Urgh! I must be the queen magnet for oddballs! 

1) Txt at 10pm (a week or so ago) "Are you free?", Me: "I am available", Them: "Whats your AW profile name again", Me..... I rolled over and fell asleep 

2) Email this morning, "are you free today?", my reply "Unfortunately I'm either booked or have appointments today" (The joys of having a WG life and personal life eh? ) His reply "You clearly haven't read my profile then"

Yes, yes, because I'm going too drop everything for someone who has 3 aliases on AW one being a female escort and just because you claim you have the stamina of a ox, doesn't make it true! Do these "punters" think we sit all day picking our noses and watch daytime tv and can't wait for the Hercules of sex to come our way, yes I will drop everything and my clients today for a hour session with you 

What makes the 2nd one funny is, he didn't even read MY profile, it clearly states EVERYWHERE to book in advance to avoid disappointment! Grrrr!

first idiot of the day

“are you nice and tight babe?” (how fucking rude!)

my reply “are you nice and big babe?”

These are the men who quite probably have never and will never book an escort. I never reply to questions or texts like this. It just encourages them.

I always think comments like that sound so juvenile, like the ones who ask if you squirt/gush!

I used to answer rubbish like this with 'Only on a Tuesday/Saturday/Friday' basically whatever day they weren't calling.It generally made them go silent!

When I try to make it clear I do not work evenings and weekends owing to personal commitments then they say 'See you Bank Holiday'.  WTF.

Hannaah ~
That's exactly what they're after🙄. I get that with the military here & while yes, I'm very appreciative of all they do, I'm not giving them a damn discount bc I'm not a park & swap *annoyed look*.

Now I WILL say I've gotten a cpl slices of cake 🎂from a better bakery a few times for a cpl regulars when it's been mentioned, & brought it out as a surprise at the end. They were super appreciative & 1 told me it was all anyone had done for his birthday🙁. DK if it was the truth but jeez. If so....ack.😮

Email
Hi are you single can we talk about a taboo booking.?

Translated as I can't be bothered to acknowledge your profile info and guidelines. I'm a boundary pusher 

VC ~
Good for you! I'd love to know how he reacts♥️🎂! Tell us here or shoot me a PM, I think that's nice you're doing that.
Ive broken down about my dad to 1 before & felt ok bc his father was in hospice & close to death (as mine was). He was very supportive & actually emailed me when his father passed; I offered with complete sincerity to attend the funeral but it was super out of town, so unfortunately I really couldn't go.
He was so appreciative I offered, but he's a great  guy. All hail Bob🙌🏻. Bob rocks. No, that's not his real name.

Somebody has just offered me the opportunity to visit him, he said he hasn't got any money but he has got coffee and refreshments if I fancy some fun!!