I had a text session with our Michael last night as he woke me up (forgot to switch phone off) with his usual, I'm Michael, speech impediment, disabled.........
and I'm afraid I lost it as I'm actually on the verge of a breakdown right now.
I text back 'yes we all know you Michael with the speech impediment, disability, who likes water sports, who drives escorts from Lands End to John O'Groats insane with constant texts and asking them to phone you back. STOP TEXTING ME...delete my number NOW!'
He replied..Fuck off you lying twat.
I ignored it....then got...Why are you escorts all so nasty? I'm really upset now.
I calmed down and told him that we're not nasty, we just don't see the point in someone disturbing us (and in my case waking me up) with inane texts.
He said he's nervous because of his disability and wants someone he can trust!
So I asked him where he was...he said Newcastle, so I told him there was no point bothing escorts in London and Scotland then. I advised him to find a site for escorts in his area and contact one there. He then asked what he should say to them
as they get mad if he phones because of his speech and get mad if he texts too. So I explained to just text ONCE explaining his situation and if they reply take it from there...and to try and make them feel a bit special...like you've chosen them because when 100 escorts are getting the same inane texts it certainly doesn't make you feel special. He thanked me for the advice and said he felt better now (as I'd really upset him before...which I did feel bad about, hence me calming down and giving him advice) So thought I'd done my good deed for the night and hoped he would find what he was looking for.........
and what happens?
I'm woken up in the morning by the same freaking, Hi I'm Michael text