Hi, sorry but this is a bit of a rant 

So I've seen this client 3 times and so far so good. He did sent me a couple of text messages throught the weeks as in "Hi, how are you?" and expected me to engage but I didn't because 1) they were not going to lead to a booking and b) "how I am" is really none of his business. I don't engage in personal chit chat with clients between bookings as a way to keep boundaries. So he messages me yesterday inviting me for dinner because "he came to London for business and is alone, bored and I am so much fun", yet he doesn't want a booking, just to go out for dinner. I give him my rates for social. He gets completely outraged because I'm planning to charge him for a social outing and he's treating me for dinner. He says "I thought we got along". He doesn't understand that a) this is my job and b) he pays for "us to get along". This is a grown up man running his own successful business who doesn't seem to grasp reality. Needles to say the dinner didn't happen as I don't entertain clients for free. I don't want a client who doesn't understand boundaries so... good riddance, but I don't want to be rude to him.

How do you guys politely cut a client who doesn't understand boundaries? Do you have a specific script/etiquette you follow? thanks! ana

The problem is as most of these clients find us on adultwork it's set out mainly for full on sex acts and not advertised towards actual escorting so they think the escorting side is not paid for.

When i used to be on a couple of decent agencies that booked on time and no mention of how many sex acts in the hour i did get more clients that understood dinner dates are paid for. It was more you pay for my time and you probably get sex but things are different now and rather then escorting as such it's more sex worker now and only that.

I can see why this happens more now but i would just say i see clients on time and not on whether it's sex action or not.

The problem is so many of these men do not understand that we mainly only agree to see them for cash and cash only. Being honest there is probably only the very rare client that you would even consider going for dinner with if you was indeed going to.

I had a cheeky bastard client once that i had seen 3 times 3rd time he tried under paying. He asked for a long evening booking after how many backwards and forwards texts and calls not giving me the info i wanted of how long he wanted. All he kept saying was will book into a nice hotel with a nice restaurant...i was like ok and how long?

Eventually he came out with i was hoping make a night of it i will buy you a nice dinner and drinks and have a nice room. So i said so basically as your not giving me an answer your expecting like 6hrs or so at a discount right? He then said well i was hoping for a small donation. I said cut to the chase, i knew i was not going to this ridiculous proposition.

So eventually the cheapskate said i thought if i pay for the hotel, dinner and drinks that will be enough.

So he wanted 6 or 7 hours for free and shagging back in the room for some dinner and drinks.

I said to him you must think i was born yesterday, i do this job for money and i can buy my own dinner and drinks out of work when i want. So then i said best you move on as not interested in continuing this coversation.

I had a client who after he had paid for a few one hour bookings then started trying to push for something more. The usual we get on so well let's go out for this and that no mention of payment. I start suggesting dating sites and he comes back with the "but I like you". i say i don't date clients.  It doesn't occur to them that you might not like them.  He was an older and very intelligent guy who really should have known better.

You are paid to be nice. I think I'm laid back and easy to get on with. They take this completely the wrong way.  You can't say to them you find them physically repulsive and you would never go out with them. All you can say is "Sorry I don't want to go out with you".

I absolutely hate it when they think these sex sites are like hook up or dating sites.

I would never go out with a client. If I met a guy in real life I would check out of he ever used escorts or had done and drop him.

Paedophile
Murderer
Escort user.

Three things to check in new partner.

I would not date an escort user don’t know if that’s hypocritical

So it's ok to charge for sex but not ok to pay for it? 

She might have meant she just do not want to date someone who uses sex workers because so many cheat, so many get addicted to it being like a sweet shop and enjoy it too much and don't want to give it up if they get in a relationship.

The difference is most sex workers do it for the money only and a lot of men pay for it as they enjoy it a lot so there would be in back of your mind are they out booking still.

Deluded men are our bread and butter really, not many guys can accept your only sleeping them with for money, that’s basically what the main part of the job is, asides from the physical stuff then imo a sw job is to make the client think you enjoy having sex with them and it’s not about the cash, this is what I’m now having trouble with, I find if they are too deluded then I lose my shit and be too blunt, I think I’m just bored and fed up with this job atm and it’s time to either move on forever or take a year off!

You see my mind set is a lot of the men that use escorts cannot be trusted. It's not about because they have paid for our services.

It’s both for me, I think if we were all really honest then no women wants a man that pays for it and this includes sex workers, I don’t want any man in my personal life to think they have the right to purchase a women’s body, being paid by these men is okay as it’s work but I just couldn’t have a boyfriend that was a user of escorts, anyway the type of men I like in my personal life just aren’t the type to pay for it, some men just aren’t!