SAAFE forum
General Category => Blather and Babble => Topic started by: BBW_Karina on 03 November 2018, 10:08:04 am
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So my one was definitely domination back in Germany. My first one with equipment .
I was in the house and one girl had lots of equipment so I’ve borrowed everything! So proud and greedy I’ve walked in a room with arm full of chains, whipps , gags etc
I’ve made him my dog . With leash on his neck walking him slowly around the room with head high , I completely forgot that’s an attic and smashed my head over the low wall :FF . We start to laugh.
Then I’ve gagged him , whoop him , and ordered to lick me . It was completely rubbish so I’ve keep on punishing him , till I realised that he is still gagged :-[
Later sitting on the armchair with him between my legs I’ve seen doors opening and other girl walking in my room with costumer! Someone messed up which room is busy. To not let my costumer notice I’ve start yelling at him and smashing his ass with a paddle... he left laughing when we finished, saying it was the funniest domination he ever had .
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We watched Red Dwarf together
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I was mid domination booking and I had my client licking up flakes of candle wax from the ground that kept falling from him. The more he moved to lock them up, the more was falling off. The look of horror on his face because he knew he was going to be punished. But instead I burst into histerical laughter, couldn't stop laughing, tears streaming down my face then had to rush to the toilet to pee (2 kids will do that to a bladder in such moments).
Throughout the rest of the session, I kept going into fits of giggles and couldn't shake the image of his "deer caught in headlights" face. Thankfully he was quite into humiliation so thought I was just humiliating him.
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I had an older guy when I first started.
He wore a tight white ladies leather jacket, white crop top string vest and leather trousers. His boxer shorts had Las Vegas designs on them.
He wanted nipple clamps used on him each time I touched his nipple he leapt up in the bed it was like he had received an electric shock.
I couldn't stop laughing after he left!!
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Few days ago with one of my favourite regulars- during Mother and son role play , while he’s forcing me to have sex with him he started to blackmail me - I’ll tell dad !
Couldn’t stop myself and answered- this is not your real father !
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Few days ago with one of my favourite regulars- during Mother and son role play , while he’s forcing me to have sex with him he started to blackmail me - I’ll tell dad !
Couldn’t stop myself and answered- this is not your real father !
If this is in West Midlands I've seen him too! All in good fun but I did tell him to warn ladies when he booked because a lot of people won't do incest roleplay and would have kicked his skinny arse out the door without a refund.
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If this is in West Midlands I've seen him too! All in good fun but I did tell him to warn ladies when he booked because a lot of people won't do incest roleplay and would have kicked his skinny arse out the door without a refund.
In SE London
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HA HA HA... Haven't laughed so much in ages....THANK YOU ALL...I needed some light relief! So, my last strange/funny whatever-you-want-to-call it booking, is actually a regular role play guy. The last role play went like this: I had to dress up in old lady clothes (think Nora Batty), put hair in rollers, 40 denier skin colour tights, flat shoes, glasses, pinny. I then have to serve us tea in a proper tea pot etc etc, I then have to start drinking my tea, and act as if I have been poisoned. Said client then carries me to bed (I HAVE TO ACT ALL FLOPPY!), he then takes my rollers out, strips me naked, comes over my tits and leaves! Nothing shocks me anymore. Nothing! :FF
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The guy that howled.
There was just so much about this one punt that makes me giggle now.
The clothes he wore when I arrived.
The conversation we had.
He was supposed to be a seasoned Dom, and it was apparent he was a novice. At some point, I took over, and I had never Dommed before.
Then the howling.
After we had finished I walked into his living room after having a shower and getting dressed. His neighbour was sitting there having a friendly chat.
Have been back a few times since. The first time the neighbour joined us, and he howled neighbour couldn't stop laughing and mentioned that they had wondered about the random occasional howling ;D
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Not so much the actual bookings as such but I once won a competition for a 7 night stay at a really nice 5* romantic hotel with all breakfasts and an afternoon tea one day thrown in, a few spa treatments
it didn't tie in with any of my plans for the time frame you had to use it by, as things were tight money wise so really needed to carry on working
But I decided I would go anyway but work from the hotel instead!!
it just gave me a little buzz each time I pulled a punter
couldnt help but chuckle when the company running the competition rang up afterwards to ask how the prize had been for their little promo thing, I couldn't stop with the superlatives ;D
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Thinking of the actual bookings
one particular chap I ended up seeing a lot, booked me for 3 hours and as soon as I arrived he decided he was starving hungry and would I mind if we ordered pizza instead? He was a big guy and ordered two XXL pizzas with all the trimmings, desserts and drinks. Ate the whole lot including most of mine, then said would he mind if he could book again for the next night, as he'd slightly overdone it and was now too full for any action
so another 3 hours the next night...and he did exactly the same thing again - except he said he was bored of pizza and would I mind if we had a chinese ;D
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I've remembered a few more that made me chuckle.
A really posh public school boy who wanted caning. As he was wanking himself off he exclaimed in perfect RP English, "Here it comes. HERE. IT. COMES!"
Very matter of fact manual tradesman who was a "get undressed straight away after money changes hands" type, no problem for me. No HR or oral requested, just wanted to go straight into doggy. Fucked me for about 45 seconds then pulled out and said very politely, "Thank you." It was just the way he said it that made me stifle a giggle.
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Right at the start of the booking I spill a glass of red wine all down my beautiful lacey cream underwear set, so we have a little awkward giggle about it and start taking my clothes off to brush off the awkwardness. I'm trying to save the session by turning around, bending down and taking my knickers off slowly and showing off my ass.
I fling my knickers to what I thought was on the floor. I always have a big candle lit on the bedside table and the knickers landed on the candle. At this point we didn't realise until we both turned around to find the my knickers on FIRE :o :o. I pick them up in their flamming glory and run through the apartment to find a sink to throw them in ;D
The topping on the cake was he pulled out one of my hair extensions once things continued and it landed on his crotch :o
He still gave me a positive review ;D ;D
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An estate agent who is a reg of mine (if I ever start renting places out I will be managing them myself. Oh and I will never, ever leave workmen alone in my place)
We were in one of the vacant properties they have just taken on.
Dodgy electrics and the lights were flickering, when we dimmed them enough they seemed to coincide with the music. So he stands on the bed to take out a bulb, finally gets it out and made no difference to the brightness.
When we arrived at the place he opened the freezer to chill a bottle of wine. The door fell off.
Took ages for us to work out how to put the heating on, and spent a lot of time fully dressed.
Went to close the curtains, the whole lot fell down.
One thing he enjoys is getting me to sit on a chair, so I obliged, the back of the chair fell off.
Power went off during the meet, not sure what tripped the electrics.
Toilet didn't flush properly.
There was just so much odd random stuff happen that we spent most of the meet in hysterics. I said it was karma for using his clients property that he only got a bj in the 3 hours.
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Next door to his mom's bedroom, he said she wouldn't bother us. ???
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One client was going down on me and his phone sat nav announced 'you have arrived at your destination'.
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One client was going down on me and his phone sat nav announced 'you have arrived at your destination'.
That is so funny!!! Good old technology!!!
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Oh my goodness keep these coming, I really needed a good laugh today! ;D
Any kind of roleplay sessions usually make me giggle. My favourite was with a realllyy posh boy who wanted a 'chavvy/roadgirl' semi dom RP. I think I said something like 'I'm gonna make you shop at Lidl' and we both just cracked up lol
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That is so funny!!! Good old technology!!!
hahaha I know, I was like 'oh aye so you have'.
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I said something like 'I'm gonna make you shop at Lidl' and we both just cracked up lol
Reminded me of the guy who wanted housewife roleplay
I said something about going shopping and bogof
He phoned the next morning for his free session :FF :FF :FF :FF
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I said something like 'I'm gonna make you shop at Lidl' and we both just cracked up lol
Oh god that's gold. Next time a client asks for "slutty" roleplay I'm definitely using that one!
(I shop at Aldi and Lidl all the time BTW)
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Had a few tgirls/transvesites over years.
One particular was so convincing and s/he did look convincingly hot :)
Some though have been particularly bad! Some just can’t look convincing however hard they try!
One looked so bad it was total comedy, dressed in a dress, nylons, spouting a beard as well!
He’d booked a girl girl. Me and a friend turned up and almost collapsed in fits of laughter. Can remember being alone in the bathroom giggling, trying to keep a straight face as “Andrea” waited outside!
To perform together, keep composed and professional and not explode into fits of laughter was almost impossible! We got through it and later when he left we hit the bar and laughed and laughed all night!
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I wrote about this one before
Had a client who wanted a mother in law role play
We did this role play and he brought clothes for me to wear. Sort of older lady think Maggie Thatcher power suits but all very good quality from shops like Jaguar and Harvey Nicks. Even brought the shows in the style that the Queen wears with a stubby sensible heel luckily they fitted me .
Afterwards he was very carefully packing away the clothes into suit bags and I asked him what his plans were for the rest of the day - just general chit chat
“Oh I’m taking this stuff to the charity shop they belonged to my dead mother in law she passed away a few month ago “
I’m rarely speechless but this guy managed that 😂
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I wrote about this one before
Had a client who wanted a mother in law role play
We did this role play and he brought clothes for me to wear. Sort of older lady think Maggie Thatcher power suits but all very good quality from shops like Jaguar and Harvey Nicks. Even brought the shows in the style that the Queen wears with a stubby sensible heel luckily they fitted me .
Afterwards he was very carefully packing away the clothes into suit bags and I asked him what his plans were for the rest of the day - just general chit chat
“Oh I’m taking this stuff to the charity shop they belonged to my dead mother in law she passed away a few month ago “
I’m rarely speechless but this guy managed that 😂
:-X :-X :-X :o :(
I might have been tempted to ask for them for role play not really sure
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Right at the start of the booking I spill a glass of red wine all down my beautiful lacey cream underwear set, so we have a little awkward giggle about it and start taking my clothes off to brush off the awkwardness. I'm trying to save the session by turning around, bending down and taking my knickers off slowly and showing off my ass.
I fling my knickers to what I thought was on the floor. I always have a big candle lit on the bedside table and the knickers landed on the candle. At this point we didn't realise until we both turned around to find the my knickers on FIRE :o :o. I pick them up in their flamming glory and run through the apartment to find a sink to throw them in ;D
The topping on the cake was he pulled out one of my hair extensions once things continued and it landed on his crotch :o
He still gave me a positive review ;D ;D
Absolutely effing howling hahahaha, this made my day. Xx
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He wanted school girl role play, I think I was a little too realistic with my sarcastic teenage remarks, both of us were howling though. Also I went to turn shower on for a guy not realising the shower head was pointing at me.... Again we were both howling
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Had a guy ask me to put Tabasco sauce up his ass when he was about to cum .x
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something happened to me yesterday for the 1st time since becoming an escort many years ago. A guy books me for an hour at midday..i said yes that's fine,and if u want to make it any earlier just let me know. then I get a call from another punter asking if I could do half hour at 11am...I thought that works in well before my midday one. Mr 11am shows up ,and we got on so well we were just chatting after the job was done. suddenly theres a knock on the door...mr midday on the doorstep,20 mins early!! I was mortified, I looked like a scarecrow...told him to go and sit in the lounge and wait there. Then I ran to the bedroom and Mr 11am has run out my back door with his clothes and got dressed in the yard outside, before making his escape.I told mr midday to go and wait for me in bed while I got ready for him lol.,..luckily he was a good laugh and very understanding. That will NOT be happening again ;D
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With a client when the door buzzer goes. It's usually some Deliverpoo ringing every bell so I normally ignore it. But this spidy sense made me check it out on the intercom and it's only the flippin handyman with his grouting tool. It had to be done and would only take a minute. So I told the client not to worry, he wasn't coming into the bedroom. Jeans on, lipstick off, small talk with handyman, then back to work.
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That reminds me I had the landlords handyman in during some work, he was taking ages and my client turned up. Luckily the landlord knew what I was up to because I had to make him swear to keep quiet and not come out of the kitchen while I went and did the booking. Came back to the biggest grin ever, it was then that I realised how paperthin the walls were ;D
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Had a client last night fall over banging his head on my dressing table , while loosing his balance taking his trousers off . Fortunately he was not hurt and we both saw the funny side afterwards
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Hotel outcall, he opened the door, said hello and led me in, all very gentlemanly. I looked around and saw another man sitting patiently in the room. I was a bit puzzled as it wasn't a multi-job. The man who greeted me was the interpreter and the waiting guy was his employer. He introduced us nicely and told me what his boss required. It felt like a blind date with a matchmaker helping us out. Russian mafia ;D
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Hotel outcall, he opened the door, said hello and led me in, all very gentlemanly. I looked around and saw another man sitting patiently in the room. I was a bit puzzled as it wasn't a multi-job. The man who greeted me was the interpreter and the waiting guy was his employer. He introduced us nicely and told me what his boss required. It felt like a blind date with a matchmaker helping us out. Russian mafia ;D
Bloody hell! So you were not informed of this in advance during the arrangements? ie: Did the caller/emailer/texter let you believe he was the client throughout ? >:(
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This has just reminded me of when I first started, a decade ago. I had an Outcall with a chap who, had very slight learning disabilities. Nothing major, in fact I'm struggling to recall what it was in particular..He conversed really well on the phone and mentioned a "Dickie leg" or something.
When I arrived, I was greeted by a carer at his door who stayed in the parlour throughout.
I had been told nothing about this in advance..
Awkward :-\
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I once had an eccentric rich bdsm client. During one booking I was dressed as a cat whilst he fucked me from behind with "flight of the bumblebee " on (that classical song with the really fast flute) held back the laughter so hard. It was so surreal xxx
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This thread just shows how funny this job can be and it isn't all work or mentally draining!
Too many to remember all now but two which still make me smile at the memory.
Years ago I used to visit a very old man, he was late eighties and a widower then but sprightly enough. He thought of himself as some kind of dom master but looking back he was terrible at it. On my arrival he brought out the tea set and "fancy" biscuits and we had that (it was always a 2 hr booking) while we talked then he would go into the hall and open the cupboard door. Looking like father xmas he came back to the living room with a huge black bin bag over his shoulder. It contained all his dom stuff to tie me to the chair and shackle me to the door with those over door devices plus other items we never got around to using and it took him so long to do it all I just thought this is nice I am paid for doing nothing here.
No real sex as he couldn't but he liked to touch me and play with my body while I was helpless. Easy but boring for me but what happened next was the funniest bit. End of session and he placed everything back in the plastic sack. He tied the top with string which had a label attached. In case of death please dispose of this bag without opening.
His son lived a few miles away and the old guy told me (each time I visited) that if he died in his sleep his son would never find out his dad's secret as he would do as instructed on the label and not look in the sack.
I think he really believed this is how it would happen.
Eventually I stopped seeing him as he became so possessive and wanted me to meet him out of hours and just talk but I wasn't interested. I am sure he will have passed on to the dungeon in the sky by now.
I have another funny one but will save for later as my dog wants his breakfast and keeps pawing me. ;D
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Ok the other comical booking was yet another older man who loved to be spanked hard! The cane and only the cane would do after the warm up with my hands. He used to tell me about a man who visited him who thrashed him over his knee and for a long time I wondered was he making it up.
So one visit I said I would get a thrill out of watching this to see what he would say. He invited me to his little flat a few weeks later and said this other man was due and had said ok to me watching.
My client met me off the train and we walked to his place. I was asked to sit in the living room to wait for his friend to emerge when ready. There was to be no talking from any of us. Few minutes later in walked the dom, in drag! I wasn't told about that but hey I was happy just to be there and a little suprised my client had not been just fantasising and telling me porkies.
The dom/drag person had the biggest hands I have ever seen on a man, shovels! He was wearing a flared short skirt and nylon blouse, scuffed high heels in what looked like size 12's No makeup but the thing that had me choking back my giggles was his wig! Long synthetic black and it was not even on his head properly.
I was not getting paid and only stayed 20 minutes or so, I just sat in silence and watched my client over his knee getting a sore backside. Apparently after I quietly let myself out their session heated up and he got the cane and gawd knows what else.
:)
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Comedy gold ;D OMG Justine as I was reading...I though you meant in case of your death !! :o
Phoenix- Yes, the interpreter rung me up pretending to be the client, but they were so blue chip corporate about the whole thing I rolled with it.
I'd be thinking thinking about the carer twiddling his thumbs ;D a bit distracting?
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Comedy gold ;D OMG Justine as I was reading...I though you meant in case of your death !! :o
Phoenix- Yes, the interpreter rung me up pretending to be the client, but they were so blue chip corporate about the whole thing I rolled with it.
I'd be thinking thinking about the carer twiddling his thumbs ;D a bit distracting?
Yes, twiddling something no doubt :-\ (hoping it was the mantlepiece candlesticks.. He was on paid time after all..)
It's one of those things I always confirm before accepting a booking now.. No drugs, no heavy alcohol... No other persons present ::)
Justine, your posts are fascinating always and loving this thread ;D
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Forgot my reason for posting..
Yes, the wigs! ;D
I see a few transvestites and they often wear the cheapest most comical wigs..They are usually the hugest of men too. I imagine it's quite costly to source lingerie and stilettoes in their size 🤔
The moment they cum, they whip off the offending headpiece and revert to alpha male police officer/Road worker/lorry Driver etc ;)
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Mine was a girl/girl cam session. The guy produced a puppet snowman, and entertained us with funny stories rather than us getting him off. He had us in stitches, and we got paid for it too. Win win.
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Mine was a girl/girl cam session. The guy produced a puppet snowman, and entertained us with funny stories rather than us getting him off. He had us in stitches, and we got paid for it too. Win win.
LOL This actually reminded me of a blind date I went on many many years ago, pre escorting days. Was sat in a bar with this guy with my back to the door. He looked beyond me towards the door as if he had seen someone walk in and said 'hope you don't mind but I've bought a friend with me'. Thought it very odd but turned round towards the door to see who was coming, noone, but when I turned back to face him he had a sock puppet on his hand and said 'I'd like you to meet my best friend Wally' :o :o. I was mortified and promptly said just going to the loo and climbed out the window!! Thank god it was pre mobile too otherwise I'd have probably never got rid of him LOL
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LOL This actually reminded me of a blind date I went on many many years ago, pre escorting days. Was sat in a bar with this guy with my back to the door. He looked beyond me towards the door as if he had seen someone walk in and said 'hope you don't mind but I've bought a friend with me'. Thought it very odd but turned round towards the door to see who was coming, noone, but when I turned back to face him he had a sock puppet on his hand and said 'I'd like you to meet my best friend Wally' :o :o. I was mortified and promptly said just going to the loo and climbed out the window!! Thank god it was pre mobile too otherwise I'd have probably never got rid of him LOL
:D :D :D :D