are. One word that bugs me a little is, escort. What the hell is that all about, trying to make it sound something it isn't. Although courtesan is frowned upon it is slightly more honest than escort.
I don't like the word escort much either although I use it in my advertising.
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How about ...
LADY OF THE NIGHT!
That's a joke.
I always preferred 'Call girl' as a more modern, cleaner and prescriptive term even though I don't use it. Or could it even be 'text girl' nowadays?
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I too like the term call girl. "Escort" is not what we do unless escorting from the front door to the bedroom is meant but of course it isn't. The fact is though that "escort" is the one word used mostly I believe when men are searching, if we have it in our tags and search words and on our websites etc then we are found easily.
Googling callgirl is not going to throw up much for punters but escort is! So escorts we will stay whether we like it or not.
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How about ...
LADY OF THE NIGHT!
I'd have to be a Lady Of The Mid Morning To Sometime In The Afternoon When I Get Bored And Go Home :D. I can barely stay awake through Family Guy nowadays.
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The term prostitute doesn't bother me at all, as I am selling sex that's what I am.
I've noticed though wasters or abusive idiots who texts or call you usually use the term "prostitute" in order to insult you or degrade you which makes me giggle.
I just say 10/10 for observation mate!
Everyone has their preference some may not mind prostitute, some escort, hooker, working girl etc etc.
Sheila I like Lady of the Night! Hahah.
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I don't at all. If it offends them I suppose your in the wrong industry. I'm comfortable with the word whore too. The one word I don't like is courtesan. Whether your walking the streets or in a penthouse in Dubai, a brass is a brass, and rich men see allsorts x
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I think prostitute is like any other negative if you embrace it it takes away the negative connotations....Yes I'm a prossie and proud!!!
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I don't at all. If it offends them I suppose your in the wrong industry. I'm comfortable with the word whore too. The one word I don't like is courtesan. Whether your walking the streets or in a penthouse in Dubai, a brass is a brass, and rich men see allsorts x
Now if I had to choose a word we are sometimes called which I don't like, it is brass.
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The public use this term to try and put us down and denigrate what we do...I have never considered myself to be a prostitute, my job would have been significantly easier if I had been ::)
I have always attracted the difficult cases and spent a lot of time being an acting psychologist, lover, friend all rolled into one...I did not expect this and have had to consult with a psychiatrist many times over the years, it can be a huge responsibility.
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The term prostitute doesn't bother me at all, as I am selling sex that's what I am.
I've noticed though wasters or abusive idiots who texts or call you usually use the term "prostitute" in order to insult you or degrade you which makes me giggle.
I just say 10/10 for observation mate!
Everyone has their preference some may not mind prostitute, some escort, hooker, working girl etc etc.
Sheila I like Lady of the Night! Hahah.
I used to have a problem with it, until I realised I was letting what a bunch of people invested in making us feel bad for their own ends (ie. media, government, big business, assorted individuals) dictate what I thought. Historically it's been peddled as a dirty word, with dirty associations, take that away, and all it does is describe what we do.
I still won't say its my favourite, probably working girl. But I also love Lady of the Night!
Terms like escort are just sanitised media friendly terms that enable us to advertise.
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New and old terminology for the word prostitute. Service provider. Adult worker. Masseur. Sauna assistant. Escort. Kept woman. Mistress. Courtesan. Mistress. Harlot. Call girl. Working girl. Hooker. (please feel free to add your own).
I like service provider best of all :) It depends what company i'm in, as to how I describe my job. It is after all just a profession, eg hair dresser, beautician, nail technician, nurse etc :)
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I now prefer being called an escort.
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I often don't mind as a generic term, but I do resent the degree of hypocrisy when journalists and "society/government" generally use the term. They underestimate how hard this work is and the benefit, which this work brings to the society.
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I often don't mind as a generic term, but I do resent the degree of hypocrisy when journalists and "society/government" generally use the term. They underestimate how hard this work is and the benefit, which this work brings to the society.
Agree
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Someone in my civvy little band who know I do this was having a discussion about it with me. They mentioned words like escort and hooker etc and then came out with the choice words "but you know it all just means prostitute" :FF
My god until they said that I had no idea! ::)
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Doesn't bother me
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I think we have to look at it differently, whether you're a hooker/prostitute/sex worker or plumber, office/factory worker or a van driver, every person in a profession is selling at part of their body and their skills for money. Some do low risk jobs such as being a call centre person and others do high risk jobs such as emergency services, armed forces, or prostitution. Either way we are all selling a part of ourselves in order to make money. Difference is that what we do will always be in high demand and it'll always pay better than average money when compared to other jobs out there, mostly.
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Er, I'm not selling any part of myself or my body? I'm selling a service and there's no ownership change involved.
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Er, I'm not selling any part of myself or my body? I'm selling a service and there's no ownership change involved.
Ok, maybe I worded it wrong. But my point it that we use our body as a tool to make money, to provide a service, without that tool we wouldn't be able to do what we do and as a service provider we wouldn't be able to provide. You're right, we're not owned by anyone, to act in that way would suggest we're slaves, we're not.
I think cutting right to it, my point here is that there are those outside of the profession who see sex work as a low life occupation, but the truth is we all sell a part of ourselves in order to make money. Providing a service for money isn't limited to the sex industry, it's everywhere.
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I don't use the word , realise that's what I am but I dislike it as said before use to negative connotations but then again I don't like the word Punter either and don't use that either.
I'm not under any allusions at all just prefer escort and client .
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A rose by any other name, would smell as sweet :) "Shakespeare's Romeo and Juliet" For a short period of time, (half an hour or an hour) we are lovers. They love us, we love their money :) :) :)
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I guess in life there is no harm jazzing things up a little especially in this business as long as it's Based on some truth and it's not misleading. It's like the whole high class escort thing. It's all just an illusion in my eyes. I like thinking that my job is a chance to be whoever I want to be, even if it's just myself! Prostitute & punter, Escort & client. It's all the same however you put it so it makes no real difference as long as you're doing what makes you happy it's best to accept that everyone has a preference.
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Sorry for the terrible pun, I honestly couldn't help myself
What terms or words do you use for what you do? I've noticed on these boards everyone has their own way of saying things, I use different terms in different contexts
Hooker : What I call myself in my head, I guess it's American influence, kind of derogatory but i prefer it to whore
Escort: What I call myself to clients so they feel classier, my 'professional' title, although I don't really feel like the term fits me
Pute (french for whore): Sex workers in France have done an amazing job of semantic reclamation on this one. I kind of feel like we own this word now. Sometimes a client gets nasty over mail/text and says 'pute!' as an insult, "I'm like yeah and what pal?"
Sex Worker: What I call myself when with my civvy friends who are in the know, and with colleagues, it's also more of term I use when thinking of us in a political sense
Prossie: lol never liked this before but Amy I've noticed you use it a lot and now it's kind of the same as hooker in my head ;)
Prostitute: Seems like the most neutral term, but kind of clinical, apparently it derives from something like "those who put themselves forward on the street" in latin, and was used to describe us as a public nuisance. I've noticed it's more often used by abolitionists, NGOs, etc (with the exception of the English Collective of Prostitutes)
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Sadly the title is gone, but since we already have a 13 page page thread on the subject that many of the people here have already answered hopefully that will make up for it :).
I use prossie because I always have - it's a contraction of 'prostitute' and I've heard it since I was at school. I don't like Americanisms and don't use them, so if I want something less 'formal' than prostitute it's perfect and I think it's friendlier sounding. I detest 'escort' and the fact I have to use it on my website for the search engines pains me every day.
I don't find 'whore' derogatory in itself, but it does seem to be used a lot in a desperately try-hard way by people I don't really want to be likened to, so I avoid that as well. Prossie is fine for me :D.
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I am a prostitute end of.
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I use hooker or whorebag to fellow women in the trade who I know are cool with that kind of gallows humour reclamation stuff.
I'm not offended by prostitute at all (it does what is says on the tin) but don't use it often... more because it feels unwieldy than anything.
I'll use sex worker occasionally in a polite context but not over keen on it, its a bit clinical/ administrative sounding plus it doesn't really specifically mean prostitute as I understand it but anyone in the sex trade and I've seen women who just sell content like tit pics online use it . Its like 'I work in the catering industry' as opposed to saying 'cook' or 'waitress' to me.
Escort for advertising.
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I'll use sex worker occasionally in a polite context but not over keen on it, its a bit clinical/ administrative sounding plus it doesn't really specifically mean prostitute as I understand it but anyone in the sex trade and I've seen women who just sell content like tit pics online use it . Its like 'I work in the catering industry' as opposed to saying 'cook' or 'waitress' to me.
I think 'sex worker' is useful as an umbrella term exactly for this reason - I'm a sex worker who works as a prostitute, and other sex workers work as webcammers, porn performers, phone chat operators, fetish models, strippers, sensual masseuses and so on. It's not intended to be specific :).
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Sadly the title is gone, but since we already have a 13 page page thread on the subject that many of the people here have already answered hopefully that will make up for it :).
I use prossie because I always have - it's a contraction of 'prostitute' and I've heard it since I was at school. I don't like Americanisms and don't use them, so if I want something less 'formal' than prostitute it's perfect and I think it's friendlier sounding. I detest 'escort' and the fact I have to use it on my website for the search engines pains me every day.
I don't find 'whore' derogatory in itself, but it does seem to be used a lot in a desperately try-hard way by people I don't really want to be likened to, so I avoid that as well. Prossie is fine for me :D.
oops yeah didn't think to check if was a repeat post.
Yes prossie to me is what we used to say at school, I think that's maybe one of the reasons i don't mind it either, just reminds me of being daft in school.
and yeah i only use escort for advertising or with clients, I feel like I'm trying to squeeze into the overly glamourised Belle de Jour fantasy in doing so
I'll use sex worker occasionally in a polite context but not over keen on it, its a bit clinical/ administrative sounding plus it doesn't really specifically mean prostitute as I understand it but anyone in the sex trade and I've seen women who just sell content like tit pics online use it . Its like 'I work in the catering industry' as opposed to saying 'cook' or 'waitress' to me.
you're right about that, but then i don't see that as a bad thing, i think it's cool way to encourage solidarity with people working as strippers, cam girls, porn actresses and actors. The administrative side doesn't bother me either as I feel like it reinforces the idea that this is my job, mind you sex worker isn't much better that whore/hooker/prossie on a cv ;D
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I am a prostitute end of.
I still feel uncomfortable using this phrase saying "I'm a prostitute" too often, but I suppose I should just suck it up, that is what I am after all
Like "I'm not a binman, I'm an urban sanitation agent"
(no offence meant to binmen)
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If someone asks me what I do for a living and I feel like being honest, I'll say "sex worker".
"Prostitute" sounds like a legal term rather than a job description to me. I'm not keen on "escort" because it isn't an accurate description of what we do.
In conversation I'm happy to be a hooker, whore, or working girl (albeit the latter is somewhat infantalising and I'm many years off being a girl...)
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you're right about that, but then i don't see that as a bad thing, i think it's cool way to encourage solidarity with people working as strippers, cam girls, porn actresses and actors. The administrative side doesn't bother me either as I feel like it reinforces the idea that this is my job, mind you sex worker isn't much better that whore/hooker/prossie on a cv ;D
Yea I think that's part of it, it changes nothing materially, it still won't help me get a job despite any skills I may have gained in this work, and it won't stop people judging me, in the same way as me calling myself 'curvy' doesn't stop people eyeing me up and thinking 'you mean fat, love?'
I kinda get the solidarity thing in a general sense, but they are different jobs, and my needs, risks and experiences are different to a content seller or cam performer, although I know there will be crossover. I may be being a bit of a cynical old seadog here but when I see someone on Twitter taking selfies and ostensibly 'findomming' calling themselves a 'sex worker' I do come over all all eye roll-y.
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Hello,
A little thought today and I wonder if anyone has had the same thought crossing their mind.
I personally have difficulties calling myself an “escort”. An escort in my view is someone who offers actual companionship, social skills, conversation. A courtesan who is paid first and foremost for her presence and not for a number of “cums”.
Most of this, let’s be honest, is about sex and some punters even get pissy if they don’t spunk at the end of this. As if we’re supposed to be paid per orgasm. The thing starts and finishes with sex, sex alone and in my view it’s quite dishonest to pretend there’s anything more to it or classy about it. I’m much more comfortable describing myself as a prostitute than some sort of “high class” “escort”.
I am aware that someone might be pissed off but there’s no need to add all the fluff and pretend there’s something more to it than that.
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A little thought today and I wonder if anyone has had the same thought crossing their mind.
Pages of them, RR. I'll add that the spelling of the word 'come' done any way other than the way I just have makes me feel faintly sick.
Merged :)
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Cheers x
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Hi everyone,
I believe that words matter, and as sex workers it is up to us to decide which words we find derogatory or offensive.
Does anyone else find the word "prostitute" offensive??
Or is it just me?
If you look in the dictionary at offensive racial words such as the "N word", / "P word", then their definitions are labelled with a warning sign: "Offensive", and a description- "An offensive term to describe a Black/ Asian person."
Similarly, if you look at popular misogynistic words such as "slut", "whore", or "slag" then they are labelled with a warning sign as "derogatory".
Anyway, "Prostitute " is not labelled with such a warning. In fact, "Prostitute " is the DEFAULT word used by the OED (Oxford English Dictionary), to describe a sex worker!!
I.E- Evey euphemism such as "escort", "lady of the night", "call girl",-
Their official definitions all lead back to:- "a prostitute ".
I think we should choose an alternative official definition, if pthers, like me, find the "P" word derogatory.
I reckon "sex worker" should be the standard word.
Or, perhaps "Escort," or I'd even prefer "hooker."
I also believe that "prostitute " needs to be labelled in the OED as "offensive " or "derogatory ".
Who here is with me on this?
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I've merged your post here, WWM, since it's been done to death and the subject is amply covered by the fourteen pages of posts above. The poll has been removed because links are not allowed - this is a discussion board.
I also believe that "prostitute " needs to be labelled in the OED as "offensive " or "derogatory "
You can describe yourself however you wish and find whatever you like offensive, and that is your right. It is not your right to tell other people what to think, especially regarding a completely neutral and factually correct word which everyone understands. 'Prostitute' is not a slur, and just because a word can be used in a derogatory way doesn't make the word itself derogatory.
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I don’t find any of those words derogatory, because let’s face it, that’s what we are. The word that I find offensive lol is courtesan :FF cringe.
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I don’t find any of those words derogatory, because let’s face it, that’s what we are. The word that I find offensive lol is courtesan :FF cringe.
Hahaha yes that word does me in completely, delusional 🤣
Prostitute is not offensive imo it's what we are or do, you can dress it up any way you like but it's still a fact.
Being offended is subjective, what offends me may not offend you and viseversa
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I see it as just a job title. I am a prostitute. If someone wants to call me an escort, hooker or sex worker they can. Whore I think is intended to be more derogatory but its still accurate as far as I’m concerned so I don’t make a fuss.
When I was first thinking about doing this, I would search in google for topics about becoming a prostitute and later I expanded my searches to use terms like escort but to me they are all interchangeable. I’m not going to split hairs trying to make it sound like something it’s not. It’s just being honest with myself.
I know most girls say that the client is paying for our time and not sex but the vast majority of clients are not going to pay to sit and talk about current events or personal interests. If I see a client, I know I’m there for sex.
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True, “prostitute” is a legal term and should be neutral but it’s not and we all know it. People generally have a very negative connotation as soon as they hear it. Like they instantly have an idea about what you’re like, based on how we are portrayed in the media.
“Sex worker” draws attention this is sexual labour and as such we deserve rights and dignity like everyone else.
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We don't 'all' know anything NS, because we're not a single homogenous mass with only one mind between us. Please stick to speaking for yourself and don't claim to speak for others; your opinion reflects your personal experience, not anyone else's.
I've posted on this thread several times already, so as my opinion is here already I'm not going to repeat myself :)
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Whatever we put as a job description, It was probably some dusty old men back in the 1500s that came up with it, Like witch, Whore, Hag and so on. I just dislike any name that's used negatively about women who engage in lots of sex or get paid for sex, But then its subjective and individual. We can call ourselves whatever we feel comfortable with, If was going to be insulted probably Whore would get my back up more than prostitute, I'd probably laugh if someone called me a prostitute, It's like calling a cleaner a cleaner, it's just a job tittle.
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I’m personally very fond of the term ‘harlot’ and might get some business cards with it emblazoned in scarlet lettering.
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I never really had a feeling about it either way as I not out to friends and family and I don't mix personally or professionally with any other sex workers. My accountant iand HMRC are the only ones who know.
However. I totally spat my dummy out after having a police check for a new civvy job and in other information section. Came up as "known prostitute ". Yes this funked me right off. I felt it was used as a warning to protect others from me. I not a criminal. I don't do anything illegal but yet the police feel the need to give that out. Yes its a derogatory term to me when used in certain circumstances.
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I never really had a feeling about it either way as I not out to friends and family and I don't mix personally or professionally with any other sex workers. My accountant iand HMRC are the only ones who know.
However. I totally spat my dummy out after having a police check for a new civvy job and in other information section. Came up as "known prostitute ". Yes this funked me right off. I felt it was used as a warning to protect others from me. I not a criminal. I don't do anything illegal but yet the police feel the need to give that out. Yes its a derogatory term to me when used in certain circumstances.
"Known prostitute?" versus just ...."prostitute"? That's the government in an attempt to slut shame women for something that is perfectly legal. On the other hand how did the government got to find out you were a "known prostitute"? Unless of course you had a problem with a client and police were involved.
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I had a serious stalker that I had to get police involved. I was the victim of a crime. I wasn't the criminal yet they added that info.
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I had a serious stalker that I had to get police involved. I was the victim of a crime. I wasn't the criminal yet they added that info.
Thank you, and that's why I don't involve police whenever I have a problem with a client, because it will be used against me.
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A client years ago informed me that being a prostitute was very much illegal but escorting wasn't.
Ok then. (this was during a booking and I wasn't going to have a debate on it) There are still people believing what we do is breaking the law. 😕
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A client years ago informed me that being a prostitute was very much illegal but escorting wasn't.
I've had that bsfore as well. I was amazed 🤣
However. I totally spat my dummy out after having a police check for a new civvy job and in other information section. Came up as "known prostitute ". Yes this funked me right off. I felt it was used as a warning to protect others from me. I not a criminal. I don't do anything illegal but yet the police feel the need to give that out. Yes its a derogatory term to me when used in certain circumstances.
Surely that's the act rather than the word itself, though. Would it be any different if it had said sex worker or 'escort'?
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I felt the police had no reason to add my profession whatever they want to call it. Would they have done that if I was a plumber! No they wouldn't but the police in my experience always assume that sex work is linked to criminal activity/drugs.
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I never really had a feeling about it either way as I not out to friends and family and I don't mix personally or professionally with any other sex workers. My accountant iand HMRC are the only ones who know.
However. I totally spat my dummy out after having a police check for a new civvy job and in other information section. Came up as "known prostitute ". Yes this funked me right off. I felt it was used as a warning to protect others from me. I not a criminal. I don't do anything illegal but yet the police feel the need to give that out. Yes its a derogatory term to me when used in certain circumstances.
The police put "Independent Escort" in the "Last known occupation" section of my DBS check for a course and voluntary work with vulnerable people.
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I felt the police had no reason to add my profession whatever they want to call it. Would they have done that if I was a plumber! No they wouldn't but the police in my experience always assume that sex work is linked to criminal activity/drugs.
I'd think you have legal grounds to have that removed MB?
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The police put "Independent Escort" in the "Last known occupation" section of my DBS check for a course and voluntary work with vulnerable people.
Hi Mirror. Is your job down on the DBS certificate because it's on your tax return, or because you've had dealings with them in any way do you know?
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I'd think you have legal grounds to have that removed MB?
I tried complaining about it. Apparently it will remain it will not be removed.
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I had something similar a while ago but got it removed on legal grounds.
As for the word "prostitute", I don't have a problem with it because that is what I am.
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Karena
This is just a question to you and anyone it may apply to, If you are asked what you do (as in for a living/job) by anyone you may meet in any situation, do you say it "I am a prostitute"
I never have even though it's what I am.
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Justine,
No I don't. But if, say, anyone who knows what I do calls me a prostitute then I don't mind. I am not offended by the word. And if anyone asked me what I did for a living, not only would I not say I'm a prostitute, I also wouldn't say I'm a courtesan/sex worker etc. ::)
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I haven't read the rest of the thread in detail (yet).
In my case, the word, "whore!!!" was used but
a man, who used it was later reprimanded.
There are some pathetic idiots.
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Hi Mirror. Is your job down on the DBS certificate because it's on your tax return, or because you've had dealings with them in any way do you know?
I have had dealings with them, they have helped when a punter was harassing me, as well as an armed robbery (also punter/client). I did have Escort on my tax return, but I believe it was my dealings with them. During an investigation they asked me to prove I paid tax, and what I put on the tax return. For that reason I don't think they has access to my tax return, this was however 12 years ago.
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That's shocking Mirror that they asked if you paid tax, as if that was relevant to whether they would go after the culprits or not; no wonder many of these scumbags walk around with impunity. Although it's better nowadays I think. The DBS thing is a worry but I don't wanna take the thread off topic. :angel:
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Karena
This is just a question to you and anyone it may apply to, If you are asked what you do (as in for a living/job) by anyone you may meet in any situation, do you say it "I am a prostitute"
I never have even though it's what I am.
If some random person asked me what I do for a living I would give them my regular civy 9-5 job. I don’t openly talk about the fact that I do this work. But if someone already knew what I do asked me to put a label on it I would say I’m a prostitute or an escort or a sex worker. To me they are all interchangeable. I don’t feel any more or less of a sense of shame or embarrassment using one term or the other.
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Sorry to come back to this but I think it's important that people know.
I was worried about this DBS thing and so was my friend who's reported a robber in the past who attacked her whilst working (he was caught, publicly named and shamed, and prosecuted). She contacted the police who were in charge of her case and they have assured her - and also contacted the DBS department for clarification - that no mention of sex work would ever be disclosed on a DBS certificate if a person has reported a crime against them. It's only the person's convictions that go on the DBS certificate, and no mention of escort work should ever be included.
The officer in charge of my friend's case says (And I've read the email myself) that under no way, shape or form would a victim of any offence have this disclosed as part of DBS checks.
It's good that the DBS comes to you first so you can double check before it goes anywhere else - and if the sex work thing ever did come up on it, then you should be able to get it removed.
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Reclaim the term ‘prostitute’ as our own :angel: - it’s used to insult us, but I love calling myself a prostitute >:D - the word is only offensive if you let it be offensive to you
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I have mixed feelings. It has been a bit bogged down with negative associations because people have used it as a byword for having been compromised in some way, like "I don't want to prostitute myself to my company". But as others have said, I see nothing wrong with being a prostitute so really, I should see nothing wrong with the term or need to feel I have to use euphemisms to make other people feel less uncomfortable, because of ignorance/judgement. I guess avoiding the term is just a habit for me.
When I started I used 'working girl' because that was the go to term at the time among the rank and file, which ages me ;D; now I switch between escort, companion or sex worker, depending on the context.
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Reclaim the term ‘prostitute’ as our own :angel: - it’s used to insult us, but I love calling myself a prostitute >:D - the word is only offensive if you let it be offensive to you
That's a beautiful thing to say and I have lived and breathed your philosophy.
if only I was able to be anonymous. I can only hope that our life becomes more accepted.
Why is there such a double standard?
Gay men who do this are celebrated yet women are vilified.
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Sorry to come back to this but I think it's important that people know.
I was worried about this DBS thing and so was my friend who's reported a robber in the past who attacked her whilst working (he was caught, publicly named and shamed, and prosecuted). She contacted the police who were in charge of her case and they have assured her - and also contacted the DBS department for clarification - that no mention of sex work would ever be disclosed on a DBS certificate if a person has reported a crime against them. It's only the person's convictions that go on the DBS certificate, and no mention of escort work should ever be included.
The officer in charge of my friend's case says (And I've read the email myself) that under no way, shape or form would a victim of any offence have this disclosed as part of DBS checks.
It's good that the DBS comes to you first so you can double check before it goes anywhere else - and if the sex work thing ever did come up on it, then you should be able to get it removed.
When I complained about it. I was told very clearly it will stay on. And just because it shouldn't be information included doesn't mean it won't be. I found in my case it was a human who entered that extra information not a database check for crimes that should automatically show up.
The police say one thing and do another.
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I agree MB, the police say one thing and do another. But honestly if you want that taken off, contact NUM's. I'd be interested to see if you get the same response as my friend. Of course, she won't know until she applies for a job that requires a full DBS check and gets the DBS sent to her. Just trying to help because this isn't on when SW's want to move on to other jobs. She was also told that a human (some sort of senior cop) gets to add the information. I don't want SW's to think they shouldn't report a crime against them because this may show on their DBS certificates. If anyone is worried, contact NUM's or ECP's.
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When I complained about it. I was told very clearly it will stay on. And just because it shouldn't be information included doesn't mean it won't be. I found in my case it was a human who entered that extra information not a database check for crimes that should automatically show up.
The police say one thing and do another.
Miss Betty,
It is an outrage that this is included in your DBS check. Not that there is anything wrong with being a prostitute or being called a prostitute (of course), but (exactly as you asked) would they have stated your "known" occupation if you were a plumber? Of course not. The fact of mentioning it in your DBS check - and adding the word "known", similar to e.g. "known criminal", is intended to invite adverse inference, and for that reason is wholly wrong.
I would definitely suggest to try to get it removed. I can recommend a (female) human rights barrister who takes direct access cases, is SW-friendly, and who charges reasonable rates, if that can help you with advice, or action?
I am not a lawyer but my firm belief is that you would be successful to have this removed. The police have recently been forced to delete records of "non-crime hate incidents" following a court order. Clearly, being a prostitute is also a non-crime!
Henry
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Reclaim the term ‘prostitute’ as our own :angel: - it’s used to insult us, but I love calling myself a prostitute >:D - the word is only offensive if you let it be offensive to you
My view entirely!
I am only very part-time and escorting is probably ~3% of my work by time and ~10% by income, but I am very proud to be a (part-time) prostitute, and would use the terms "escort" and "prostitute" interchangeably.
My duo partner (also my wife!) has a much higher % of her time and income escorting, formerly is was 100%/100%, and yes I am also proud of her and proud to be married to a (fellow) prostitute!