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Author Topic: Reasons not to be an escort  (Read 136137 times)

amy

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Re: Reasons not to be an escort
« Reply #90 on: 03 December 2017, 06:22:09 pm »
I agree.  Re-reading the original post (OP), I realise how true that is.  The OP appears to be a very young woman (who used to work as the full-time escort?), likely highly intelligent and extremely aware, she probably had a lot to lose as a young woman, who was yet to experience what her life, as an intelligent young woman, had to offer e.g. falling in love, have beautiful children, having a stable family life (and all that ideal fantasy/reality young women naturally strive to have) etc.  I'm assuming that she had the negative perception towards escorting at the time when the post was written (and possibly moved on).

No, it was written because the OP was a site admin at the time of posting (now well over seven years ago) and we thought it would be a useful topic to have as a Sticky thread. Of all the regular posters we've ever had whether forum staff or not, the OP would have the least negative perception of any I can think of and even if she didn't, speculating about other people's possible reasons for posting anything is not the purpose of this or any other thread so we're not going to do it :).

Schwiftysquancher91

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Re: Reasons not to be an escort
« Reply #91 on: 04 December 2017, 08:20:21 am »
I've recently needed to replenish savings and I only work four days a week. If you find yourself coming into this work purely to save for something in your future, you will find yourself wanting to push yourself to work every hour you have free. There is a real chance of burning out and over tiring yourself, even if you are enjoying yourself and your work the time. It can also lead to pressuring yourself to accept another booking when really it's time to put your feet up and relax.
'I don't know, its like there's a light at the end of the tunnel'
'That's hellfire, Dean'

sweetmilf

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Re: Reasons not to be an escort
« Reply #92 on: 04 December 2017, 08:42:59 am »
No, I just wondered if this author was at the "crossroad" when she wrote it, but You are right.  I was reading into it and reflecting my own feelings.  I try not to think about it, especially in gloomy December.  ::)

LondonNatalie

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Re: Reasons not to be an escort
« Reply #93 on: 06 December 2017, 04:18:44 pm »
Personally, I think the worst aspect for me is the sporadic income. I've just recently went full time and am really struggling.

Lying to everyone about where I work is also a lot of effort. Got to try and remember all the fake co-worker names, and come up with some things that happened at work, etc.

Hanging around waiting for the phone to ring is a pretty annoying feeling.

I also find that it can take away from your regular sex life. One in that you just don't have the time. I used to have quite a bit of casual sex but now don't really want to see someone in case I get a booking. For me as well I don't want to ruin the things I actually really enjoy irl, I'm into dominating and don't do it professionally (though I'd probably earn a lot more money if I did) as it ruins my enjoyment of it to do it with guys I don't find attractive.

Lushblossom

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Re: Reasons not to be an escort
« Reply #94 on: 12 December 2017, 06:09:24 am »
Yes the lack of a secure income is a definite disadvantage.

It is hard to make plans based on variable income.

QueenB

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Re: Reasons not to be an escort
« Reply #95 on: 19 December 2017, 11:56:14 am »
I have been an independent escort now for 4 years. Its been a rollercoaster ride of highs and lows. Some days I find it hard to motivate myself but that could be down to hormones? I have made a substantial amount of money and spent a substantial amount of money.

My advice is to set yourself a goal of how long you want to escort for
Always have funds saved for at least a months worth of outgoings for those weeks you cant work due to illness, periods and just a quiet time
Play safe at all times to maintain good health
Save as much as you can
Use your spare time to study for a qualification (At least if there is a gap in your CV you can say you have been studying)
Make friends with other escorts so you have someone to talk to
Get a part time job so you keep yourself grounded and not stuck in doors everyday as that will drive you mad

QueenB

newlook5

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Re: Reasons not to be an escort
« Reply #96 on: 31 December 2017, 12:02:58 am »
Despite what some people think, working as a prostitute can have a lot of positive points which we could all tell you about, but if you're thinking about it you've probably already come up with enough of your own. However, it's not a job for everyone and you might not have thought about some of the drawbacks.

Stigma

Ok this one's fairly obvious, but really think about it. It's easy, especially if you're young, to not think about how this could affect you. There are stories of people being anonymously outed at their other jobs even though they didn't show their faces on their websites and tabloids sometimes get in on the act too. Once you put some photos on the internet they never really go away, and even if you don't, with mobile phone cameras, discrete webcams built into computers, and even inexpensive spycams, you can never be sure there's no evidence around.

More personally, even when stop being an prostitute it will be part of your history. Are you going to be able to tell people close to you, or will you have to keep it a secret?

danger

This is another obvious one, but by being an escort you'll be putting yourself in situations which could be dangerous. We have ways to reduce this risk but it will always be present.

isolating

It can be lonely being an escort, especially if you don't feel able to tell the people around you. You'll have to lie to them which puts a strain on the relationship at your end and some people withdraw from their friends and family to spare themselves the stress of leading a double life. Even if you do tell people you know, they won't be able to relate to a lot of your experiences. Escorts, even those who work for an agency, rarely come into contact with each other if they don't make an effort to do so, so there aren't many opportunities to chat and unwind with people who know what you're talking about.

variable income

You've had a whole week without any work, and the week before was quiet. Are you feeling stressed? Rejected? Frustrated? Did you save enough money from that good week last month, or are you struggling to make ends meet?

You never know how much money you'll make in any day, week or month, but you still need to budget and manage your time. If you're the sort of person who spends whatever money you have, you're likely to get into financial trouble. If you just hate waiting for something to happen it can drive you crazy.

The unpredictability can also make it difficult to maintain a good work/life balance. If you know that a lull could hit at any time, will you be able to turn down a job because you've arranged to do something for your friends, family, or yourself?

no security

Not only could things get quiet at any time, but there's no sick pay or holiday pay. If you can't work because of illness or injury, or you just need a break, you're the one who has to provide for that. If you don't save up enough to live for at least a few weeks (I recommend three months), a little bad luck could really mess with your life.

people trying to take advantage of you

People regularly try to get what they want from us (money and/or sex, usually) on their own terms, and especially with new escorts. This includes offering you services for money or sex, offering to help you run your business in ways that would be simple to do yourself, trying to convince you to do things the way they want by claiming that everyone does it that way, and trying to either rip you off or get a service you don't offer once you're at a booking. You need to be able to spot them and in some cases be very sure of yourself in order to stand your ground.

relationships

Prostitution can be harmful to your relationships, including those with friends and family as described above, and especially romantic ones. If you keep your job a secret you'll have to lie to your partner regularly and they can never really know you. If you tell them then even if they accept it initially they often become unhappy with the idea as time goes on and trust breaks down. If they can cope most of the time it's still likely to be used against you in arguments.

If you go the disclosure route dating becomes more of a minefield than usual, as people may be attracted to your job rather than you; thinking that they can benefit from your income or that you'll be will to have sex all the time in ways they don't think they could normally get away with.

There are a few special people who can accept your job and treat you like a normal girlfriend or boyfriend, but even that isn't a perfect solution for some escorts, who can't cope with being with someone so non possessive.

Even after you stop working there can still be issues. You still need to choose whether to admit or hide that part of your past and deal with the consequences of either, and some people see men differently after having a lot of them as clients, which can be a problem if you want a boyfriend.

trouble getting out

Most people don't go into prostitution expecting to do it for the rest of their working lives, but once you're in it can be hard to get out. The money, free time and freedom can be addictive, so many former escorts slip back into it after trying to cope with being told what to do for 40 hours a week and earning less than they could in 10. If you're not studying or doing a day job, you'll have a hole in your CV which is difficult to explain and becomes more problematic the longer you escort.

Sex drive dies

I used to love sex... and having my clit licked...how that has changed

Uncertain income
Not being able to know that you have a steady income...if you get sick you wont be able to work

Guy pretending to like you so they can have free sex

Timewasters...pranks calls..
if you were doing this you would not have to deal with this sh1t
« Last Edit: 31 January 2018, 09:19:58 pm by newlook5 »

newlook5

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Re: Reasons not to be an escort
« Reply #97 on: 31 January 2018, 09:13:22 pm »
I never really treat the job as a "job". Before I started to do this professionally, I very often had sex with a lots of man, without having them pay for it. I found this work as a very good option for me, it's fun and I often like it. I really learn a lot during the time I spent with the clients. About their needs, about the life of the clients, their problems and many things like that. I like this job. I am so young and I feel much older inside. Like much older... More mature.

In this job you become smarter/wiser quicker. You're interacting with so many different types of people and we put ourselves in potentially dangerous situations

Lotus300

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Re: Reasons not to be an escort
« Reply #98 on: 26 March 2018, 04:14:57 pm »
As I often say, escort work is like the job of a spy:

exciting, addictive, financially rewarding but also stressful, secretive and dangerous... and we all hope to never end up as Sergei Skripal.

Reason number one for not being an escort?
If you are not a James Bond female version, do not do this job, it is not for you. ;)
"Only good girls keep diaries. Bad girls don't have time." Tallulah Bankhead

DarcyLady

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Re: Reasons not to be an escort
« Reply #99 on: 01 April 2018, 02:25:57 pm »
So I have a crazy case of the flu right now, and I've been in bed since Wednesday. I've had to turn down 3 jobs a day :FF Wish we got sick pay! Goddammit!

Meetingdiversity

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Re: Reasons not to be an escort
« Reply #100 on: 23 April 2018, 02:56:44 pm »
Because you don't realise how good you had it until you escort.  Even though I am very close to finishing the odd escorting. It has taught me a sweet lesson. That is to escort if you want to be disrespected, because there is alot of it about.

When you get others noticing your changes in the civy life, that is an accomplishment within itself.

No client really respects an escort.

Guiltypleasure

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Re: Reasons not to be an escort
« Reply #101 on: 08 June 2018, 03:14:46 pm »


I agree some men don't respect us but..

 I have some guys who totally understand and respect it , not all no but some definitely , they ask "how's business" in the same capacity that they talk about their own and the current financial climate.


Crixus X

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Re: Reasons not to be an escort
« Reply #102 on: 09 June 2018, 08:50:43 pm »
My GF accidentally gave my work number to her parents and her curious dad google searched it and they found my escort profies OMG.
Now they are always checking my twitter which is so embarrassing ..

Cgiw

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Re: Reasons not to be an escort
« Reply #103 on: 05 August 2018, 09:38:27 am »
I've recently needed to replenish savings and I only work four days a week. If you find yourself coming into this work purely to save for something in your future, you will find yourself wanting to push yourself to work every hour you have free. There is a real chance of burning out and over tiring yourself, even if you are enjoying yourself and your work the time. It can also lead to pressuring yourself to accept another booking when really it's time to put your feet up and relax.

This is absolutely spot on. I'm saying yes to everything to meet my savings targets and I've realised I need to stop. Say no. Be unavailable. Make time for myself.

MisssophieH

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Re: Reasons not to be an escort
« Reply #104 on: 11 September 2018, 10:39:16 am »
Surely if you're paying tax there won't be a gap in your CV ? I've said I'm a massage therapist on my tax returns