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Author Topic: How not to book an escort,world championships!  (Read 2587649 times)

Violette

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Re: How not to book an escort,world championships!
« Reply #465 on: 31 May 2010, 07:36:07 pm »
Ok, now that I have promised you a pie in the sky booking, no money has been exchanged,  send me pictures with your legs spread so wide, I can see your tonsils. Spare me!

Bella86

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Re: How not to book an escort,world championships!
« Reply #466 on: 31 May 2010, 08:25:04 pm »
It gets better.... More from Mr shall you pay for the hotel or shall I. ...
' I'm sharing a room with my uncle so hope that's ok'
'bring some sexy underwear so I can buy it' ..... Lol I mean WTF?!  ::)

UrbaneAspects

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Re: How not to book an escort,world championships!
« Reply #467 on: 01 June 2010, 03:45:55 am »
Diary of a stressed out call boy:

Today: 1 actual booking, but 3 'close' serious sounding inquries. As in, sitting down and dissecting whether they were full of shit or not. Thats 4 different men I had to cater to, and only 1 actually booked.

Why cant I just have mother fuckers lined up...in the order they are recieved? I hate having to re-arrange my schedule and shit!  >:(

Bella86

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Re: How not to book an escort,world championships!
« Reply #468 on: 01 June 2010, 09:11:11 am »
Don't mean to hog this, but this one did make ne chuckle:

'good morning. Thanks for your email reply, but I'm afraid making an appointment with you is rather like making an appoitnment to see the queen. So I'll leave it thanks'

cheeky bugger! All I asked for were some info such as his name etc & advised him I had a driver for security! :p

EmilyJones

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Re: How not to book an escort,world championships!
« Reply #469 on: 01 June 2010, 02:38:02 pm »
Don't mean to hog this, but this one did make ne chuckle:

'good morning. Thanks for your email reply, but I'm afraid making an appointment with you is rather like making an appoitnment to see the queen. So I'll leave it thanks'

cheeky bugger! All I asked for were some info such as his name etc & advised him I had a driver for security! :p

Isn't it wonderfully helpful when they kindly take the time to inform you that they are crotchety old wankers who probably don't wash properly and like to leave bitchy bad reviews should a girl dare to point out his BO? I mean, he's saving you the trouble of possibly going through all this by declining an appointment with you! What a nice man. ;D
Disclosure: The other person behind yourescortsite.com

UrbaneAspects

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Re: How not to book an escort,world championships!
« Reply #470 on: 01 June 2010, 06:24:46 pm »
it wonderfully helpful when they kindly take the time to inform you that they are crotchety old wankers who probably don't wash properly and like to leave bitchy bad reviews should a girl dare to point out his BO? I mean, he's saving you the trouble of possibly going through all this by declining an appointment with you! What a nice man. ;D

I hate when people do that! Its like, don't insult me over something stupid to try and make me feel bad. You were never interested in the 1st place!

cassie

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Re: How not to book an escort,world championships!
« Reply #471 on: 07 June 2010, 02:29:59 am »
Having spent the past week Reading & laughing til I cried at this topic :) today am proud to have one of my own to share....

Hi

I am staying at the De Vere Belton Woods Hotel  and do so each month and am keen to bring an attractive and energetic young lady to my suite and the opportunity to teach her how to be a perfect mistress and to squirt is an ideal challenge.

The fee will be $450 per session wit

Can you send me a few appropriate photographs to show full what I shall be paying for.

You will need to be shaved.

If the pictures, and you, are good enough then I shall be happy to pay a suitable bonus  for the night girl. I am English, a gentleman in my mid forties and am energetic something I wish to have in a mistress,

The pictures should be excellent and show you nude, perhaps with toys.

Then I can send  a car to collect you.

If you are able to send suitable pictures soon we can arrange to have our first meal later today in my hotel.

Be quick!

Let me know.

Kind regards,



Be quick.... The cheeky sod ! When it clearly states I need 24 hours notice!
And I don't want to be picked up by your 'driver' when Ive never met you before ta v much  ::). Lol

If the pictures, and you, are good enough
That was the kicker for me! PSML.

Voicemail left 10 minutes ago in a slow slurring voice:

Hi ... call me .......... brurrarhh (or something like that) ... looked at you ........ on internet, like ... you look ok ..... call me.

Hey, that kind of flattery gets me going every time.
Live your life in such a way that when your feet hit the ground in the morning, Satan shudders and says: "Oh shit, she's awake!"

Bella86

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Re: How not to book an escort,world championships!
« Reply #472 on: 07 June 2010, 09:14:56 am »
Haha 'call me.. You look... Ok'.    That tickled me! Flattery will get you, err, nowhere in this case.  ;D

I had a choice one yesterday that said, ' I don't know why you won't see me. I thought whores weren't fussy??'

I think you've answered your own question there matey!

Bella86

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Re: How not to book an escort,world championships!
« Reply #473 on: 08 June 2010, 03:04:52 pm »
Nothing but TW today.... First a cancellation from one who 'had a cold'
Then a number of hagglers, 'I'd be willing to pay ?360 if your friend gets involved to...' and my personal favourite 'money is tight this month, how much for just a BJ...?50?More money can come next month :)'

Think I'm taking the rest of the day off!!! >:(
« Last Edit: 08 June 2010, 03:06:33 pm by Bella86 »

Dani

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Re: How not to book an escort,world championships!
« Reply #474 on: 08 June 2010, 03:22:21 pm »
I had a great text today

hi Danie (cant even get my name right)

I want u 2 use me 4 cash. how bout I cum n u give me bj and ball busting. ill give ya ?50 now then put cash in ur bank weekly if you give me ur bank details

With an offer like that how could I refuse to give you my bank details, would you like my credit cards, house and car keys as well?
Truth is far more important than what one wants to hear. With truth there is no us and them or colour or religion there is just fact

Bella86

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Re: How not to book an escort,world championships!
« Reply #475 on: 08 June 2010, 03:35:55 pm »
Wow, a whole ?50 now?! How could you resist such a generous offer.....lol  ::)

pandora

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    • Pandora
Re: How not to book an escort,world championships!
« Reply #476 on: 08 June 2010, 04:52:28 pm »
Today I had, " do I offer 15 min bookings in a secluded wood?"

What is the etiquette for such a booking? Do I bring the shotgun and spade or does the punter?

Amber Sweetpetite

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Re: How not to book an escort,world championships!
« Reply #477 on: 08 June 2010, 05:27:19 pm »
Hi , how much would a 1 hour outcall with you watching me poo and pee on myself and us watching extreme illegal porn cost?
Thanks

 ::)


Urgh, I've had the same text twice!  :(

Yup I've had that one too!

Amber Sweetpetite

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Re: How not to book an escort,world championships!
« Reply #478 on: 08 June 2010, 05:32:26 pm »
Has anyone turned up to a booking where the guy has your website printed off, page for page?And refers to it word for word?

I've seen a few guys who have printed my pics off but not the text.

Amber Sweetpetite

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Re: How not to book an escort,world championships!
« Reply #479 on: 08 June 2010, 05:36:53 pm »
Just read this thread from start to finish. Flippin fantastic! I've had some weird and wonderful ones over the years I wished I'd saved them. One I can recall from a guy who said he was a dwarf and he wanted me to carry him around. Erm hello? I'm 7 stone and 5 feet tall  ::)