*Sits back with a bowl of popcorn*

Er, well, I don't want to disrupt anyone's anticipation of a good old fight or anything, but as far as I can see, all that's happened here is the statement of opposing opinions.

I agree with Amy, NOT because of being in some sort of "mod club" (honestly, my only job round here is to get rid of thread-titles in capslock and to fix broken quotes, really) but because I don't think "being old" makes a bad client. And I don't think that's what the OP was necessarily getting at, either - and if a client is rude, or haggles/underpays, I've got no more respect for him than he has for sex workers.

But somewhere along the way, this thread got a little ugly. Perhaps it was here?

*Dry heaves*

...but anyway, nobody is repressing anybody else's rights to an opinion, though that doesn't mean people aren't allowed to post in disagreement, too. Mods will only lock threads if they degenerate into pointless insults and personal comments.

I personally think this thread is fine so far - quite a rousing discussion of personal preferences, shocking experiences and general mores, so hopefully, with a little less dry-heaving, it can stay as it is!

I am not complaining about 80yr per se, just that he should have told me so I knew what to expect.

And I think we're all definitely agreeing that a shock like that is a horrid thing to do to anyone, and he should DEFINITELY have given you a fully informative warning!

I was surprised once by a client in this 60s who'd beaten prostate cancer, which was amazing, but getting a quick lecture about how he was going to have to take medication and inject himself with something before he could have sex was a bit of a bloody shock when I got there, I tell you. If I'd known in advance, I would have passed on the booking because I would have known how uncomfortable I would feel, and it would be better for him to look for a WG with related experience - there are plenty of women out there who've had partners with various issues, and who therefore would understand the medication/injection bit and not find it scary like I did.

There's obviously no need for a person with issues like this to be warning everyone in their lives all the time, but if they expect a very young, inexperienced woman to have full sexual intercourse with them, then they bloody well do need to give a warning, in my opinion.

And just to balance it out, I have a brilliant regular who must be around 70 and he's great cos he's simple, direct and really enjoys himself, so I really enjoy seeing him, too. He might be my longest-known client, actually!

a fairly innocent thread with a little  humour

Exactly.  My OP, whilst a bit cheeky (tongue-in-cheeky?!) was merely bemoaning some of the not-so palatable parts of our chosen careers.

If a mod wishes to express her disgust opinion on something being discussed by others, she needs to phrase things a little different than how she just did it to avoid upsets. Infact, it was fine until the last line. Up until the last line it was just a regular post. But ending it with
 

Quote

I'm appalled by the tone of this thread. Poor show

Oooh. Okay. Are we all on punishment now? No tv and phone for a week. I think most of us have nothing but repect for the mods and this forum  and therefore we dont go around trying to piss everyone off on here. So when mum a mod kind of tells us off a little for something so small then its a little odd. And worrying.

Therein lies the problem.  Mods on any forum, whilst obviously having the same right to comment and express opinions as any other member, surely have to ensure that they don't drift into the realms of censorship.  There is a world of difference in saying, eg: 'I don't agree at all, I have some lovely 70/80+ clients' and, eg: 'I am appalled by the opinions conveyed.  Poor show.'

Sorry to harp on, but just to be clear:

I don't begrudge anyone the right to disagree with me.

Nor do I, as I clearly state.  There is, however, a distinct difference between disagreement and disapproval.

Quote from: AngelaManchester on 06 August 2011, 02:25:46 pm

Nor do I, as I clearly state.  There is, however, a distinct difference between disagreement and disapproval.

Really?

Sorry for butting in but I think it's all about connotations, for me "disagreeing" sounds like something equals do, "disapproving" sounds like something superiors do.

I wish I got a penny every time someone got upset about being disagreed with and decided that they wanted to be banned so they could make a dramatic exit.

I'm not upset or trying to make a dramatic exit!    See! Thats a genuine big smile! I'd quite like to stay!  I just think its a shame that its turned into a bit of a soap here! Lets all chill the fudge out and start talking about cute little squirrels or something! 

Here's something a bit different:

http://xkcd.com/685/

 

I am seriously thinking of banning clients who are old enough to be my grandfather.

I had one yesterday who asked, midway through, whether I could give him more time (but, sorry, he didn't have any more money on him).  I was like   'Ooh yes, because I just like sucking your 80-year-old willy so much that I'll do it for free'.  He went for a pee mid-punt   leaving the bathroom door open whilst he did so, faffed around at the end of the appointment, took about a million years to get dressed then asked as he was leaving if he could have a discount next time  

I've just got rid of another one who, when he arrived, asked me for a cup of coffee 'because I always have a cup of coffee at 11'.  Fine, creature of habit, if you want to pay me for making you coffee, no problemo.  But he had it strong and black - have you ever smelt someone's breath after they've been drinking strong black coffee??!  Then he proceeded to 'kiss' me, which to him meant shoving his MASSIVE tongue in my mouth and slobbering all over me.  Then - and this is making me feel queasy - LICKED me non-stop for the hour.  I don't mean just oral, I mean licked my face, neck, boobs, arms and even at one point - when I sat up to reach for a condom - started licking my BACK.  Using the whole length of his tongue to give me big long sloppy licks all over.  Feel sick    Just scrubbed and scrubbed in the shower.  Best of it was, when I asked him for the money at the beginning of the appointment, he said - only half jokily - 'Do I have to pay?'

Sorry for the moan, just had to vent.  In both cases, I was lying there looking at their little spindly legs and walnut whip willies and just thinking 'I deserve more than what I've charged you for this.'

Oh Angela.
That is so horrible and I so empathise.
I just wish people who think we earn easy money
read your post as it's a perfect example of why the job is often anything but.

I have yummy clients, and so-so clients and I have clients who I just don't gel with.
When they french-kiss it is just so yucky, for me that is the worst bit of all.
The non-gelling ones are the jobs I end up closing up on myself, afterwards
always by having a long hot shower. My man is lovely and know not to make conversation with me
when my body language says I'm in that yucky place.

This is a job and we should be able to be professional and divorce ourselves from our emotions.
But the truth is that what we do, is so intimate, that separation can at times be so difficult or even impossible.
We are humans with feelings and after all, none of our clients want a hard assed bitch!
But along with our sensitivity comes our exposure to things, to people
where it just feels soooooo wrong.
And that is just the way it is. Yes we are all fluffy and lovable. But the flip side of this is vulnerability.
And our mental well-being has to take priority.

Sometimes in the gross-out sessions (for me those are few and far between) I find the time drags
and I just think to myself
"Oh god this is so wrong, please let it be over"
It really feels like a bad time at the dentist!
But of course, we have to go there every six months too!
I find that walking out of their place with a bundle of twenties helps put my feelings into perspective.

It is good to have a confidant be they an understanding partner, a close friend
or your internet friends, right here on SAAFE!

The nice thing about being our own boss is that we can pick and choose who we have sex with for money.
We can always change our mind at any point. Even when we are about to get down and dirty, so to speak.
Just say sorry, look apologetic and hand them the money back.
But be mindful of their feelings too. Its not their fault they gross us out unless it's BO 
Let them down as gently as possible.
I'm sure the others will have suggestions on tactful things to say to a client,
when killing an appointment.

Anyway, lots of hugs from me
I know exactly what you mean.

Jodie. xx