SAAFE forum
General Category => Blather and Babble => Topic started by: chloe94 on 19 February 2015, 02:19:40 pm
-
A client I've seen before texted to reschedule his appointment, isn't sure when he can come so I said let me know, he then texts "oh and I will need a 10 min shower thanks"
Erm.. I don't think so! I texted back saying he will be all wrinkly meaning "don't take the piss" and he just joked back about it.
Never had a problem with showers before but please tell me all your shower stories haha!
-
A client I've seen before texted to reschedule his appointment, isn't sure when he can come so I said let me know, he then texts "oh and I will need a 10 min shower thanks"
Erm.. I don't think so! I texted back saying he will be all wrinkly meaning "don't take the piss" and he just joked back about it.
Never had a problem with showers before but please tell me all your shower stories haha!
Ha! If he wants a 10 minute shower, that will eat into his appointment...and yes, I have said that before! ;D
-
I offer prostate massage, and 9 times out of 10 (even though the client may have thought he had emptied his bowels or douched/enema'd properly) the client ends up with brown stuff round his bumhole (I can be quite vigourous...AND generous with the lube!). So no baby wiping delicately for me, it's off to the shower for them! I have literally bundled men into the bathroom and said "right, time for a quick shower before we continue!".
I'm not wiping their bums for them :D I don't even do that during an Adult Baby session ;D
-
Yes I had a client ages ago take the piss before and after our booking. I always offer a shower on my time at the start and the end, it should only take a few minutes but this client spent about 15 mins in the shower at the start and fuck knows how long at the end. When he came out at the end he said his hair felt really nice and soft after he used my 3 minute miracle conditioning treatment, WTF?
Another man who point blank refused a shower before our booking was filthy and extremely sweaty, cold sweat. He wanted a back massage at the start and the end of our booking which normally is offered but in this case, I had to tell him that I felt slightly (very) queasy swooshing cold stale sweat all around his back. He smelt like a mixture of onions and some sort of fungus like dampness. At the end he asked me for a shower (this was a half hour booking, one of the reasons why I don't do half hours anymore as we were already over a half hour) anyway when he asked me I must have had a look of disgust on my face but I took him in and he spent at least 10 minutes in there using all my stuff, I heard a funny noise so I chapped the door to see what he was doing and it turned out that he had dragged my scales out and was giving himself a wee weigh-in! I asked him to get out of the bathroom and told him that I was really quite furious that he refused a shower before getting intimate with me then to have the cheek and ask for one after and while he's pissing about in my shower.....I am left standing waiting covered in his stink! I asked him never to contact me again!
Normally I wouldn't have been so confrontational in person as I hate it but I was really angry and wanted him to know how unreasonable he was. He didn't even apologise, he just walked out.
He had bad breath to boot and was slobbering all over me! Was a dreadful, smelly experience, ive had worse though.
-
Funny this topic has come up, this week I had a client actually spend 10 minutes in my shower then complained it wasn't powerful enough, it was at the end of the session and he was eating into MY time, cheeky sod, then I had a guy literally flood my bathroom whilst in the shower and left his towel swimming in it x
-
I keep my things out of the bathroom when doing incalls (like hell they are wasting my stuff :-)), I'm also really stingy and keep towels in the wardrobes and put one hand towel and one bath towel through just before the booking (didn't ised to but after an idiot going through 6 towels I soon learned).
-
I have one bottle of shower gel that is pink and smells of roses. I keep it on the least convenient corner of the tub. I have another bottle of blue shower gel that smells like ... I dunno... something vaguely manly. I keep it RIGHT NEXT TO THE SHOWER HEAD.
Guess which one they use? ::)
-
I keep my bath and hair towels on a rack, and the hand towel is right by the sink. If clients shower, I put a towel on the radiator for them. The latter only seems to be used about two-thirds of the time, as they use my (often still damp) hair towel instead, as do others just drying their hands!
Anyone else found that young clients (under 25) often just aren't very house-trained...?
-
I don't have such a luxurious shower that they want to live in there (my bathroom is very clean, it's just not fancy). If I did have one and I got guys doing what we used to call "taking a Hollywood" in the Navy, I would be tempted to do something like flush a toilet or run the kitchen sink on hot. Since mine is an electric powered shower I might even consider flicking the breaker that powers it and saying "Oh, dear!"
-
I have one bottle of shower gel that is pink and smells of roses. I keep it on the least convenient corner of the tub. I have another bottle of blue shower gel that smells like ... I dunno... something vaguely manly. I keep it RIGHT NEXT TO THE SHOWER HEAD.
Guess which one they use? ::)
I have 3 bottles of men's shower gel in my shower tidy thing, all different smells so they can use which ever one they want but more often than not, they use my shower gel. Doesn't bother me, it's only shower gel but I do wonder why half of them would want to go home to their wives smelling of ladies toiletries x
-
On this note what do men *do* in the shower?!- The number of times my bathroom floor ends up covered in water- there's a shower curtain and a bath mat and they get a huge towel, but somehow they leave enormous puddles. It's no biggie, but it makes me wonder! Do they jump out of shower and then shake themselves like a dog does after a swim?!
-
They may be putting the curtain outside the tub - a shower curtain will rise and move inwards and cling to your legs. They may be selfish enough to push the curtain outside the tube so they can avoid that.
I have just one of those half screens and they don't really get big puddles on my floor.
-
I have one bottle of shower gel that is pink and smells of roses. I keep it on the least convenient corner of the tub. I have another bottle of blue shower gel that smells like ... I dunno... something vaguely manly. I keep it RIGHT NEXT TO THE SHOWER HEAD.
Guess which one they use? ::)
I have 3 bottles of men's shower gel in my shower tidy thing, all different smells so they can use which ever one they want but more often than not, they use my shower gel. Doesn't bother me, it's only shower gel but I do wonder why half of them would want to go home to their wives smelling of ladies toiletries x
Same as me, I always have 2-3 different types of mens shower gel they can use, mouth wash, new gillette plastic razors in case they want to shave, after shave cream, new sponge, all this for 5 pounds.. Its worth the money :)
-
On this note what do men *do* in the shower?!- The number of times my bathroom floor ends up covered in water- there's a shower curtain and a bath mat and they get a huge towel, but somehow they leave enormous puddles. It's no biggie, but it makes me wonder! Do they jump out of shower and then shake themselves like a dog does after a swim?!
Yeah the puddle thing is funny, I have a nice clean mat thing in front of the shower from them to step on but the foot print puddles are always beside the mat lol. Ever noticed how most men don't know how to dry themselves either? Lol. They always lay down on my bed soaking wet and go in for a cuddle where I get cold water on me or I'm lying on cold wet patches on the bed. My towels are all fluffy, clean and smelling fresh so I don't know why they do it lol. Of course they aren't all like that but most are.
Men ::) not clients, just men in general lol ::)
-
I have one bottle of shower gel that is pink and smells of roses. I keep it on the least convenient corner of the tub. I have another bottle of blue shower gel that smells like ... I dunno... something vaguely manly. I keep it RIGHT NEXT TO THE SHOWER HEAD.
Guess which one they use? ::)
I have 3 bottles of men's shower gel in my shower tidy thing, all different smells so they can use which ever one they want but more often than not, they use my shower gel. Doesn't bother me, it's only shower gel but I do wonder why half of them would want to go home to their wives smelling of ladies toiletries x
Same as me, I always have 2-3 different types of mens shower gel they can use, mouth wash, new gillette plastic razors in case they want to shave, after shave cream, new sponge, all this for 5 pounds.. Its worth the money :)
I have one generic shower gel (tip: decant cheap Asda shit into a fancy brand bottle ;) ) and a massive bottle of Listerine out. Another WG I know buys those bulk packs of very cheap toothbrushes at the pound shop to offer men but I find I barely have the nerve to ask them to swish with mouthwash.
Do the men really appreciate and use the variety of shower gels, after shave, and razors? I have no problem offering them, but I'm not sure where I could put them and I didn't know if they would be used.
-
I think razors and after shave is going a bit far, but I offer 4-5 different shower gels, mouthwash, and have some disposable toothbrushes.
-
I have one shower gel which is the Simple fragrance free one - if punters are really concerned they often bring their own anyway, and I can't see that going home smelling 'different' is any easier to explain if it's a 'men's' smell? Some could pass it off as something from the gym I suppose, but at least the plain one takes it out of the equation :).
I don't do reverse oral, but even for kissing I wouldn't want a punter who had just brushed his teeth and could possibly have traces of blood in his mouth/saliva. I do have mouthwash though (and I also learnt to hide all my stuff away years ago after realising once that a punter had washed his knob in the basin with my Clinique >:().
-
(tip: decant cheap Asda shit into a fancy brand bottle ;) )[/quote]
I thought I was the only cheap fucker who did this lmao ;)
-
I have one bottle of shower gel that is pink and smells of roses. I keep it on the least convenient corner of the tub. I have another bottle of blue shower gel that smells like ... I dunno... something vaguely manly. I keep it RIGHT NEXT TO THE SHOWER HEAD.
Guess which one they use? ::)
I have 3 bottles of men's shower gel in my shower tidy thing, all different smells so they can use which ever one they want but more often than not, they use my shower gel. Doesn't bother me, it's only shower gel but I do wonder why half of them would want to go home to their wives smelling of ladies toiletries x
Same as me, I always have 2-3 different types of mens shower gel they can use, mouth wash, new gillette plastic razors in case they want to shave, after shave cream, new sponge, all this for 5 pounds.. Its worth the money :)
I have one generic shower gel (tip: decant cheap Asda shit into a fancy brand bottle ;) ) and a massive bottle of Listerine out. Another WG I know buys those bulk packs of very cheap toothbrushes at the pound shop to offer men but I find I barely have the nerve to ask them to swish with mouthwash.
Do the men really appreciate and use the variety of shower gels, after shave, and razors? I have no problem offering them, but I'm not sure where I could put them and I didn't know if they would be used.
Yeah I think they do appreciate it, even if they don't use the stuff. I often get a good response from the fact that my bathroom is spotless, nice clean fluffy towels, verity of shower gels, deodorant, mouthwash and hair wax/gel.
Have never thought of having razors available for them but I may just do that.
I offer a very vanilla type service so it's these little things that my clients like that makes the whole experience a much better one for them.
xx
-
(tip: decant cheap Asda shit into a fancy brand bottle ;) )
OMG lol we're earning ?100+ an hour, surely you could slash out on a proper bottle of shower gel lol.
I buy all the different Lynx ones that smell delish, I usually get the Lynx Rise, Sport Blast and Recover for them to use and they are only ?1 each from Asda usually.
xx
-
(tip: decant cheap Asda shit into a fancy brand bottle ;) )
OMG lol we're earning ?100+ an hour, surely you could slash out on a proper bottle of shower gel lol.
I buy all the different Lynx ones that smell delish, I usually get the Lynx Rise, Sport Blast and Recover for them to use and they are only ?1 each from Asda usually.
xx
Haha! If they want fancy stuff they can buy it and bring it with them. Why should I spend my money on fancy stuff that's just going to make them take even longer in the shower?
-
(tip: decant cheap Asda shit into a fancy brand bottle ;) )
OMG lol we're earning ?100+ an hour, surely you could slash out on a proper bottle of shower gel lol.
I buy all the different Lynx ones that smell delish, I usually get the Lynx Rise, Sport Blast and Recover for them to use and they are only ?1 each from Asda usually.
xx
Haha! If they want fancy stuff they can buy it and bring it with them. Why should I spend my money on fancy stuff that's just going to make them take even longer in the shower?
That's what I'm saying though, it's not fancy.....it's only a ?1 a bottle and it's one of the better makes.
I don't see how a better make of shower gel would keep them in the shower any longer than a cheaper make of shower gel though?
But each to their own.....if you and your clients are happy with cheaper shower gel then it's not the end of the world is it?
I just find that I make lots and lots of money in this business thanks to my clients so I'm hardly gonna grudge a wee bit of shower gel.
xx
-
1 Adidas/Tango/Lynxx etc shower gel is 1 pound, so if I spent 2 pounds/week for this its nothing compared with what I earn. I also have a Niveaa men deodorant which cost 1 pound/month, 20 pence new white bath sponges from Wilkinson, also 1 pound/month.
Rarely I have clients who wants to shave, but I am prepared for that case, its not hurting anyone :)
Plus I have fluffy large bath robe and a lighter summer one for them plus slippers and I always show them into the shower taking the bath robe with me if they undress in there or they can take it on them if they take their clothes off in my bedroom.
My fee for one hour its a minimum wage in some countries so for the money they pay, the least I can do its to give them a good honest service and a minimum comfort they deserve.
-
Yip exactly, I am really choosy about who I see so by the time I weed out all the idiots and morons that contact me.......9 times out of 10, I am left with real decent men walking through my door so I would like the whole experience from me looking nice and being fresh and clean to offering the best I can (within my limited boundaries that they have already accepted by reading my profile) to the little things like having a nice clean bathroom, nice clean fluffy towels for them to use with plenty of toiletries. Most of them DO really appreciate this x
-
(tip: decant cheap Asda shit into a fancy brand bottle ;) )
OMG lol we're earning ?100+ an hour, surely you could slash out on a proper bottle of shower gel lol.
I buy all the different Lynx ones that smell delish, I usually get the Lynx Rise, Sport Blast and Recover for them to use and they are only ?1 each from Asda usually.
xx
Businesses may rake in lots of revenue and still keep a beady eye on expenses.
I think the vast majority of these guys honestly don't care what toiletries are available for them. After all, they're using the pink rose-scented stuff instead of the blue "ocean" stuff that is gender neutral. I also once made the mistake of leaving my expensive shampoo in there and someone used it as shower gel and squirted half the bottle all over the shower.
Another thing I learned was to not get the type of shower gel that is in a bottle designed to hang from the shower attachment - I got tired of them leaving it hanging open, dribbling into the tub and being wasted.
There are some things I do to pamper them (I have a system for keeping scented hot towels by the bed and give a very sensual clean before and after we play) and there are stacks of folded clean towels on display. I keep them on a shelving unit OUTSIDE the bathroom and hand them a towel when they go in because I'm not keen on some fool getting them all wet or something and making more laundry for me. I also have a clean, dry bathmat draped over the edge of the tub for them. The bathroom is spotless - I really do think that matters to them.
-
(tip: decant cheap Asda shit into a fancy brand bottle ;) )
OMG lol we're earning ?100+ an hour, surely you could slash out on a proper bottle of shower gel lol.
I buy all the different Lynx ones that smell delish, I usually get the Lynx Rise, Sport Blast and Recover for them to use and they are only ?1 each from Asda usually.
xx
Businesses may rake in lots of revenue and still keep a beady eye on expenses.
I think the vast majority of these guys honestly don't care what toiletries are available for them. After all, they're using the pink rose-scented stuff instead of the blue "ocean" stuff that is gender neutral. I also once made the mistake of leaving my expensive shampoo in there and someone used it as shower gel and squirted half the bottle all over the shower.
Another thing I learned was to not get the type of shower gel that is in a bottle designed to hang from the shower attachment - I got tired of them leaving it hanging open, dribbling into the tub and being wasted.
There are some things I do to pamper them (I have a system for keeping scented hot towels by the bed and give a very sensual clean before and after we play) and there are stacks of folded clean towels on display. I keep them on a shelving unit OUTSIDE the bathroom and hand them a towel when they go in because I'm not keen on some fool getting them all wet or something and making more laundry for me. I also have a clean, dry bathmat draped over the edge of the tub for them. The bathroom is spotless - I really do think that matters to them.
I completely agree that you'd wanna keep the cost down, everyone in any business sensibly wants to keep the expenses down but I'm just saying that a wee quid here and there for shower gel can't be grudged surely? To the point where some ladies are pouring cheap shower gel into not so cheap bottles just seems like a lot of hassle for the sake of a pound.
But each to their own.
xx
-
I keep the towels in a bathroom cabinet, plenty of them and always have on display one small and 2 big towells they can use. I always wait for them in the hallway and when they finished, I take their wet towel and put it in the laundry basked on the way to my bedroom so I avoid my fat mate clients finding a wet towell my client used and viceversa and I always have a clean extra towel on display. Easy to be done :)
Plus I have 3 very large towels for bigger build clients and they apreciate when I hand them one of those.
This are just few things I like to have/do for my clients and yes, they are apreciating my care as I have a lot of returning clients, few of them as long as 5 years (of course I have other ways of keeping them regulars, one of them is to do different things/start our session in a different way every time).
For few pounds/ month I spend for them I get hundreds/thousands in return and Im happy with that :)
-
I don't even like to spend money on shower gel in my home. I do have that pretty pink stuff that I bought in an odd mood but I pretty much just use the cheap stuff for myself. I certainly do at home. I hate waste and my kids waste it and it drives me batty.
What started me refilling bottles was getting tired of having maybe a centimetre left in the bottle and feeling like it would be wasteful to chuck it so I figured I would refill it. Supermarkets sell really large bottles of the cheap stuff (less than a pound for probably 4x a regular shower gel bottle. I think it may actually be labeled as bubble bath but the ingredients appear to be identical to the store brand shower gel.) I do think that having a "nice" brand name bottle looks good and so I'm happy to just use that same bottle until it looks tatty.
If I were to spend money on a particular shower gel, I think I would go for the unscented stuff Amy uses.
I really hate doing any more laundry than I have to - it's a massive hassle to dry it. I already have two massive airers taking up most of my lounge and they're always draped in something. I wash sheets towards the end of the work day and take them home to tumble dry. I lay a clean sheet down on the bed for each client so this can be a lot of laundry in a busy week. I'm so stingy about laundry that I will take their towel (usually drying their backs for them) and then drape it over the chair and if they want another shower when they leave they use the same towel.
A busy day will produce up to three loads of laundry by the time I wash bathmats, towels, sheets, and the hot flannels. I'm pretty keen to avoid increasing the bother and expense of laundry.
But I'm going to buy a pack of toothbrushes for heavy smokers - my friend says that they never seem to mind being asked to clean their teeth. And I think I may buy a neutral antiperspirant for those who might like it. I can just about manage to ask smokers to brush and use mouthwash, but I wouldn't have the nerve to tell them to use deodorant. Wish I could sometimes!
-
If I were to spend money on a particular shower gel, I think I would go for the unscented stuff Amy uses.
The Simple stuff can be got for 99p in Wilko or Savers if you wait for it to go on offer - I stock up then :D. Lynx, Original Source and so on are often a quid in Wilko too so I buy them for myself and punters can use it if they want.
I refill bubble bath at home - I have a pretty glass bottle that came in a gift box a couple of Christmases ago, so I just buy what I want and fill it again when it's empty as it looks nicer on the shelf than the plastic ones.
Laundry is the bane of my life since I got my work flat - after years of working from hotels (where towels are nice neat folded things that come on a trolley you help yourself from) it hadn't really crossed my mind until I started and had a few busy days in a row. There have been days when I thought if I had to iron another pillowcase I would lose my mind, but I'm getting used to it :).
-
There have been days when I thought if I had to iron another pillowcase I would lose my mind, but I'm getting used to it :).
Oh no!
Use patterned ones and fold them neatly like I do.
I would go mad if I ironed stuff like that.
-
There have been days when I thought if I had to iron another pillowcase I would lose my mind, but I'm getting used to it :).
Oh no!
Use patterned ones and fold them neatly like I do.
I would go mad if I ironed stuff like that.
I don't do the duvet covers, although I did try ;D.
Now I get them nearly dry in the tumble dryer and hang them carefully over the shower rail so the creases nearly all go. I can't have patterned linen even just to work on because my OCD can't cope with it, but I don't mind giving one side of a plllowcase a quick whizz and then they lie flat in a big stack in one of the bed drawers :).
-
I usually have just one bottle of gel but sometimes I've put man's radox or similar but the big normal bottle was nearest to the shower so they mostly used that one. So then I put the men's nearest to them. (They're so lazy lol). Some might care about brands but most don't I think.
I don't use it much myself as I think it's like using conditioner rather than shampoo to wash hair! I feel cleaner using soap and sponge and I have had a few guys ask to use soap and flannel. Downside is can leave scum :'(
I bought some pillowcases with a woman's naked butt and another with what time do your legs open with a man on it, just for a laugh to use with client. I sometimes spend too much money on this job like some orgy rugs I put down. They are nice but the job made me buy them ;)
-
There have been days when I thought if I had to iron another pillowcase I would lose my mind, but I'm getting used to it :).
Oh no!
Use patterned ones and fold them neatly like I do.
I would go mad if I ironed stuff like that.
I don't iron sheets or pillowcases. I'll just make a joke about it as I spread it over the bed. "Every client gets a clean sheet but I draw the line at ironing them!" It would certainly look nicer if they were ironed but I would lose my little mind.
-
I'm cursed with OCD about bedding - I have about 20 sets, a lot of them in good quality cotton... so they REALLY need to be ironed. At any one time I normally have a pile of the stuff that could fill about three blanket boxes, and hardly any of it is clothing!
About every 6-8 weeks I just have mammoth ironing sessions, complete with scented ironing water. Fitted sheets are the buggers.
That said, for the colder weather I've got some faux fur throws which are good and very cosy, though I try not to get any bodily fluids on them. ;D
I wish you could get good quality jersey bedding more easily - that's great.
-
I have 4 shower gels,5 deodrants and mouth wash with shot glasses for them to use
I blame watching four in a bed for going overboard
-
Ok, I've wondered too long... What does this mean? Other than "seize the urine," which I can mostly rule out from context clues. :)
Another thread says "going out on the piss." Help out this American girl, please.
-
Ok, I've wondered too long... What does this mean? Other than "seize the urine," which I can mostly rule out from context clues. :)
Another thread says "going out on the piss." Help out this American girl, please.
Taking the piss is slang for taking the mickey - ie: taking advantage.
Going out on the piss is going out drinking alcohol. Getting pissed is getting drunk!
We do like the word piss over here ;D
-
I physically walk them in. Hand them a towel, from the bedroom, tell them "there's the shower, there's shower gel, deoderant, mouthwash if you want it" but they still do something weird like spend ten minutes washing their cock in the sink or empty a whole bog roll into the toilet to block it up..
-
I don't have those sorts of problems, really. The only thing that happens frequently with me is they like to fuck with the dials on the electric shower. I have to tell them, "Push the bottom button and hot water will come out. Turn the big dial in the middle towards red or blue to adjust the temperature." And then someone will put in on the power saver mode or set it to cold water and come out complaining that there's no hot water, or leave it in between settings, somehow. In other words, they fuck with the one dial I don't specifically point out to them. How hard can it be to work an electric shower? Especially when I've just told them to push the "On" button and then reminded them that the colours red and blue on the BIG dial are for temperature?
-
Lots or replies on here made me laugh inside, we are all very different in the way we work, which is why we all have different clients and regulars, which is good.
I'm another person who has the towels in my cupboard and hand them one when taking them into the bathroom, point at showergels, generally Sanax/Simple and a Radox if they fancy something scented, I then have deoderants and sprays and mouth wash if they wish to use them.
I have a power shower that I turn on for them, as the first bit is always really cold. I tell them if they want to change them temperature to do it slowly as I have my shower set on high pressure when you turn the dial it heats or gets cold really quickly.
I've brought some cheap aromatherapy bubble bath from Morrisons when it was on offer at 50p (brought 10) which was lovely and I refilled my Molton brown bottles with it, smelled just the same and nobody noticed. I love saving the pennies lol
-
i had a client the other day who was half an hour late for a half hour booking. he then spent a good 10 minutes in the shower after his half hour was up. i was not too happy and he had now been putnon my cut short list where i finish ten mins early to allow his shower time
-
I've just ordered a bulk order of towels and linen, my days of dong laundry every other night will be over ;D
I also bought loads of mouthwash, plastic shot glasses, baby wipes, body washes and deodorants. Even moisturiser!
I find walking them into a bathroom first then saying "this is the bathroom, would you like to shower first?" helps as once they can see it is clean and inviting with toiletries and everything they are more likely to say yes.
I have 2 bathrooms so all my products are in there and even then I save my nicest stuff for at home, little treat for when I get home :)