SAAFE forum
General Category => Blather and Babble => Topic started by: BadBell on 16 July 2016, 12:55:14 am
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I don't know what it is about the blokes I see. Id say they are mostly spotless. But even the cleanest of men can have sweaty arseholes. Ive lost count of the times ive had to throw hair extensions away because my lock synthetic locks have dangled in there arse cracks causing them to stink. Ive just given oral to a very handsome very clean man. But as soon as I got my head near his arse it was like running into a wall of stale shit. I find this a bigger problem then dirty penis's. Anyone else feel my pain?
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I don't know what it is about the blokes I see. Id say they are mostly spotless. But even the cleanest of men can have sweaty arseholes. Ive lost count of the times ive had to throw hair extensions away because my lock synthetic locks have dangled in there arse cracks causing them to stink. Ive just given oral to a very handsome very clean man. But as soon as I got my head near his arse it was like running into a wall of stale shit. I find this a bigger problem then dirty penis's. Anyone else feel my pain?
Just keep your hair, nose and tongue away from their arseholes and you should be fine.
I have really long and really thick hair extensions and mine never smell of shit or sweaty arseholes lol.
I have noticed a stench many times but what can you do, it's an occupational hazard I guess.
As long as the bits I'm getting intimate with are clean, I'm fine.
xx
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I *heart* the title of this thread!!! :D ;D
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I don't know what it is about the blokes I see. Id say they are mostly spotless. But even the cleanest of men can have sweaty arseholes. Ive lost count of the times ive had to throw hair extensions away because my lock synthetic locks have dangled in there arse cracks causing them to stink. Ive just given oral to a very handsome very clean man. But as soon as I got my head near his arse it was like running into a wall of stale shit. I find this a bigger problem then dirty penis's. Anyone else feel my pain?
Oh yes I feel your pain :( With a smelly cock I can always ask them to wash it or even playfully say lets go and give it a nice soapy rinse in the sink ;) the ones I've done that to seem to enjoy it, but how on earth do you say to a client "Excuse me but your ass stinks !!" I've got a very strong sense of smell too so even the tiniest whiff of shitty ass can put me off my lunch :FF
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I *heart* the title of this thread!!! :D ;D
My sides are aching with laughter omg if any potential clients are reading this they will be convinced we really hate them lmfao ;D
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I ask EVERYONE to shower before we start no matter what, don't care if they smell Devine knowing they had a shower just before they left the house as I made that mistake once at the very start of me offering OWO and once I was down there and had the cock in my mouth, it was very clear the client had been to the toilet at some point between having his shower and getting to my flat. I was nearly sick which meant I couldn't do my job as enthusiastically as I would like and I was too embarrassed to say anything. He didn't have much to say either so it was a very awkward booking.
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Coming up a close second is stale pissy pubes :o There's no getting away from the fact that anyone with that unmistakeable smell hasn't showered for at least half a day...
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My sides are aching with laughter omg if any potential clients are reading this they will be convinced we really hate them lmfao ;D
On the flip side, I'm sure there are plenty of women/escorts out there with stinky sweaty arseholes :-X
Some people don't think to wash their arseholes thoroughly since their nose isn't anywhere near their arse, they can't smell it.
Some people do a pooh and think toilet roll is adequate cleaning when it's not.
There are also plenty of women/escorts with stinky vaginas too.
We deal with men day in and day out which would make it seem like we think all men are eejits and weirdos but in actual fact, it's just humans in general that are eejits and weirdos. If there were more women looking to book an escort then I'm sure you'd realise how many odd women there were too.
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Coming up a close second is stale pissy pubes :o There's no getting away from the fact that anyone with that unmistakeable smell hasn't showered for at least half a day...
Yeah I've had that and it's revolting. There's one client just now that I'm actively trying to avoid for this reason.
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I don't quite understand how they can be spotless everywhere but, Perhaps we all stink and we should sniff each other out as a way of saying hello like dogs do lol
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I don't quite understand how they can be spotless everywhere but, Perhaps we all stink and we should sniff each other out as a way of saying hello like dogs do lol
I think good clean escorts/woman really scrub their bits for fear of any horrid smells or taste whereas that doesn't really occur to most people.
I have always been obsessively clean everywhere because I would be mortified if anyone thought I had a stinky fu fu or asshole.
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Yeah I've had that and it's revolting. There's one client just now that I'm actively trying to avoid for this reason.
I've held back from complaining but seeing as we're on the subject...My client yesterday had a real stinky cock, sweaty balls, stinky shitty ass, sweat rash (or whatever it was!) between his thighs...It was horrific :o I didn't mind giving a bit of a peck on the mouth but no way was I going near that cock and balls!!! Luckily he had come for a tie and tease so he was blindfolded and tied to the bed...It was that bad that everything I had used on him in the session got chucked in the bin, towel, vibrator I used on my gloved hands on his ass, whip, paddle..I was taking no chances.
Regarding women being as bad yes that's true, I've gone down on some in couples bookings and been horrified at the stale smell of sweaty pubes and ass holes, horrible smells coming from the vagina :-X
This sounds a bit bitchy I know and a generalisation but I've found other escorts to be cleaner and body aware than a lot of non escorting ones.
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I've held back from complaining but seeing as we're on the subject...My client yesterday had a real stinky cock, sweaty balls, stinky shitty ass, sweat rash (or whatever it was!) between his thighs...It was horrific :o I didn't mind giving a bit of a peck on the mouth but no way was I going near that cock and balls!!! Luckily he had come for a tie and tease so he was blindfolded and tied to the bed...It was that bad that everything I had used on him in the session got chucked in the bin, towel, vibrator I used on my gloved hands on his ass, whip, paddle..I was taking no chances.
Regarding women being as bad yes that's true, I've gone down on some in couples bookings and been horrified at the stale smell of sweaty pubes and ass holes, horrible smells coming from the vagina :-X
This sounds a bit bitchy I know and a generalisation but I've found other escorts to be cleaner and body aware than a lot of non escorting ones.
You definitely get lots of sex workers who run a revolving door, not washing in between so I can understand why some clients might be a bit hesitant thinking all sex workers must be dirty but if only they knew that in actual fact, the majority of us are more cleaner and safer than most of the general public as we (should) shower multiple times per day, (should) shower freshly just before they arrive and we should all be taking our sexual health seriously whereas I've been told by the clinic that most people in civvie life don't go to the clinic unless they have (or think they have) symptoms.
Your client yesterday sounds horrific and I wouldn't feel bad in the slightest calling him a filthy disrespectful bugger and tell him to leave. He clearly doesn't have any respect for himself letting his personal hygiene get to that level so there's no way he's gonna have enough respect for you to be clean for you.
xx
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Perhaps we all stink and we should sniff each other out as a way of saying hello like dogs do lol
I use andrex wet wipes as well as toilet roll after going to the loo and also even when I've just showered I splash a bit of water on my vag if I've had a wee when a clients on the way to rinse it off but...The other day I let a client who was really keen on putting his cock in my ass, put just the end in...After he took it out I could faintly smell poo on the condom :( As I generally don't do anal sex with clients I found it a bit off putting, he loved it and wanted more!! ???
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I use andrex wet wipes as well as toilet roll after going to the loo and also even when I've just showered I splash a bit of water on my vag if I've had a wee when a clients on the way to rinse it off but...The other day I let a client who was really keen on putting his cock in my ass, put just the end in...After he took it out I could faintly smell poo on the condom :( As I generally don't do anal sex with clients I found it a bit off putting, he loved it and wanted more!! ???
Boke lol :-X
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I tie my hair back when going down on them simples! ;D
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The other day I let a client who was really keen on putting his cock in my ass, put just the end in...After he took it out I could faintly smell poo on the condom :( As I generally don't do anal sex with clients I found it a bit off putting, he loved it and wanted more!! ???
If you're doing anal, there's going to be some odour of poo. Not on the outside of your arsehole, but physically your anus is a tube from your bowel, so if your body is working correctly then you're going to get that smell!
I don't do anal with clients but my ex was fucking my arse one morning and afterwards a tiny bit of poo came out as he withdrew. It was like the size of a rabbit dropping but he was SO SHOCKED. I initially laughed it off but his reaction made it so awkward. ::)
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That's why I won't be going down on their ass. I can just about tolerate giving a BJ.
I take a full shower after I poo because I don't want to be disgusted at myself.
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I'm a major prude when it comes to pooh's and farting, that's why I get so shocked when I get requests for anything to do with poohing or farting because girls don't pooh or fart and it's as simple as that :)
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Coming up a close second is stale pissy pubes :o There's no getting away from the fact that anyone with that unmistakeable smell hasn't showered for at least half a day...
That is gross, that smell makes me gag, also my shower is always full of black fluff and black bits after they've been in there, what is it?
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That is gross, that smell makes me gag, also my shower is always full of black fluff and black bits after they've been in there, what is it?
Sock fluff! I have cream carpets in the bedrooms and it gets everywhere x
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If they have a smelly bum even after a shower I just position myself so that my nose is not near their bum, so no 69 position I will be on top on them between their legs looking up at them. I can cope with that as they usually concentrate on cleaning the cheese from under their cocks so that bits clean.
It's the skid marks they leave on the bed that get to me. 3 times in one day the other week. Tramps!
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Sock fluff! I have cream carpets in the bedrooms and it gets everywhere x
Is it, I spend ages getting rid of this when they've left, drives me mad x
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I did laugh when I read this title.
Pro Tip
1. tie hair in bun
2. stand them against the wall
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I don't do anal with clients but my ex was fucking my arse one morning and afterwards a tiny bit of poo came out as he withdrew. It was like the size of a rabbit dropping but he was SO SHOCKED. I initially laughed it off but his reaction made it so awkward. ::)
I'm not surprised he's your ex, what did he think was up there fresh flowers! ::)
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Is it, I spend ages getting rid of this when they've left, drives me mad x
They think they're being polite taking their socks off but I prefer it when they keep them on, save this mess ;D
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I totally relate to this!!! I remember one guy I had a couple of years ago was sweaty and majorly stinky, although particularly in the nether regions, generally all over... It was so bad I felt sick... I pretended I had the sudden onset of a bug, returned his money and got him to leave. It states clearly on my aw profile that clients need to be clean and fresh... He'd been to work! And more recently I saw a taxi driver who had booked in advance so should have checked but he had major cock cheese, having requested food play, I was able to camouflage it... Still can't look at a can of squirty cream as not feel a tad queasy!!! He also had a stinky arse which I was able to avoid as I don't do that and he was aware... Thank god!! After he ha left I found skid marks on the bedding.... YUCK!!! 😷😷😷
I always jump in the shower between client and do every single bit as I OCD like that... I just would like clients to be as clean as they can.... Most of my clients are great and I understand that they're popping out in lunch hour or whatever but the above 2 were awful!!! Lol... Still I do love the job... Most of the time!
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I'm not surprised he's your ex, what did he think was up there fresh flowers! ::)
Raspberry's x
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I totally relate to this!!! I remember one guy I had a couple of years ago was sweaty and majorly stinky, although particularly in the nether regions, generally all over... It was so bad I felt sick... I pretended I had the sudden onset of a bug, returned his money and got him to leave. It states clearly on my aw profile that clients need to be clean and fresh... He'd been to work! And more recently I saw a taxi driver who had booked in advance so should have checked but he had major cock cheese, having requested food play, I was able to camouflage it... Still can't look at a can of squirty cream as not feel a tad queasy!!! He also had a stinky arse which I was able to avoid as I don't do that and he was aware... Thank god!! After he ha left I found skid marks on the bedding.... YUCK!!! 😷😷😷
I always jump in the shower between client and do every single bit as I OCD like that... I just would like clients to be as clean as they can.... Most of my clients are great and I understand that they're popping out in lunch hour or whatever but the above 2 were awful!!! Lol... Still I do love the job... Most of the time!
This is why I have it on my profile that EVERYONE must shower when they arrive if they expect OWO which is me saying in other words....make sure your cock is clean for me OR ELSE 👊🏼
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I *heart* the title of this thread!!! :D ;D
Could be the title of a bestseller lol ;D ;)
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Decant some intimate wash and label it willy/bum wash and leave them in the shower and by the sink in the bathroom
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Decant some intimate wash and label it willy/bum wash and leave them in the shower and by the sink in the bathroom
You can lead a horse to water but you can't make it drink ...
Thinking about this I never experienced this strange phenomena in my private life, and to be fair a lot of clients don't have smelly sweaty asses and are nice and clean. It mostly seems to be the ones who want some sort of anal play on them, maybe they not bothering to wash their asses as like some sort of protest...who knows!?!
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You can lead a horse to water but you can't make it drink ...
Thinking about this I never experienced this strange phenomena in my private life, and to be fair a lot of clients don't have smelly sweaty asses and are nice and clean. It mostly seems to be the ones who want some sort of anal play on them, maybe they not bothering to wash their asses as like some sort of protest...who knows!?!
I've never experienced sweaty arses, cock cheese or bad hygiene in my personal life either but thankfully the vast majority of our clients are clean and have enough respect for themselves and for us to be clean. Most of them have figured that we're gonna be much more enthusiastic in the bedroom with them if they are clean.
I had a client recently who I had to refuse pretty much all services after he got out the shower where I lay beside him with my arms by my side as stiff as a board. It was only when he questioned services I had listed on my profile not being available to him that I point blank told him that his hygiene was horrendous. He's since tried to see me again on the promise he would be cleaner but I don't know how it's possible, he was filthy. I had to strip ALL bedding including cushion covers after he left whereas normally I just change the throw over after each client and do the rest at the end of the nite. Had to open all windows and fumigate my entire flat. Revolting!!
xx
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I'm so glad I don't really get smelly guys, I do sometimes notice tho a strong fishy smell on their dick
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You can lead a horse to water but you can't make it drink ...
Thinking about this I never experienced this strange phenomena in my private life, and to be fair a lot of clients don't have smelly sweaty asses and are nice and clean. It mostly seems to be the ones who want some sort of anal play on them, maybe they not bothering to wash their asses as like some sort of protest...who knows!?!
I mainly notice this also on guys who go in for alot of bum play..I think sometimes they have had or enjoy a bit too much bum play and they can wind up having anal leakage..seen it too many times from the 'dildo up my arse' brigade!
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I mainly notice this also on guys who go in for alot of bum play..I think sometimes they have had or enjoy a bit too much bum play and they can wind up having anal leakage..seen it too many times from the 'dildo up my arse' brigade!
My strapon/fisting clients are usually spotless in their douching pre booking, I find its the guys new to strapon that don't bother to douche properly and when I ask if they are clean for anal they say 'well I've had a shower'
The worst I had was a guy that literally shit on my dungeon floor during a strapon session, I went fucking mental and made him clean it up then leave
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My strapon/fisting clients are usually spotless in their douching pre booking, I find its the guys new to strapon that don't bother to douche properly and when I ask if they are clean for anal they say 'well I've had a shower'
The worst I had was a guy that literally shit on my dungeon floor during a strapon session, I went fucking mental and made him clean it up then leave
They will of seen it in porn and just assumed there's no prep work you need to do to be clean before any Anal play.
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They will of seen it in porn and just assumed there's no prep work you need to do to be clean before any Anal play.
Bloody porn! :FF
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The worst I had was a guy that literally shit on my dungeon floor during a strapon session, I went fucking mental and made him clean it up then leave
I would have loved to have that. Bet he died with embarrassment lol
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I would have loved to have that. Bet he died with embarrassment lol
He was mortified but I had no sympathy, he should have douched,
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This thread has really made me laugh.
I don't do rimming. I have done it now n then but only for the odd client I really fancy who I know is usually very clean. Even so I have noticed my hair stinks of arse afterwards so tie it back.
Sweaty cock, balls n bums and pits are really hell to work with. Makes me actually gag. I've had cheesy cock, pissy cock, skiddy bumholes on my throw, reeking pits, the lot! The worst is when the throw has to be put straight into the wash immediately after the stinking clients left, windows thrown wide open, febreeze sprayed everywhere and even 15mins later the room is still stinking!
I'm very clean myself. Always wash n soap up between bookings and after the toilet too. Always do enemas before I start a day of bookings. And always check and recheck my breath and use mouthwash and rewash pits if I'm feeling a bit sweaty. I'd be mortified to be remotely smelly in any orifice. I wish punters paid as much attention to their own personal hygiene and think about washing properly after using the toilet or if they smell. A shower that morning or a splash of water using no soap just won't cut it. I've also noticed that black men smell very musky below, it's not a vile odour, just musky. White men don't have that scent. Has anyone else noticed that?
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This thread has really made me laugh.
I don't do rimming. I have done it now n then but only for the odd client I really fancy who I know is usually very clean. Even so I have noticed my hair stinks of arse afterwards so tie it back.
Sweaty cock, balls n bums and pits are really hell to work with. Makes me actually gag. I've had cheesy cock, pissy cock, skiddy bumholes on my throw, reeking pits, the lot! The worst is when the throw has to be put straight into the wash immediately after the stinking clients left, windows thrown wide open, febreeze sprayed everywhere and even 15mins later the room is still stinking!
I'm very clean myself. Always wash n soap up between bookings and after the toilet too. Always do enemas before I start a day of bookings. And always check and recheck my breath and use mouthwash and rewash pits if I'm feeling a bit sweaty. I'd be mortified to be remotely smelly in any orifice. I wish punters paid as much attention to their own personal hygiene and think about washing properly after using the toilet or if they smell. A shower that morning or a splash of water using no soap just won't cut it. I've also noticed that black men smell very musky below, it's not a vile odour, just musky. White men don't have that scent. Has anyone else noticed that?
I've never noticed that, I do find Asian men to be the cleanest, if I ever have problems you can bet it's a doughy white man in his 50s who smells like an old bus station toilet and has that cold clammy skin
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Mmmmmmm I think it's ok talking about bad hygiene in a generalisation with people but not so ok talking about bad hygiene with certain races.
I find all races stink to fuck if they don't wash, simple as that really.
xx
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I didn't say certain races stink. I said I've noticed black men have a musky odour. Musky isn't stinky.
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I didn't say certain races stink. I said I've noticed black men have a musky odour. Musky isn't stinky.
It is in my book :P x
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How someone else smells to you is linked to genetics - the major histocompatibility complex. Someone of a different race will smell different to you than to someone of their own race. Hence, Afro-Caribbeans may be 'muskier' to Caucasians - and vice versa. Fundamentally, it's to stop us procreating with someone who is too closely related and thus produce unhealthly offspring.
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How someone else smells to you is linked to genetics - the major histocompatibility complex. Someone of a different race will smell different to you than to someone of their own race. Hence, Afro-Caribbeans may be 'muskier' to Caucasians - and vice versa. Fundamentally, it's to stop us procreating with someone who is too closely related and thus produce unhealthly offspring.
Yeah I've heard a few times that white people smell of milky stuff 😳
As long as it's not sour milk, I think it could be worse lol.
xx
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I think the milk reference comes from diet - I've heard the same thing said by natives of countries where they don't eat dairy (and yes, it was sour milk :-X). In my experience diet affects the way individual people smell far more than anything else bar obvious things like smoking and drinking alcohol.
Either way I think we'll move on the from the sweeping generalisations about how all people who are X smell like Y. It's not helpful, and nor is it pleasant to read.
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I think the milk reference comes from diet - I've heard the same thing said by natives of countries where they don't eat dairy (and yes, it was sour milk :-X). In my experience diet affects the way individual people smell far more than anything else bar obvious things like smoking and drinking alcohol.
Either way I think we'll move on the from the sweeping generalisations about how all people who are X smell like Y. It's not helpful, and nor is it pleasant to read.
There's certain food I try to avoid such as garlic, love the stuff but it stinks and I think asparagus makes you taste stale so I don't eat that either but I do really like it.
And....Agreed :-*
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I can't cope with eau des Onions, I even have in my etiquette section. I always make sure my arse crack smells of soap.
Had a client yesterday with Onion breath, even after using mouthwash. Could always trickle some down their crack & see if that helps. Amazing how some still stink after getting out of the shower.
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My strapon/fisting clients are usually spotless in their douching pre booking, I find its the guys new to strapon that don't bother to douche properly and when I ask if they are clean for anal they say 'well I've had a shower'
Yes I find the ones who have had strap on or fisting done on them to be clean but...there is still that ass smell. I decided to give up fisting after one particular client brought a big suitcase full of his own toys and they were all dripping with this fake cum stuff he had bought online, it was repulsive :o The last time I saw him I used the speculum he had brought to wee in his ass...I remember thinking what the fuck am I doing ??? It was vile.