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Author Topic: No Interest From Civvy Men  (Read 6504 times)

Gypsy

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No Interest From Civvy Men
« on: 10 September 2021, 08:52:43 am »
I know this may sound ridiculous given the job we do, but does anyone else feel like civvy men aren't interested in them at all?

I get loads of compliments from my clients about how gorgeous and pretty I am and such a nice person, too. These compliments are from my regulars mostly, but when I see someone one off sometimes they'll make a comment as well.

But in normal every day life I get zero interest. Nothing, nada.

I am not open about the job, so I could understand it if I was how it puts people off.

I just think it's odd how men who are paying can be so nice and complimentary, but I may as well just be invisible outside of work.

This has been the same for years. No matter where I go or what I do, no one shows an interest. It's like I'm sending out vibes that repulse men.

Anyone else like this?
These days there are no Prince Charmings. A girl just has to be her own hero

Mirror

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Re: No Interest From Civvy Men
« Reply #1 on: 10 September 2021, 09:56:14 am »
I know this may sound ridiculous given the job we do, but does anyone else feel like civvy men aren't interested in them at all?

I get loads of compliments from my clients about how gorgeous and pretty I am and such a nice person, too. These compliments are from my regulars mostly, but when I see someone one off sometimes they'll make a comment as well.

But in normal every day life I get zero interest. Nothing, nada.

I am not open about the job, so I could understand it if I was how it puts people off.

I just think it's odd how men who are paying can be so nice and complimentary, but I may as well just be invisible outside of work.

This has been the same for years. No matter where I go or what I do, no one shows an interest. It's like I'm sending out vibes that repulse men.

Anyone else like this?

No I would think it strange if men in other areas of my life gave me compliments at the same rate as clients. Although I do not think I am invisible I actually like not being noticed (but I do not think I am not noticed), just going about my other activities freely. In some situations it would be totally inappropriate. For example yesterday I went to the gym, bought some flowers, had a physical therapist appointment - if guys had complimented me on my looks in any of those situations it would have just been really odd and in once case totally unprofessional.

Also clients/punters are in a very intimate situation in which it is appropriate to compliment, even if just for conversation, also appreciation and of course they may have chosen women they are particularly attracted to.

Tickle

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Re: No Interest From Civvy Men
« Reply #2 on: 10 September 2021, 09:57:01 am »
Big topic. I've found clients can be a lot nicer than men I've come across when getting official stuff done. There may be a lot of reasons for it none of which are personal. I find a lot of feedback is indirect. Like, their attitude or whether they remember you or whether they go the extra yard.

I usually wear something MILFy but sometimes I will roadtest something more explicit. I've been hit on multiple times by the black guys hanging around the local shop or when picking up a takeaway or dropping by the 24/7 on a Friday night. I wasn't even in one takeaway for two minutes and was chatting with one of the staff who asked for my number. I wasn't sure if he'd seen my profile or if he just fancied me. He went quiet and starting playing with his phone and wouldn't look me in the eye after. One evening I wore a low tight satin top, rah rah skirt, and fishnets and one guy in the 24/7 queue looked at me then glanced between my legs and nearly dropped his stuff so yeah I guess this was a reaction.

The only verbal compliments I've got are from women. I got one drive-by compliment of "Looking glamorous" in the main shopping centre. Oh, and I've had one woman in front of me in the queue say this as well as some random guy in the local shop but otherwise nothing. Mind you Bristol is dress down city so if you amp it up even a little bit you're going to stand out.

I've had cars stop to let me cross the road when I've been wearing something fairly posh like a posh jacket with long skirt and boots.

As much as there are days when I want to scream for feeling invisble on the plus side I rarerly get any hassle.

amy

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Re: No Interest From Civvy Men
« Reply #3 on: 10 September 2021, 10:04:05 am »
I'm trying to find a sex work context here, but it's not easy?

The majority of men, punter or not-punter aren't interested in you (or me, or the lady at the next table). just as we aren't interested in them. The punters who book are interested enough that they're prepared to pay just to be in the same room, so I daresay that can skew our opinions at bit :).
« Last Edit: 10 September 2021, 10:06:19 am by amy »

Femme fatale

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Re: No Interest From Civvy Men
« Reply #4 on: 10 September 2021, 10:08:04 am »
I really stopped caring what civvy guys said and thought due to my issues around relationships and men in general
Clients give nice compliments and pay which is more of a priority to me that they like what they see.
I attracted the wrong kind of guys before hand anyway there is something about me I guess

thickthighs

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Re: No Interest From Civvy Men
« Reply #5 on: 10 September 2021, 10:25:16 am »
not that I'm bothered as in a relationship but prior to
that it was probably because outside of work I look a bag of shit lol dressed down, no make up, hair scraped up, so far removed from my work look.

HiddenTalents02

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Re: No Interest From Civvy Men
« Reply #6 on: 10 September 2021, 10:28:56 am »
I mean when we are doing meets, it’s a completely different setting. We’re being intimate and whatnot and it’s pretty normal to do compliments..I’d find it a little odd/annoying (for me personally) if strange men just started giving me compliments during my everyday activities. Different if on a date with a civvy man.

Gypsy

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Re: No Interest From Civvy Men
« Reply #7 on: 10 September 2021, 11:02:58 am »
I really stopped caring what civvy guys said and thought due to my issues around relationships and men in general
Clients give nice compliments and pay which is more of a priority to me that they like what they see.
I attracted the wrong kind of guys before hand anyway there is something about me I guess

 :)

I wasn't honing in on the compliments as such, but my point was I never get asked out or such or even remotely shown an interest in.
People meet people they go on to have relationships with all the time, but I never seem to  ???
These days there are no Prince Charmings. A girl just has to be her own hero

English Green

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Re: No Interest From Civvy Men
« Reply #8 on: 10 September 2021, 12:09:40 pm »
I think the difference is you are not alone in a room with many civvy men for any to ask you out or pay you compliments. Not all men are bold to approach a woman now days in a supermarket/restaurant/pub. A lot will get there fixes or meetings from paid sex or dating sites.

That is probably why some sex workers end up dating clients as its how they meet the opposite sex mostly and it can be convenient.

Escortx

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Re: No Interest From Civvy Men
« Reply #9 on: 10 September 2021, 03:02:22 pm »
Not really I’m pretty fat and don’t dress up or wear make up when I’m not work 90% of the time.

Jadine

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Re: No Interest From Civvy Men
« Reply #10 on: 10 September 2021, 08:56:59 pm »
The only interest I get is the most ugliest looking  men looking at me , I had some old guy probably in his 70’s the other day started talking to me asking if I meet him lol , both his eyes cataracts in at that age really must think his still in his youth   :-[

Maz

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Re: No Interest From Civvy Men
« Reply #11 on: 10 September 2021, 11:54:51 pm »
I feel this way. I get a tiny bit of attention from civvy men, (maybe a look or whistle) but not much. It's punters that seem to have nicer things to say.

Some civvy men are even that moronic that they turn their heads away when I pass them  ::)women too at times

Blackcat77

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Re: No Interest From Civvy Men
« Reply #12 on: 11 September 2021, 01:23:06 am »
That is true for me too, men outside of work only and have only been interested in sleeping with me, even before I was an escort, I was never the girl who boyfriends, just the one with one night stands, so I charging money and I'm not interested in "normal" men at all they still want the same thing, I get fwb offers all the time no male friends and no "normal" friends, it's different with clients, because they chose you, to spend time with whether your showing face or not they chose you out of thousands of girls, so they do like what they see.

pussycat

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Re: No Interest From Civvy Men
« Reply #13 on: 11 September 2021, 02:25:55 am »
Since doing this job I have become much more confident and this definitely shows. Not in an arrogant way, just I don’t have the same insecurities I had before. Many men are intimidated by confident women. Since being an escort I’ve too found that I receive less interest in general from civvie men. They used to seem to prefer it when I was perhaps a bit more needy and emotionally vulnerable. Now when dating I make it clear they need to add to my life to make it worth my while pursuing anything with them. This isn’t always done explicitly so, but they are aware of it and most bugger off when they realise they can’t add anything. Any time spent dating is time away from my cats, and they’re a tough crowd to compete with. I’ve even turned down paying men when the money hasn’t been tempting enough to lure me away from kitty cuddles  :D

Nadya

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Re: No Interest From Civvy Men
« Reply #14 on: 11 September 2021, 10:58:29 am »
What I have noticed, and done, at least since starting this work is prioritising emotional connections.  That has 100% weeded out all the fuckboys/men.  Horny 40-somethings who are after my body who might drag a connection out because they expect a shag. even after they realise they don't want a relationship.

I had one guy the other day, desperately tried to get me to 'go home' with him after the date, he was drunk and I expected the shag to be crap, I put him on the nightbus alone.    He tried again the next day, he took the day off and told him no, I think because he knew that I wasn't working that day that he could get me to come over.  After that his demeanour changed and he got negative.  So they select themselves out.  Once upon a time I would have had sex just because I felt horny but then still feel a bit bad about myself because the guy would have lost interest and would treat you likewise.  I never get that level of dismissiveness from clients, if anything they always say how keen they are to see you again. They look happy and satisfied. ONS on the other hand, can't wait to get rid of you.  It's not like I need the validation but I don't like the dishonesty of a person telling you that they like you and then not even looking in your eye after.

Most clients are not like that which is why I would rather a punter than a one night stand with some bloke who took me out for an average meal ANY day!