HIM: ...How will I get into the hotel?
ME: On your feet.  Call when you are here.
HIM: And then what?
ME: Perform a round-off, a backflip and a full-twisting Yurchenko (and NAIL your landing), then click your heels three times and say "She sells sea shells on the seashore".

HIM: ...How will I get into the hotel?
ME: On your feet.  Call when you are here.
HIM: And then what?
ME: Perform a round-off, a backflip and a full-twisting Yurchenko (and NAIL your landing), then click your heels three times and say "She sells sea shells on the seashore".

 

"Hey, would you black up for a booking?"

 

"Hey, would you black up for a booking?"

 

Aaaaah what now?

He's asking if she would do the booking in blackface - 'blacking up' is the British English way of describing a (usually) white person using makeup to darken their skin to make some weird caricature of a black person.

I can't say I've ever been asked that not far off twenty years, so that's definitely one for the oddbod list

Yet another tedious snoozefest

Hi ***********
Hope you are well. Great profile.
I would like to arrange a really kinky session with you for a 90 mins outcall on Friday 13th August at 1:30pm. I will be staying in a hotel near Paddington station.
I'm 38, an attractive, educated, super kinky professional white male.
I’m seriously into Ass worship and would welcome the opportunity of getting up close and personal with that very sexy bum of yours. Seriously gagging to get my face into that ass and asshole of yours. I do have some very kinky requirements which are outlined below. Hopefully you can help me out ;-)

Session details:
I would love, love you to keep your sexy bum unwashed for our session, preferably for 24hrs or as long as you are comfortable with, so as to create an intoxicating au naturel smell I am absolutely craving for our session. This is a real turn on and I would love to appreciate your natural ass scent. If it’s possible it would be a real turn on if you could go to the toilet prior to the start of our session.
As part of this, I would love for you to soil a pair of smooth light coloured big cotton knickers with a few brown skid marks that could be used during our session.

To start our session it would be good if you could keep the pants on and with your dirty unwashed bum you would tease me , making me stick my nose in deep and inhaling to get off on your prepared dirty ass and knickers.
Then as the session progresses you would take the knickers off, turn them inside out and put them back on with the dirty knickers facing me , to stretch over your bum to repeat the teasing, and sniffing. I was thinking that by pulling the crotch away from your bum you could have me suck on your dirty knickers. Really Nasty ;-)

Eventually I'd like you to take the knickers off and I would then be able to really go to town with you making me put my nose right into your dirty ass and being made to rim and clean your dirty asshole good and proper. Nasty ;-)

Would be great to have lots of filthy chat and encouragement as well as oral & hand relief. It would be great if you could edge me for a big build up to orgasm.
Let me know your thoughts if the above is of interest and if you would be up for it. Really would like to session with you and happy to pay extra for this type of session.

Hopefully we can arrange something for Friday 13th August . Please do confirm ASAP so can confirm arrangements.

Best Wishes,
Ashley
Xx
 

 

My fans seem to have gone on holiday, or been sectioned or indeed been sentenced..

Him: Good afterboon can you confirm your services and prices please
Me: Nope. Try checking my AW profile, that's what it's there for after all
Him: Silence