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Author Topic: How not to book an escort,world championships!  (Read 2664830 times)

River

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Re: How not to book an escort,world championships!
« Reply #3180 on: 14 August 2012, 08:59:54 pm »
Quote from: BBW_Sexy_Desires on 06 August 2012, 09:18:34 am
"Hi Girl, I'm a coke dealer and am in your area so if you get any Clients that want some Coke just Text this number....."
I text them the number of my apparent dealer...
which happens to be the main distribution number for Coca-Cola UK!  ;D
« Last Edit: 24 January 2017, 05:49:43 pm by River »
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ilovedots

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Re: How not to book an escort,world championships!
« Reply #3181 on: 14 August 2012, 10:48:10 pm »
Quote from: natasha on 12 August 2012, 02:29:47 pm
Maybe you could keep me in your drawer with the other bras or panties sometime too.

What a lunatic  :D

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Yes, I'd risk it for a biscuit, as I said, you know me.

reneesme

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Re: How not to book an escort,world championships!
« Reply #3182 on: 14 August 2012, 11:40:13 pm »
they are out in force tonight
Him " hiya, how are you?"
me " hi Im good thanks, how can I help you?"
Him " so what's your address and I'll pop round"
me " I am sorry but I have finished for the night"
Him and this is brilliant " ARE YOU SURE?"
DEAR LORD.............
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Ruby Reid And Alex

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Re: How not to book an escort,world championships!
« Reply #3183 on: 15 August 2012, 10:58:18 am »
Text we received at 2:15AM a few nights ago:

"Cud u cum to [town outside our outcall range] for an hour for 100 quid? X"

Hmm, sure sounds tempting to drag ourselves over 20 miles at 2AM for less than our incall fee...
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sarahyorks

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Re: How not to book an escort,world championships!
« Reply #3184 on: 15 August 2012, 11:30:55 am »
'I am genuine and I will show up, honest!' from a guy with no feedback, and linked and admitted from a profile from a known timewaster
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improbablecats

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Re: How not to book an escort,world championships!
« Reply #3185 on: 15 August 2012, 12:55:07 pm »
Idiot: (at 7.30pm) Hi, I want an outcall right now to X.

Me: Hi, I'm only available until 6 and I don't do outcalls to private residences. Also I don't take same-day bookings so you'll need to give me a day's notice.

Idiot: Okay.

Idiot: (at 3am) What about an outcall now?
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improbablecats

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Re: How not to book an escort,world championships!
« Reply #3186 on: 15 August 2012, 12:57:00 pm »
Quote from: JodieTs on 14 August 2012, 08:59:54 pm
Quote from: BBW_Sexy_Desires on 06 August 2012, 09:18:34 am
"Hi Girl, I'm a coke dealer and am in your area so if you get any Clients that want some Coke just Text this number....."
I just say that I'm a serving police officer with access to the evidence locker
and as such I get a selection of drugs for free.

I also ask if there are any outstanding warrants against him... ;D

Jodie, I love you.  ;D
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DianaMurphy

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Re: How not to book an escort,world championships!
« Reply #3187 on: 15 August 2012, 05:01:29 pm »
Text just received: "Yo..x"  :FF
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casey_kisses

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Re: How not to book an escort,world championships!
« Reply #3188 on: 15 August 2012, 05:29:17 pm »
Quote from: DianaMurphy on 15 August 2012, 05:01:29 pm
Text just received: "Yo..x"  :FF

LOL I'd text back saying 'yea, blud?!'

xx
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Happiness can be found, even in the darkest of times, if one only remembers to turn on the light.
- Albus Dumbledore

DianaMurphy

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Re: How not to book an escort,world championships!
« Reply #3189 on: 15 August 2012, 05:34:21 pm »
Quote from: casey_kisses on 15 August 2012, 05:29:17 pm
Quote from: DianaMurphy on 15 August 2012, 05:01:29 pm
Text just received: "Yo..x"  :FF

LOL I'd text back saying 'yea, blud?!'

xx

I was bored and did reply! LOL! I got a reply of "who's that?" Delete!!! I've just been updating directory listings etc so they'll be a heap more to come along those lines yet!
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ilovedots

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Re: How not to book an escort,world championships!
« Reply #3190 on: 15 August 2012, 05:57:26 pm »
 My favourite text today:

"I have a hard cock, will you stand on it.. no sex..x how much."

And a phonecall from a guy who sounded extremely erm... drunk:

Phone rings, I answer

Me: hello

Him: I want details

Me: What would you like to know?

Him: How much and what do you do?

Me: Please read my page again.

Him: The internet isn't working.

Me: Ok, what services would you like to receive then?

Him: (shouting) I'm asking you! What do you do and how much?!!!!

Me: *puts the phone down*

 ::)

I am not patient these days...

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Yes, I'd risk it for a biscuit, as I said, you know me.

sarahyorks

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Re: How not to book an escort,world championships!
« Reply #3191 on: 15 August 2012, 06:03:34 pm »
Quote from: ilovedots on 15 August 2012, 05:57:26 pm

I am not patient these days...

LMAO, neither am I
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VioletteUK

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    • Cassandra Deville
Re: How not to book an escort,world championships!
« Reply #3192 on: 15 August 2012, 06:26:13 pm »
Quote from: ilovedots on 15 August 2012, 05:57:26 pm
My favourite text today:

"I have a hard cock, will you stand on it.. no sex..x how much."

And a phonecall from a guy who sounded extremely erm... drunk:

Phone rings, I answer

Me: hello

Him: I want details

Me: What would you like to know?

Him: How much and what do you do?

Me: Please read my page again.

Him: The internet isn't working.

Me: Ok, what services would you like to receive then?

Him: (shouting) I'm asking you! What do you do and how much?!!!!

Me: *puts the phone down*

 ::)

I am not patient these days...
You lasted longer than me. I would have told him to f off, after the rude request for details.
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ilovedots

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Re: How not to book an escort,world championships!
« Reply #3193 on: 15 August 2012, 08:52:40 pm »
Quote from: VioletteUK on 15 August 2012, 06:26:13 pm
You lasted longer than me. I would have told him to f off, after the rude request for details.

After reading a thread about myself on a punter forum, where a bunch of poor sods complained that I put the phone down on them all the time, I am trying to show a bit more patience, but it ain't easy, I must say  ;D

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Yes, I'd risk it for a biscuit, as I said, you know me.

casey_kisses

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Re: How not to book an escort,world championships!
« Reply #3194 on: 15 August 2012, 09:04:25 pm »
Quote from: ilovedots on 15 August 2012, 08:52:40 pm
Quote from: VioletteUK on 15 August 2012, 06:26:13 pm
You lasted longer than me. I would have told him to f off, after the rude request for details.

After reading a thread about myself on a punter forum, where a bunch of poor sods complained that I put the phone down on them all the time, I am trying to show a bit more patience, but it ain't easy, I must say  ;D



Well that's easily fixable... don't read the punter forums  ;)

xx
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Happiness can be found, even in the darkest of times, if one only remembers to turn on the light.
- Albus Dumbledore
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