I have a huge list of things I need to do on line and books I haven't read and when I get short quiet spells and the knowledge of bookings later I manage to get stuck in to those things.

When its totally dead I go in a dark mood, not knowing what to do, not knowing if I can go in to the local town or a swim because my phone may ring and may not get back in time.

Yesterday I had the horrible thought of being stuck in a hotel on a roasting day when I could have been in park with my Grandson. Got a bit tearful and managed to get a refund and out after 3 hours in there(the aircon not working was my get out)

Days like that I wonder what the f I am doing.

Yesterday was made worse by the only booking being a no show. He had booked only 45 minutes before as well.