I've had some belters over the last couple of weeks including one who kept emailing me on aw and asking whereabouts I'm based in my town (I live in a small town that it takes 20 minutes at the most to drive from one end to the other - I'm not giving my address!) despite him asking for my number, me giving it and telling him several times to call me if he wanted a booking.

So, tonight's gem including all abbrieviations.
text from him: Hi redhead r u workin tommoz baby x
Me: Call me if you want (text wasn't received until a couple of hours later and I was sleepy)
Him: U still in nantwich (My aw profile has no mention of Nantwich???)
Him: U call me no credit
Me: I've never been in Nantwich, I'm in *town*. Are you sure you've got the right girl? And it's up to you to call me (I was sleepy and couldn't be bothered going into it)
Him: Im after sum lady 2 give me good time babe tommoz am xx
Him: I tried sumone in nantwich never came back x ( still doesn't explain how Nantwich comes into this)
Him: R u about tommoz am xx
Me: Are you near a computer?
Him: I was my sot  im in bed can u c me in morn xx
Him: My son got it i mean sorry x
H: any good 2 u text me your addy xx (!!!)
H: I wil b there xx
Me: If you're serious about booking me, call me or book me on aw. I will need to know what time tomorrow, incall or outcall, how long you'd like to book me for, and that you have fully read my profile.
H: Incall my name is *TW* and im defo on 4 seeing u in the morning i can only get on computer wen my family out and that not goin happen soon enough i defo cum tommoz early am xx u up 4 it xx
H: Im no timewaster tel me ad and time i b there promise u xx
H: Wife comin home shortly text me quickly baby xx
H: Omg wish id got a bit of credit only got texts baby sory xx
H: Im serious babe text me please xx
H: Or call me now i give u money 4 call tommoz xx
He then calls me from a witheld number, telling me it's his work phone. I tell him to read my profile and do what it says.
H: Wil u b available early am i wil get credit on my phone in morning and ring u wot time u availabl xx

So far, no more texts. I can only presume his wife came home 

Woke up to this gem in my AW inbox -

'How do I know I won't catch a disease off anybody on this site?'

Ummm

Quote from: Mellow on 23 January 2012, 11:36:19 am

So my first contact of the week I get a text .......

Hey babe, any chance of a hlf hour booking for sixty?

*****big yawn*****

I see nothing wrong with this but only because that is (albeit the lower end) or what I do charge for 30 mins. Suppose it depends where youre based and stuff as to hourly rate.

If you charged a quid an hour, they'd try for 50p 

I think it's a combination of straight-forward haggling and wanting to be 'special', with their 'special discount' that none of the others get.

Moron Mondays anyone?

So slow day only broken by TWs and a cancelled appointment.  Then I get a call, seems usual enough at first then the guy says:

Do you see couples and do you mind who she is in relation to me?

So I say I'd need to speak to hear to ensure everything was ok with her.  He's very reluctant to say who it was, I have to drag it out of him and finally he says'

Its my aunt

So my first instinct was..........fantasist so I told him that he was a fantasist and a TW, he denied it (well I guess he may not have been) and I ended by saying in anycase even if it was for real I wouldn't be comfortable with it.

Aaaaaaagh I give up on today.