"would you fuck my dog? x"


 

  Er...?

An email I received: "Fancy meeting up for some fun you horny bitch?"

Ummm, no.

"would you fuck my dog? x"


 

OMFG 

What a gorgeous specimen of manhood! Hiding behind the safety of his computer! Brave too...

wants to do dog sex & would i join in with them. I imediately told him to f off & hung up only to recieve a text saying that he'd meant dogging. 

That happened to me! I told the guy he was a disgusting pervert, and should be ashamed of himself, before cutting him off, then received a text explaining about the 'dogging'...

I did have someone ring up and ask if I did  'doggy massage'.  I told him we could discuss his requirements when he came in for his appointment, to which he answered, 'I'm looking for somebody who likes a laugh and a joke.'
I googled 'doggy massage' and it actually does mean massaging a dog....

I presume when he said he was 'looking for somebody who likes a laugh and a joke', the moron actually meant, 'I'm a time waster, and I'm looking for somebody I can phone up and annoy with my inane questions/sad attempt at 'witty' banter.

Oh gosh nothing but TWs this past few days, why do they come in clusters?   Latest is.......can I come for a quickie........how much is it.........I reply.......?70.

To which he replies.........I ususally get them for ?50, is that ok......

Aaagh don't think I can even be assed to reply......well I did, I just said......my rates are my rates.

This after a guy texted me back and forth.......(neccessitating my having to go check the rules for guests with reception at my serviced appts - they are very strict according to T&C on wall).......asked for an hour, then how much for half an hour.......then phoned and said......well I have to travel an hour each way, its not worth it, I should see you when you get back to Glasgow. 

Grrrrrr could he not have thought of that before messing me around I asked

Sorry for rant ladies

One of my clients yesterday (in actually booking tho not trying to book)
Tried to stick his Tongue down my throat as soon as he got through the door, I turned my head so his kiss landed on my cheek he then asked "oh is this the girlfriend experience?" I said "once I've had my money it is"

Hahaha.  Yes, quite