SAAFE forum
General Category => Blather and Babble => Topic started by: ladyofthemansion on 03 November 2019, 07:48:47 pm
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Sex simply does not interest me anymore. Must be my age. When it comes to work I just get on with going through the motion. Am I the only one?
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Bingo! Hi there, that’s me. :) 85% sure I’m asexual as it just doesn’t do anything for me. The money is the only reason I ever have sex. Even in my personal life it just doesn’t appeal. That’s probably sharing too much, but hey ho - that’s the truth. I’m fine with it. If anything I feel it makes this job easier in a way... xx
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Same! The very few times I've had civvy sex I'm thinking, "I usually get paid XYZ amount for this..."
& then I get annoyed with myself lol.
There's ONE guy I'm interested in & I can't get him to give me the time of day. I finally find someone who's great in the sack & he's busier than I am. He claims. Okkkk Mike.
Definitely going thru the motions these days.
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;D civvy for free nope...less than 0
atm even paid less than 0! ::having orgasm is cool, btm lol i won t it even if i get paid!
change! ahahah
???
i do not know if civvy lady are soo interested in sex daily! i got doubts!
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My sex drive is the same if not more the older I get, it all depends on the type of client with me though, I'm always trying to teach them :D
Private sex drive though, exceptionally good! ;D
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No, despite being menopausal I still love sex (assuming the bloke is half decent). My libido/urge has diminished, but then it used to be off the scale just before and after a period, so that's actually a relief. Once I actually start having it though, all good. Perhaps a slight change for me is that sometimes I'm less interested in foreplay, but I always love the PIV bit!
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I am probably strange. I can only enjoy non paid sex if I am in Love with the guy and relationship where my real self comes out natural feminine juices. Otherwise I can survive with no sex. I must get paid to tolerate it most times I am switched off faking it and using lots of lube.
If I am not in love no feelings then pay up. No Money - No Honey.
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I am probably strange. I can only enjoy non paid sex if I am in Love with the guy and relationship where my real self comes out natural feminine juices. Otherwise I can survive with no sex. I must get paid to tolerate it most times I am switched off faking it and using lots of lube.
If I am not in love no feelings then pay up. No Money - No Honey.
I’m exactly the same. I don’t have one night stands, the only one I ever have was many years ago and I was so drunk I had to be told it had even happened. I have no recollection of the guy or how it even happened. I don’t enjoy sex unless I have feelings for the person. I can fake it for the money, but you could stick some gorgeous guy who is amazing in bed in front of me and I’d be like, nah I’m good thanks. I have no labido at all unless I have the feels, and then I can’t get enough and want to do everything
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I lost my libido through being ill this is now returning, and pleasantly excited by the prospect - prior to this I had blamed it on (a) age and (b) having regular sex. Now do remember I'm a low volume business, and my partner is older/drive waning so when I say regular sex for the last 4-5 years it's been on average 3 or 4 client bookings a week plus perhaps 1-2 times personal life.
By the way very happy with that frequency and I wasn't aware how much was general health related, until I started to recently feel better. Only problem is that my period is likely to return as my health improves.....double edged sword :-\ ;D
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I am probably strange. I can only enjoy non paid sex if I am in Love with the guy and relationship where my real self comes out natural feminine juices. Otherwise I can survive with no sex. I must get paid to tolerate it most times I am switched off faking it and using lots of lube.
If I am not in love no feelings then pay up. No Money - No Honey.
+1 +1 +1 :angel:
Trouble is men always disappoint me in a non sexual way so it's very, very rare that I'm even remotely interested these days.
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I'm not anti-sex but always wondered why sex is so popular! Sex for cash is the only time I'm interested. I'm a perv, so sex isn't my main interest. I know it's not PC, but most days I'm not a fan of genitals whether mine or others.
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I can’t remember the last time I enjoyed or actually wanted to have sex with someone who wasn’t paying for it.
I have to really like someone to want to have sex with them - I do miss that, but then on the other hand, I don’t like the part when the relationship ends. Being single is so much less risky, I’d rather not have any heartache again.
I can do without sex, and at work I’m just going through the motions.
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I prefer sex for payment as when sex is for free to my mind it loses the thrill lol.
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I’m exactly the same. I don’t have one night stands, the only one I ever have was many years ago and I was so drunk I had to be told it had even happened. I have no recollection of the guy or how it even happened. I don’t enjoy sex unless I have feelings for the person. I can fake it for the money, but you could stick some gorgeous guy who is amazing in bed in front of me and I’d be like, nah I’m good thanks. I have no labido at all unless I have the feels, and then I can’t get enough and want to do everything
I am the same as you. We are so alike hahah x
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I'm not anti-sex but always wondered why sex is so popular! Sex for cash is the only time I'm interested. I'm a perv, so sex isn't my main interest. I know it's not PC, but most days I'm not a fan of genitals whether mine or others.
ahah always laughing! you are sooo funny!
btw yes, i always found that it is not really aesthetic! ... not just c** but i mean even my p**
i never understood why i found it not nice! i was thinking that was my problem...crazyness or some mental thing! ::)
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I've been an escort for nearly half my life now, so it's getting hard to compare but I do enjoy sex with most of my clients. Earning money for my skills is a huge aphrodisiac for me though and I've gotten quite accustomed to having a lot of PIV in a day. I feel normal at the end of the day, but if I go more than a day or two without working, my body certainly lets me know.
My private sex life is much different, because I like to be taken care of and take it slow. I am (almost) always interested. We usually take care of each other in the morning when we both have lots of energy and before I start my regular work for the day. That's almost always my favorite time, but some of my clients test that.
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I'm the opposite, more interested in the sex than the money! ;D I'm just a hornbag who gets off on sex with strangers. I think it's a fetish of mine! Also completely fascinated by other people's fetishes.
That's why I offer a kinky PSE service because I get well frustrated by the GFE hand holding and talking...😪😪
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Money.
Sex, good or bad is still just sex. Now money on the other hand never disappoints! :D
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I prefer sex for payment as when sex is for free to my mind it loses the thrill lol.
this is me. its part of the thrill.
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My work sex is my only sex and has been for such a long time. Not sure if or when that may change. I used to have a lot of casual civvy sex many years past and I think I enjoyed the thrill of it more than the actual sex.
Same with paid sex, I enjoy it because I have just added to the coffers! I do not crave sex outside the job so suppose the answer is no I am not really interested in sex except for the money (at present anyway).
So many clients have asked me do I have loads of sex even when I am not working. I wink and tell them not to be nosy. It amuses me to think these men assume because I am a sex worker I must be horny 24/7 every day. Not a chance.
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I keep my civvy sex and work sex seperated in my mind and heart. I enjoy both for different rewards.
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I keep my civvy sex and work sex seperated in my mind and heart. I enjoy both for different rewards.
I do the same and I find it to be very emotionally and mentally helpful.
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I'm not particularly interested in sex. It's been worse since I've had the implant; I'd rather have a cup of coffee.
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I thought the sex wouldn't be enjoyed while escorting because I am the opposite in my personal life.
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I have never in my whole life had an orgasm through penetration, and I have had a couple of orgasms through oral since I was 16, I am 34 now. I can only really come through wanking, so I don't see the point in adding another notch to my bedpost, I'm literally doing it for them because I get no pleasure out of it.
When I have a relationship, I'll fall in love etc and I will literally dread the part when we have sex because I always seem to get guys who want to have sex a lot, I fake all my orgasms with work and at home.
I'm single now and I love it, I've not had civvy sex in over a year.
There's no point not faking and trying to show them what to do, because I have tried that with a few people and it just doesn't work.
I really enjoy masturbating watching porn and having orgasms by myself though! I'd love to be able to come through sex. But I can't, so I don't bother.
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Whilst working the way I was (4 days a month cramming in as many as possible) I had no interest in sex outside of work. Now I’ve taken a step back and doing way less and only outcalls, I’m interested again. Funny how it goes but now I want casual sex and enjoy the fact I get to choose who with (as in looks) and be picky about it. It’s refreshing and reset my whole sex life.
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I always find the more sex I have, the more I want. Its like an alcoholic with booze I guess.
If I dont have any for ages, on a break etc then I can kind of forget about it and it doesnt bother me. Quite happy without it turns out, just cant masturbate because that makes me crave sex again!
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I am very dominant with clients and submissive with sexual partners out side of the job so for me the sex in both is completely different. I am not sure until I leave escorting how my sex drive would be. When you have a child a dog and a load of clients to see each week where is the time for a private sex life. I mainly participate in having sex for myself with long term fuck buddied when I’m out drinking which is also not very often.
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I'm not particularly interested in sex. It's been worse since I've had the implant; I'd rather have a cup of coffee.
A good reason for not using a hormone based method of birth control.
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The only person I have sex with, when it isn't for money, is my partner. I still masturbate also, sometimes between bookings when I have got close but not actually cum. Eventhough my partner wouldn't mind me hooking up with someone else in civvy life, it just doesn't have any appeal to me. Like I could get paid for it, why give it away to someone I'm not in love with? And some sex I have with my clients is amazing.
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I feel so lucky and so blessed, because I have no problems to cum with clients ;) I am not talking about guys, who just come for oral or other activity to pleasure themselves, but full GFE bookings..Even if I see that I will not cum because of their lack of attention to the right spots, if I am in the right mood, I just do it myself and they love to watch and or feel that yes she came. Never in my life faked an orgasm. It happens, or it doesn’t happen and clients usually ok if not. I used to be shy before to fully get off with some of them, not anymore:) why not have money and pleasure at once hehe...Cumming with clients makes me motivated in business too, because what other job pays off as good and ... gives you some pleasure? x
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I'm usually sorting out my bills in my head when shagging a client. I also tell them I don't orgasm as that is too personal for me. I'm not faking it - no one gets to see my orgasm face even faked. Only get near when loved up with someone - and even then it's difficult for me.
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Would rather use my vibrator than fuck for free. :angel:
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I get enjoyment out of both kinds of sex
If I’m honest properly more enjoyment out of paid sex as I don’t accept all booking and tend to only accept booking with men who I think I have more off a connection with
I currently don’t have a partner and I’ve parked my AW profile, must admit that I’m really missing the touch of a man
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I'm usually sorting out my bills in my head when shagging a client. I also tell them I don't orgasm as that is too personal for me. I'm not faking it - no one gets to see my orgasm face even faked. Only get near when loved up with someone - and even then it's difficult for me.
I was working my shopping list the other day. ;D
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I was working my shopping list the other day. ;D
😁
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My sex drive is dead too. I'm worried that sex work ruined it and I'll never get it back.
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I love casual sex and dislike monogamous relationships (and am yet to find someone who can genuinely handle an open relationship) so this job is perfect for me. I get my oats without having to get involved with them. I think sex with strangers is a bit of a fetish of mine. That's why I started escorting for the thrill.
The money is a bonus too but I dont need much to live a good life so I appreciate the freedom to explore my other passions that only having to work a couple of days a week gives me.
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I see the sex as work. I don't get much out of it personally but it also doesn't bother me too much most the time.
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Early 20s here, yes I have zero sexual feelings and interest in guys who pay me for it, only feel arousal with the boyfriend who I actually chose and feel attraction to. Apart from that, no interest in sex or other guys.
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Money.
Sex, good or bad is still just sex. Now money on the other hand never disappoints! :D
;D ;D ;D ;D ;D ;D ;D ;D
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The Money is the main reason I do this job BUT I do also enjoy the sex, not with every client but I’ve enjoyed having sex with some clients More than I have with boyfriends in the past. I never particularly enjoyed sex before I started escorting, it was basically all for my partners, when they did try to pleasure me I always felt like they was just doing it as it was expected but really they wanted for it to be “their turn” but with clients I’m more turned on knowing they actually WANT for you to enjoy yourself, they are paying so they could just use the time all for their pleasure I find I can lay back and actually enjoy oral on me knowing they want to do it (some even love doing it) and it’s not just getting done as it’s expected in a relationship. I haven’t had sex outside of work since becoming an escort so I’m hoping my new attitude towards sex stays with me if/when I do have a relationship.
Thought I should add that before I started working I had never had an orgasm with a man only by myself but in the year and a half I’ve been an escort I’ve enjoyed myself quite a few times ;D
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The Money is the main reason I do this job BUT I do also enjoy the sex, not with every client but I’ve enjoyed having sex with some clients More than I have with boyfriends in the past. I never particularly enjoyed sex before I started escorting, it was basically all for my partners, when they did try to pleasure me I always felt like they was just doing it as it was expected but really they wanted for it to be “their turn” but with clients I’m more turned on knowing they actually WANT for you to enjoy yourself, they are paying so they could just use the time all for their pleasure I find I can lay back and actually enjoy oral on me knowing they want to do it (some even love doing it) and it’s not just getting done as it’s expected in a relationship. I haven’t had sex outside of work since becoming an escort so I’m hoping my new attitude towards sex stays with me if/when I do have a relationship.
Thought I should add that before I started working I had never had an orgasm with a man only by myself but in the year and a half I’ve been an escort I’ve enjoyed myself quite a few times ;D
This was me until 18 months in, now I know it can be achieved I can pass that on to partners including clients/punters.
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I don't think I'm as bothered as I used to be. Although some clients I can cum and enjoy myself with.
It's so much better when it's in my private life with someone I love or really like, although that rarely happens for me these days.
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clients I’m more turned on knowing they actually WANT for you to enjoy yourself, they are paying so they could just use the time all for their pleasure I find I can lay back and actually enjoy oral on me knowing they want to do it (some even love doing it)
So true and civvie girlfriends just don't believe it. I love receiving oral and have a great range of pervy fantasies to use to make me orgasm. using a blindfold really helps.
However, like others have said, I don't really have the urge to have sex. Haven't had an orgasm for months since lock down and I'm only just starting to think about it ( a few dreams). Once I get going I really enjoy it and feel exhilarated afterwards...Just writing this is making me miss it!
[quote fixed - please don't delete these]
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I am so glad that I'm not the only one. I haven't ever really enjoyed sex, and have only ever really done it for the money. My exes have always criticised me for not 'putting out enough,' but I don't like doing it for free... :-X I see it as a bit of a chore...
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I've found with men I rarely enjoy sex and my preference is for female company in my private life
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Sex ? out of context its not interesting at all.... boring indeed messy and all that, however with the right person that pushes my buttons... its ok going on good.
personal i know what I want and i dont put up with selfish lovers. if your in it for yourself then im not interested, you'd better not cum and fall asleep... like to be held, and like the smell of aftershave and fresh sweat. a feeling of being filled while held.. my hands in his hair. i made use of doing this and worked out the things that work for me and what I like and god knows with the right guy im interested. brian from accounts that hardly does anything outside of work and id guess likes to train spot its his hour as hes paid me and ill do what he wants. but when im with my partner he better be good and do his thing. the money makes brian interesting lol
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Sex for money only :)
I'm in menopause so i get very aroused but not all the time . I can switch off when I want with escorting.
With partners in the past I used to have to keep performing like it's a duty I didn't enjoy it and that was pre menopause..
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Same here. I only truly enjoy it with a boyfriend that I am actually attracted to. The paid Sex is good though since we get a direct tangible benefit out of it.
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I used to have this thing, where I'd be deliberately boring in bed with partners incase they guessed that I was a whore... >:D ;D
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Sex Only for money. I have no interest in sex anymore at all, especially after what I have had a chance to observe during my escorting.
We escorts have " a chance " ( not necessary pleasant ) to see what usual women will never see or hear ( good for them)
Escorting made me completely loosing an interest in sex and also in men .
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I used to have this thing, where I'd be deliberately boring in bed with partners incase they guessed that I was a whore... >:D ;D
I was bad at blow jobs to be on the safe side incase they wondered how I did need to use flavour gels each time !
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I used to have this thing, where I'd be deliberately boring in bed with partners in case they guessed that I was a whore... >:D ;D
That's quite funny, but it's also a real possibility worth remembering. I've been very careful how adventurous I get because it would be a dead giveaway. I find particularly I have to slow things down quite a lot with non-clients. Fortunately they are few and far between these days.
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I find giving free sex really isn't appealing at all. It takes all the fun out of it!
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I find giving free sex really isn't appealing at all. It takes all the fun out of it!
Last time I did it, which is quite a while back, I felt a bit cheated. Which I didn't ever feel before. I still like it, but being paid makes it feel more complete.
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I could quite happily not have sex forever. Been saying that for years now but last year I met a guy I was with for two months and I suddenly perked up and couldn't get enough of it. Unfortunately he had type 1 diabetes so couldn't get a hard on. 😠
I think it changes when you meet someone you fancy but also us older women are lacking in testosterone which is why we go off it. I think if I'd have stayed with him I would have got bored of it.
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Even before I started this work over 25 years ago I thought there are only 2 reasons to have sex. 1 for money and 2. if you love him/her.
From the first I get money which I need plus orgasms which is something civvies don't get in their paid work. ;D
From the second I get orgasms plus my soulmate and best friend. :)
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My periods finally stopped this spring as since then have gone off sex. That said I can enjoy it when I get it but not seeking it outside work whatsoever.
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I'm not interested in *only* sex, so all the blokes who before were throwing their cocks around talking about their prowess are now cancelled. It is often the first way men approach me and I have no interest in it at ALL! Now I am looking for a practical Mormon type or maybe an Orthodox Jew, old fashioned, take me out to eat and kiss me before we part at the end of the date kind of energy.
I did however see a guy who claimed both prowess and being charming and fun. He was neither, complete shit in bed and then all he did was fuss about his house, he didn't buy me any food and then snuck down and ate something on his own. It was....horrible...If I saw him again it would be too soon.
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I used to love sex with randoms but now find that my criteria for non paying partners is exceptionally high to the point where virtually no guy will qualify ... So I guess that's a no from me :-\
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I used to love sex with randoms but now find that my criteria for non paying partners is exceptionally high to the point where virtually no guy will qualify ... So I guess that's a no from me :-\
^^This^^
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It is a mixture for me if they are good in bed I enjoy but mostly everypenny counts.
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I find this job totally desensitised me to males in general, and especially to those encountered in the civvy life. I literally have zero interest in them, they can disappear tomorrow, and the sexual things don’t excite me any more the way civvies get excited about it. In the daily life, I don’t have much exposure to them except punting, work and shops/restaurants. I treat them like air otherwise and they have to pay me for me to bother with them. I don’t engage in any sex chat unless the comms are to do with making the booking.
(Yes I’ve been let down and heart broken many many times)
Anyone relates?
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Yes.
I like to think sex work keeps me under control!
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Sort of, but it comes and goes with me, and it's not the only factor. Up until 2.5 years ago, when I was in Herts, I was still doing a lot of unpaid shagging. But then I had a perfect storm of relocating 200 miles, menopause and an insane civvy work schedule, which is still having an impact, and I've only had two FWBs in that time (on top of doing hardly any bookings). Down the line I might look for more, but at the moment I just don't have the time or inclination.
That said, I think it was my experiences of online dating that affected my overall opinion of men more than whoring.
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Yes.
I like to think sex work keeps me under control!
I don't feel like I need to be under control. But it certainly helps with keeping the civvies at bay. I get all I need from work sex, and I don't feel any need any more to deviate from that, notwithstanding the past six months.
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Genuinely how many women on SAAFE do this job for sex? I believe that there are none!
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Genuinely how many women on SAAFE do this job for sex? I believe that there are none!
Don't be so sure. When I first started I was curious about it and I thought it was a good excuse to have a lot of sex without anyone thinking I was crazy about it. I was young at the time, and the novelty did wear off eventually. But I think everyone has their own reasons and they can be wildly different. That applies to most aspects of life I find.
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Genuinely how many women on SAAFE do this job for sex? I believe that there are none!
No, it is definitely part of why I do it, but I'm mature and very low volume.
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Money only for me, not interested in sex. All sorts of things run through my mind when I’m with a punter and none are to do with sex. Somehow, I manage not to show this & can switch when I’m working but that’s it ::)
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Money only for me, not interested in sex. All sorts of things run through my mind when I’m with a punter and none are to do with sex. Somehow, I manage not to show this & can switch when I’m working but that’s it ::)
Totally agree with this. My mind flits around from everything once the booking is underway..
Can I get away abit earlier? If so, do I stop for petrol/nip to Aldi/the gym? (do I have my headphones though?)
A swim would be better, this guy is sweaty/full of bloody Lynx (don't want others to smell it) OK, so a shower at his? Would rather not/have I set to record Derron Brown tonight?
Rather hope this guy doesn't want full sex, he's abit big/What am I having for tea? So his money brings my weekly total to... Etc, etc.. ;D
I swear blind none of them have a clue 8)
It's little wonder that ten minutes after leaving, I can't remember a darn thing about the booking or the bloke himself (good job I make some notes in my phone after 5 ;))
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No, it is definitely part of why I do it, but I'm mature and very low volume.
But if the sex work paid normal wages then you wouldn’t be one, surely? Sure the sex partly is enjoyable for you but it’s still the money that motivates you too, surely?!😀
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After having incredibly bad sex for free with a guy I will now only have sex for money bad or good ..
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But if the sex work paid normal wages then you wouldn’t be one, surely? Sure the sex partly is enjoyable for you but it’s still the money that motivates you too, surely?!😀
Yes, that's why I said 'part' - I like the sex and the money and the social interaction.
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Yes, that's why I said 'part' - I like the sex and the money and the social interaction.
I feel the same way. Obviously we rely on the money to support our lifestyle and that's why we work, but frequent interaction is super important to me too. My body/hormones remind me of that whenever I try taking a break. As long as my clients are good/well-behaved, I do enjoy the variety, the otherwise forbidden men, and nearly unlimited, (mostly) worry free shags. It's not the worst job in the world. :)
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I truly do not like shagging clients and I’m surprised so many of you say that you don’t mind! We’re all different though!
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I don’t like it but don’t hate it or I wouldn’t do the job. I only enjoy sex mentally with some sort of connection love or sometimes lust. But I find very few men attractive in real life. I have a type that I don’t see in work I like. Also knowing a man would pay for sex puts me off having any connection because I can’t respect that as a quality I admire. But I think sex is different for meN they find it harder to get causally. If I did want a man for sex I’m sure I could get one easily from tinder or something and not have to pay anything. But if I was a man I don’t think I’d pay unless I was particularly unattractive in personality and looks meaning I couldn’t get any partners. Even then I’d probably wank rather that pay.
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I truly do not like shagging clients and I’m surprised so many of you say that you don’t mind! We’re all different though!
For me, when it is good, it's quite like masturbation, it is better than sexual frustration and you are getting paid for it, but not as good as sex with someone you are really into. That is also the case with boring sex too, I know a guy who is a quick repeater but OMG he is THE most boring lay ever, just so flamin unimaginative. So you might end up having sex with him three times in quick succession and even if you orgasm it is still unsatisfying because he is so boring. THAT is the kind of sex I won't have again unless I am paid for it because frankly, I could have as much of a good time on my own, that guy was offering me nothing better than a dildo that cleaned itself and put itself away.
He sometimes hits me up in my DMs and I am like....noooope!
It is definitely easier for me to get turned on and have fun the more attractive the client is to me but honestly, I would say that 85% of them or more I would never have sex with without being paid too and I enjoy a wide variety of sexual partners and types.