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Author Topic: How not to book an escort,world championships!  (Read 2655674 times)

WelshieGirly

  • Guest
Re: How not to book an escort,world championships!
« Reply #3540 on: 14 October 2012, 09:15:28 am »
Hello everyone :)

Not a new member but hardly ever post so i though I would say hello!

Got this text from a reg -

Him: Shopping trip required!
Me: For What? *Thinking: ooo I get presents as well as my hourly fee*
Him: Need new clothes to impress new gf, need you to help me! *Damn it!*
Me: What do I get in return? *Thinking: well I will still charge you my hourly fee and try and get free stuff too!*
Him: Well its not sex so I wont pay you, but you will have my eternal gratitude and appreciation, maybe lunch too!

At this point I am wondering if I can pay my bills with the doggy bag I might take away from lunch!

Me: You will have to come up with something better than that!
Him: Oh... ok... will let you know...

I love how he comes across at the end of the text like I am being unreasonable! I am going to find out how much a personal shopper chargers an hour and send him over the details!
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VioletteUK

  • Sr. Member
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  • Posts: 499
    • Cassandra Deville
Re: How not to book an escort,world championships!
« Reply #3541 on: 15 October 2012, 08:30:02 am »
Quote from: F-g on 14 October 2012, 09:15:28 am
Hello everyone :)

Not a new member but hardly ever post so i though I would say hello!

Got this text from a reg -

Him: Shopping trip required!
Me: For What? *Thinking: ooo I get presents as well as my hourly fee*
Him: Need new clothes to impress new gf, need you to help me! *Damn it!*
Me: What do I get in return? *Thinking: well I will still charge you my hourly fee and try and get free stuff too!*
Him: Well its not sex so I wont pay you, but you will have my eternal gratitude and appreciation, maybe lunch too!

At this point I am wondering if I can pay my bills with the doggy bag I might take away from lunch!

Me: You will have to come up with something better than that!
Him: Oh... ok... will let you know...

I love how he comes across at the end of the text like I am being unreasonable! I am going to find out how much a personal shopper chargers an hour and send him over the details!
You might find they charge more than you!  ;D
You may also remind him, that he isn't paying you for sex, but your time. Cheeky sod.
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Friday

  • Sr. Member
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  • Posts: 989
Re: How not to book an escort,world championships!
« Reply #3542 on: 15 October 2012, 01:22:45 pm »
Came home to this text:

I'm 36 I'm kinky I wear panties. I have tatts and piercings and love to be pissed in and on xxxx



eh.. congratulations?  ???
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Ruby Reid And Alex

  • Guest
Re: How not to book an escort,world championships!
« Reply #3543 on: 15 October 2012, 04:06:08 pm »
Guy by text yesterday afternoon: Hey hun how's you x
Us: <blurb about if he'd like to make a booking tell us when/how long/what he wants to do>
Guy: Saturday 20th Oct 2pm feet
Us: <scratching heads> The time is fine, what did you wish to do?
Guy: My name is xxxx, I like smelly feet and bondage
Guy: 2 hours

After a bit more back and forth about whether he was happy to meet us as a couple or not and about the fact we don't offer heavy BDSM and our feet are quite clean thanks:

Guy: Am hour I'd fine, just want to be suffocated
Us: We don't offer suffocation
Guy: And u don't have smelly feet
Us: No sorry
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Kimmy

  • Sr. Member
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  • Posts: 482
Re: How not to book an escort,world championships!
« Reply #3544 on: 15 October 2012, 07:55:42 pm »
text today-

'is your pussy as nice as it looks on your private gallery, and do you do bareback?'

blocked!  ;D
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lucyjuicy

  • Jr. Member
  • **
  • Posts: 89
Re: How not to book an escort,world championships!
« Reply #3545 on: 16 October 2012, 08:26:13 am »
Quote from: Kimmy on 15 October 2012, 07:55:42 pm
text today-

'is your pussy as nice as it looks on your private gallery, and do you do bareback?'

blocked!  ;D

Bless, pussy praise, I'm suprised that wasnt enough for you to jump at the bb offer. Mine looks lovely but can cause a violent allergic reaction if it comes  into contact with bare skin, punch in the face maybe  :FF
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Lacey.walker

  • Jr. Member
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  • Posts: 14
Re: How not to book an escort,world championships!
« Reply #3546 on: 16 October 2012, 08:55:10 am »
Hi ladies,
I find this one annoying but amusing, thought to share.:)
-------

 
Hey,

 
It would be great to use your services if you would like to use mine
 
I am doing different home improvement works, such as:
 
Painting and decorating
Tiling
Plastering
Plumbing
Handyman jobs
Kitchen and bathroom installations
 
If you would require any of these, I would be more than happy to help and we can hopefully exchange our services
 
I have been in the business for years and I give my best with every project.
 
Hope to hear from you, if not now, then maybe in future.
 
 
Cheers,
Paul
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WelshieGirly

  • Guest
Re: How not to book an escort,world championships!
« Reply #3547 on: 16 October 2012, 09:47:33 am »
Quote from: Lacey.walker on 16 October 2012, 08:55:10 am
Hi ladies,
I find this one annoying but amusing, thought to share.:)
-------

These piss me off too, once i replied saying I dont need your services! He said ok and booked anyway! Ha!

This morning is got this message -

Today could be the day! I want to make your boobs swing whats your number.

*deleted* No... today isnt the day!
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ilovedots

  • Sr. Member
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  • Posts: 395
Re: How not to book an escort,world championships!
« Reply #3548 on: 16 October 2012, 12:04:16 pm »
Quote from: F-g on 16 October 2012, 09:47:33 am
This morning is got this message -

Today could be the day! I want to make your boobs swing whats your number.

*deleted* No... today isnt the day!

I had a similar one a while back, made me laugh so much!

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Yes, I'd risk it for a biscuit, as I said, you know me.

Lexi

  • Jr. Member
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  • Posts: 97
Re: How not to book an escort,world championships!
« Reply #3549 on: 16 October 2012, 08:53:10 pm »
Had a lovely guy leave me with 3 texts today which I picked up at the same time as I'm not working today (bearing in mind I don't take booking via text):

1st one: Hi baby, I want to see u at 1330, can you text me ur address

2nd one: What time r u available this afternoon?

3rd one: U are such a bitch

...Took all my will to not respond to this! First time since I started over a year and a half ago I've ever received something like this haha
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Pearl

  • Full Member
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  • Posts: 187
Re: How not to book an escort,world championships!
« Reply #3550 on: 16 October 2012, 09:12:02 pm »
Quote from: Lacey.walker on 16 October 2012, 08:55:10 am
Hi ladies,
I find this one annoying but amusing, thought to share.:)
-------

You had to answer:
"What do you prefer? Gumtree or Cum-for-free?"
 ;D ;D ;D

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DianaMurphy

  • Sr. Member
  • ****
  • Posts: 517
Re: How not to book an escort,world championships!
« Reply #3551 on: 16 October 2012, 09:14:37 pm »
Quote from: Lexi on 16 October 2012, 08:53:10 pm
Had a lovely guy leave me with 3 texts today which I picked up at the same time as I'm not working today (bearing in mind I don't take booking via text):

1st one: Hi baby, I want to see u at 1330, can you text me ur address

2nd one: What time r u available this afternoon?

3rd one: U are such a bitch

...Took all my will to not respond to this! First time since I started over a year and a half ago I've ever received something like this haha

These guys have me in stitches! Of course we're sat around waiting for their text so we can jump to it and see them regardless of what else might be going on! Had a guy ring today and as I wasn't able take the call my automatic call handler asked them to leave a message which he did by text: "Are you available?" As I wasn't able to respond in 8 minutes I got another text "???"!!! Sorry but you're now blacklisted! I don't have the time to spend on people with that kind of attitude!
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Lexi

  • Jr. Member
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  • Posts: 97
Re: How not to book an escort,world championships!
« Reply #3552 on: 16 October 2012, 10:12:29 pm »
I know its pathetic really! The text with ??? has annoyed me just reading that now and would block them too grrr... Same with emails, its so off-putting seeing 2-3 from the same person in one night!
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dee_licious

  • Jr. Member
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  • Posts: 44
Re: How not to book an escort,world championships!
« Reply #3553 on: 16 October 2012, 10:40:34 pm »
i got this charming email this eve on aw

Wud u be up for k9 fun ?

deleted and blocked
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Kimmy

  • Sr. Member
  • ****
  • Posts: 482
Re: How not to book an escort,world championships!
« Reply #3554 on: 16 October 2012, 11:02:04 pm »
Quote from: dee_licious on 16 October 2012, 10:40:34 pm
i got this charming email this eve on aw

Wud u be up for k9 fun ?

deleted and blocked

i had one of those the other week 'hi, would you be interested in k9 intercourse'

i too immedietly blocked, it may be the same person if not it makes me sick!  ;D
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