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Author Topic: He gave me 20 quid for an overnight!  (Read 5790 times)

meetingdiversity

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Re: He gave me 20 quid for an overnight!
« Reply #30 on: 15 November 2012, 07:01:25 pm »
Quote from: ladyofthemansion on 14 November 2012, 06:02:56 pm
A regular drained me tody with his constant texts while I was on route. I actually ended up nauseated and made an excuse and canceled him.

That is so annoying when they text several times after booking smelling a rat.
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Libertariana

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  • Posts: 44
Re: He gave me 20 quid for an overnight!
« Reply #31 on: 15 November 2012, 08:23:06 pm »
   
     I am unapologetic in my conclusion that there really is absolutely NO GREY AREA at all, with regard interpreting this behavior or deciding upon the subsequent consequences this mans behavior should incur! 


     His conduct was; disrespectful, manipulative, arrogant, egotistical, warped, narcissistic, demeaning, derogatory.  The list is endless.  What is worst of all though, is that it appears to be, at least somewhat, premeditated!, almost as if he was 'testing the water' to see what he might actually 'get away with'.


"This is all that you are worth"


     This statement alone is beyond reproach.  Combined with his totally regressive, childish attempts to make you 'dance for the money' (basically expecting you to totally humiliate yourself in such a way that would strip you of any degree of self dignity or CONTROL over the situation) is sickening.


    The fact he is a long term, respected regular, whom, as a result of your acknowledgement of his 'special' standing as more than just an 'average' client, only serves to make this worse, not indeed deserving of greater concessions to this vile conduct.  Again, this very fact serves only to make his behaviour worse, as he is again abusing the privileges afforded him by you, which are based on a mutual appreciation to the 'bonuses' and 'benefits' such a 'special relationship' affords BOTH sides. 


     As such, in my opinion, HE HAS CHOSEN to forgo any special discounts/privileges/ terms/extras and in continuing to extend such terms to him after this behaviour, in my eyes, opens the door and gives a 'green light' to any such similar bullshit.  Simply, brushing this under the carpet and writing it off as a 'one off' I'd bet my bottom dollar would result in you posting on here after in the near future, having been forced to seek solace and a place to 'vent' after a follow up episode.
 

You can only be treated by others, how you allow yourself to be treated.
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"If you seek to know the truth, cease to cherish opinions"

Libertariana

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  • Posts: 44
Re: He gave me 20 quid for an overnight!
« Reply #32 on: 15 November 2012, 08:43:00 pm »

     As for 'being in two minds' as to whether or not to see him again, obviously only you are both adequately informed with regard the context and history of your unique situation and your personal 'relationship' with this, erm, 'gentlemen' and it is only you whom, in the end can make the right decision for yourself, your body, your boundaries and your sanity!


     I don't know the procedure by which you normally arrange your appointments with him or what level of contact (if any) you maintain outwith your booking arrangement correspondences.  Moreover I'm not privy to the exact extent of the financial discount you have come to agree with him. All these factors, of course, will influence the decision you make about any future meetings with him.


Personally, I would be totally unmovable and strict in not allowing myself to be too lax about dealing with this so as to make sure I had 'nipped this in the bud' immediately and that there was no room what so ever for any misunderstanding or lack of clarity that such conduct is wholly unacceptable and simply won't be tolerated in any shape or form.

1)  I would NOT contact him in any way at all and be insistent that it was him whom made contact with you first.  It must be him whom initiates communication spontaneously an not simply in response to your request.

2)  I'd only consider any further contact if, in his first message, he was to show total recognition of the implications of his behaviour and demonstrate a full comprehension of WHY you might be impacted by his behaviour, HOW this could affect you and WHAT he should never have done. 

3)  I'd expect him to illustrate 100% responsibility for the situation and no indication that you are not 'getting the joke' or any glimpse of an attempt to twist the events round to make any of it your responsibility.

4)  Change my policy to ONLY ever accepting payment in full at the beginning off ANY booking no matter with whom or under what circumstance.  Anyone not forthcoming does not get the appointment.    NON NEGOTIABLE!
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"If you seek to know the truth, cease to cherish opinions"

WelshieGirly

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Re: He gave me 20 quid for an overnight!
« Reply #33 on: 16 November 2012, 10:40:13 am »
Quote from: Libertariana on 15 November 2012, 08:23:06 pm
   
       His conduct was; disrespectful, manipulative, arrogant, egotistical, warped, narcissistic, demeaning, derogatory.  The list is endless.  What is worst of all though, is that it appears to be, at least somewhat, premeditated!, almost as if he was 'testing the water' to see what he might actually 'get away with'.


"This is all that you are worth"

I have known this socially challenged individual for a long time. I wasn't and didn't put up with this behavior by shoving the 20 back in his pocket (forcefully) and ignoring him. Showing him that his behavior was out of order, over the years I have seriously had to teach him how to talk and act to a woman, what to do and what not to do. This was one of these what NOT to do lessons.

Like I said it was a joke in seriously poor taste because he has the social skills of a gnat! He has apologized for his behavior and just thought he was being funny...

I will ignore him now until the New year, not accept any more over night bookings and only do hourly meets once a month.

He has already text me a handful of times (chit chat texts) non of which I have replied to and one asking if he could make an hour booking to which I replied with - Can't already booked.
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