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Author Topic: How to put clients off...world championship  (Read 25258 times)

Cat_BBW

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Re: How to put clients off...world championship
« Reply #45 on: 28 September 2016, 10:59:38 pm »
Quote from: VoluptuousCurves on 28 September 2016, 08:37:13 pm
When you're 90 mins into a 2hr booking and your cat decides to make an unscheduled appearance on the bed. Like literally ON THE BED.

Him: WTF?
Me: I'm so sorry, it's my cat, she's a pain. Fuck off cat!
Cat: [He's been here 90 mins so I'm gonna assume he's your boyfriend now. Gettin comfy.]

I really need a new work flat where the layout allows me to shut her out  :-[

Sorry (not sorry) but *loves the cat and gives it scrubbles*.

I love cat logic.
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Kay

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Re: How to put clients off...world championship
« Reply #46 on: 29 September 2016, 12:25:06 am »
Quote from: VoluptuousCurves on 28 September 2016, 08:37:13 pm
When you're 90 mins into a 2hr booking and your cat decides to make an unscheduled appearance on the bed. Like literally ON THE BED.

Him: WTF?
Me: I'm so sorry, it's my cat, she's a pain. Fuck off cat!
Cat: [He's been here 90 mins so I'm gonna assume he's your boyfriend now. Gettin comfy.]

I really need a new work flat where the layout allows me to shut her out  :-[

He should be grateful it didn't do what my sister's cat did, and jump on her boyfriend's back as they were shagging...  :D
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VoluptuousCurves

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Re: How to put clients off...world championship
« Reply #47 on: 29 September 2016, 07:06:23 am »
In retrospect it was funny but I was mortified last night. Thankfully he didn't book via AW so won't be leaving a review about the "extra pussy"  :D
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TrashAzn

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Re: How to put clients off...world championship
« Reply #48 on: 29 September 2016, 11:05:02 am »
This is why I only have a hamster but he does occasionally make noise during a booking, Was riding a client once and he just started giggling uncontrollably and I asked him what he's laughing at and it was the hamster going apeshit running around his cage then running on the wheel and jumping off flinging itself around. Hamsters are weird sometimes.
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MandyVine

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Re: How to put clients off...world championship
« Reply #49 on: 29 September 2016, 04:22:07 pm »
Quote from: VoluptuousCurves on 29 September 2016, 07:06:23 am
In retrospect it was funny but I was mortified last night. Thankfully he didn't book via AW so won't be leaving a review about the "extra pussy"  :D

I literally choked on my tea!  Good one, VC!   ;D ;D ;D
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VoluptuousCurves

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Re: How to put clients off...world championship
« Reply #50 on: 02 October 2016, 09:03:21 pm »
Him: Hi I'm peter could you cover me in sundried tomatoes please?
Me: Sorry mate I'm too working class. How about Aldi Ketchup?
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Nova

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Re: How to put clients off...world championship
« Reply #51 on: 03 October 2016, 07:29:18 pm »
Quote from: VoluptuousCurves on 28 September 2016, 08:37:13 pm
When you're 90 mins into a 2hr booking and your cat decides to make an unscheduled appearance on the bed. Like literally ON THE BED.

Him: WTF?
Me: I'm so sorry, it's my cat, she's a pain. Fuck off cat!
Cat: [He's been here 90 mins so I'm gonna assume he's your boyfriend now. Gettin comfy.]

I really need a new work flat where the layout allows me to shut her out  :-[

I shut my 2 cats in the kitchen during bookings. 1 day, 1 of them didn't come in when I rattled the treat box. I figured he was snuggled up somewhere too sleepy to move.
He sure was and that place turned out to be on top of the wardrobe in my work room. Riding the client, I looked up and saw cat staring down at me with a puzzled look on his face. *Please stay up there. Please be quiet.*
Nope. 20 seconds later he thudded down onto the bed right next to my client's head and ran off. I could not stop laughing. And apologising.
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Dynamite Doll

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Re: How to put clients off...world championship
« Reply #52 on: 04 October 2016, 07:19:57 pm »
Quote from: Willow Summers on 17 September 2016, 10:17:39 am
Text received - I'd like to book an hour for gfe. Im really good with my tongue and fingers and will make you cum loads.

Me - yep, thats fine but i never cum with clients. I can put on a good act though if you want?

Silence

I wasnt in a very good mood that day lol

hhahaha hilarious I am the same. I don't cum with clients only with female booking or couple play but that again is lady makes me cum. Men always fail and think its a must to make me cum hahaha this is funny.  ;D
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ladyinred

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Re: How to put clients off...world championship
« Reply #53 on: 05 October 2016, 04:47:28 pm »
Quote from: VoluptuousCurves on 28 September 2016, 08:37:13 pm
When you're 90 mins into a 2hr booking and your cat decides to make an unscheduled appearance on the bed. Like literally ON THE BED.

Him: WTF?
Me: I'm so sorry, it's my cat, she's a pain. Fuck off cat!
Cat: [He's been here 90 mins so I'm gonna assume he's your boyfriend now. Gettin comfy.]

I really need a new work flat where the layout allows me to shut her out  :-[

My cat always stays in the room I work in  ;D no one can move her, it's her house  ;D
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Marianne

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Re: How to put clients off...world championship
« Reply #54 on: 05 October 2016, 10:49:54 pm »
Quote from: VoluptuousCurves on 28 September 2016, 08:37:13 pm
When you're 90 mins into a 2hr booking and your cat decides to make an unscheduled appearance on the bed. Like literally ON THE BED.

Him: WTF?
Me: I'm so sorry, it's my cat, she's a pain. Fuck off cat!
Cat: [He's been here 90 mins so I'm gonna assume he's your boyfriend now. Gettin comfy.]

I really need a new work flat where the layout allows me to shut her out  :-[

Love this, used to happen to me a lot in my flat, she would be hidden in the cloth wardrobe and just jump out half way through! I have 3 cats now and one of them meow's outside the work room door frequently! I wonder whether I should put it on my profile that you must like cats?! I do worry what if someone turns up who has an allergy, but then I think nah, fuck 'em. I got plenty antihistamines! I also prefer my clients who are nice to and stop and fuss my cats! One cat will go to anyone but my boy cat only likes women so if he's nice to a punter I tend to think they must be pretty special! Sorry to go so off topic about cats, but well hey, cats!
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MM xx

Marianne

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Re: How to put clients off...world championship
« Reply #55 on: 05 October 2016, 10:52:56 pm »
Him "will anyone else be there?"
Me " well my gay lodger will be in his room but he doesn't come up and watch or anything!"
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MM xx

Aqua Allegoria

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Re: How to put clients off...world championship
« Reply #56 on: 07 October 2016, 04:59:23 pm »
Quote from: BibiofLeeds on 17 September 2016, 01:56:26 pm
'What can I get for 30?'
'A weeks shop at Aldi'

Oh boy that's too good!!!
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ladyinred

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Re: How to put clients off...world championship
« Reply #57 on: 07 October 2016, 08:05:07 pm »
Thank God, idiots asking for discounts and 15min quickie didn't hassle me so much this week....
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Hadley

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Re: How to put clients off...world championship
« Reply #58 on: 08 October 2016, 06:25:39 pm »
Was reading Little Red Riding Hood to my little niece this morning - she's at at an age where she wants the same story read again, and again, and again. So it was in my head.

So, having left and then checked into my incall property, meet client who has a big thing about being told he has a really huge cock. After about 15 mins I zone out slightly... And said before I realised "What a big cock you have..... GRANDMA"

Don't think he'll be coming back!
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VoluptuousCurves

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Re: How to put clients off...world championship
« Reply #59 on: 08 October 2016, 06:59:15 pm »
Quote from: Hadley on 08 October 2016, 06:25:39 pm
Was reading Little Red Riding Hood to my little niece this morning - she's at at an age where she wants the same story read again, and again, and again. So it was in my head.

So, having left and then checked into my incall property, meet client who has a big thing about being told he has a really huge cock. After about 15 mins I zone out slightly... And said before I realised "What a big cock you have..... GRANDMA"

Don't think he'll be coming back!

Oh god this is gold!  ;D ;D ;D
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And me, I am not a mess, I am a wilderness, yes
The undiscovered continent for you to undress
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