**This is more "how not to offer to pimp an escort"

**
PIMP: You don't have clients? I can help with that. With my promotion You won't have time for answering everyone. And you have a grip on the appearance and age of the people you are meeting. Text me back if you are interested

It's totally free.
ME: With your "promotion", I won't have "time for answering everyone"? Wow, what a great offer! What hooker wants to answer calls and texts from potential customers?
PIMP: (SILENCE)
ME: ...and yes, I want to "grip" the appearance and age of my punters since those two things really matter to me. I don't actually want to make as much MONEY as possible from day to day.
PIMP: (SILENCE)
ME: Your
pimping "promotion" is "totally free"? Here's me thinking Mother Teresa was long dead.
PIMP: (SILENCE)
ME: My dear chap / lady, it's CHRISTMAS Day, not April Fools Day.