Hello,

I am taking a little break from work and will be back in about a week. I thought having some time off will do me good, however I keep getting harassed in my ciivy life:
« Stalker », « exs », « guys from the shop/subway”= they don’t know what I do for a living...but I seem to attract them all...
Recently, I have been told by some girls from the agency I work for, that some girls speak behind my back/are jealous...tell me I am like this or like that...
Don’t get me wrong: I am a normal person: don’t do drugs/alcohol, pretty discreet life, not showing off, I might be a bit fragile (very hard life), and people find me attractive: cool and thank god for makeup.
Do you think I am spreading a bad aura maybe due to the work? Do I feel persecuted for nothing? Do you girls have sane issues?
I decided I am going to stop dating/making new friends for a while as apparently I attract very unstable people who don’t want me good...
So I was wondering if you ladies had harrassement issues outside escorting and if the escorting life could have an impact on harrassement in ciivy life

Thanks 

Yes. get harassment from guys in the civvie world. Have tried to be nice but seems to encourage them even more , but really tend to tell them to F**k off as this kind of message  gets your point across in a more direct way.
Have been harassed by a non client for 4 years; was going to go to the Police as he was a potential stalker but stopped because I spoke to his employer instead. They get a warning and leave you alone.
Just don't chit chat to guys as it encourages them even more!

Have a read of a book called "The Gift of Fear" by Gavin deBoeker. It's very eye opening about your instincts (nothing woo-woo, just about how our peripheral vision, unconscious state etc pick up on situations.)

As an adult and since putting in place proper boundaries, I've never been harassed or stalked and I 100% attribute that to being able to say "I am not interested in a relationship with you. If you continue to contact me I will call the police."

Cardibarbie, if you're based in London we could meet up sometime. I'm happy to meet other girls in this line of work as its just so isolating. It gets boring only ever meeting men for work and not having female friends to share things with.

I know how you feel-bullshit from every direction, it's just one of those runs of bad luck some of us get sometimes.but God knows what he's doing-everything happens for a reason and things WIll get better. Trust me, you'll look back and think wow if x hadn't happened I would not be doing y right now and I would never have met z

CurlsnCurve:
Such a shame, I am not based in London sorry lovely
Veggiegal: woo good to know, I am also exploring getting hypnotherapy not sure if that could help, might help to spot the timewasters too
Latty: thanks lovely
Ellie b: 100% with you, it’s hard to spot malicious people more specially doing escorting!

Hm... A personal belief - your life reflects your emotional and mental imprint.
You can call it Karma, like VG said; I rather see it as a vibration we're locked in.
Change your thoughts, deep inner beliefs, deal with traumas that keep your stuck in certain patterns - and the life and reality you create will change accordingly. I guess! 
(A side note to this. If you were victimised in the past, blaming yourself for attracting abusers is not the way to go.
It's rather that the abusers sense your victimisation pattern, recognise you as an easy target and chose you.
It's not your fault, you're not actively attracting them if it makes sense.
Like Grace said, 'they feed off perceived weakness'. )

But then, I don't know!... Some things in life we create, but how about the chaotic randomness that happens?
Maybe it's also about trying to find the meaning to this?
To be a conscious creator of reality on one hand, but then try to find the meaning of random suffering?

What has been helping me is introspection and trying to find the truth, Dr Joe Dispenza's meditation and recently a therapy. I also should get back to 12 steps fellowship, but somehow can't seem to get motivated on a regular basis.

This year I had a stalker, and he was extremely similar to the last 'relationship' (kind of) that I had with an ex-client.
It all fitted with previous experiences I had in life and brought me back to a disgusting and dark place that I thought I will never experience again.
Like VC says, a lot has to do with boundaries.

I don't think that escorting is creating bad aura/ harassment. But if living a double life and so on is causing you stress, if it makes you not feel good about yourself for any reason, it's not helping in being in a peaceful place, is it?
There are so many fears - fear of being outed, of being attacked by a client, of being kicked out of the flat, of being perceived as less than other people. And so on. It all can weigh on you and cause inner turmoil - it does in my case.

Wise words 80s, make sense. Great post. x

Have a read of a book called "The Gift of Fear" by Gavin deBoeker. It's very eye opening about your instincts (nothing woo-woo, just about how our peripheral vision, unconscious state etc pick up on situations.)

As an adult and since putting in place proper boundaries, I've never been harassed or stalked and I 100% attribute that to being able to say "I am not interested in a relationship with you. If you continue to contact me I will call the police."

This is such great advice and that book sounds like a must read.
"putting in place proper boundaries" is probably the best advice I have seen on this site, so a big thank you.
Would add, use this advice, in and out of escorting.