Author Topic: [Cultural barriers and language barriers with] Foreign Clients! (Read 3753 times)

Pink~Princess · « **on:** 22 April 2014, 11:20:22 am »

So when it comes to me choosing who I meet with, I go on how they come across on the phone like if they sound polite, friendly and if they at least know what they are taking about and I couldn't give a shit about the colour of their skin. If I was to start discriminating against a certain race because of problems I have had with them then I would have to refuse to see white men since the majority of my problems have been with white men so where would it end?

Yes I have had problems with Asian men, black men (only even been with one black man in Glasgow and he was a barebacker) and yes I have had problems with white men from attacks, robberies, threats, abuse, stalking and boundary pushing so really as I say, I choose my client based on how they sound not the colour of their skin.

Now the problem I have with foreign men is that I don't feel comfortable being alone with a complete stranger who I can barely understand and visa versa. I have met a couple in the past who were both boundary pushers and used the language barrier as an excuse but I've had boundary pushers with white men too. Boundary pushing aside, I am a chatty person and feel the atmosphere is very awkward when there's nothing to talk about since you don't really understand each other, theres a cultural difference and also you have nothing in common what so ever so I always avoid men with a foreign accent no matter what they sound like.

So the question is, am I alone here? Or do you guys feel the same? Or are you only interested in the money so don't care what type of situation/atmosphere your in aslong as your safe?

xx

title edited for clarity

Mellissa · « **Reply #1 on:** 22 April 2014, 11:29:07 am »

I'd find it very awkward being with a client who couldn't really speak English. Just me, but I don't want misunderstandings. I always insist on speaking to them on the phone before accepting the booking, which I'd decline if I couldn't really understand what they're saying.

If someone is really desperate for money then I guess they have to take almost any client that comes along but I'm thankful that for the moment I'm not in that situation.

amy · « **Reply #2 on:** 22 April 2014, 11:50:40 am »

PP, given that this thread is nothing to do with ethnic background and everything to do with both parties being able to communicate with each other effectively, shall we make sure it doesn't degenerate into the former - 'white' and 'foreign' aren't necessarily two different things any more than 'black' (or 'asian') and 'British' are? I've no particular wish to get the number of locked 'I'm not racist but' threads into double figures, but if necessary I can live with it.

As for the question, I won't see anybody whose spoken English is either so poor or so heavily accented that I can't understand them or they can't understand me, because I need to know not only that they've understood my services, fees and so on but also that I'm going to be able to give them directions over the phone without it being a complete disaster. The worst one I ever had was Norwegian, I literally couldn't understand a word he said and was so stressed out by the time he got to the door I was a complete wreck, although to be fair he'd been drinking (which I also didn't realise because I wasn't familiar with his accent) and wasn't taking any notice of what I said.

I've met lots of clients for whom English wasn't a first language, and one thing I have found is that they generally have a better level of it (both written and spoken) than plenty of native English speakers. I hang up the phone on far more Brits for talking total bollocks than I do anybody who maybe just gets a few verbs or tenses back to front.

Pink~Princess · « **Reply #3 on:** 22 April 2014, 11:56:37 am »

Yes Amy you've just out what I was trying to say the correct way but I'm glad you got what I was meaning as it's nothing to do with being racist or not. Just as you said, if their English is poor then it causes all sorts of problems and the awkward science of being alone with someone who's so different culturally to me etc. I hate to turn away what could be a decent person but the language and cultural barrier is what puts me off x

BibiofLeeds · « **Reply #4 on:** 22 April 2014, 12:21:16 pm »

I make it clear on my profile that have no problems with any race, the same applies to all prospective clients, good manners and respect from them, however I will not go ahead with a booking if the client cannot speak English very well.
Not only does it make it a pain in the arse for directing them but I also think it's potentially dangerous on a booking if they cannot understand what services I am prepared to offer or not as the case ma y be. Its common sense really and not a bigotry thing.
I have had bookings with French,Danish,Swedish,Latvian,Polish and German chaps as well as guys from all over Asia and Africa, they could all speak/and or read English to a high level.

Dexi Delite · « **Reply #5 on:** 22 April 2014, 12:25:15 pm »

As Mellissa and Amy say, it doesn't matter where they're from, if I can't understand them and they can't understand me then I won't see them. I don't want to let a stranger into my work place and there be any misunderstandings which could put me at risk.

KimberlyC · « **Reply #6 on:** 22 April 2014, 12:26:33 pm »

Years ago in America I had a German guy pretend to not have good enough english to communicate properly when it came time to talk about money.

So I yelled at him in German "I'm not playing! You must give me more money - now!" and he couldn't get his wallet open fast enough. LOL.

Pink~Princess · « **Reply #7 on:** 22 April 2014, 12:28:40 pm »

Quote from: bibi on 22 April 2014, 12:21:16 pm

I make it clear on my profile that have no problems with any race, the same applies to all prospective clients, good manners and respect from them, however I will not go ahead with a booking if the client cannot speak English very well.
Not only does it make it a pain in the arse for directing them but I also think it's potentially dangerous on a booking if they cannot understand what services I am prepared to offer or not as the case ma y be. Its common sense really and not a bigotry thing.
I have had bookings with French,Danish,Swedish,Latvian,Polish and German chaps as well as guys from all over Asia and Africa, they could all speak/and or read English to a high level.

This is exactly what I was trying to say and I am glad to see that I'm not the only one with this issues

Your right, it is common sense rather than bigotry or racist x

Pink~Princess · « **Reply #8 on:** 22 April 2014, 12:29:23 pm »

Have to say, in my experience......American clients are the best x

amy · « **Reply #9 on:** 22 April 2014, 12:31:36 pm »

Quote from: Pink~Princess on 22 April 2014, 11:20:22 am

I am a chatty person and feel the atmosphere is very awkward when there's nothing to talk about since you don't really understand each other, theres a cultural difference and also you have nothing in common what so ever so I always avoid men with a foreign accent no matter what they sound like.

If this is true, I think you're really losing out and not just on money. One of my favourite things about the job is meeting lots of different people from different backgrounds and places - those differences make for more to chat about, not less. There's a hell of a leap between refusing somebody you can't understand and turning away everybody who has a 'foreign' accent.

Some of the nicest punters I've met recently have been from Greece, Turkey, Kerala, Finland and France, and that's not even including the folks in Ireland and the States (and explaining to a wide-eyed New Yorker how we get the egg inside a Scotch egg was a moment I wouldn't have missed for anything

).

Quote from: Pink~Princess on 22 April 2014, 11:20:22 am

Or are you only interested in the money so don't care what type of situation/atmosphere your in aslong as your safe?

I think this is a bit unfair too, to be honest. You can't assume that because you would be uncomfortable in such a situation, anybody who doesn't mind it is 'only interested in the money' and doesn't give a damn about who they see. Some might appreciate the peace and quiet and being able to just get on with it

.

Pink~Princess · « **Reply #10 on:** 22 April 2014, 12:49:07 pm »

Amy if I am loosing out then this is why I started the thread, to see it from others point of view. Obviously I am looking into the situation with tunnel vision!

And as I already said, perhaps my wording of this wasn't the best as it's not so much foreign men I have issues with as I have some lovely clients from India who have only been in this country for a year or so and I have a lovely regular French man and there's my clients from America and Dubai etc........it's more to do with foreign men whom I haven't a clue what they are saying but their English is always quite good in an email or text but to speak to is horrendous.

Directions to my flat would be a no-no with someone who doesn't speak good English as Scottish, local men find my place a nightmare as it is.

xx

BibiofLeeds · « **Reply #11 on:** 22 April 2014, 12:52:33 pm »

Quote from: amy on 22 April 2014, 12:31:36 pm

Quote from: Pink~Princess on 22 April 2014, 11:20:22 am
I am a chatty person and feel the atmosphere is very awkward when there's nothing to talk about since you don't really understand each other, theres a cultural difference and also you have nothing in common what so ever so I always avoid men with a foreign accent no matter what they sound like.

If this is true, I think you're really losing out and not just on money. One of my favourite things about the job is meeting lots of different people from different backgrounds and places - those differences make for more to chat about, not less. There's a hell of a leap between refusing somebody you can't understand and turning away everybody who has a 'foreign' accent.

Some of the nicest punters I've met recently have been from Greece, Turkey, Kerala, Finland and France, and that's not even including the folks in Ireland and the States (and explaining to a wide-eyed New Yorker how we get the egg inside a Scotch egg was a moment I wouldn't have missed for anything ).

Quote from: Pink~Princess on 22 April 2014, 11:20:22 am
Or are you only interested in the money so don't care what type of situation/atmosphere your in aslong as your safe?

I think this is a bit unfair too, to be honest. You can't assume that because you would be uncomfortable in such a situation, anybody who doesn't mind it is 'only interested in the money' and doesn't give a damn about who they see. Some might appreciate the peace and quiet and being able to just get on with it .

I'm the same I love finding about their motherland and cultures during 'downtime'. Some of my most interesting bookings were with French and Danish clients and yes I agree with P.P american guys and Canadian guys are fun. There culture is not an issue, I love hearing about different topics and countries I just can't see people who cannot converse in English.

Rosa · « **Reply #12 on:** 22 April 2014, 01:16:22 pm »

It sounds to me as if you are a bit afraid PP. I too can be a bit nervous with someone who sounds culturally different to myself, but this can also be an opportunity to expand horizons and meet some good clients.

Even if someone is from a different culture, or background there is usually something you can find to talk about. Some common ground even if that common ground is not knowing things about each other's lives.

I do however also agree if I can't communicate with someone verbally, then I am not going to accept their booking but that goes for english nationals as much as anyone with any other language as their mother tongue.

happyhappyjoyjoy · « **Reply #13 on:** 22 April 2014, 03:21:33 pm »

You may well be missing out if you are saying no to people with a bit of an accent. My fave client is from greece and you would love him. Knows bounderies, never likes to run over the time, always clean, super respectful and great conversations.

The thing is even if you are missing out if you feel nervous everytime you speak to someone with an accent it's not a good start to your booking and perhaps it would not go so well if you are nervous? You have to do what you are comfortable doing.

Pink~Princess · « **Reply #14 on:** 22 April 2014, 04:51:01 pm »

HHJJ I ain't talking about guys with a bit of an accent, I have tones of clients with a bit of an accent.......I am talking about the ones who I can't understand a word they are saying that phone up and won't take no for an answer x

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Author Topic: [Cultural barriers and language barriers with] Foreign Clients! (Read 3753 times)

Pink~Princess

[Cultural barriers and language barriers with] Foreign Clients!

Mellissa

Re: [Cultural barriers and language barriers with] Foreign Clients!

amy

Re: [Cultural barriers and language barriers with] Foreign Clients!

Pink~Princess

Re: [Cultural barriers and language barriers with] Foreign Clients!

BibiofLeeds

Re: [Cultural barriers and language barriers with] Foreign Clients!

Dexi Delite

Re: [Cultural barriers and language barriers with] Foreign Clients!

KimberlyC

Re: [Cultural barriers and language barriers with] Foreign Clients!

Pink~Princess

Re: [Cultural barriers and language barriers with] Foreign Clients!

Pink~Princess

Re: [Cultural barriers and language barriers with] Foreign Clients!

amy

Re: [Cultural barriers and language barriers with] Foreign Clients!

Pink~Princess

Re: [Cultural barriers and language barriers with] Foreign Clients!

BibiofLeeds

Re: [Cultural barriers and language barriers with] Foreign Clients!

Rosa

Re: [Cultural barriers and language barriers with] Foreign Clients!

happyhappyjoyjoy

Re: [Cultural barriers and language barriers with] Foreign Clients!

Pink~Princess

Re: [Cultural barriers and language barriers with] Foreign Clients!