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Author Topic: How not to book an escort,world championships!  (Read 2656119 times)

VioletteUK

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Re: How not to book an escort,world championships!
« Reply #4200 on: 11 April 2013, 12:40:18 pm »
Annoying email du jour.
how much for one?
I replied, being bored and all.
One what? An arm, a leg, an eye? One what?
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Orchid

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Re: How not to book an escort,world championships!
« Reply #4201 on: 12 April 2013, 06:37:06 am »
 @ 2pm yesterday  from a texter. are you free?
                            me-call to book please.
                             texter I cant
                             me, then I don't take youre booking,.
                            texter after 3,30pm , I called you you said 4 pm !!!
                             me, I hadn't even spoken with you , as you claimed you couldn't call !!!  ::)

ladyjennaj

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Re: How not to book an escort,world championships!
« Reply #4202 on: 12 April 2013, 10:20:49 am »
'I would like to f*ck you anally, and then rub myself all over your face.'  ::)

Nice....

Orchid

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Re: How not to book an escort,world championships!
« Reply #4203 on: 12 April 2013, 10:29:31 am »
'I would like to f*ck you anally, and then rub myself all over your face.'  ::)

Nice....
not in your lifetime !!!

Ruby Reid And Alex

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Re: How not to book an escort,world championships!
« Reply #4204 on: 13 April 2013, 05:16:47 pm »
A side-effect of Adultwork's downtime:

"hi, the adult work website doesn't seem to load so i've been unable to view that profile, i would ask you then if you send me more pictures and maybe some videos if you have some available to send."

We told him that he'd have to make do with the content on our website and wait for AW to be back online, and then we got this just now:

"Hi, now that the adultwork website is back up i did have a look at your profile however i have no credits on the site so i wasn't able to view your private album, so would it be possible for you to send me some pictures and videos as many as you could would be great, via email."

*rolls eyes*

Redhead

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Re: How not to book an escort,world championships!
« Reply #4205 on: 13 April 2013, 07:06:23 pm »
Text received a couple of days ago:

'I love pregnant lady's call me xxx'

Phone call today: 'Are you beautiful'. No, I'm hideous...
'Reach for the stars
And if you don't grab them at least you'e on top of the world
Tonight I will love, love you tonight
Give me everything tonight
For all we know we might not get tomorrow
Let's do it tonight' - 'Give Me Everything' by Pitbull feat Neo

Coty

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Re: How not to book an escort,world championships!
« Reply #4206 on: 13 April 2013, 08:05:38 pm »
A side-effect of Adultwork's downtime:

"hi, the adult work website doesn't seem to load so i've been unable to view that profile, i would ask you then if you send me more pictures and maybe some videos if you have some available to send."

We told him that he'd have to make do with the content on our website and wait for AW to be back online, and then we got this just now:

"Hi, now that the adultwork website is back up i did have a look at your profile however i have no credits on the site so i wasn't able to view your private album, so would it be possible for you to send me some pictures and videos as many as you could would be great, via email."

*rolls eyes*

I've been getting a few of those...as Adultwork is down, messages!  Had one last night from a guy I saw ages ago....."As AW is down I can't browse, but luckily I still have your number stored so can you come out now?"  hahaha...Feel so flattered...NOT....any port in a storm and last chicken in Sainsburys both came to mind! lmao So I declined! Maybe cutting off my nose to spite my face again, but I'd like to be chosen because they WANT to see me, not because there's no alternative! hahahaha

x-Veronica-x

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Re: How not to book an escort,world championships!
« Reply #4207 on: 13 April 2013, 08:56:03 pm »
Hi hun I'm jay from kings guards i have a position for a girl / girls to act as my girlfriend at celeb functions and parties,weddings etc.. about 6 or 7 times a month I have a security company that i supply security and bodyguards to the rich and famous i have proof who and what i am and the rates are 700min a time plus transport and expenses etc.. if your interested email me and we're have a chat and see if your the one sweet x I need a sexy lady / lady's who I can trust likes a laugh and willing to do what it takes in return I pay 700 per venue supply phone transport insurances even a 200 per venue clothing allowance obviously it needs to look and feel real and were relaxed together so that you ?


I think someone's in fantasy land :)
At a guess I reckon he's copy and pasted this many times
You can always count on a murderer for a fancy prose style--Vladimir Nabokov

ClaireJayne

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Re: How not to book an escort,world championships!
« Reply #4208 on: 13 April 2013, 11:55:58 pm »
I am in absolute hysterics reading these comments, thanks ladies for keeping me entertained  ;D

This from one emailer........(I say emailer because he got no further)

'I am based in NW London and had to extend my search radius to find you. Indeed I can't recall the last time I saw an escort south of the river (I hope this doesn't sound snobbish!) but why would I pay ?200 per hour for someone south of the river, that seams unreasonable'.................and he ends the email with...............PS - I hope you aren't put off by beards. I keep mine reasonably trimmed and have been told by ladies that it feels good when deployed in sensitive areas, deployed WTF? is his beard off to war?

I've not responded, I have a policy of not responding to idiots, but he keeps emailing everyday wanting to know why I will not see him which makes me chuckle.

Coty

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Re: How not to book an escort,world championships!
« Reply #4209 on: 14 April 2013, 02:16:26 am »
PS - I hope you aren't put off by beards. I keep mine reasonably trimmed and have been told by ladies that it feels good when deployed in sensitive areas, deployed WTF? is his beard off to war?


bwahahahahahahahaha

Thank you so much....that's made my day...hilarious! 

Coty

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Re: How not to book an escort,world championships!
« Reply #4210 on: 14 April 2013, 02:49:20 am »
Not only have I had Hi....my name's Phil, this week but I've gained another one who has text me 10 times now. I replied 3 times. 1st answering his question...2nd and 3rd times telling him he's asked before. Since then I've ignored it.  So who else has had...........Hi how are you? I'm Michael (sometimes Mick, sometimes Micky) age 28 you mind me having a speech problem? Just mild.

VioletteUK

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Re: How not to book an escort,world championships!
« Reply #4211 on: 14 April 2013, 05:17:19 am »
PS - I hope you aren't put off by beards. I keep mine reasonably trimmed and have been told by ladies that it feels good when deployed in sensitive areas, deployed WTF? is his beard off to war?


bwahahahahahahahaha

Thank you so much....that's made my day...hilarious!
+1 :D
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strawberry

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Re: How not to book an escort,world championships!
« Reply #4212 on: 14 April 2013, 07:08:35 am »
Not only have I had Hi....my name's Phil, this week but I've gained another one who has text me 10 times now. I replied 3 times. 1st answering his question...2nd and 3rd times telling him he's asked before. Since then I've ignored it.  So who else has had...........Hi how are you? I'm Michael (sometimes Mick, sometimes Micky) age 28 you mind me having a speech problem? Just mild.

Oh deary me I've had someone texting me claiming to have a speech problem, often late at night. Could it be the same person?

Just checked and the wording, name used is the same.

foxydeelight

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Re: How not to book an escort,world championships!
« Reply #4213 on: 14 April 2013, 08:13:13 am »
Not only have I had Hi....my name's Phil, this week but I've gained another one who has text me 10 times now. I replied 3 times. 1st answering his question...2nd and 3rd times telling him he's asked before. Since then I've ignored it.  So who else has had...........Hi how are you? I'm Michael (sometimes Mick, sometimes Micky) age 28 you mind me having a speech problem? Just mild.

Oh deary me I've had someone texting me claiming to have a speech problem, often late at night. Could it be the same person?

Just checked and the wording, name used is the same.
.
Ive had that text, glad ive,seen this now and relieved i didnt reply ( only cos phone was off)  :)
About me ...  Perfect?? Hell no !!..Mistakes !! Hell Yes!!! Blunders and foibles??? Absolutely! A work in Progress??? Always :D

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Caledonia

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Re: How not to book an escort,world championships!
« Reply #4214 on: 14 April 2013, 09:50:14 am »
Not only have I had Hi....my name's Phil, this week but I've gained another one who has text me 10 times now. I replied 3 times. 1st answering his question...2nd and 3rd times telling him he's asked before. Since then I've ignored it.  So who else has had...........Hi how are you? I'm Michael (sometimes Mick, sometimes Micky) age 28 you mind me having a speech problem? Just mild.

I had someone the other day claim to have a speech problem, when I asked what type of speech problem and how severe they replied with "Its ok I can understand you", great he can understand me (how he knew this via text I dont know), but doesnt answer  my question or say if I would be able to understand him.

Think its an idiot doing the rounds lol