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Author Topic: How not to book an escort,world championships!  (Read 2591855 times)

Lushblossom

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Re: How not to book an escort,world championships!
« Reply #13860 on: 01 September 2020, 08:07:40 am »
Nervous first timer enquires yesterday about a booking.  Won't give his name!  I said I can't agree to meeting somebody without a name ....  What a nerd!
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Liverpoolgal123

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  • Posts: 79
Re: How not to book an escort,world championships!
« Reply #13861 on: 02 September 2020, 12:34:18 am »
Good looking regular: “fancy a freebie if your quiet?”
Me: “I’m more or less booked up today but I wouldn’t give a freebie anyway”
Now slightly less good looking ex regular: “ ah come on, you enjoy it more than me ha ha”
Me: BLOCKED
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CelesteManchester

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  • Posts: 737
Re: How not to book an escort,world championships!
« Reply #13862 on: 02 September 2020, 01:06:08 am »
Quote from: Liverpoolgal123 on 02 September 2020, 12:34:18 am
Good looking regular: “fancy a freebie if your quiet?”
Me: “I’m more or less booked up today but I wouldn’t give a freebie anyway”
Now slightly less good looking ex regular: “ ah come on, you enjoy it more than me ha ha”
Me: BLOCKED

Do they do this on purpose? Are they trying to piss us off? This guy just fucked himself 90 ways to Sunday....smh.
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An American on a British site, still learning the slang😉

Liverpoolgal123

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Re: How not to book an escort,world championships!
« Reply #13863 on: 02 September 2020, 06:58:55 am »
Quote from: CelesteManchester on 02 September 2020, 01:06:08 am
Do they do this on purpose? Are they trying to piss us off? This guy just fucked himself 90 ways to Sunday....smh.
Does my head in, felt like telling the truth that I fake the whole lot with him. Might be good looking but doesn’t know his arse from his elbow when it comes to giving real pleasure, thinks banging away fast with no foreplay does the job
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Liverpoolgal123

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Re: How not to book an escort,world championships!
« Reply #13864 on: 02 September 2020, 07:10:40 am »
Semi regular At 10AM: what time you free from today
Me: After 5pm love
Semi reg: it’s 10AM and your telling me to get back at you at 5! (loads of laughing faces as he thinks I’m taking the piss)
Me: I don’t actually start till 12.30 and I have two 2 hour bookings
Now blocked semi reg: fucken hell 2 2 hour bookings ye don’t even wanna come after that ha ha ha

Blocked him after that cheeky fucker, funny thing is is that he normally likes to be my last client of the day so he can take the piss and stay over the time he’s booked knowing no one is turning up so usually he sees me after about 5 clients never mind just 2, his loss anyway! Pain in the arse always looking for discounts and wouldn’t leave when time was up
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fallen angel

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Re: How not to book an escort,world championships!
« Reply #13865 on: 02 September 2020, 08:24:16 am »
Quote from: Liverpoolgal123 on 02 September 2020, 06:58:55 am
Does my head in, felt like telling the truth that I fake the whole lot with him. Might be good looking but doesn’t know his arse from his elbow when it comes to giving real pleasure, thinks banging away fast with no foreplay does the job

We should be charging his type more.. way too much wear and tear!
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Snow Whitest

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  • Posts: 307
Re: How not to book an escort,world championships!
« Reply #13866 on: 02 September 2020, 07:28:30 pm »
Via Text

TW 1
Him:
Hey *My Name* you English

Me: I'm British, which I would have thought was obvious from my profile

Him:
You is well fit

Me:
*deep sigh and block*

TW 2 via Whatsapp (which bugs me anyway as I ask clients to message not bloody Whatsapp)

Him:
Heyyyy

Me:
Really? Do I know you?

Him:
I may have the wrong number

Me:
If you want a booking you probably need to mention it?

Him:
What's your name on there again

Me:
Didn't you contact me?

Him:
Yeah I've forgot it

Me:
Even deeper sigh and block
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“Before you diagnose yourself with depression or low self-esteem, first make sure that you are not, in fact, just surrounded by arseholes.” Sigmund Freud”

Snow Whitest

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Re: How not to book an escort,world championships!
« Reply #13867 on: 02 September 2020, 07:32:02 pm »
Oh and this classic whilst I was out with my mother..

Via email
Hi can you do 30 minute incall please as soon as possible I am just leaving Southampton I’m on the M27

Me: I only work to my time sorry and if you wanted that short notice why email and not call or text?
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“Before you diagnose yourself with depression or low self-esteem, first make sure that you are not, in fact, just surrounded by arseholes.” Sigmund Freud”

CelesteManchester

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Re: How not to book an escort,world championships!
« Reply #13868 on: 02 September 2020, 11:41:33 pm »
Quote from: Snow Whitest on 02 September 2020, 07:32:02 pm
Oh and this classic whilst I was out with my mother..

Via email
Hi can you do 30 minute incall please as soon as possible I am just leaving Southampton I’m on the M27

Me: I only work to my time sorry and if you wanted that short notice why email and not call or text?

Snowy ~

I turn this around on them pretty effectively lol, when they try & pull this shit on me.

*Talk talk* So when would you like to see me?

Now.

Ahh. Ok, so ... 5 minutes?

Uhhh, no. 25?

That’s not what you SAID. You said NOW.

Well I  ummm I’m errr driving & ummmm...

Don’t ask me for now. I WILL say yes. I’ll be in trouble if anyone actually calls my bluff😆😆.
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An American on a British site, still learning the slang😉

fallen angel

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Re: How not to book an escort,world championships!
« Reply #13869 on: 03 September 2020, 08:02:54 am »
Quote from: CelesteManchester on 02 September 2020, 11:41:33 pm
Snowy ~

I turn this around on them pretty effectively lol, when they try & pull this shit on me.

*Talk talk* So when would you like to see me?

Now.

Ahh. Ok, so ... 5 minutes?

Uhhh, no. 25?

That’s not what you SAID. You said NOW.

Well I  ummm I’m errr driving & ummmm...

Don’t ask me for now. I WILL say yes. I’ll be in trouble if anyone actually calls my bluff😆😆.

Oh the  "Are you available now?"  My pet hate!  :FF

Me :  Oh so you're outside?  ( even though they have no idea where I live yet)

Him : Errrr well no.....

What is the point!?
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Caledonia

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Re: How not to book an escort,world championships!
« Reply #13870 on: 04 September 2020, 10:27:20 am »
Quote from: Liverpoolgal123 on 02 September 2020, 12:34:18 am
Good looking regular: “fancy a freebie if your quiet?”

Why of course it makes complete sense to give someone a freebie when you've been quite and therefore not making money 🤦‍♀️🤦‍♀️ Seriously if they had a brain they'd be dangerous.
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Lushblossom

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Re: How not to book an escort,world championships!
« Reply #13871 on: 04 September 2020, 11:13:00 am »
Yeh really good business move!
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hot flower

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Re: How not to book an escort,world championships!
« Reply #13872 on: 06 September 2020, 07:01:29 pm »
Quote from: Caledonia on 04 September 2020, 10:27:20 am
Why of course it makes complete sense to give someone a freebie when you've been quite and therefore not making money 🤦‍♀️🤦‍♀️ Seriously if they had a brain they'd be dangerous.
Yes you have better things to do with your time
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Caledonia

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Re: How not to book an escort,world championships!
« Reply #13873 on: 07 September 2020, 01:13:13 pm »
Quote from: hot flower on 06 September 2020, 07:01:29 pm
Yes you have better things to do with your time
Yep like washing my hair  ;D
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TheLastTime

  • Guest
Re: How not to book an escort,world championships!
« Reply #13874 on: 07 September 2020, 05:22:45 pm »
Dude rings up and makes an appt.

Then bizarre convo:

Him: Are you suntanned?

Me: You’ve seen my pics so...

Him: I think you are...

Me: Busted it’s obvious you don’t know who you are calling as I obviously am not suntanned...

Him: HANGS UP

Turns out he has oodles of spam reports which didn’t show up as the wifi is so crap here.
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