SAAFE forum
General Category => Blather and Babble => Topic started by: GirlyGirlx on 23 May 2013, 06:02:52 pm
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So since I am on a roll today about things that make me uncomfortable or cringe I thought I'd ask this question too.....
When your with a client and say he's on top of you for example how do you feel when they ask you to look at them?
When it happens to me I wanna run away and hide lol. In real life I have no issues at all with eye contact weathers its general chit chat or weather its sex, In fact I would say I naturally give eye contact and find it strange if I am not getting it back when having a conversation with someone. When with a client I am fine with eye contact during a conversation also but when it comes to the sex I just cannot look at them.
I think my reason for not liking direct eye contact with them is cause it sort of bring me to the reality of what I am doing but I'm not entirely sure that's the reason for it.
I know some men love eye contact and as I say in real life with a partner I choose to be with I enjoy it too but when its work related its just a no-no.
I had a guy ask me this over and over last month and all the way through it he kept telling me how much he loved me, i'm not sure if he was having a moment of madness or if he does love me but either way I wont be seeing him again as every time I have met him he has got weirder and weirder.
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I don't have a problem with it personally and don't recall anyone who has made me uneasy when giving eye contact. I find that a lot of men really get turned on by it big time and sometimes a certain look can really help them along, if you know what I mean? ;) I also feel it helps them remember who is in control, which after reading your other post maybe you should consider a half way point?
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Pffft lol I just cant do it. I don't mean giving them eye contact when giving oral, I can usually get away with not giving them eye contact cause Ive so much flippin hair lol its more when they are on top making sweet love to me (in their mind) and asking me to look into their eyes (just thinking about it is making me cringe) I think its particularly making me cringe cause I am thinking of the guy who kept telling me loved me as I gazed into his eyes, eeeeeeeeeeeek!!
Oh no I'm not gonna lie, it just aint for me. But then again ALOT of normal things make me cringe, Roleplay makes me cringe so bad too. I realise I am the weirdo here but seriously I am just a terrible actress and I have a broad Scottish accent so roleplaying with a Scottish accent sounds horrendous. If I had a nice English accent I think I could at least give it a try.
xx
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LOL! I don't like role plays either to be honest, but I find it easier now than I ever used to! I have a GCSE in Drama so should be good at it really! ;D When I do make an effort it usually goes really well, what I do struggle with is talking dirty! I can usually manage one line and then get a brain freeze and can't think of anything else so end up sounding like a stuck record! LMAO! I think I need to spend more time on webcam as it's easier when not face to face so is good practice! :)
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Hahahaha I get brain freeze too but in every day life not just when dirty talking (I should be blonde) But really Roleplay/Dirty talk sounds horrendous with my accent.
I have a friend who got into porn (I wont say her name) and in all her movies she has a full on English accent, I said what is that all about and she said I'd never have been so successful in my career if I'd used my Scottish accent. I think she's absolutely right lol, Hate it when I hear Scottish people on Jeremy Kyle or something (Cringe) So for me dirty talk and roleplay just doesn't work and to get back to the OP neither does eye contact with a client (Gives me the creeps) lol.
xx
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Ha, I'm just like you!
Eye contact makes me cringe, and I avoid roleplay because I'm sure I'd be crap at it. I'm not confident enough and not naturally a 'faker' lol, so wouldn't be able to pull it off convincingly.
I think eye contact just feels embarassing and awkward! If I have to do it, I let my eyes lose focus so their face just looks a blur.. makes it easier! It's just too intimate, like they want to pretend you're all loved up? Or they want you to give them the 'porn star' look to say you're really enjoying the (not so) hot'n'horny sex! Eek.
That's why I stick to GFE, I'll never be a porn star lol :)
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Ha, I'm just like you!
Eye contact makes me cringe, and I avoid roleplay because I'm sure I'd be crap at it. I'm not confident enough and not naturally a 'faker' lol, so wouldn't be able to pull it off convincingly.
I think eye contact just feels embarassing and awkward! If I have to do it, I let my eyes lose focus so their face just looks a blur.. makes it easier! It's just too intimate, like they want to pretend you're all loved up? Or they want you to give them the 'porn star' look to say you're really enjoying the (not so) hot'n'horny sex! Eek.
That's why I stick to GFE, I'll never be a porn star lol :)
OMG if I didn't know any better I'd think I wrote this lol, you sound EXACTLY like me and you knocked the nail on the head - INTIMATE!! That's my problem cause like I said I don't have these eye contact problems in real life with someone I choose to be with but with work its far too intimate for me aswell as cringey as hell.
Roleplay you just need to be a good actress and be confident I guess, I just cant do it lol.
xx
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To this, where do you look when not making eye contact during sex. Like in conversation you look away if your in thought of speech, that's natural but if your staring at the headboard the dudes going to be like The fck.... It's not like conversation eye contact because 90% of the time your giving eye contact, I would imagine 90% engaged eye contact during sex would freak anyone out. I close my eyes even though I know it's a no go and probabley give 10% dirty eye contact but that is what feels natural to me, as that is what i do in my personal life with my long term partner
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Oh I absolutely LOVE role-play..!! ;D
As for eye-contact, I'm ok with it, kinda depending on the client, most of the time I shut my eyes about 50% of
the time and open them the other 50% (obviously on and off..), but I find making conversation while having sex
a total passion-killer..
It's a bit like "oh did you her about mary fae round the corner, well she.. " if yous know what I mean.. ;)
Not very romantic/sexual etc..
I prefer some noises of enjoyment/appreciation etc, I love eye-contact while giving a bj though, and I think a lot of guys do too!
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I HATE when guys stare at your face. I HATEHATEHATE it. It makes me feel so awkward and self concious, I usually just do some moaning and close my eyes a lot so that I don't have to look at them >:( I quite often pull faces to myself for my own amusement when I'm bored during a booking and know the client can't see my face. It keeps me entertained.
Actually I'm reading a book (The sex myth ~ Brooke Magnanti) at the moment which references a study that looked at where women and men look when they looked at erotic images - it uses an eye tracking device. The results showed hetero women tend to look straight at a man's genitals whereas hetero men will be more likely to look at a woman's face. They think it's because when men are turned on it's usually pretty easy to tell because they have an erection so women will look there but with women, a man can't tell from her genitals whether she is turned on and a better indicator of arousal might be her facial expression. (Sorry if a bit off topic, just thought it was quite an interesting study and might be? why men like eye contact).
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Lol I do the face-pulling thing as well when I know they can't see me, when their head's are buried somewhere between my
legs for example and they've no idea what they're doing ;)
I was doing it the other day and nearly burst out laughing, only just stopped myself..
Or I use the time to wipe away some eye make-up that's a bit smeared, all the while they think they're thinking they're
giving you the time of your life.. :D
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Haha, I wipe my eye make up too Siorse! and rub the edges of my lips in case they've smudged and sometimes check my nails to see if they've chipped :D
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If they ask I'll give them eye contact I find it very hard to do it with a dick in my mouth, I have to shrink my head back into my neck.
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I give them eye contact without being asked and I like it :) I always tell them in a sexy voice to grab an extra pillow and enjoy the show ;D
Especially when I do a sloppy BJ with loads of saliva and look in their eyes, sometimes I wink, I smile, and they love it. Me too, I get turned on plus its an important part of a giving a good girlfriend experience...
Same goes for sex, kissing a lot and gazing them is a must for me.
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So since I am on a roll today about things that make me uncomfortable or cringe I thought I'd ask this question too.....
When your with a client and say he's on top of you for example how do you feel when they ask you to look at them?
When it happens to me I wanna run away and hide lol. In real life I have no issues at all with eye contact weathers its general chit chat or weather its sex, In fact I would say I naturally give eye contact and find it strange if I am not getting it back when having a conversation with someone. When with a client I am fine with eye contact during a conversation also but when it comes to the sex I just cannot look at them.
I think my reason for not liking direct eye contact with them is cause it sort of bring me to the reality of what I am doing but I'm not entirely sure that's the reason for it.
I know some men love eye contact and as I say in real life with a partner I choose to be with I enjoy it too but when its work related its just a no-no.
I had a guy ask me this over and over last month and all the way through it he kept telling me how much he loved me, i'm not sure if he was having a moment of madness or if he does love me but either way I wont be seeing him again as every time I have met him he has got weirder and weirder.
I think not wanting to make eye contact with a client is about keeping your core self protected. I know that sounds deep but, for me, these men are engaging in complete objectification and I don't want to give any more of myself than I already am. They get enough. I can't look in their eyes. They are not men who care so what you may find there wouldn't be nice to look at.
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well see that's the weird thing. I don't look at even my lover in the eyes, neither of us are into that. I just find it weird which is why i'm bad at it in my bookings. I kind of like sex faces, I think they're cute & it's a turn on for me, so it's not that I don't want to look at them for that reason.
I'm OTT with everything else passionate that comes with GFE lol. Kissing, feeling, even intense cuddling haha. But eye contact is such a hard thing for me. Doesn't it look weird when eyes are closed ???
Fuck it when in doubt, watch porn XD
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Eye contact is great in relationship sex, and I don't mind it with clients at all. I do naturally close my eyes a lot though. If you really hate it, one trick is to look inbetween their eyebrows - but I would always try and look them in the eye if you do GFEs.
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When I'm on top I can look into their eyes and not mind it if they're staring at me although they often close their eyes or look away. When they're on top and looking at me I too feel cringey so start to play with their nipples or rub their chest and admire that! Don't know why there's a difference, probably because when I'm on top I'm in control but when they're on top I feel like they're trying to make me look at them, perhaps. It's worse when their faces are very close to mine. I think that's it :-\
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I give them eye contact without being asked and I like it :) I always tell them in a sexy voice to grab an extra pillow and enjoy the show ;D
Especially when I do a sloppy BJ with loads of saliva and look in their eyes, sometimes I wink, I smile, and they love it. Me too, I get turned on plus its an important part of a giving a good girlfriend experience...
Same goes for sex, kissing a lot and gazing them is a must for me.
I look at them loads too and they love it ;D I think it gives the appointment a sexier more intimate vibe! Closing my eyes doesn't work for me at all because i like to connect with them and I find it strange when they keep their eyes clamped shut so won't do it myself.
I'm wondering if the escorts who close their eyes tend to be younger? Sorry if that sounds ageist but I feel more confident as I age and wonder if that's part of it? I've always kept my eyes open tho since the first sex experience I had. Now I'm wondering if I'm weird lol
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I give them eye contact without being asked and I like it :) I always tell them in a sexy voice to grab an extra pillow and enjoy the show ;D
Especially when I do a sloppy BJ with loads of saliva and look in their eyes, sometimes I wink, I smile, and they love it. Me too, I get turned on plus its an important part of a giving a good girlfriend experience...
Same goes for sex, kissing a lot and gazing them is a must for me.
I look at them loads too and they love it ;D I think it gives the appointment a sexier more intimate vibe! Closing my eyes doesn't work for me at all because i like to connect with them and I find it strange when they keep their eyes clamped shut so won't do it myself.
I'm wondering if the escorts who close their eyes tend to be younger? Sorry if that sounds ageist but I feel more confident as I age and wonder if that's part of it? I've always kept my eyes open tho since the first sex experience I had. Now I'm wondering if I'm weird lol
Hiya,
No it's not to do with age...I'm not young. I just find it uncomfortable as looking into a man's eyes for me is about wanting to be mentally intimate with him and I don't want to be mentally intimate with this type of man x
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Eye contact is great in relationship sex, and I don't mind it with clients at all. I do naturally close my eyes a lot though. If you really hate it, one trick is to look inbetween their eyebrows - but I would always try and look them in the eye if you do GFEs.
I dislike eye contact but clients love it.
...if they insist:
I stare at the point above the bridge of their
nose where the eyebrows would meet.
They think you're staring into their eyes
but you're not.
It's an hypnosis technique to prevent
being inadvertently entranced by the
patient's eyes. ;D
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I give them eye contact without being asked and I like it :) I always tell them in a sexy voice to grab an extra pillow and enjoy the show ;D
Especially when I do a sloppy BJ with loads of saliva and look in their eyes, sometimes I wink, I smile, and they love it. Me too, I get turned on plus its an important part of a giving a good girlfriend experience...
Same goes for sex, kissing a lot and gazing them is a must for me.
I look at them loads too and they love it ;D I think it gives the appointment a sexier more intimate vibe! Closing my eyes doesn't work for me at all because i like to connect with them and I find it strange when they keep their eyes clamped shut so won't do it myself.
I'm wondering if the escorts who close their eyes tend to be younger? Sorry if that sounds ageist but I feel more confident as I age and wonder if that's part of it? I've always kept my eyes open tho since the first sex experience I had. Now I'm wondering if I'm weird lol
Hiya,
No it's not to do with age...I'm not young. I just find it uncomfortable as looking into a man's eyes for me is about wanting to be mentally intimate with him and I don't want to be mentally intimate with this type of man x
Hiya,
Thanks for answering! I can relate to what you say because in my personal life its really important. When I look at a client im looking for different reasons than with someone im not being paid to have sex with. I'm not looking very deep with clients at all. I'm probably working out the shopping list but they'd never know that ;)
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Lol I do the face-pulling thing as well when I know they can't see me, when their head's are buried somewhere between my
legs for example and they've no idea what they're doing ;)
I was doing it the other day and nearly burst out laughing, only just stopped myself..
Or I use the time to wipe away some eye make-up that's a bit smeared, all the while they think they're thinking they're
giving you the time of your life.. :D
I do this ALL the time! Pull faces when they're not looking I just can't help myself! It's the inner child in me haha.
And last night I had a client who "loved to give oral" and said he was great at it but he was absolutely shit! And I mean shit! I was rolling my eyes through the whole thing then had to keep reminding myself to moan and pretend it's enjoyable so he doesn't feel awkward or Bob his head up and ask if it's good lol!
Poor things some of them just have no idea hahaha x
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I know most clients find it a real turn-on giving them eye-contact when you're giving them a BJ, but I have to agree with Doedeer,
when you're in an awkward position it can be quite difficult lol.
Another thing I hate is when they're trying to make conversation when you're giving them a BJ, how tf am I supposed to answer
when I've got a dick in my mouth ???
I end up kind of going; "eheemm ,mm , yehmm, mm, ahm eh" or take it out, answer, and continue, which kinda ruins the
moment ;D