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Author Topic: How not to book an escort,world championships!  (Read 2655791 times)

Emma_C

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Re: How not to book an escort,world championships!
« Reply #9570 on: 08 July 2016, 10:33:46 pm »
Some cockney sounding geezer just left a voicemail at 22.30 " I'm a boxer out of practice, wondered if you are about tonight" WTF? He thinks I'm a potential sparing partner or something... :-\

Just An Escort

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Re: How not to book an escort,world championships!
« Reply #9571 on: 09 July 2016, 12:11:31 pm »
This can only be from an older guy, it's pretty incomprehensible though!

"Hllo i wld be gfl if u wld pls txt me and let me knw if u hve avy for one hr sssn incll nxt sat ligh dom arm wstl tie tease fce stg schl girl pin pny ply john"

My translation so far is:

"Hello I would be grateful if you would please text me and let me know if you have availability for one hour session incall next saturday light domination arm wrestle tie tease face sitting school girl" and I just can't work out what "pin pny ply" could mean - why is he so allergic to vowels!?

VoluptuousCurves

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Re: How not to book an escort,world championships!
« Reply #9572 on: 09 July 2016, 01:12:25 pm »
Something pony play? Or ponytail, give the school girl mention ?
And me, I am not a mess, I am a wilderness, yes
The undiscovered continent for you to undress

Willow Summers

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Re: How not to book an escort,world championships!
« Reply #9573 on: 09 July 2016, 02:19:07 pm »
Pin the tail on the pony?

Red KB

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Re: How not to book an escort,world championships!
« Reply #9574 on: 09 July 2016, 02:55:12 pm »
AW Message

Him: "I just wanted to ask if you have a size limit for escorting? I know some girls are offended by guys who are too small. I wanted to make sure you would be ok with my size before I try to book you."

Me : "I am happy to see anyone as long as they are well mannered and clean"

Him: "Thanks. If its not too personal, whats the smallest you have had please? Do you have any experience with guy who are very small and inexperienced? Should I tell you my size so you know what you will have to deal with? I am just a bit worried that you might change your mind when you actually see it. x"

Me: "I don't really recall as I don't pay that much attention to size and it really won't be a problem."

Can't believe he hasn't replied again!
We're women, it's what we do. I just get paid for it.

Cat_BBW

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Re: How not to book an escort,world championships!
« Reply #9575 on: 09 July 2016, 03:53:06 pm »
AW Message

Him: "I just wanted to ask if you have a size limit for escorting? I know some girls are offended by guys who are too small. I wanted to make sure you would be ok with my size before I try to book you."

Me : "I am happy to see anyone as long as they are well mannered and clean"

Him: "Thanks. If its not too personal, whats the smallest you have had please? Do you have any experience with guy who are very small and inexperienced? Should I tell you my size so you know what you will have to deal with? I am just a bit worried that you might change your mind when you actually see it. x"

Me: "I don't really recall as I don't pay that much attention to size and it really won't be a problem."

Can't believe he hasn't replied again!

He totally wanted small penis humiliation for free.

Just An Escort

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Re: How not to book an escort,world championships!
« Reply #9576 on: 09 July 2016, 04:11:49 pm »
Pin the tail on the pony?

 ;D apparently he meant pony play and being pinned down!

Willow Summers

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Re: How not to book an escort,world championships!
« Reply #9577 on: 09 July 2016, 04:57:48 pm »
;D apparently he meant pony play and being pinned down!

Lol, i hope he messages more, we can use them in quiz!

VoluptuousCurves

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Re: How not to book an escort,world championships!
« Reply #9578 on: 09 July 2016, 07:51:03 pm »
String of texts tonight all from the same idiot:
Hi I'm looking for older girl
Like your self love a mature pussy hope and bet your stink of nice warm fish down there
I have enough Connections and I sell my ass I'm looking for a regular bitch I have money I'm footballer
I'm looking for sex but also business partner me my girl and bloke

 :o
And me, I am not a mess, I am a wilderness, yes
The undiscovered continent for you to undress

newbieNW

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Re: How not to book an escort,world championships!
« Reply #9579 on: 09 July 2016, 08:15:12 pm »
Gad  ::) ::)


Naughtyforty

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Re: How not to book an escort,world championships!
« Reply #9580 on: 09 July 2016, 08:39:51 pm »
Gad  ::) ::)

 Pmsl  ;D
But according to google the modern translation of gad is
Pathetic,   gay + sad = gad
I prefer my granny's version lol. Yuck.

newbieNW

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Re: How not to book an escort,world championships!
« Reply #9581 on: 09 July 2016, 10:24:50 pm »
 ;D Yes, ma'am  xx  :-*

Roxy101

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Re: How not to book an escort,world championships!
« Reply #9582 on: 09 July 2016, 11:51:00 pm »
Got this the other day:

Hiya hope your well wondered if you would be interested in making a fantasy a reality I've always had this fantasy where I take a hot girl out as almost like a gf and she pulls and flirts with other guys infront of me and my eventually pulls a black guy and one thing leads to another or if that's not your cup of tea perhaps you and a black guy and m b I got made to watch?

The guy had lots of positive feedback, but I can't get around the feeling that this was a copy and paste job...

ladyinred

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Re: How not to book an escort,world championships!
« Reply #9583 on: 10 July 2016, 12:20:43 am »
Got this the other day:

Hiya hope your well wondered if you would be interested in making a fantasy a reality I've always had this fantasy where I take a hot girl out as almost like a gf and she pulls and flirts with other guys infront of me and my eventually pulls a black guy and one thing leads to another or if that's not your cup of tea perhaps you and a black guy and m b I got made to watch?

The guy had lots of positive feedback, but I can't get around the feeling that this was a copy and paste job...

I got the same email ....

curvywench

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Re: How not to book an escort,world championships!
« Reply #9584 on: 10 July 2016, 01:25:36 am »
How much to shoot my muck on your face..It will be a long wank!!! no reply from me
The bigger, the better...In everything..Freddie Mercury