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Author Topic: The "I love you" death knell from an otherwise lovely, and great fun client.  (Read 16433 times)

Hadley

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Just that really - why do they do it!

The client I'm referring to is a great guy, lots of fun and we get on well together. I don't fancy him but have a brilliant time with him - I really do think "great" when he books as he's a lovely man!

It's also quite lucrative as he books every week or more. Perfect.

However now he's decide to drop the "L" bomb, which as we all know means that you either have the choice of saying it back (which I wouldn't, being an honest gal) and be expected to see him for free (you know, because you luurrve each other) or saying as nicely/ casually/kindly as you can that you're not interested. Which will of course mean that he will never book you again.

I think I'm particularly irritated because this person has never, ever, asked anything about me. He doesn't know my name, my marital status, my background, my real personality, anything about my hobbies, or anything about my daily life. Yet he loves me, apparently, on the basis of the fantasy that I (am paid to) project.

Which in summary means a very nice client, with the associated income stream, goes down the toilet.

So very annoying.

xx
"Why do people say "grow some balls"? Balls are weak and sensitive. If you wanna be tough, grow a vagina. Those things can take a pounding."

-Betty White

Lois01827

  • Guest
Just that really - why do they do it!

The client I'm referring to is a great guy, lots of fun and we get on well together. I don't fancy him but have a brilliant time with him - I really do think "great" when he books as he's a lovely man!

It's also quite lucrative as he books every week or more. Perfect.

However now he's decide to drop the "L" bomb, which as we all know means that you either have the choice of saying it back (which I wouldn't, being an honest gal) and be expected to see him for free (you know, because you luurrve each other) or saying as nicely/ casually/kindly as you can that you're not interested. Which will of course mean that he will never book you again.

I think I'm particularly irritated because this person has never, ever, asked anything about me. He doesn't know my name, my marital status, my background, my real personality, anything about my hobbies, or anything about my daily life. Yet he loves me, apparently, on the basis of the fantasy that I (am paid to) project.

Which in summary means a very nice client, with the associated income stream, goes down the toilet.

So very annoying.

xx

This resonates with me so strongly - I've briefly posted something about it elsewhere.

I have been seeing a client twice a week, sometimes three times for the past month or so. After each visit, the texts become more intrusive, more irritating and more of an invasion of my privacy. The ole 'I won't bug you by text but.....'.

The upshot is the latter messages were stating that he needs to know he's special (he's not), needs to know he is the most important guy I see (he's not) and needs me to inform him when I'm seeing other guys (errr, nope!). Would text war and peace telling me trivial aspects of his life that had no bearing on me at all. On two occasions I basically told him he needs to back off or I can't see him. He promised he would. Last week I message him saying if this continues I'm not seeing him, nor will there be another chance. Cheeky twat responded that He couldn't see me anymore as there was feelings involved. If I'm honest, I thought 'thank fuck for that'. Then 5 minutes later he said, 'I didn't mean, I'm just in L with you'  :FF I then said, sorry, that's it, I'm not seeing you anymore because you are taking the piss and making me feel completely uncomfortable. Take care and don't contact me again. I didn't hear anything until yesterday afternoon and got this essay about life being too short to fall out and can I give him another chance as he 'Wasn't that bad?'. Talk about needy!! I basically said, no chance, it's done and I'm not interested. Today ffs, I get a text saying I'm deleting your number now yadda, yadda and waffled on. I didn't answer and have just blocked him.

I'll be honest; up until last week when I told him I wouldn't be seeing him again I was getting more and more bothered by the latter text messages. You know when you're out somewhere and you feel like a creep is eyeballing you? It got to be like that. This guy was also lucrative and really good company but within a short time, he became needy, possessive, annoying and downright creepy.

I'm relieved he has gone and I hope guys like him are few and far between - for all of us WGs xx

BlaqHarlot

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I totally understand. This happened to me and I'm sure plenty of other girls.
Great client, couldn't fault him for anything, he was great company and I enjoyed seeing him, the 30+ year age gap didn't seem to make a difference and we were able to converse on all levels.

He saw me once a week every week, sometimes twice. Then he said he loved me, a few months back. Like you, he hadn't really asked identifying information about me, he asked what I do aside from this and I would give a brief answer. He loved the GFE and again like you fell in love with the fantasy. And told me how he loved me and that he would love to give things a go... What?! I sent him a nice email stating that I don't feel the same and I'm sorry to let him down, I also said that I couldn't see him again now that he's said he's fallen in love with me as it could blur the lines and make him think it's more than what it is. I also wouldn't want to take money from someone who is deluding themselves into thinking I feel the same as them.

Obviously he was upset and stated he could put his feelings aside, which is rubbish. I've had this happen before and as soon as that client said he loved me I stopped seeing him and he started stalking me so I wouldn't take the risk again with this guy. He begged me to continue seeing him and I told him No my mind won't change.

It's been about 5 months now and still now he tries to contact me. I blocked his AW, and he emailed me instead (my email is visible on my profile) and has used different numbers to contact me, luckily he hasn't tried to hide who he is, he's just said "please give me another chance" I haven't replied to any messages. But it goes to show that I made the right decision not seeing him if he's still pestering months later. He's a 55 year old man, told me he's single and doesn't have any kids not much friends so probably is lonely. Whereas I'm 22, and my life is completely different. He needs to realise in the nicest way possible if it wasn't for me escorting I wouldn't have taken a second look at him in the street.

It's really annoying you lose a perfectly good client to them losing their head in a couple hours of fantasy! I feel for you, but look on the bright side, one regular goes another one is always round the corner! Lol x
« Last Edit: 15 December 2015, 04:57:51 pm by DesignerWhore »

TrashAzn

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Unfortunately it's an occupational hazard. Some guys doing this are incredibly needy and quickly become obsessed with girls to a point they don't see the reality that this is a business. It's the same as guys who are a regular at a pub or cafe and they strike up a rapport with a cute waitress then they think something is going on when they just like the tips he gives. Many of them have issues letting go of a fantasy when reality comes around to bite them in the ass. Some of them really are deluded though like 60 year olds who think a girl of 19/20 would want to spend time with them if they were not paying them for it.

Nia Hope

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No client has ever said they love me  :(
If something is not perceived it doesn't exist.

Lois01827

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No client has ever said they love me  :(

Thank your lucky stars Nia  ;D it becomes an uncomfortable ball ache

Hadley

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I just think it's such an ungentlemanly thing to do.

Both the escort and client know that, at heart, this is a business transaction. However both parties expect a little kindness, friendliness and humanity both ways, to ensure both the escort and client enjoy their time and leave happy.

However dropping the "L" bomb kills all that. There are certain expectations set up during the structure of the booking designed not to reveal the "bare bones" of the sex for money transaction. The first is the payment - it is expected that the gentleman would offer the money; either without prompting, or with a very gentle reminder (do you have something for me please?) Should the gentleman be so rude as to ignore that, the girl then has to directly ask for money, which kills the fa?ade.

The same with the declaration of love - by transgressing the boundaries of the escort / client business relationship the girl is then forced into the humiliating position of verbalising the sex for money contract. Once again embarrassing and awkward, ruining what would otherwise be a nice time.

"Why do people say "grow some balls"? Balls are weak and sensitive. If you wanna be tough, grow a vagina. Those things can take a pounding."

-Betty White

Nia Hope

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No client has ever said they love me  :(

Thank your lucky stars Nia  ;D it becomes an uncomfortable ball ache
I can imagine, what Hadley said about this guy not really knowing her is typical. Clients must think we are always shaved, buffed, made up and horny. Perhaps invite him over to lounge about eating and watching tv in your pjs and tell him you've got a headache when he wants a fuck, that might change his mind!
If something is not perceived it doesn't exist.

BlaqHarlot

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Unfortunately it's an occupational hazard. Some guys doing this are incredibly needy and quickly become obsessed with girls to a point they don't see the reality that this is a business. It's the same as guys who are a regular at a pub or cafe and they strike up a rapport with a cute waitress then they think something is going on when they just like the tips he gives. Many of them have issues letting go of a fantasy when reality comes around to bite them in the ass. Some of them really are deluded though like 60 year olds who think a girl of 19/20 would want to spend time with them if they were not paying them for it.
I agree. Like in my situation, as a young girl what would I want with a 55 year old man? I don't mean that in a nasty way, my point is, at my age the guys are go for are around my age or 30s and I find attractive. This man was your average Joe, slightly overweight but polite man. And he really believed that we could "give it a go".

It's kind of sad that some men are so lonely they delude themselves into thinking paying for escorts and getting great services or the fact she let you stay over time for 20 mins automatically means she wants to date you. It doesn't! The way I see it is, if she's not fucking you for free, she's not interested.

They really need to realise it's a fantasy they pay for and most of us are just nice girls who like to meet new people and engage in conversation this doesn't mean we want a relationship. I am so thankful for my regulars who know the score and understand it's business transaction!

Lois01827

  • Guest
It'll be rather interesting over the Christmas period as to how much some lonely guys may try and push the feelings/attachment thing..... Loneliest time of the year for some; however, 'Good will to all men' does not translate to 'Extended willy suck for lonely men'  ::)

katrina

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Sorry to be cynical but after several similar experiences when clients say 'I love you'  I translate it into 'I really like spending time with you and having great sex with you but I really don't want to pay any more, so because you're such a nice person I'll play on your feelings in the hope that you will fall in love with me then I'll be able to see you for free'.



Its good that he's not asking you personal questions or trying to find out things about you, I would play him at his own game and say something like 'I'm quite fond of you too, but lets just enjoy our time together and not spoil things'. That's not being dishonest but not leading him on either :-) 

Jezabel

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I had this a few months ago with 2 clients. My policy is to ignore, I simply refuse to engage in their fantasy! Often a lack of enthusiasm or a brief silence works wonders, they will start to feel awkward and drop the subject. Should they persist I make it absolutely clear to them that I don't date or do anything outside of the client/escort relationship.

The last one was a very needy guy, after saying the L word he then said he wanted us to go out to dinner the next time....my marked lack of interest got thro to him. I'm dammed if I'm going to be made to feel bad because of their neuroses!

He still wanted to book me again, only he picked a time when I wasn't working. I doubt he'll try it again but if he does I will make it clear its a no go and consider not seeing him again.

Lois01827

  • Guest
Sorry to be cynical but after several similar experiences when clients say 'I love you'  I translate it into 'I really like spending time with you and having great sex with you but I really don't want to pay any more, so because you're such a nice person I'll play on your feelings in the hope that you will fall in love with me then I'll be able to see you for free'.

Very true for some guys yes; but in my particular case, there was no mention of the money being an issue (or he'd have been out the door before he had chance to blink). It was more the suffocation by emotion that really pissed me off and weighed me down - it was exhausting  ::)

katrina

  • Guest
Sorry to be cynical but after several similar experiences when clients say 'I love you'  I translate it into 'I really like spending time with you and having great sex with you but I really don't want to pay any more, so because you're such a nice person I'll play on your feelings in the hope that you will fall in love with me then I'll be able to see you for free'.

Very true for some guys yes; but in my particular case, there was no mention of the money being an issue (or he'd have been out the door before he had chance to blink). It was more the suffocation by emotion that really pissed me off and weighed me down - it was exhausting  ::)


Oh yes, that type are even worse, its so draining, like an emotional vacuum sucking the life out of you! I've had them wanting to be 'my baby', my lover, others have wanted to be my 'rock' , my best friend and the latest wants to be 'owned' by me. I like the ones who just book some time, pay, have a good time and go, I can't be doing with being an emotional dustbin for these types, brain drain isn't worth the money.

Lois01827

  • Guest
Sorry to be cynical but after several similar experiences when clients say 'I love you'  I translate it into 'I really like spending time with you and having great sex with you but I really don't want to pay any more, so because you're such a nice person I'll play on your feelings in the hope that you will fall in love with me then I'll be able to see you for free'.

Very true for some guys yes; but in my particular case, there was no mention of the money being an issue (or he'd have been out the door before he had chance to blink). It was more the suffocation by emotion that really pissed me off and weighed me down - it was exhausting  ::)


Oh yes, that type are even worse, its so draining, like an emotional vacuum sucking the life out of you! I've had them wanting to be 'my baby', my lover, others have wanted to be my 'rock' , my best friend and the latest wants to be 'owned' by me. I like the ones who just book some time, pay, have a good time and go, I can't be doing with being an emotional dustbin for these types, brain drain isn't worth the money.

Indeed  ;D I've no idea why some guys see themselves as a saviour - a saviour of what exactly I don't know... another of mine who I stopped seeing weeks ago because of the emotional suckage wanting me to call him 'sugar daddy' and only see him. I could have acted all that out, but playing with his hideously long nips for 2 hours just gave me dead arms... he couldn't get hard for one reason or another (medical). I'd rather he had though as it would have been less taxing than two hours of pensioner nipple mauling  :o